Fourth chapter. EXTREME mature content, yaoi central. Read at your own risk, I know I'm going to hell in a handbasket. I'm surprised I wrote it. Wow. Anyway, I don't own Resident Evil, but David will always be alive in my heart. :) Please review!
To David, everything felt as though things had fallen into place. There was no hesitation or anxiety in his mind and he checked his thoughts over and over again. After several attempts to debunk his perception of the event, he concluded that it felt…right. He gazed down at the man below him, feeling the warmth emanating from his body. That moment lasted for an eternity, lightly resting over Kevin's chest. It felt as though he were floating as he breathlessly watched Kevin's eyes shifted to meet David's…
What is this? In all this time, he never felt anything about anyone. Why now? A part of himself was starting to get fed up with these newfound emotions. An inner turmoil caught and spread through his mind like a mental forest fire all in the span of a few seconds. What is it that he wanted? As fast as cut away from the feeling rising in his chest, more clamored its way to the surface. He fought to show any emotion on his face. What would Kevin say then? Suppress was the way to go, the best way.
The way he always chose.
"Hey, get your heavy ass body offa me." Kevin shoved at his David's chest, and it felt in retrospect almost deliberately weak – a man his size would not have moved an inch with that type of force.
David almost didn't want to move. The gesture broke his mental conflict long enough to sit back against the couch – then wincing at the wound on his back, upright on the cushion. A chill passed through him, as if he felt the absence of Kevin's body heat. He was still wracking his brain when Kevin cleared his throat.
"You never did tell me if you got anything to eat here. I am going to starve!" he stood up abruptly and waltzed over to the fridge. After noting that there was only a six pack and a jar of pickles, he sighed. "Guess we're gonna have to order out. You like Chinese? Pizza?" He had an amused and quirky smile on his face. The look was probably an attempt at humor, for raising his eyebrows soon followed, and David felt himself smirk.
"Yeah, Chinese is fine." he said as he reclaimed his shirt. The decision was mutual.
Fifteen minutes had passed after the call was made, and Kevin had already made short work of four from the six pack compared to David's one. His buzz was more than noticeable as he wavered at the kitchen table.
"and really" he continued his story " I was hoping to get fired. Being at sixth district in Cleveland was worse than frying in Hell on barbeque Friday in the middle of July. If you know what I mean." He grinned at his metaphor, and it seemed the drunker Kevin was the more colorful his language got. "So I just turned up the 'charm'. Working there turned out to be…short term."
Even though Kevin was talking about the past, it seemed that the conversation wasn't helping much with coping or venting. It seemed like a defense mechanism created against any display of true innermost emotion. As an almost expert at watching and listening, David could tell when people were avoiding something. He thought he should intervene.
"You should really stop drinking so much."
"Fuck off." It sounded as though he had been told that too many times.
"You're giving your best to the bottle, you know that."
"I need to mind your own business." Not right, but he got the point.
David knew this wasn't a fight he was going to win easily, so he decided to try a more direct approach. "If you wanted to drink yourself to death, you should've just let those damn zombie freaks eat you instead. It would have saved you the trouble - and money - on booze."
The comment seemed to strike a chord in Kevin, and he stood straight off the chair. He was barely inches away from David's face, and the smell of liquor crept into his nostrils as he spoke. "Never. Bring that up again." Pain and anger was clearly etched onto his face, even in his current state.
Suddenly David had seen it.
In Kevin's piercing blue eyes there was a fiery spark, one that spoke of pure emotion and impulse, the embodiment of his spirit. David recognized this as the truth, the Kevin that he had known two years ago – the one before him now. That spark was still there, buried under layers of denial and pain. A swirl of emotion flickered in Kevin's eyes and seemed to mist in memory. Or in the reaction on his own face, he realized at once when Kevin grabbed his shirt and pulled him forward.
"How would you know about regret? Or loss for that matter? You just left, and I never heard from you again. Is that how you coped? Hiding in this damn little town? Were you just going to blend in and hope no one noticed?" he pushed David back down into his chair, still no more than a breath away from his face. This grip was more forceful than a moment ago and he could hardly believe it came from the same person. "How do you think I felt…when you left?" his tone had quieted to barely a whisper as he spoke the last sentence. David would have been an idiot to not know what that last statement implied, yet here he was dumbfounded and speechless, his own feelings confirmed. He felt the need to argue, contest his feelings, lash out in anger at the surge of heat that welled from his body…
Then there was a knock at the door.
"For Christ's sake, who the fuck is it?" Kevin yelled.
"Chinese delivery." Was the muffled response and Kevin mustered a last push at David before extrapolating the assembled money on the table and throwing open the door. "Here." He shoved the wad into the small, meager looking man and commanded that he keep the change. After the man turned away the door slammed curtly behind him.
"I'm not done with this." Kevin remarked as the food landed on the table.
David was still seething, even though his normal tactic to quell anger by maintaining his nonchalance was running through his mind. It was the same feeling that he had all that time ago, when Kevin saved him in the sewers. It was that brash officer attitude that crawled under his skin and irritated the hell out of it. Two years had passed, and now that they were no longer hunted in Raccoon City, it was time to settle the score. Now was the time to act.
"You are seriously fucked up man," Kevin continued "thinking that you could just crawl under a rock or something. You're the one who thinks I'm screwed up? You need to look at a mirror. You're always fuckin' running and trying to do things your own goddamn way. Alone. You've always been like that. Fuck, are you just going to watch the world go by? You better think before you go giving advice to somebody else, because you're pretty fuckin' messed up yourself." Yes, there seemed a resistance, the constant stream of words slowly ebbing his true emotion out of the equation. Confirmation was there in the form of a dead look in his eyes.
Through all the inner conflict running in his mind he was trying to find his best course of action.
Don't do anything.
Do something. He insulted you again, the fucking asshole.
Hit him, punch him hard in the face and shut him up.
Don't do anything.
He stood up.
What am I doing?
He walked over to Kevin and grabbed his collar.
Haul back and nail him on the chin. Tell him off.
Don't do anything.
Push him back. You hate him, for everything he stands for.
"What are you going to do, asshole? Take your best shot. I've been waiting two years for you to do something – anything, instead of running and hiding. Go head. Hit me, it's been what you've been wanting to do this whole time! You're just a goddamn coward!" the stream of abuse was almost climactic.
David's fist was curled so tightly his knuckled were white. "Shut. Up." David growled through his teeth.
Do it. Shut him up.
The pressure behind his temple his so great that he could feel the throbbing of his heartbeat, and his body trembled with a cold chill.
Don't do it, don't act. His body kept telling him.
David grabbed the side of Kevin's chin. With all the reckless abandon that he had been trying to stave off, he pressed his lips to Kevin's. It was forceful and emotional, as if it were the last breath he was going to take. It was consuming and greedy, the most selfish kiss he ever yielded. When it was done, he pulled away, unable to believe what he had just done. Kevin was in as much shock, he could tell by the look on his face. David's mind was still wracked with the battle going on inside himself, the inner turmoil even more pertinent now after that unspoken confession. He wanted to say something…say something.
Then Kevin returned the favor, lips parting ever so that his tongue poked and prodded David's with a hint of liquor – and something sweet, a taste that was Kevin. It wasn't gentle in any meaning of the word; it was forceful and wanting, probing the creases of his mouth with all the energy of desire.
"Damn you. " Kevin hissed, and started to draw away. "After all this time you choose now to…"
His complaint was ebbed by the mouth clamped onto his with all the fervor as the first time. What the hell am I doing? David thought to himself. Now that he succumbed to this need, he could not suppress it. He was yearning for what Kevin had, a want that stemmed from his very core.
Kevin was not lagging. Tearing into his buttoned shirt, he felt across David's bare nipples and gave them a rough tug, in turn sending waves of pleasure through David's body. He could tell, because his breath came in short shallow gasps.
Kevin never realized how desirable David really was. Somehow after the ordeal of Raccoon City his skin was unmarred yet rough in some patches, all which need to be explored. It was rough and wet, teeth running across bare skin, sending both men into a frenzy of need.
Kevin was slammed against the nearest wall, arms raised above his head. Guessing he deserved it from his violent investigation, as the last nip left a red mark on the olive colored skin. Then it was Kevin's turn to be mauled of his shirt and probed, his large textured hands almost massaging the chest muscles because of the provocative tension.
"Is this what it is, between us? A rough bout of foreplay? Is this what you want?" He closed Kevin's mouth again with his own, this time with a hint of sweat mixed into the wetness. Anything to keep him from talking. He just needed time to think, to weed out his feelings from what he was doing. Was this what he truly wanted?
Kevin kept challenging; not particularly to stop David's advances so much as to increase both of their enthusiasm. The frustration that they harbored toward each other had not decreased during their time apart - if either of them thought about it, quite the opposite happened. Clothes made an audible ripping sound as the rest of Kevin's faded blue shirt fell to the ground.
"You ripped my fucking shirt, you asshole. After you're done screwing around you're getting me a new one." That comment got him slammed against another wall – not exactly a downfall, he thought as David threw off Kevin's belt with a flick of his arm.
Things were moving so fast that David was missing crucial moments to think things though. What exactly was going to happen between them? Where was this leading?
"Bedroom." he mouthed, as if he had replied to his own question.
"I'm not going anywhere, fucker. You're just going to have to-" and he was cut off by the woosh of air from his lungs. He was over David's shoulder then, and he couldn't exactly protest, now that there was nothing left in him – literally. A faint grunt was all he could muster, barely audible past David's heavy footsteps. Rooms of the house whizzed by as Kevin struggled, not exactly in protest, to the better-leveraged David.
Then he fell with a bounce onto a soft mattress, with David following fast. Much like earlier in the night he was over him shirtless, this time slick with sweat and spit. Their mouths roamed over each other, licking and consuming one another with all hurriedness. Kevin could not gauge what was going on in that mind of David's, but that was pretty hard on a normal occasion. There was something in his eyes though, like a lustful wanting look that he had not quite seen before.
Granted there was a look that Kevin would never forget; briefly he thought about that night in the sewer. After they had escaped by ladder, he patted David on the arm. "See that wasn't so bad at all. You just got to listen every now and then." As Kevin said these words his eyes met David's. There was a cold stare in David's eye as he visibly swallowed, his jaw set in protest.
"I didn't need you to save me." David retorted, eyes locked on Kevin's, unmoving and hard.
"Need or want? You would have wound up dead, if it weren't for me." He returned the icy stare. "I'll be damned if you leave me here to face these freaks alone. You're just going to have to deal with it." Kevin suddenly smiled wide. "Living for me wouldn't be so bad, would it?" David was still staring hard at Kevin, but the angry glare had been replaced with something else, a look he couldn't understand.
Looking at David, there was a hint of that look now coupled with a few other emotions he could well describe. Kevin was sure that being so cocky aggravated David – it had with everyone, that wasn't a mystery – but why this?
Those were the precious few seconds that Kevin had to think before he was being dominated by David again, every inch of his chest was wet as he kissed lower, until he reached Kevin's waistline. Swiftly the button and zipper were undone, and there was a tug, causing the pants to practically fly off. This was a frantic pace kept by both men, either of them unwilling to cease their advances. Kevin made all attempts to urge David on by snide remarks. David kept his own pace, regardless of the chiding Kevin dished out.
"What are you planning to do now?" Kevin sneered. "Look, I got shit to do –"
David growled and threw Kevin's arms up and wide, pinning them down to the bed. Kevin groaned in protest, but there was a slight moan involved as well since he wasn't put off to the idea of this handsome man above him. He let his mouth roam over Kevin while he was unable to move in that lover's embrace.
Handsome. Yes, David was handsome – and strong as he struggled against his host. That just made David all the hotter, and when Kevin did break free, he grabbed a handful of hair that had worked its way from the ponytail and pulled. This gave Kevin enough leverage to work David's clothes off and undo the neatly pressed slacks that kept their skin from touching.
David was still reeling from the heated power struggle. It had always been like this; one always had to have it their way, and the other would always object, demanding their own approach. Even then back in Raccoon City it was like this. Back then, however, there was no time to delve deep into the meaning of their relationship.
Now it was blooming before their eyes. They wanted each other. They had always wanted each other; they were both just too stubborn and pig-headed to admit it. Yet here they were, in each other's arms at the moment before breaking threshold of their individually tepid existences.
With a twist of his arm, David had regained the upper hand of their struggle for supremacy. He lay Kevin down and hovered over his now bare skin, lightly brushing the scarred chest – had he noticed those before? – and the delicate pattern felt good on his own skin. The solid erection Kevin was sporting indicated that despite all of the complaints, he too was enjoying himself.
The kissing went deeper, probing the inside of his mouth like there was no better flavor in the world. Kevin still tasted a bit like alcohol and cigarettes, but it was a good taste. Everything about him felt good, felt right to be doing. Why did he feel this way? David pondered.
"Whoa hold on," Kevin murmured. "You're not gonna just push on in without some lube." With that, his hands were released and he rummaged in the nightstand without looking, as their bodies were pressed so tight and their focus was set on each other so heavily. The bottle was grabbed, liquid squeezed and applied within seconds.
Kevin started to protest again as David slid between Kevin's legs. "Why should you be the one to – " but he was pinned and David slid in slowly, spreading him open.
"Ah…" was the only remark Kevin could make. Hot and cold flashes went sparking through his body at the penetration. All of his muscles cried out at this new sensation. It was not altogether unpleasant, and after David was properly mounted, there was nothing he could do to stop from enjoying it.
Then Kevin was pushing him for more.
"Fuck, can't you go any harder?" Kevin grunted. Pain and pleasure mixed together and added more to the power struggle that was their union.
David was happy to oblige as he felt the walls of muscle close in around his cock almost rhythmically. It felt as though he were being pulled in more and more…then there.
"Fuck! Oh my…" Kevin moaned. That was the spot.
"Goddamn." David completed, feeling a surge of his own urgency. He clamped down and kept from ending their fanatical conflict.
Then Kevin was spun around onto his stomach as David applied the proper leverage, propping Kevin's ass upward slightly and entering again, this time with more abandon.
Kevin shouted in elation as David filled the small space with his whole manifestation, getting all the way down to the shaft and back out again several times. Then in a final attempt to outdo the other, he stroked at the g-spot over and over. Kevin rocked back on the entry with a senseless abandon an unyielding supply of energy running through him. A satisfied grin appeared on David's face as he heard Kevin come, hot and sweaty, gasping into the pillow in exultation. He shuddered as the climax ran its course while he was still inside the tender walls, and that was enough to make him spill and collapse in exhaustion.
"I won." David managed.
"Fucker." Kevin cat-called. He rolled over to David and nestled in as David threw an arm around him. This time the kiss was more passionate and caring. David barely felt it; it was as though he were kissed by an angel. He blinked and when he opened his eyes he saw the fiery spark that he knew would be there, Kevin's passionate soul smiling down on him.
"How did you know that you were what I needed?" Kevin asked out loud. "How did we know we needed each other?"
"I don't think we did." David spoke, after several minutes of pondering. He looked down at Kevin and pushed his hair back, which had become unruly during their coupling. "To tell you the truth, I thought I would never see you again after Raccoon City."
"Same here, man. If you were to ask me who the last person I'd fuck would be…well damn, I don't even think you'd be on the list. I'm a class-A womanizer, honestly." He rested his head on David's shoulder. "I'll be the first to say it though. I'm glad that we did."
"Yeah." David agreed. They kissed again, and this time it felt a little more than a passing fancy. Kevin slid his hand around David's cock and stroked up and down over the shaft.
"Again?" David breathed.
"Yeah. My turn." Kevin replied curtly, forcing his way between David's legs. "I mean come on." Kevin seemed an unending supply of energy, and after the work he had to put into this last ordeal, he didn't mind taking the leisurely path as Kevin lubed up and positioned himself for entry.
"So, this is – ah…" David murmured as Kevin slipped past the outer layer.
"Yeah, so how do you like it?" Kevin prodded, trying to win the mental race to the finish. "I got you right where I want you."
"It's so…good…" was the most David could manage.
Soon Kevin had David turned out and huffing in time to their own unspoken song, Kevin standing off the bed and David on all fours, panting and gasping right along in rhythm. It took a little more work for Kevin to figure out what made David tick, but once he found the right spot, everything clicked along easily. His nails dug into David's hip and he pushed all the way down to the shaft and back, quietly whispering his name over and over again. David pushed into the grind, a little more impervious to pain than Kevin, all the while heaving and grunting.
"I'm gonna..." was the only whisper David could manage, and all Kevin could do was smile because he knew that he won this time.
At the contraction of muscles however, his victory was sort lived; he was fast to follow suit to David, muttering all sorts of curses in ecstasy as he was drained, all the life force sapped out of his body.
"I'm done." Kevin announced as he collapsed on the bed next to David. "You can stick a fork in me."
"Fuck?" David mused, raising an eyebrow in a mischievous glance.
"Sure, just give me time to recoop." Kevin winked.
Amongst the splayed sheets in a mixture of sweat and fluid, the two pressed close to each other. After years of depression and pain were they finally together; one complimenting the other in a yin-yang of conflicting energy, one always needing the other to feel complete without realizing it. They would always feel this pull towards one another – their pairing was inevitable.
The only ones who didn't realize this – was each other.
They watched as the sun rose to meet a new day, patterns of color and light splashed across the walls and bed sheets. As he looked longingly at Kevin, David realized that the rest of his days would never feel the same to him. Something in his mind surfaced from the past, something that he had since blocked out from pain or trauma.
It was Kevin, the haughty officer, with a hand on his arm and a spark in his eye. Living for me wouldn't be so bad, would it? David remembered the phrase as clear as the day he heard it now, the shackles of his mind unfolding as his memory came back to him. His muscles had jumped, and hate had burned at his guts…but there was something more, something that he had derived from those eyes that day.
Kevin didn't want him to leave. It had nothing to do with zombie freaks or being unaccompanied to the end. Kevin didn't want to be alone – without him. A brief glance beside him into Kevin's eyes had reaffirmed this awareness. As much as he didn't want to back down because of his pride and arrogance, something in that glimmer had stayed his anger, and quenched his hate. Those eyes are what made him fall, and he always would be captivated by them.
After pondering, which he had only assumed at this point was 'afterglow' did he break the easy silence between them.
"I am…living…for you." The undertone in David's voice was intimate and passionate. "I am…living…because of you. Back then, I would have…" Died, he almost finished.
"I know, just…don't say it." Was all Kevin mouthed, and he rested back into David's arm.
Days around here wouldn't feel the same indeed, David thought to himself. The total irony of day in day out melted away with the catalyst known as Kevin in his life. Flashing back to when he first seen him in the bar, David recalled how against all odds he invited himself into Kevin's life. All the day in day out events of his boring life had been felled in that second, the same shit different day scenario that had become his lifestyle. All this stemmed from an unpredicted incident and a spoken word.
"I suppose idle talk has its place sometimes."
"Hah. Coming from a pessimist like you?"
"No, I'm serious." He smiled, gazing fondly upon Kevin.
For the first time in what felt like an eternity, David slept peacefully. No nightmares, no zombies, no underground hell to plague him at his perpetual end. He felt only the comfort of the blankets and Kevin lying beside him.
When he awoke, the house was eerily quiet. David didn't have to look around to know that Kevin was gone.