CLAIRE
"oh no! Patrick." I suddenly said causing Jake to spill iced tea on his shirt. Oh no.Oh no. Oh no. I knew it, there was something really important about this night. Jake and I were playing the 20 questions game making me totally forget.
"What?" Jake said half angry, half confused.
"I'm sorry Jake , but we have to go, please?" I told him.
"But why?"
"I-I forgot that I have an appointment."
"With Stump." Jake said coldly. I looked at him. His face was hard and emotionless, but his eyes said it all. I'm quite good at reading people's eyes, that's why I know.
"I'm sorry." I said looking down at my half eaten plate of spaghetti. I had ruined his dinner tonight.
He nodded tightening his jaw. "I'll just take the check,then."
I waited and checked my watch. 8:30. OH NO. I should've met Patrick at four.
I followed Jake out to the parking. In the car, he didn't say a word. His face looked like he was going to blow.
"I'm really sorry Jake." I mumbled. I'm not quite sure how he'd react, but I heard a sigh. I couldn't look at him, though.
"Claire, it's okay really." Jake said after a long moment but his tone said otherwise.
The ride home was silent. Jake didn't talk. I guess I knida busted his mood. He kept changing the radio station, finding for the noisiest one.
He stopped the car just infront of our house. I was about to get out when I heard Jake suddenly speak.
"Claire."
I turned and looked at him. His face looked disappointed. "I just wish you were kinda giving me this night. but I guess not." His voice full of disappointement that I didn't want to hear anymore.
"Sorry." I mumbled again.
He stared at me. "Just--Just be safe, okay?"
"Okay." I nodded. I got down and waited for him to drive off. Unlike Patrick, he didn't wait for me to get in before driving off.
I didn't really see Jake as more than a friend. But his tone was unbearable. I just couldn't stand the fact that people hurt because of me.
..but I have other business to attend to.
I wasn'tready to go home just yet. Patrick's house wasn't too far of a walkfrom mine. It was 9, but it didn't matter, he'd still be awake anyway.
I started walking. The cold wind was so cold it burnt my cheeks, but I didn't care. I have to see Patrick.
I walked dragging my feet, my head aching with the cold, my heart heavy. It was literally heavy, likr carrying something that could break my back.
The porch lights in Patrick's house were still turned on. I took a deep breath and knocked. Patrick's mom answered the door smiling at me.
"Hi." I smiled. "Is Patrick home?"
"You're just in time dear. He just got home." She said. "Come in, you look cold." She said stepping aside to let me in.
I managed to mumble a thank you. I suddenly got very nervous as she went up the stairs to call Patrick.
Patrick came down and looked at me, his face a mixture of coldness, anger and hurt. We stared at each other for a long time before i finally decided to speak up.
"w-wanna step outside?" I said. We both know that we don't wanna talk inside because his mom might hear.
HE nodded stiffly. I walked pass him and stepped outside. I was greeted by the cold wind that somehow seemed even colder now. I waited for Patrick to close the door behind him before speaking up again.
"Patrick, I'm really,really,really sorry." I said wrapping my jacket tighter around me.
Patrick tightened his jaw. "I waited. And you don't need to know how long, because obviously, time isn't you thing."
"I'm sorry." I mumbled looking down. I struggled to keep tears from falling. I have really shallow tears.
HE sighed and waked a bit closer to the porch fence, his side to me." It was kinda stupid, you know. Considering the fact that you were with Jake eating spaghetti, while I was waiting for you in the cold." He said controling his emotions.
I really tried my best to control tears from falling. Patrick was angry and I don't know what to do. I didn't speak. I didn't move. I waited for him to finish.
"A-and who knows what you two have been doing. He the hell eats dinner for 4 hours?"
That part I didn't get. "W-what?"
He faced me his eyes burning. "Nevermind. Forget it. I don't even want to talk about what thing you two were doing."
"Patrick, are you accusing me of being a--" I couldn't finish the snetence. This time I couldn't control my tears, they started flowing down my cheeks. He was accusing me of soemthing I didn't do.
As soon as the first tear went down, Patrick's face softened. He bit his lip and looked up at me worriedly. I didn't look at him, I couldn't.
I managed to speak after a few seconds."That's right Patrick.You don't have any right to know what we were doing. I told him wiping tears from my eyes. I still couldn't dare look at him. I couldn't bear the fact that I was about to hurt him more than what I already did. "because we're not even officially together."
I heard Patrick's sharp intake of breath. He didn't expect that. I didn't really expect the overwhelming feeling of hurt that swept over me. I regretted the words as soon as they came out.
Patrick suddenly lowered his head in defeat. "You're right."He said causing me to look at him this time. I couldn't see his eyes, his cap shdowed over them. "We're not really together." He mumbled, hurt reflected on every syllable. I looked away as tears continued flowing down to my cheeks.
Seeing Patrick get hurt, hurts me a thousand time more. Especially for that fact that I was the one hurting him.
Patrick didn't look at me. He just kept his head low. I didn't want to look at him, It'll only make me want to hug and kiss him. And that's the last thing I wanna do right now, to get Patrick more hurt.
"I-I have to go." I said not lookign at him, walkign away. He didn't respond, he didn't even move. But I continued walking, not daring to look back because I might just run back to him.
I didn't want to go home, and I know my mom must be worried sick. But I needed someone to talk to. And I know just the place to go to.