Disclaimer: I own nothing; it all belongs to J.K.Rowling. I'm just borrowing the characters to play with for a while. This is for pleasure only, no profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

"Shouldn't we be hightailing it the fuck out of here, right about now?"

"Hang on," Harry said reading through the note again. "Let's think this through."

Sirius didn't have Harry's patience. "How about this? Someone knows way too much and we're sitting in the middle of the Malfoy fucking Manor. Let's think this through at home instead."

"Keep your panties on, Padfoot," Harry chided. "We're under a Fidelius. We're safe for the moment."

"We've got an hour to walk into what we both know is a trap," Sirius argued.

"No, we don't," Harry replied with certainty. "The hour referred to an hour after reaching the Shrieking Shack. No, the person who left this note didn't know when we'd be here." Harry was still thinking through the situation. He looked closer at massive ruby brooch in the pile of plunder. "And they seem to not care that we're robbing Malfoy."

"Malfoy thinks this is the real diary," Sirius added before settling in quiet contemplation as well. "You think this is That Fucker?"

Harry intermittently winced and frowned. "It doesn't matter if this mystery fucker is that particular fucker or just some other fucker."

"Fuck," Sirius added.

"It's… curious," Harry mused. "This note feels more like a courtesy than a threat."

"You think maybe it's another thief?"

Harry shook his head in consternation. "I don't know. He calls us the Lords Black, so if he wanted to blackmail us, he could've gotten a hold of us in many much easier ways. And how the hell does he know about the horcruxes?"

"Could he have wanted us here? Needed to confirm something? Maybe trap us?"

"I don't think so," Harry uncertainly responded. "But let's load up the rest of this stuff and get out of here."

Sirius frowned. "I know we usually aim for quiet unobtrusive exits, but can we please cause just a little wanton destruction this time?"

"They'll know right away if we do that," Harry argued. "Lucius barely thinks about creatures he considers below him, but even he might connect the whole new house elf and getting robbed at the same time."

"But we're in Malfoy Manor!" Sirius whined. "If someone's fucking with us, we may not have another chance like this."

Harry frowned hating the situation as much as Sirius. Harry's eyes trailed over the pile of things they'd not bagged yet when something caught his attention. A plan began to formulate in his mind. "What if we don't take credit?"

"What do you mean?"

Harry pointed towards an old case with several dials on it. "Do you know what that is?"

"No," Sirius said picking it up.

"You ever hear of a Gubraithian funeral?" Harry asked with a grin.

Sirius looked at the case in glee. "No way!"

"I'm thinking let's tone it down from burning too long," Harry said accepting the case, while inspecting the contents. "And instead we just let it go real big and burn fast."

"Not forever?" Sirius pouted.

Harry shook his head. "We do this big enough and they'll think everything got toasted. We'll make it look like an accident that started inside the safe."

"We take no credit because there was no robbery," Sirius realized.

"No robbery," Harry said. "And this mystery fucker doesn't know we're on to him."

Sirius understood how advantageous this exit would be. He was slowly nodding. "I suppose it'll have to do. It's going to blow big?"

"Real big," Harry said while readjusting the settings of the explosive magical device. He looked up at Sirius who was bagging up the rest of the contents. "And don't forget, Sirius, you're still keyed in to the wards."

Sirius smiled even brighter, getting on board with the 'no apparent robbery' plan. He finished storing away everything and pulled his backpack over his shoulder.

"Okay," Harry said, pleased he'd set it right. "Here's what's gonna happen. I'm going to pull the Fidelius down, at the same time as I trigger the funeral. I set the delay for three seconds. Lucius will feel the Fidelius come down, but hopefully he'll attribute it to the massive fiery explosion."

"Three seconds?" Sirius asked.

"You're keyed in to the wards so you're going to be apparating us both out," Harry nodded. "Questions?"

Sirius saw Harry drape a magic muting cloth over the physical hole in the blood-warded safe. He walked over and put his hand on Harry's shoulder. "Nope."

"Ready?"

Sirius nodded.

Harry nodded back and touched his wand to the front dial on the case. Four invisible magical arms reached out and grabbed the anchor stones right as the tip of Harry's wand began to glow, igniting the Gubraithian funeral. He dropped it over the hole as the anchor stones flew towards him and the room flickered in and out of view. "Go! Go! Go!"

Sirius drew on Harry's strength and apparated them out of Malfoy Manor. The last thing Harry saw was the cloth wrapping around the case as it fell into the safe, without triggering any of the safe's protections.

A couple of apparition hops were added for safety's sake before the pair of thieves dropped off their score at secure location. Rather than sorting through it now, they agreed to just head back at Grimmauld Place.

Sirius and Harry stood there silently, coming down from the adrenaline-filled night of failure and success.

"Someone knows way too much," Sirius said.

Harry nodded pensively.

Sirius realized he felt a lot less safe than he had a day ago. "What are we going to do about it?"

Harry shook his head. "I don't know."

"You got the diary and note?"

Harry pulled them from inside his robe and handed them over. "Not a drop of magic on either."

Sirius read through the note again. "It's not Dumbledore."

"No," Harry agreed.

"And it's not Voldemort."

Harry slowly shook his head. "No."

"I think it's That Fucker," Sirius concluded.

Harry sighed and turned to walk up the stairs. "I hope it is."

"You do?" Sirius wondered.

Harry stopped on the first step, with his hand on the banister. "There are enough dangerous fuckers in this world as it is. We don't need more."

Sirius frowned. "You're not thinking about leaving, are you?"

"No," Harry assured him. "But I am starting to miss not having to worry about wizards smarter and more powerful than me."

"Well what did you search me out for then?" Sirius said with a grin. His grin faltered when he saw Harry still looked tired. "Didn't you have politicians and Death Eaters after you in the old world?"

Harry shrugged. "Not as much as you might think. The remaining Death Eaters remembered my escape. Couple that with the fact that I took down Voldemort and I earned a healthy amount of fear in those trying to oppose or use me for their own gain."

"You could always take out Voldemort here," Sirius suggested.

Harry shook his head. "I can't, Sirius. And if you knew what I haven't told you, you wouldn't want me to either."

"Fair enough," Sirius said, making it clear he wasn't pushing the issue. "I'm just brainstorming." Sirius paused, noticing Harry was standing on the first step, still lost in thought. "What are you thinking?"

Harry turned to his godfather and looked at him incredulously.

Sirius exasperatedly explained, "I haven't forgotten tonight. I'm just wondering specifically what's got you making that face."

"I'm thinking about the person who left the note," Harry added as he began to walk up the stairs. "They were either good enough or close enough to Malfoy to get into the vault. That points towards Death Eater if they were trusted or Death Eater thuggery if they weren't. And it's only been in the last few weeks."

"We hit Weston's almost three months ago," Sirius inquired.

"I know," Harry said from the top of the stairs. "But this was the fucker watching us at the Gaunt House. I'm almost certain of it."

"You think?" Sirius asked.

"He knows that we knew exactly where to look for the ring," Harry clarified. "That's why he thought we might know exactly where to look for the diary. I need to think on this."

Sirius turned towards the kitchen. "And I need to drink on this."

Harry woke up around one in the afternoon and headed for the kitchen for some late breakfast.

He walked in and saw Dobby sitting cross-legged on the kitchen table, looking worriedly at a drunk Sirius.

"Great news!" Sirius cheered loudly.

Harry looked at Sirius doubtfully.

"Malfoy Manor is still burning," Sirius happily added, showing off the Daily Prophet's front page photo. A column of flame could be seen escaping a good sized hole in the roof. "Lucius is being cited for not registering a class one restricted item as a family heirloom."

Harry wasn't certain but he thought he saw Dobby smile. "I set it for fifteen minutes."

"You set it for fifteen days," Sirius happily corrected.

"Oops," Harry said thinking that as mistakes go, this one was pretty fucking awesome. "Do you think it still…?"

Sirius nodded. "The DMLE investigators early determination was that if the unregistered Gubraithian device burned hot enough to destroy a blood-warded safe, then it definitely burned hot enough to completely incinerate the contents."

"Fuck me," Harry grinned. "Karma's making a quick comeback."

"I'll say," Sirius agreed. "You got a letter from Albus."

"Aww bugger," Harry swore. "You want to get me a bowl of cereal, Dobby?"

"Thank you, Master," Dobby said, eagerly hopping off the table and over towards the cabinets.

Harry blinked. "Did you order him to stay there with you?"

Sirius drank the last of his bottle. "I didn't want to drink alone."

"You made him drink?" Harry asked in surprise. He noticed Dobby was pouring cereal and missing the bowl.

"Dobby, stop!"

Dobby was still pouring cereal onto the counter as he turned to Harry and said, "Yes, Master."

"Here," Harry said, grabbing the box of cereal from Dobby. "Do you need any potions? Or a hangover cure?"

Dobby shook his head but leaned over and hugged Harry. "Dobby loves Master."

Harry patted the slightly inebriated elf on the back. "Just take it easy, Dobby. Relax, sleep it off, whatever you need to do. And check with me the next time that idiot gives you a stupid order, okay?"

"Thank you, Master," Dobby said snapping his fingers. He turned to look at his tiny elf hand in surprise. "Dobby thought-"

The little elf with low tolerance disappeared in mid-sentence from the kitchen.

Sirius snickered. "New toys are fun."

"Dobby's not a toy," Harry scolded as he added milk to his cereal. He sat down at the table across from Sirius and looked at the letter. "What do you think the odds are that it's good news?"

"It's not a howler," Sirius said. "And Fawkes delivered it."

"Fawkes?" Harry asked looking up. "Didn't stick around?"

Sirius exaggeratedly shook his head. "Stupid bird ran away after I ordered Dobby to tackle him."

"You need to get laid," Harry chided with a smile.

Sirius growled, knowing he still had two more days before his next appointment with Healer Armstrong. "I will hurt you. I'm an angry drunk."

Harry just smiled quietly knowing it would infuriate Sirius. He opened up the letter from Albus and read it quickly. "Lovely."

"I'd ask what," Sirius began.

Harry was already answering. "He knows what a horcrux is and he knows we did something to Jimmy."

"But I'm too drunk to remember anything," Sirius finished.

Harry figured that was just as well. He looked over at Sirius and recalled an especially unpleasant memory. "You know those charmed mirrors we used to use?"

"I'm not wearing the homo-erotic arranged marriage necklaces except we're both doing recon at the same time. That was the agreement."

Harry narrowed his eyes. "You know why we have to use the necklaces."

"Yeah because you broke your mirror," Sirius pouted.

Harry shook his head. "If you were capable of using them like an adult…"

"I think the purpose for which I accidentally used the wrong mirror proves I'm an adult," Sirius argued.

"You were shaving your balls!"

"There are places you need a mirror to see," Sirius defended.

"You called me on it!"

Sirius waved Harry off. "I wasn't calling you. I was making an observation after getting the mirror angled right so I had a clear look at my-"

"I thought my mirror was cursed and showing me the face of true evil."

"Even if it was, you didn't have to break it."

"Yes, I most certainly did," Harry forcefully snapped.

Sirius tipped back an empty bottle and was trying to suck a few more drops out. "You're the one who brought it up." Sirius dropped his arm and empty bottle down in disgust. "What were we talking about again?"

"Charm-linked mirrors," Harry repeated in irritation. "Were they like a family heirloom? Or did you make them yourself?"

"Family heirloom? Are you kidding?" Sirius asked skeptically. "A pair of Lookie Talkies is about two galleons at any Wiz-mart."

"Lookie Talkies?" Harry repeated thinking that sounded smarter than most magical names but still dumb as hell.

"Yeah. They're children's toys," Sirius explained. "We used to use them all the time when we'd play blood traitors and muggle…" Sirius trailed off. "You probably wouldn't have played the same games I did growing up."

"Probably not," Harry confidently agreed.

"Well except for Tie-Harry-to-the-back-of-the-bus," Sirius grinned. "Everybody played that one."

"How the hell do you remember that when you don't even remember what we were talking about three minutes ago?"

Sirius shook another empty bottle and frowned. "What were we talking about?"

Harry sighed. "Take a hangover potion and go to sleep, Padfoot."

It showed how out of it Sirius was that he obeyed without protest.

Harry tucked a brand new pair of Lookie-Talkies into his cloak pocket and walked up the long path towards Hogwarts. He briefly wondered the odds that Jimmy would just happen to activate the Marauder's Map and notice an extra Potter on it. Harry wasn't worried this time though, because he knew how the young man would react.

Harry, not looking forward to the conversation with Albus, was slightly tempted to try and locate Jimmy first. It was late afternoon, and Harry had no clue what Jimmy's schedule was like. Albus, Harry expected to be in his office. But if Harry were to go hunting for Jimmy, he would be risking getting cornered by Lily.

Harry felt he had enough things rolling around in his head that he could safely put 'constant deception and lies of omission towards the elder Potters' onto the back burner where it'd set up camp and been living ever since Harry arrived in this world. It certainly didn't help matters that so far Lily Potter could detect bullshit from Harry better than a Master Legilimens.

Harry estimated that sacrificing his mother's soul probably meant that karmically, every other Lily Potter in existence had him by the balls until the end of time. Of course when Harry had made that deal, he wasn't planning on actually meeting any of them.

But that's what bottles and back burners were made for, Harry told himself, putting things like emotions and uncomfortable confrontations safely away and out of sight.

Harry was so pleased with his plan of inaction that he wasn't even watching where he was going and managed to walk right into the door.

Harry fell back on his ass tumbling down the front steps. "Fuck me! What the hell?"

"Are you alright?" a gentle voice inquired as the front door creaked open.

"Hang on, mum," another voice interrupted. A second redheaded woman emerged and looked down towards Harry with a grin. "Was that an offer?"

"Sarah!" Lily scolded her daughter. "That's no way to talk to… oh. Harry. Excuse me, Lord Black."

"I'm sure people talk to him that way quite often," Sarah commented, "if Witches Weekly is to be believed."

Sarah and Lily Potter had both walked down the steps to help Harry and were looking at him oddly. Sarah saw Harry wincing and asked, "Did you hit your head?"

"My nose mainly," Harry grumbled, testing the sensitivity of his schnozz. "What happened? I thought the doors opened automatically."

Lily looked at Harry curiously, wondering if he'd somehow attended Hogwarts. She was doing her best to ignore the monster in her chest sensation. "They open automatically for students and invited guests. I take it no one is expecting you today?"

"No, I…" Harry stumbled over the words. "Uh… Albus wrote me this morning."

"Oh good," Lily said as she and Sarah helped Harry to his feet. "I was hoping that was why you were here."

Harry glanced over at Sarah and then Lily, thinking he'd never feel normal around either of these two people. "Err… why is that?"

"Something's been bothering him," Lily replied thinking Albus rarely showed it, but she knew him better than most. "And a magical brother might bring him out of his funk."

Harry knew she was speaking of the brotherhood charm but couldn't stop himself from glancing at Sarah again. "I'll see what I can do about that. You know if he's in his office?"

"Should be," Lily replied. She looked towards her daughter. "Did you need to check Harry out?"

Sarah smirked at her mother. "Need's kind of a strong word but I like what I-"

"His head, his nose," Lily snapped. "The fall, you know what I meant. And don't think I won't start carrying around baby pictures."

"Baby pictures are cute," Sarah countered.

Lily tilted her head down at the unexpected challenge. "And do we remember when we kept trying to wear our little brother's diapers?"

Sarah stared at her mother aghast.

Harry hurriedly interjected, "I'm fine. It was nothing."

"Thank you," Lily said, thinking she may have gone too far based on the looks her daughter was giving her.

"But I wouldn't mind seeing those pictures sometime," Harry mischievously added.

Lily smothered a grin as her daughter glared at her.

Sarah dangerously warned, "The things I could show Dad in a pensieve."

Lily decided at that point she had definitely gone too far. She smiled pleasantly at Harry, "Would you like us to walk you to the Headmaster's office?"

"No, please," Harry said as he made a fist and knocked himself in the head. "I'm fine." Harry winced, "Okay, that kind of hurt, but seriously. I'm fine."

Sarah looked at Harry in slight surprise. "You know how to find the Headmaster's office?"

Harry nodded with certainty.

"Don't worry," Lily assured her daughter while giving a knowing look to Harry. "Lord Black knows his way around Hogwarts better than you think."

Harry watched the first two female Potters he'd ever remembered meeting walk down the rest of the steps and along the path towards Hogsmeade. He idly realized he could try and track down Jimmy without worry when he felt a tug on a different piece of active magic.

"Harry?" the wizened old voice greeted.

"Albus," Harry replied turning towards the Headmaster with a look of innocence on his face.

Albus frowned. "Why don't we talk in my office where I can yell and you can lie with impunity?"

"Sounds like fun," Harry agreed and led the way.

Albus immediately went for the seat behind his desk, establishing himself into a position of power. "What did you do to my Head Boy?"

Harry glanced around the office, noting Fawkes perch was unoccupied. "What makes you think I did anything?"

"Harry."

"What do you think I did?"

"Harry."

"I'm not kidding," Harry argued. "For all I know, you think I cursed him, so I need to hear an accusation to respond to."

Albus was unruffled. "You memory charmed him."

"I did, did I?"

"Harry James Potter."

Harry playfully winced. "Ouch. Breaking out the full name?"

"If treating you like a child is the only way to get answers," Albus said defending his actions.

Harry shrugged and helped himself to the candy dish. "It sounds like you have the answers."

"Not the why," Albus retorted, "nor the how."

Harry smirked inwardly, deducing that Albus hadn't been able to find the block. "Did you check him for memory charms?"

Albus nodded. "Twice. And I must concede your skill at obliviating is superior to my own."

Harry shrugged. "There are four charms I'm real good at. Memory charming is my fourth best."

Albus was rubbing his chin in thought, "I assume summoning and banishing are the top two."

Harry nodded.

"So what is the third?"

"You don't want to try and guess?" Harry said popping a lemon drop in his mouth. "The third one has more than a little personal significance."

Albus thought about what he knew of the young man relaxing across from him. "Snake charming?"

Harry blinked. "Is there a field of magic for that?"

"There are a few ancient spells involving serpents, but I believe snakes typically obey a parselmouth, making many of them unnecessary. Nevertheless, I can see that was an inaccurate guess." Albus shook his head. "I'm not sure I know you well enough to think of any others with personal significance."

"Tsk, tsk," Harry shook his head. "After all, the other you talked my parents into using the charm that inadvertently led to my orphanhood."

"The Fidelius," Albus said in realization. "The reason for your interest in warding?"

"Part of it," Harry agreed.

"And you're better at casting the Fidelius than memory charming?" Albus asked more than a little impressed.

"I don't know if I'd say better, but there's definitely less competition."

Albus inclined his head in understanding. "Does this mean you're not going to be telling me the how or why?"

"The how is easy," Harry answered. "I knew you'd search him for a memory charm when he got back. And unless you're very careful doing that, you tend to kick up a lot of dust."

"Being careful takes time and attentive observation of the memories," Albus reasoned aloud. "Something a cursory examination never is."

Harry nodded. "Then I come back a couple days later and make use of all that dust you kicked up. That's why even if you located it… It'll appear as though you cast it."

"It sounds like a form of layering," Albus commented.

"Exactly," Harry grinned. "Layering is where memory charms really get fun. You should've seen the job I did on these Unspeakables."

"Excuse me," Albus said after Harry suddenly went quiet.

"Nothing bad," Harry said waving away Albus' worries.

"Mmm-hmm."

Harry tiredly explained. "It was my arrival in this world. New person comes shooting out the Exit, and they'd probably grill me for days. I wanted to locate my godfather, so I had to send them in a different direction."

Albus snapped his fingers. "You're Miss Lupin's assignment! That explains a lot."

Harry nodded.

"But what about when she had to go away for days at a time, undercover?"

Harry shrugged. "We rented a lot of movies and laid on the couch."

Albus frowned in disappointment. "I shouldn't have to remind myself you're not a bad person."

"You can be a good person and a bad influence," Harry offered.

Albus murmured in resignation. "You've given me the how but still no why. Should I stop asking?"

"I'm going to tell you the why," Harry assured him. "In case he comes in again and we have to obliviate him again."

"We?" Albus doubtfully questioned.

"The why," Harry continued, "is because Jimmy convinced me to. It was his idea."

"It was?" Albus repeated, ensuring the brotherhood charm was still working.

Harry nodded. "Frankly, we don't trust Snape not to rip the knowledge from Jimmy's head."

Albus frowned. "Professor Snape has my full-"

"Blah, blah," Harry interrupted. "You're as blind to that man as Cornelius Fudge is to fashion."

Albus frowned harsher.

"Trust me," Harry argued. "Until you've been a Potter in his classroom for a few years, you won't get it. I mean it. The sheer volume of hate and petty in that man is limitless where I'm concerned and it doesn't sound like Jimmy's much better."

Albus nodded slowly. "I'll consider it a personal issue and the matter closed. But do not underestimate what I will do when it comes to protecting the wellbeing of students entrusted to my care."

Harry knew many people doubted Albus' judgment, and a few doubted his sanity, but no one doubted his dedication to Hogwarts. "Your intentions are not the same as your actions."

Albus tilted his head to watch Harry impassively. "Do tell."

"I've no doubt you act in what you believe to be the best interests of students," Harry explained when he saw Albus scrutinizing him. "But sometimes I think your attempts to redeem men like Snape do more harm to innocents than you realize."

Albus frowned at the words. "Severus Snape needs no redemption. Please," Albus said stopping Harry from interrupting. "He never became a Death Eater and you've only met him briefly."

Harry reluctantly had to admit this world's Snape could be a bit different. But he doubted it.

"My counterpart may have had a blind spot for Severus, and I may as well, but you must admit that you cannot view him objectively either."

Harry grumbled but didn't disagree. "He's a poohead."

"Moving on," Albus said steepling his hands together as he leaned forward. "Tell me everything you can about the Dark Lord's horcrux."

Harry winced at unexpected lack of subtlety from the Headmaster. "Looked that one up, eh?"

Albus' look was grave. "You were not particularly discreet in your allusions towards its importance."

"It?"

"The horcrux," Albus replied.

"Right," Harry grimaced. "It."

Albus frowned as he felt the brotherhood charm buzzing. "What aren't you telling me?"

"You ever think horcruxes get lonely?"

Albus paused at the odd question. "What do you mean?"

"Nothing," Harry said, fully aware that answer wasn't going to fly.

"Harry."

"So you know what a horcrux is, right?"

Albus nodded affirmatively.

"And you know how they're made? And how supposedly you can't make more than one because it'd leave you insane?"

"Oh no," Albus said catching on.

Harry nodded ruefully. "You ever hear Voldemort's spiel on how seven is the most magically powerful number?"

"Seven?" Albus whispered the word in horror. "Now is really not the time for your offbeat sense of humor."

"Yeah," Harry admitted with a scratch of his head. "This world is different. I mean a lot's the same, but not everything. Even still, I'm reasonably sure on the number."

"You know where they are," Albus realized.

"This world's different," Harry retorted. "They're not even all the same objects here."

Albus sat back and relaxed slightly, secure in the knowledge that Harry had been investigating them. "How so?"

Harry saw a calculating look in the old man's eye. "Alright, well, I know of one that's definitely new to me. And to be honest, I'm kind of surprised you haven't figured it out."

Albus arched an eyebrow. "Godric's Hollow?"

Harry realized he'd spoken too soon on what the Headmaster knew and nodded. "My death was used to make a horcrux out of Sirius Black's skull."

"Oh my word," Albus muttered in dawning realization that Voldemort was truly beyond redemption.

"And in this world," Harry continued. "From what I hear, the Dark Lord doesn't even have a familiar."

"Not to my knowledge," Albus replied when Harry waited for a response.

Harry nodded. "In mine, he had a snake named Nagini, which he possessed frequently and contained another piece of him."

Albus cast a quick Patronus charm, sending a ghostly phoenix from his office.

Harry looked at Albus warningly.

"Professor McGonagall was about to interrupt us," Albus said, knowing the brotherhood charm would assure Harry. "I told her this was a bad time."

"If you need to-"

"No, please," Albus said urging Harry to stay.

"Sorry," Harry offered. "I just got your note, and figured I'd drop by while Sirius sleeps off his bender."

"I do have dinner plans I'd prefer not cancel," Albus urged. "So why don't you tell me which horcruxes you've already located and which others you are still looking for."

Harry wasn't surprised at what the Headmaster had deduced. "What makes you think that… yeah. Who am I kidding?" Harry gave up acting coy. "Three of them are safe. Three of them aren't."

Albus felt pleasantly surprised. "You have recovered three of them? And I thought you said there were seven."

Harry nodded. "Six horcruxes, the seventh piece of soul stayed in him."

"Of course," Albus said in understanding. "What can you tell me about them?"

Harry frowned. "I'm not some resource for you to tap, Albus. Nor am I member of your Order." Harry clenched and sent magic into the brotherhood charm.

Albus clenched and strengthened the charm on his end. He forcefully asserted, "Nor am I the man for whom you hold so many conflicting emotions." Albus softened. "I do not see you as a resource, Harry. I'm not proud of the Albus Dumbledore you knew in your old world. And I cannot say that faced with the decisions he had to make, that I would have made them any differently. But I will not accept the blame you feel he deserves."

Harry looked away, slightly embarrassed.

"This charm," Albus said flaring the brotherhood bond, "is so that we can better understand each other and work together. It should not be a security blanket because you suspect ulterior motives in my every action."

"I know. It's not you," Harry argued. "I'm just… I'm feeling a lot more vulnerable suddenly and frankly, paranoia's probably saved my life a time or two."

Albus popped a lemon drop into his own mouth and smiled. "True. But it's probably cost you opportunities as well. Would you like to talk about it?"

Harry looked up at the Headmaster. He hesitated before answering, "Not really, but even if I did, this is stuff I have to talk to Sirius about first anyway."

"Fair enough," Dumbledore accepted. "And so now when I politely inquire about the horcruxes, can I assume you won't think I only want your knowledge and to be rid of you? Or that my only concern in things is how they pertain to the downfall of Voldemort?"

"Yes, yes, point made," Harry grumbled. "Now you're just rubbing it in."

Albus held a pleasant smile that slipped into a slight frown when Harry stayed quiet. "How can I help you locate the other horcruxes if you won't tell me anything? I suspect I know more about this world than you."

"The skull," Harry decided. "That's the one you should focus on."

Albus nodded slowly in thought. "And what of the others?"

"The three that are safe…" Harry paused, "you don't need to worry about." Harry saw Albus giving him a knowing look and explained, "It's between me and Sirius, I'm not just being petulant."

"Mmm-hmm," Albus said doubtfully.

"The other two?" Harry said, running through things in his own mind. "I think… I think someone else got to them already."

Albus sat up suddenly. "Someone else knows? The wizard in black?"

"Someone," Harry shrugged. "I'm pretty sure it's not a Dark Lord approved someone, but I don't know why they're collecting."

"What are they?"

Harry was still thinking about the note from the other horcrux hunter and answered distractedly, "The Slytherin family ring in my world was hidden at the Gaunt house. When I looked I saw signs it had once been there and there were collapsing wards surrounding the former hiding place."

Albus frowned. "You don't think Voldemort removed it for safe-keeping?"

"No," Harry assured him.

"And why not?"

Harry turned to Albus, suddenly realizing how distracted he'd been. "For reasons I'm not going to go into."

Albus sat back and raised his hands in surrender. "I'm not pushing. Just asking once."

"Right," Harry chuckled as he decided on exactly what he would reveal. "I will tell you that I think That Fucker or whoever it is that has the ring, that they also have the diary."

"The diary?" Albus perked up.

"The other horcrux," Harry confirmed. "It too appeared to have been moved by the same person."

"Where was it?" Albus inquired.

Harry snapped his mouth shut. He shook his head. "It wasn't there, so it doesn't matter." Harry glanced at his watch. "Why don't we call it a day and you can make your dinner plans?"

Albus looked at Harry hopefully. "There isn't anything else you'd like to share?"

"Actually," Harry said taking pleasure in playing with Albus' emotions. "I need to talk to Jimmy before I go. You mind telling me where he is?"

Albus frowned. "No."

"Was that a 'no' you don't mind? Or a-"

"No."

"It'll just take a moment," Harry argued.

Albus reached into one of his drawers and twisted a number of concentric circles until a point lit up with a blue light and settled. "He's coming here. If it'll just take a moment, you can talk here."

Harry wore a look of mock disappointment. "You don't even trust me to meet with Jimmy alone?"

Albus inclined his head to look over his glasses at Harry. "And what happened the last time you met with Jimmy alone?"

"I memory charmed him and made it look like you did it," Harry bashfully admitted.

"Mmm-hmm," Albus said.

"What was that thing anyway?" Harry said pointing towards the Headmaster's desk drawer.

Albus smiled mirthfully. "I'm not surprised you didn't recognize it. It's a way to contact and coordinate with the prefects and the Head Boy and Girl. The circles are each linked with a badge. I've instructed the Head Boy to come to my office and that it is not an emergency."

"Hmph," Harry chided. "I'll have you know your counterpart felt I deserved the prefect badge but didn't want to burden me with the whole prophecy and chosen one stuff already on my plate."

Albus presented an almost genuine look of embarrassment. "My apologies. And the Head Boy?"

"You were dead by then," Harry grinned victoriously. "Pity."

Albus frowned when Harry stuck his tongue out at him.

"Headmaster?" Jimmy called out as he opened the office door.

"Come in, Mr. Potter, come in," Albus urged.

Jimmy noticed the other person present. "Harry?"

"Hiya, Jimmy," Harry greeted.

"What are you doing here?" Jimmy asked glancing between the Headmaster and Harry. "You didn't do anything stupid, did you?"

Harry used a magical arm to flick his sort of brother in the ear. "Watch it."

Jimmy swatted uselessly by his ear and turned to the Headmaster curiously.

Albus motioned towards Harry. "Lord Black wished to have a brief word with you." Albus saw both Potters giving him the same look but he wasn't going anywhere. "I feel the need to chaperone."

Harry pulled out his Lookie Talkies and handed one to Jimmy. "I wanted to make sure you had a way to instantly contact me."

Jimmy accepted the small mirror in confusion. "Thanks, Harry. Not that I don't appreciate it but is there something I should know?"

"Excellent question," Albus immediately responded. "Harry?"

"No," Harry said with a glare at the Headmaster. "Nothing you should know. I'm just being cautious."

"Cautious?" Jimmy repeated.

Harry shrugged. "Yeah, cautious."

Albus looked at Harry and saw he was done. "Thank you, James. That will be all."

"Headmaster," Jimmy bid goodbye. "See you, Harry."

"Oh Jimmy," Harry suddenly recalled. "Do me a favor and please, please, don't use that mirror to shave your balls."

Jimmy looked at his half of the Lookie Talkie set again. "No worries. I doubt it's sharp enough even if I wanted to."

Harry waved goodbye as Jimmy disappeared out the door. Harry felt worry creep into his stomach. "He was just kidding, right?"

"I like to think so, but I wouldn't bet the castle on it," Albus grinned knowing the Head Boy's appreciation for taking advantage of the stereotypes of Gryffindors.

Harry decided not to give it any further thought. "I'm going to go."

"If I find anything noteworthy about the… items, shall I contact you?"

"Yeah," Harry said in surprise. "I'd appreciate that. I've got some personal stuff kinda going on right now that I need to figure out, but I'll be around."

Albus carefully worded. "Is this 'stuff' the reason you're feeling 'cautious'?"

Harry nodded. "I just got a bad feeling. By giving Jimmy a mirror, now he'll most likely never have an occasion to need to use it. But if I'd thought about it, and I'd not given him the mirror, then inevitably he would have needed it."

Albus stroked his beard. "I knew a man who utilized similar logic. On the days that clear weather was especially important, he would always carry an umbrella, in hopes to stave off the rain. It worked for him twice."

"See? Exactly," Harry agreed.

Albus thinned his lips adding, "And then it rained for two years straight."

Harry responded with the strongest logic in his arsenal. "You're a poohead too. Goodbye," Harry said as he left the office.

"Okay, what was that?" Sarah quietly asked when she felt they were out of earshot.

"What was what?" Lily replied in a whisper.

"Lord Black knows his way around Hogwarts better than you think," Sarah repeated in a deep and mocking voice.

"I don't sound like that," Lily scolded.

"That's debatable, but I meant the unspoken 'wink, wink, nudge, nudge' in your tone."

Lily sometimes forgot how observant her daughter was. "You know we all assumed the Lord Blacks never went to Hogwarts, right?"

"Yeah?"

Lily looked both ways before answering, "The way he expected the doors to open, that's a relatively common mistake. But it's common in graduates coming back to the castle for the first time. People with seven years experience of the doors opening for them."

Sarah looked over at her mum. "You think Harry went to Hogwarts?"

Lily walked into the Hog's Head as her daughter held the door open. "I don't see how we could have missed him, but yeah, I think he went to Hogwarts."

"He's younger than Tonks," Sarah replied. "Goodness knows she's been bragging about that enough. So did he change his name?"

Lily saw Gin Weasley behind the bar looking at her when the forward young woman loudly asked. "The usual?"

"Yeah, please," Lily and Sarah said as they dropped their cloaks onto the backs of their chairs.

"Like we'd ever risk anything else here," Sarah muttered quietly.

Lily smirked at her daughter. "I've heard some people rave about the Friday Fried Surprise."

"That's like calling Bertie Botts your favorite candy. You know what it is, don't you?"

Lily shook her head. "I thought it was a secret, hence the surprise."

"She just refries the leftovers from throughout the week. No two orders taste the same and she's not even sure what most of them are. That's the surprise."

"That's revolting," Lily calmly decided.

"That's bar food," Sarah assured her. "The idea is to get you drunk enough not to really look at what you're eating. And make the food salty enough that you need another drink."

"I'm beginning to think you're a little too familiar with bar room settings," Lily chided. "You know what they'll do to your skin."

"Oh please. The Hog's Head hardly counts as a bar. No one comes here looking to dance or looking to dance. And you never answered my question."

Lily took a moment to remember the question and frowned. "I don't want to spend all our time gossiping about Harry. I feel like we never get to talk anymore."

"Okay," Sarah readily agreed. "What's on your mind?"

Lily smiled back and opened her mouth, only to snap it shut a few seconds later. She opened her mouth again and began to make a hand gesture, before catching herself and closing her mouth once more. She came to a decision and was about to speak when Gin Weasley arrived with their order.

"Two beer nut salads," Gin announced settling down the large bowls. "And two house ales. Anything else?"

Sarah had already picked up her fork and answered, "Yeah. Do you know if Harry Black went to Hogwarts under a different name?"

Gin actually stumbled at the mix of the question and the oaths preventing her immediate response. "Huh?"

Lily was intrigued by the unexpected reaction. "This all looks wonderful, Gin. Thank you."

"My pleasure," Gin said with a nod.

"We were just about to gossip about the Lord Blacks. Care to join us?"

"We were, eh?" Sarah said grinning at her mum.

Lily nodded.

"Come on, Gin," Sarah urged. "I'll tell you all about how awkward Mum is around Harry."

"Okay," Gin said brimming with curiosity. She untied her apron and spun it around to her side. "Now what's this about Harry and awkward?"

Lily glared her daughter into silence and pounced on the new addition to their table. "Before we get into that, Miss Weasley, I think we need to have a talk about using permanent marker in improper ways on my son."

Gin Weasley looked at Sarah for help and gulped. "Yes, Mrs. Potter."

"Relax," Lily said with a grin. "I'm just having you on. I know it was Harry and Sirius who did that."

"Oh good," Gin said with a forced laugh. "You really had me going there, Mrs. Potter."

Sarah raised a curious eyebrow, wondering if her little brother's crush wasn't as unrequited as she first assumed.

Ginny saw both Potter women scrutinizing her and defiantly urged. "Were you saying something about Harry?"

Lily glared, every bit the mother thinking of her baby, and then nodded pleasantly. "He acts like he went to Hogwarts. But none of us recognize him or anyone similar."

"He probably would have gone around your time," Sarah said with a nod towards Gin. "Maybe a couple of years older, but he's younger than Tonks."

Gin tapped her chin, deep in thought. "You're thinking about Fred and George's year?"

"Anywhere around there," Sarah replied.

Gin was slowly shaking her head. "No, I can't think of any wizards fitting Harry's attitude and power."

"I have a wild theory," Lily offered.

"But," Gin interrupted, pointing a finger in the air and maintaining her perfectly stoic expression.

"Oh?" Lily perked up.

Gin began to slowly nod. "But there was this one witch."

"No," Sarah gaped, "way."

Lily furrowed her brow. "You think Harry's…"

"I don't know," Gin lied. "But there was that one witch who was always so quiet and really strong magically."

"I knew those eyelashes looked too good," Sarah cheered.

Lily frowned. "So are you implying he's a male who pretended to be female in school? Or a female pretending to be male now?"

"Well you know," Gin confided, "Auror Lupin is a Black by birth, so there's definitely a metamorph gift in the bloodline. Maybe Harry's…" Gin shifted her hands as if testing imaginary weights. "A little from column A and a litlle from column B."

Sarah's face was momentarily stuck in mix of disbelief and disgust. She shook her head and turned to her mother. "Didn't you have a wild theory?"

"It somehow doesn't feel as wild as it did a moment ago," Lily said in bewilderment. "But considering it appears he went to Hogwarts and no one knows him, I thought that he might simply be a time traveler."

Gin shook an accusing finger. "That would actually explain the dual Lord Black thing."

Sarah gasped and pointed at her mother. "That's why you two get retarded around each other. He's like your great, great grandson from the future."

Gin tilted her head to look at Lily. "He does have your eyes."

"I noticed that," Lily uncomfortably admitted. "But I'm not so sure he's from the future."

"What are you saying?" Sarah asked curiously.

Lily took a deep breath before quietly conceding, "That I think he might be… could be… your real grandfather."

Sarah blinked, exclaiming loudly. "You think he's your dad?"

Gin was leaning off to her side, having a small coughing fit.

Lily shrugged helplessly. "I don't know. But he's fully aware of whatever's weird between us and I'm grasping at straws."

Sarah saw Gin wasn't going to be any help and inquired, "I didn't think you could travel to the future, only the past."

"Time turners only go to the past, but supposedly there are spells that can go anywhere. And besides you don't have to actually travel to reach the future," Lily said. "All it takes is a magical accident to put you in a fifty year stasis, and in a blink of an eye, it's just like you traveled to the future."

Gin held up a hand after she'd composed herself. "Just to be clear, we're talking about the possibility that Harry is your dad, right?"

"Yes," Lily replied.

"Fantastic," Gin agreed helping herself to a sip of Sarah's ale.

Sarah was still shaking her head distressed at the possibility of dealing with a really hot grandfather. "What led you to this theory?"

Lily shrugged. "I don't know what Harry's hiding, but he takes every opportunity he can to hug me." Lily frowned as she admitted, "And he feels guilty about it."

"So like he missed out on raising you," Sarah concluded. "That's nuts."

Lily sighed. "Yeah, it is. But if you ever watch him, I mean really watch him, you'll see. He acts like he's woken up in a world that looks the same just all the people are brand new."

"Whoa," Gin was impressed. "Deep."

"This is great," Sarah sarcastically bit out while rubbing the bridge of her nose. "Either Harry is my grandfather or somewhere in the range of fifty to a hundred percent female."

Lily chuckled at the simplicity of the summation.

"I wouldn't say that," Gin disagreed.

"You got another theory?" Sarah looked up hopefully.

"No," Gin said with a bright grin. "I just meant that it's not either-or. He could be both."

"I've been thinking."

"And I've been drinking."

Harry glared at his godfather. "Sirius, stop it."

"I can drop it," Sirius agreed.

Harry growled. "Do you really want me to set back your healing?"

"No," Sirius pouted. "That prospect is not very appealing." Sirius saw he was quickly nearing the 'poke-in-the-eye' level of irritation. "Perhaps if you were more revealing? Stop concealing that feeling? Okay I'm done, don't hurt me." Sirius had his arms up to protect himself and added, "Or send me reeling through the ceiling."

Dobby snickered.

"Don't laugh," Harry warned the elf. "We don't want to encourage this sort of behavior."

Sirius grinned at the amused elf. "I've been doing a little thinking too, actually."

"Oh yeah?" Harry looked up. "What have you been thinking?"

"I think," Sirius said. "I think most people don't really appreciate how much more complicated wiping is when you're dealing with a hairy bum."

"Padfoot," Harry grumbled.

"I'm not kidding," Sirius continued. "Girls especially can't comprehend the dynamics necessary to-"

Harry cut him off with a silencing charm. "Dobby, you can stay or go, but if you stay please turn invisible. Sirius can't seem to stop playing to an audience today."

Dobby smiled and snapped his fingers disappearing from view.

Sirius had managed to break the silencing charm and pouted. "Fine, I've been thinking about the thing too."

Harry looked emboldened. "And?"

"And I think if we're going to do something, we're better off sooner than later."

Harry nodded. "Me too. Albus will connect us with the burglaries real soon, if he hasn't already. Our options are just going to get more and more limited."

"You think?" Sirius wondered. "But we're always so slick about making the robberies all quiet and clever. You know, like the opposite of the loud, blunt, and obnoxious public image we've been cultivating."

"Cultivating?" Harry repeated. "You've just been yourself."

"Myself?" Sirius said, choking back the tears. "You don't think I wish I could stop hiding? Treating it like a disease, just because I want to be a dancer?" Sirius did a pirouette and nearly lost his balance.

Harry looked away tiredly. "Padfoot, Dobby's not even listening to you."

Sirius snickered. "Sure he is. I can hear him laughing in the corner."

"Sorry," the invisible elf's voice carried from the corner.

"Invisible and silent, if you stay," Harry said loudly. A snap of elven fingers was the only response Harry received.

"What'll Albus do when he figures it out?" Sirius asked returning to more earnest conversation.

Harry frowned. "Probably not much. He won't approve, but with a supposed greater good of checking Death Eater homes for horcruxes, he'll understand. I'm more concerned with the mystery note fucker."

"Yeah?" Sirius urged Harry to continue.

"He wanted us to get the note with the fake diary," Harry summarized. "Now he may think we got the note and aren't jumping to meet him but he'll probably have to assume that we didn't get it. In which case, he either will leave notes at other horcrux locations -locations we don't know- or he'll try and contact us another way."

"You're not thinking of actually going to the Shrieking Shack?"

"Definitely not," Harry said. "We both need to stay away from there."

"You think we should just wait for him to contact us again?"

Harry bit his lip uncertainly. "Actually, I'm thinking we force him to come to us on our terms."

Sirius perked up. "You think he'll do that?"

Harry warily argued, "I think he'll have to. He can't be certain we got the letter. And if he doesn't show, then it proves his claims of cooperation and an alliance were disingenuous."

"Drawbacks?"

Harry let out a tired breath. "What I'm thinking will clearly alert the Dark Lord that his horcruxes aren't safe."

"He's probably heard about Malfoy's floor vault," Sirius pointed out. "And I doubt he missed the fires from Grindelwald's old bunker either."

"Yeah, I mean I'm almost certain he knows," Harry agreed. "But this will move us up his 'to-kill-painfully' list."

"What are you saying we should do exactly?"

Harry's face was grim as he explained. "Set our own trap with live bait."

"Live? How live?"

"I say we hold a private auction, by invitation only for Ravenclaw's cube, Slytherin's locket, and Hufflepuff's cup."

Sirius' eyes widened in shock. "And just who would we be inviting? I'm doubting an owl to That Fucker will reach him."

Harry shook his head with a smirk. "We're not inviting a single person. We just want the people who'd be crashing this party."

"Yes," Sirius agreed with a manic look in his eyes. "Yes, crashing this party… of doom!"

"What?" Harry was perturbed.

Sirius motioned exaggeratedly. "I thought we were trying to add a little flair to our conversation."

Harry sighed. "Dobby? You have to leave the room. I'm sorry. And Sirius? Stop playing to an audience."

Sirius realized Harry wasn't acting overdramatic, he simply was overdramatic. Sirius saw Harry looked pretty determined too. "So the only people who will understand what we're auctioning are Voldemort and our mystery fucker?"

"Dumbledore will too."

Sirius couldn't think of any better ideas. "You know this may well mark the end of the Death Eater Bandits."

Harry nodded. "With half the horcruxes, we have more to lose than we do to gain by continuing. The ward sets have been getting nastier because they know we're coming."

Sirius nodded having thought similar things. "But we can still make exceptions when opportunities present themselves, right?"

"Absolutely," Harry agreed. "And you know, someday in the future, there will be people, who desperately need to be robbed. And they may not have any tattoos on their arms."

Sirius smiled happily, picturing a bright future. "Very well then," Sirius said as though coming to a grand conclusion. "Let's just see who is interested in," Sirius snapped his head to face Harry, "buying some of this dark bastard's soul!"

"Oh for Merlin's sake," Harry grumbled rubbing his temples as a headache formed. "You've got no audience! Why are you doing this?"

Sirius stood up challengingly. "You're my audience."

"It's my idea," Harry pointed out.

"Yeah but," Sirius argued. "But you're not really saying it with any… panache."

Harry watched his godfather wiggle his hips and began to wonder if Sirius really did want to become a dancer. "You're an idiot."

"No, you're an idiot," Sirius petulantly retorted. "And a drama queen."

Harry looked up dangerously. "Excuse me?"

"Ah-ha," Sirius exclaimed pointing at Harry. "See?"

Harry fought the urge to huff. "You're a poohead."

"No, you're the poohead, poohead."

Harry stopped a beat unsure how to reply to that one. "Are we done now?"

"Yeah, we're done," Sirius agreed. "Poohead."