Stronger Now Than We Ever Were
Welcome to the emotional aftermath of the SG-1 missions to P4X-911 and an official announcement on Cameron Mitchell. Here's chapter 5 ofStronger
Disclaimer: Stargate and its characters do not belong to me. I'm just playing in the Cosmic Sandbox here.
Chapter dedicated to all of my wonderful reviews, especially you regulars who keep coming back! (You know who you are!)
Chapter V: Missing In Action
Two weeks passed. Hope was no longer a commodity that the SGC clung to. SG-1, initially under Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter, had conducted searching missions of P4X-911. From what they could tell, both the Jaffa and Ori soldiers had abandoned the entire planet. One or the other had picked up the corpses of their fallen. And so SG-1 had returned, despondent with their lack of success or even progress in the hunt for Colonel Cameron Mitchell. On the first day after that first week of failed missions, General Jack O'Neill had taken over SG-1 on General Landry's request. Jack was no less distressed by the missing Mitchell than the rest of SG-1, but he was less fatigued by the string of failures and might be able to keep his head above the proverbial tide. Having Jack around helped boost SGC morale and bring the beleaguered team together.
Hank Landry had then talked to his daughter. At first she'd seemed understanding, after all it had only been a few days since Cameron had been missing. He was probably just using standard Escape and Evasion tactics to avoid the enemy and return to the 911 Stargate. Cameron would likely return home in just a short time. But as that week passed and then another, the entire SGC began to lose hope. Hank had reluctantly issued a base-wide address that announced Colonel Cameron Mitchell as Missing In Action. The base stopped all functions for a moment as the shock set in. It had been a very long time since any member of the SGC had been reported as MIA. KIA on the rare occasion, or missing for a few days until they made their way home, but Mitchell was the only MIA in quite a long time.
When Carolyn arrived in his office, Hank's heart really collapsed in his chest. The tears in Carolyn's eyes when he'd told her Cameron was missing had broken his heart, but now that he was officially MIA, she looked completely despondent. Hank immediately felt like that bad guy, though he certainly was not at fault, nor did Carolyn blame him any. He just hated being the bearer of bad news to his only child. What hurt him the most, though, were not the tears. Her face went blank as she collapsed to her knees, tears spilling onto her cheeks. She looked utterly lost, as if part of her had been ripped out and taken away.
----
Teal'c stood stock-still. In his strong hands remained the staff weapon he often engaged Colonel Mitchell with. They'd spend long hours attacking and defending against each other, two warriors locked in mock combat. But now, as Teal'c listened to General Landry report Mitchell as MIA, some part of him was sad. He had never had many friends, but since arriving at the SGC over ten years earlier, he'd made several. Though only more recently, over the last two years, had Teal'c and Mitchell become close friends, Teal'c could still not help but feel sad at the loss of a friend.
A darker, more focused and malevolent emotion took over the large Jaffa. He raised the staff and swung it at a nearby heavy bag. The leather bag exploded in a spray of its insides, spilling debris across the floor. Teal'c roared as he threw the staff. He had not stopped to check on his teammate after defeating the Ba'al Jaffa. He blamed himself for their capture, for leaving Mitchell behind. Teal'c cursed, retrieved the staff, and swiftly broke it over his knee. He tossed the remains of the training weapon at the wall, abandoning the room and stalking off elsewhere.
As a Jaffa, Teal'c had never worried about emotions or how to deal with loss. He simply did not feel those worries and cares until coming to Earth and interacting with the Tau'ri on a daily basis. Their emotions and concerns had become his. Teal'c cursed the weakness in his body as he stalked down the hallways of the SGC. It was his fault that Mitchell was missing, he was sure of it.
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Elsewhere in the SGC, emotions ranged from passive shock and disbelief to the same utter hopelessness felt by Carolyn Lam and Hank Landry. In her private quarters, Samantha Carter collapsed into Jack O'Neill's arms. Her eyes were filled with tears that wouldn't fall, but Jack held her as she shook with sobs. Sam clung to her husband; both glad that she would never have to deal with losing him in Washington but beyond despair with the loss of her old friend. Cameron Mitchell had always been her rock. No matter how bad things seemed to be, he always – more or less – kept his head and had some witty remark or joke to offer. Knowing he was officially missing... well, it felt like a bright star in the universe had winked out.
"Sam," Jack's soft voice brought her back down to reality. He still held her tightly. "It's going to be alright. We might still find him."
Sam glanced up at Jack, not releasing him from her grip. "You're right." She dried her tears, though there was no flicker of hope for her to cling to. There was little doubt in Samantha Carter's mind that Cameron Mitchell was gone. She sat down on the loveseat in her quarters with Jack, content only to be with her husband, and fighting the waves of turmoil over a missing Cameron Mitchell.
----
Daniel Jackson looked up from his array of Ancient runes as the broadcast came over the SGC's speaker system. He glanced at Vala, just across the room and previously occupied with some book of his she had actually found interesting, and shared a hard glance. They both listened to the entirety of the report, though they both knew the outcome. Earlier that day, all of SG-1 had reported their findings – or lack there of – to General Landry. They both knew what was coming. Daniel couldn't take his eyes off Vala as hers filled with liquid. His heart was wrenched and his stomach hurt, like he hadn't eaten in a week or something. His close friend was officially MIA.
He'd always found Vala suffocating, but now that they were together and the news of Cameron Mitchell's official status were reported, they crossed the room together and collapsed into each other's arms. Daniel clung to Vala with all his strength as she did to him. Part of Daniel balked at his own feelings. He knew, looking down at Vala as she cried, that he did not feel nearly as sad as he ought to. His friend and teammates was gone and he felt only loss, no sadness. That realization stirred him and made him feel even worse than just the report could.
Vala abruptly broke off her tears and glanced at him. Her makeup had run and her cheeks were covered in dark lines, smudged and smeared. Her lips still held their earlier pout. He brought his mouth down to hers and pressed it to hers, their lips coming together like they never had before. All the feelings of loss and despair took over them both, but behind the negative emotions, a warmer feeling was the driving force behind their outward affections.
They clung to each other for a long while, both afraid to lose the other. They sat together on the cold floor of Daniel's lab as he tried to stifle her sadness with his embrace. Eventually acceptance overrode their emotions. As they came to terms with Cameron, they slowly came to terms with each other.
"I love you, Daniel," Vala whispered against his cheek.
He leaned back and held her out, scanning her features and searching for honesty. Daniel kissed her, slowly and tentatively, different even from the kiss they'd shared just moments before. "I love you too, Vala."
----
Carolyn Lam blinked her burning eyes. There had been a dull pain in her stomach ever since her father had told her that Cameron hadn't made it back through the Stargate with the rest of SG-1. Now that he was Missing In Action, she felt truly and totally lost. She was in her office, in the SGC infirmary, and was staring at the screen on her desktop computer. Arrayed before her was a stack of medical reports and personnel files that she, as CMO of the SGC, was responsible for. But now, as her heart was breaking, she realized she'd been typing the same line for the last page and a half of document. Carolyn dropped her hands to her sides, lowered her head, and forced her eyes closed. She focused solely on breathing for a long while, not willing herself to do anything beyond it.
The moment past and she opened her eyes once again. They were red and puffy, but she hadn't cried. Her eyes were sore, her chest felt like it was clasped between vice clamps, and her stomach was queasy at best. Carolyn felt terrible and worst, Cameron wouldn't be stopping by today to brighten her afternoon. Cameron wouldn't be coming back at all...
She found her mind replaying their last night together over and over. Every detail of the evening came to her memory, flashes of emotions and feelings shortly behind them. She remembered how Cameron had smelled, the warmth behind his smiles, the strength in his arms as he held her... even the way he snored so lightly that he never woke her, save for when she remained awake only to watch him in the peaceful tranquility of sleep. But the only thing that Carolyn could think now was that she might never experience Cameron ever again.
He can't be really gone...
I apologize for the distinct lact of Cam, but everyone else needed some screen time. It was a chance to explore the motivations and emotions of the other characters (and their relationships), something I intend to do more of as this story grows and matures through the chapters. I hope you all enjoyed it.