Changing Lives

Disclaimer: I don't own anything connecting to the show.

Author's Note: Here is the new chapter. Sorry, I know that I'm rather slow at working (very slow) but I hope you are still interested in it. Thank you for your reviews, I liked them very much and they were really encouraging. Please write more!

And thank you for the flashback idea, RED LIGHTING, I made use of it. I hope you like it.

Chapter 3: The Story

It was in the evening when they left the hospital. In the car Sara gave a call to Grissom to tell him that there was an emergency and that was why she and Warrick couldn't get to the lab that day and process the evidence there. He was surprisingly sypathetic. He also let them to take the night off as they pulled a double shift that day. Sara didn't argued with him. She was exhausted and wanted to spend some time with her daughter.

By the time they reached Sara's apartment, Brenda was fast asleep in the backseat next to her.

"We are here." – Warrick stated while he stopped the car.

Sara looked at the little girl and sighed.

"I don't want to wake her. She is so sweet and she must be very exhausted."

"You don't have to." – He smiled at Sara and got out of the car. He opened the backdoor and carefully lifted Brenda out. – "Now, we can go."

Sara just smiled at him then they walked up to Sara's apartment. When they got to the door Brenda was still sleeping in the arms of Warrick. Sara opened the door and they stepped in.

"Where is her room?" – Warrick asked.

„It's there." – Sara pointed towards the room opposite to the entrance. – „But she is sleeping in my room, actually." – Sara said sheepishly and after she saw Warrick's questioning look she continued. – „She still has nightmare and every night she finally ends up in my bed."

In Sara's room Warrick put Brenda on the bed then stepped behind to let Sara tuck the sleeping girl in. He was amused how natural Sara seemed in this mother role. He watched her as she took off Brenda's shoes then tucked her in. Involuntarily his thoughts shifted to a scene where Sara was doing this to their own little girl. He shook his head to clear his thoughts. He didn't want to go there now, maybe some other time. Now that it turned out that Sara didn't see anyone after all, he felt that he might have a chance.

„Good night, sweetie!" – Sara kissed her daughter's forehead. But just as she began to stand up, Brenda opened her eyes.

„Good night, mommy!" – She said with sleepy eyes then she turned towards Warrick. – „Good night, Warrick!" – With this she was asleep again.

Sara smiled at her partner then they left the room.

„She is a very cute girl." – Warrick said as he closed the door.

„Yeah, she is." – Sara agreed a little bit embarrassed. She felt guilty because she hadn't talked about Brenda earlier. Because of this and because Warrick didn't want to ask such questions which Sara might not want to answer, the silence between them as they stood in front of the closed door became rather awkward. The silence was broken by Warrick's growling stomach. This eased the tension between them as both of them laughed out loud.

„I guess we should eat something. We didn't even eat lunch." – Sara said.

„No. I mean I don't want to disturb you. You must be very tired."

„Yeah, you are right. I'm very tired but I'm more hungry. So let's eat something! Besides, you must have some questions." – With this she walked towards the kitchen with Warrick following her.

„Look! I don't think that any of this would be my business, so you shou…"

„No. It isn't true. You sent the whole afternoon and a great part of the evening in the hospital. You have every right to know what had happened." – Sara said while she was examining the content of her fridge. – „Do not give me that look, Brown. Ask what you want and I will answer." – Warrick smiled at this and Sara continued in a teasing tone after she had managed to find some boxes of Chinese which were left from the previous day. – „If I were you I would make use of this situation. You won't hear this sentence from me again."

„Okey then. Did you adopt her?"

„Yes." – Sara answered while giving one of the boxes to him. – "Although it isn't official yet. But soon it will be. And before you would ask it, yes, this is the reasons why I haven't told anything yet. And I was afraid of your reactions, too." – She said this last part barely audibly, however, Warrick heard it very clear and became rather confused by this statement.

„Why?" – He couldn't understand why Sara would be afraid of their reactions. Usually she wasn't interested in other people's opinion.

„I don't know. I'm just not a mother figure. I have still doubts of my ability as a mother and if I have them, you would also have had them and I'm sure that you wouldn't have kept them for yourselves. And I was not ready to face them. I have many things to fight without them as well." – Sara said tucking into her food.

„Don't say this. What a saw today didn't show me that you are incompetent as a mother. I think that you are wonderful. Brenda loves you and she seems to be very happy with you. This is what is important and not our opinions." – Warrick said reassuringly and took Sara's hand and squeezed it. – „And have faith in yourself!"

„All right, but it isn't so easy, you know. I still remember the day when this adoption idea got into my mind. I almost went crazy.

Sara has been pacing in her apartment for nearly 2 hours. She visited Brenda this afternoon which became a custom of hers lately. Ever since she first visited that little girl whom she had to take care of during the investigation, she went to see her as frequently as she could. She loved that little girl who was left lonely in the world. Maybe this was the first reason why she became so attached to her. And now this affection towards Brenda was the reason why she could stay in one place.

Her brain was at full speed. Brenda's words were still very vivid in her mind. „Somebody wants to adopt me." And if it hadn't been enough, the look of her big blue eyes didn't want to leave her memory, either. „Sara! I was thinking very much." In spite of her present state of emotions, Sara had to smile at the serious tone of the girl. She seemed to be very mature at that moment. But her following words still made her shiver. „I don't want a new family. I want to stay with you." After this statement Sara was speechless. Until that moment it didn't even occur to her to be her mother. She wanted Brenda to be happy in a real family and she knew that she wasn't the one to give it to her. Unfortunately when she tried to explain it to the girl, Brenda took the explanations amiss and when they parted Brenda was sure that Sara didn't love her.

Sara sat down on her sofa and buried her head into her palms. She wanted to cry. She was at loss about what to do. A part of her really wanted Brenda to have a real family, but on the other hand she knew that it was a real miracle that Brenda was willing to talk to her. Brenda didn't speak to anybody except her, not even to the children around her.

Sara finally sighed and leant against the cushions behind her. She was tired. In the last two hours she tried to persuade herself that Brenda would be much happier in a real family. Then when she failed, she tried to persuade herself that she never wanted a child. When she also failed with this, she argued about her incapability as a parent. This was an easy task for her as she had thousands of arguments for this one but somehow finally she always thought of Brenda when she said: „You are my mommy."

„I didn't know what to do." – Sara said as she slowly finished her dinner. – „I almost went nuts."

„But judging the present state I assume that finally you managed to decide." – Warrick said smiling.

„I think that this was the best decision that I have ever made."

„And what about the other parents who wanted to adopt Brenda?"

„Fortunately I know a guy who happens to be influence on such matters and he helped me. I think without him Brenda wouldn't be here." – She answered but hardly had she finished her sentence, she yawned.

„I think this is my clue." – Warrick said smiling while he stood up from the table. „Thanks for the dinner."

„You are welcome. You can always find one or two Chinese boxes half empty in my fridge. Brenda loves it very much but she can't eat the whole. So anytime you carve for a little Chinese you know where you find it." – Sara said jokingly and both of them laughed up.

„I'll keep it in mind. Thanks."

Warrick said goodbye at the door and before he left he bent down and kissed Sara's cheek. Sara smiled at him then watched Warrick walking towards the stairs.

„Warrick!" – She shouted after him. He stopped and turned around. – „Thank you."

Warrick just cast at her his beautiful smile then continued walking. However, Sara stayed at the door still looking at the direction in which Warrick disappeared with a huge grin on her face.

TBC