"…Dear GOD. I was actually beginning to think that I'd survive this week, but after that, I know I can't. A rabbit down my pants…UNFORGIVEABLE."
Here, Boogle Bunny!
Recap: Itachi went to sleep, and Deidara and Tobi put Boogle on him while he was sleeping. Boogle managed to get into Itachi's pants (literally) and that's about it.
Genre: Humor
Disclaimer: Naruto ≠ aBoOm-Un
Author Note: HOLY CRAP AN UPDATE - Erm, I mean…I love you guys? –pummeled with tomatoes-
By aBoOm-Un
Day 2
"Hey, hey. Weasel."
"…"
"Are you even listening to me, un?!"
Itachi visibly twitched, raised the straightening iron tongs up to his slightly-damp hair and clamped down probably a little too hard. Deidara poked the irate man's shoulder-blade, an somewhat annoyed-but-amused expression plastered onto his face.
"Look, if you're still pissed about the rabbit, you don't have to say anything, un," Deidara looked at Itachi in the mirror, and snickered slightly, "Your expression kinda reads it loud and clear."
"I am in my happy place. I am calm, cool, colle-"
"Weasel, un? Hellloooo?"
"-cted, pea-"
"Helllooooooooo?" The blonde poked the other mans shoulder-blade once more, before tugging on a lock of his hair. "You there?"
"…-peaceful, happy. I am a river-"
"EARTH TO WEASEL!" Itachi shuddered violently and dropped the straightening iron as Deidara shouted in his ear, clamping his hands onto Itachi's shoulders and shaking him, "ARE YOU STILL ALIVE, OR DID YOUR WEINER BROTHER SNEAK IN YOUR HEAD AND MAKE YOUR BRAIN IMPLODE, UN?!"
"YOU made my brain implode, Deidara, so go yell at Tobi or something." Itachi resumed straightening his hair, brow furrowing as Deidara huffed slightly and began rambling about Tobi running an errand for Zetsu. Or something.
Despite all that, Deidara turned heel and stalked out the door, a small sigh of relief coming from the Uchiha prodigy.
However, all peace must come to a quick end for Itachi. He's in the Akatsuki, after all. It's where Deidara lives.
"Erm…Weasel? You better come out here, un…"
Itachi's small smile dropped. "Crap."
Walking out the bathroom with only a pair of pants on, (All over the world, many fangirls screamed with happiness) Itachi walked into his bedroom to see Deidara standing by Boogle's hutch, a bland look upon his face. Itachi made a small looping hand gesture and said slowly, "…Yes, Deidara?"
"Boogle is gone, un."
"You're kidding."
"Nope."
Itachi approached the cage, to see that the blonde artist spoke the truth.
"…Well, that's bloody fantastic."
Hearing a tiny thud, Itachi spun around, glaring at the doorway where Boogle sat. She looked up at the two fully-grown men, her black nose twitching slightly, brown eyes watching them intently. Seeing Itachi crack his knuckles, Boogle turned tail and fled the scene.
"There she goes, un!!" Deidara whooped gleefully. Itachi meanwhile, cursed loudly and ran after the fat ball of fur.
( - - - )
"Goddammit." Itachi ran a quick hand through his half-straightened hair, a look of utter annoyance on his face. Kisame walked leisurely beside the fuming young man, a bemused expression upon his face.
"Itachi-san, how does Boogle keep on getting out the hutch? You do remember to close it, right?"
"Of course I remember to shut the damn thing!!" The Mange-Sharingan wielder was getting pissed. That wasn't a good sign. Kisame gulped slightly, taking a slight step away from his partner. He didn't want to oppose Itachi at the moment.
Itachi exhaled deeply, pinching the bridge of his nose as if he had a headache. This really wasn't good for him. But then again, it couldn't get any worse than it was at the moment…
"UCHIHAAAAAA!!!!!"
The pair winced slightly, and Kisame placed a hand on the younger mans shoulder. "You're on your own, Itachi-san."
Oh no, it got a LOT worse.
Managing to make his way to Kakuzu's room, he poked his head through the doorway. "What is it, Kakuzu?" He mentally kicked himself at how pathetic he sounded.
The older man, who was twitching violently, raised his hand. "Does this thing belong to you?!"
Itachi's eyes went wide. Boogle was being held up by the ears, while she made those funny grunting noises. But, that wasn't what he was focused on…
…Because poking slightly out of Boogle's mouth was a ¥10,000 bill.
"…Crap."
"Crap is right, you pathetic piece of it!!" Kakuzu roared, yanking the half-eaten bill out of her mouth. "She ate TEN of those notes, Uchiha!! TEN!!"
Throwing the rabbit towards Itachi, the Sharingan-user barely had time to catch her, because gravity wasn't exactly on her side. But, what shocked Itachi the most was that despite the fact he was holding her, she didn't squirm to get away from him. In fact, she more like buried her head into the crook of Itachi's arm.
Absently, Itachi placed his hand upon her head, and looked Kakuzu straight in the eye. "What do you want me to do about it?
Sucking air in between his teeth, Kakuzu glared hatefully at Itachi and the rabbit. "You will get my money back, OR ELSE." Deciding not to anger him anymore, Itachi simply nodded and quickly walked out of the older mans room, the rabbit still not putting up a fight.
Walking down the hallway, Itachi caught sight of two pairs of eyes peering at him and the rabbit through a slightly-open door. "Deidara, Kisame, stop staring. It's rude."
The stated crept sheepishly out of the room, the Sharkman stating slowly, "…Why is she so calm?"
"Are you like," Deidara snickered, "Mr. Bestiality, un?" Kisame snorted at this, while Itachi frowned.
"Most people who make fun of something like that are hiding their own personal secrets."
Deidara's smile dropped, while the man next to him let out a shout of laughter. "You guys, if you ask me, the rabbit is a good thing. I don't think I've laughed so much in my life!"
Deidara and Itachi turned to stare at the still-snickering Sharkman. Deidara whistled low, "Wow, that's kinda sad, un. You've never laughed harder?"
"For once, I agree with Deidara. That's kinda pathetic." Itachi shrugged slightly.
The two started shaking their heads, while Kisame sweat-dropped slightly. "W-What are you guys on about?"
The blonde made a "Tsk-tsk" noise, and slung his arm around Itachi's shoulder. "Truly pathetic, un."
"Do not touch me, Deidara." Itachi frowned at the artist, who quickly withdrew his arm from around the sociopaths neck. Itachi nodded slightly when Deidara did so, and pressed his pointer finger behind Boogles neck slightly. "Kisame, lets go."
The stated man nodded, while Deidara whistled, "Oi, oi!! What about me, un? Are you guys having a 'party'?" He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, while Itachi looked down at the rabbit and shrugged.
"What the hell."
Kisame picked the rabbit up and threw the poor thing at Deidara's head, hitting him dead on. "Ack!"
The blue-skinned man snickered slightly, while his companion simply smirked at Deidara, who was rubbing his nose gingerly. He looked up at the two and opened his mouth to shout at them, but paused for a bit, and his angry look turned into a grin.
Kisame simply raised an eyebrow. "What's so funny?"
Deidara pointed down the hall. "The rabbit escaped again, un."
The pair stopped smirking, while Deidara hooted. "Catch it if you can, un!!"
Oh she can run, but she can't hide.
Kisame and Itachi sent one look at each other for a split second before sprinting after the fat blob, Kisame grabbing Samehada, Itachi preparing the strongest damn Katon jutsu he knew.
Block Material:D