Chapter 3

Butterflies

A swarm of butterflies fluttered furiously in my stomach. The last time I had heard that exact sound was that night with my one and only since love. It was the same transporting popping noise. I had been trying to not dwell on the thought of me seeing him again. I didn't really know if he'd changed. I didn't know if his innocent smile would still make me melt. Shit, let's face it: I'll secretly die when I see him. Why hadn't he waited for me?

I could hear the footsteps in the hall getting closer. My heart's pace gained rapidly. I dropped the plate that was in my hand into the soapy water that splashed into my face. I jumped and closed my eyes reaching for a dry towel. Calm down. You don't want him to see how affected you are, especially since he won't feel the same about seeing you.

The dreadful knock was finally upon the kitchen door. "Come in!" I didn't turn to see Hermione and… Harry walk in. I just stayed focused on my dishes as I heard both of them talking to each other and decided to wait till they were done talking before I said anything.

When they finally did I turned around and saw that Hermione was right in my face. I jumped. "Shit Mia… You know I hate that." She just laughed along with a manly chuckle that came from behind her.

"Can't handle the face to face?" Harry asked bitterly. There seemed to be an undertone that I was a little shocked to hear. I mean, I had suspected that he didn't want to be with me. I got that. I understood it, resentfully, but it was like… he was angered by me.

I suppose I couldn't get an answer out soon enough for him because he laughed again with another underline. "How've you been?" He came around Hermione to give me an awkward side hug. I still couldn't answer his question, most certainly since he was pressed against me. Seeing him, having him so close to me, made me want to cry, hell I could feel the tears forming in my eyes, but I held them back. I was so very confused. My emotions were almost too unbearable. They all came rushing back in a crashing wave.

I jerked away from Harry's grip. Fuck me, if I'd cry over this or in front of him. I coughed once to clear my throat into my closed fist then whistled for Hedwig. She flew down from her high perch next to my eagle owl and settled onto my still closed fist.

I slowly turned to Harry, looking directly into his eyes, letting all my emotions show, and guess what? I didn't care. I didn't care that he could see right through me like he used to, I wanted him to see it. See how much it hurt me through the years after I had left him, letting him know that I still loved him. "Take her and leave," was all I was able to say without a broken voice. He held his arm out to her and she hopped onto it. Then as I turned around and faced the counter, gripping the edge really hard trying so hard not to cry in front of them, both he and Hermione tried to say something but I held up my hand. "Don't. Just go… please. I'll see you at school," I said with a calm voice as tears silently made there way down my face and onto the counter-top.

I hung my head while Hermione told Harry to meet her in the hall. I couldn't see what was going on but there was hesitance before his answer. "Bye, Dragon…"

My eyes tightened and my grip on the counter caused the wood to creak just from hearing my old nickname. Why was he doing this? Why was he using the nickname that he called me on that one night so long ago? Hearing that slashed another hole into my heart, right next to the one that was made the day I left him.

The soft footsteps and quiet click of the door shutting was the indication that he had finally left. That's when I really broke down. I didn't know if he could hear me or not but I didn't care. Hermione was suddenly behind me; her hands were snaking from my sides to my lower stomach. She laid her head on my shoulder. "Are you going to be okay love?"

I didn't want to hear anything comforting that she had to say. I didn't want to hear anything like that from anybody… except from Harry. I wanted to hear things that would help me feel better from sweet lips of his. I turned around in her arms and lightly but firmly pushed her back. I looked her in the eyes, "I don't think I can do this right now."

She just looked at me sadly. "I didn't mean… I just wanted to help. I-I-I know that you still like him and that I'm like a substitute…" I looked at her then, tears still streaming down my face along with a shocked look. We both know that that it wasn't the case. "… I'll just go then…"

When she turned to walk out the door I grabbed her wrist lightly and turned her to face me. "That's not true Mia, please don't leave me. Tell Harry to go… but I don't want to be alo-"

I was cut off with her lips pressing against mine and all too soon we broke apart and she walked out of the door with out looking back. I dropped to the floor then and felt like I couldn't even breathe, like someone punched me.

I stopped my sobs so I could hear soft talking on the other side of the door and footsteps leaving. I let out a sob then because my Mia had left along with my lover.

I cried and cried until I felt a pair of hands on my shoulders and then I was wrapped in them. They were warm and manly. I tried to push the person off but they wouldn't budge, so I ended up clinging to them while they whispered in my ear. "It's alright… I'm here Dragon."

I almost choked when I finally realized what person that was holding me… "…Harry? Why are you here? Where's Mia?" When he didn't answer I snuggled closer to him, afraid that he would leave me… just like I left him and I didn't want that to happen.

I melted into his arms, against his body. Although we had one time together, I knew his body well. It had been the only thing I could think of. Sadly, even when I was with Mia, it was his body I wished I was with more.

So close to him made the tears run even more. When I had pictured our reunion over in my head a million different ways, this is not a way I had imagined. It seemed wrong. Mia was part of the story now. Even though my love for Harry was far greater, this feeling of losing her sent a shard of pain threw the heart I had thought was lost forever. Why was I feeling like this?

I then realized that even though my heart did not beat for her, it beat once again because of her. She woke me from my numbed being. How could not have seen it before? Even though I despised her for not being the man I loved… she truly was my reason for feeling. I guess I loved her more than I knew.

So now… what was going to happen? Was I just going to forget Mia just because I have my lover again? I didn't want to lose her friendship, or her love for that matter. I've been dating her for a year now and just as Harry came back in my life, I lose her?

I buried my face in his neck and took in his scent. The smell of him chased back the thought of Mia, and that's what I wanted …. For now. All I could feel was a sorrow-filled joy. He was back. I didn't care for how long, because right now… he was in my arms. He was with me at this very moment. I pulled back to look into his deep green eyes. 'How beautiful' I thought, 'His lips look softer than ever'. I wanted to touch them and I suppose Harry knew what I was thinking. He leaned in slightly, as is afraid that he might have guessed wrong. Before I knew it, I smashed into his lips.

It was the most wonderful feeling, his lips on mine again. I had missed this so much that it was a constant ache in my side. His lips made my body tingle all over and I couldn't breathe.

When I pulled back to look back into his eyes I found out why I had lost my breath. We were in my room. I smiled. "Take me," I whispered. "Please."

I had been waiting too long for this. And now I was aching in more than one place. I had grown and was now swollen with such need that I almost burst from the smallest brush of his against mine.

Next thing I knew we were both without clothes. I blushed, not intending to, and he laughed. "Really Drake, I thought you'd know what I looked like?"

It all seemed to be happening so fast I didn't even really have time to admire him… to take another long moment to remember the small changes his body had made. The more filled out he was. The more muscular he had become. The small dragon tattoo on his chest that I noticed, started to move. It was amazing how little control I had over myself.

I didn't speak. I just reached around his back and pulled his body close and tight to mine. He was also swollen and ready. We both shivered in each other's arms. He looked at me with a sad smile as he said, "It's been a while."

I felt I had to tell him. I leaned in close because I could not say it loudly. My heart would break if I could hear my own words. "I never stopped loving you." My mouth was torn from his ear as my head was thrown back and a gasp escaped my hungry lips by his mouth on my neck. The sweet kisses and bites had me shivering harder.

"Me either," he had finally replied. My heart burst. I slammed him up against the nearest wall.

"Then why!" I spun him around with his face pressed against the wall. I threw his hands up over his head. He left his arms upright as my fingers trailed down from his over his forearms and shoulders and finally back. "Why didn't you wait!"

I pushed inside of him hard. He moaned loudly, his head rolled back onto my shoulder with his mouth by my ear. The musical sound kept my thrusting harder and harder; harder than I had ever in my entire life.

He continued to moan and call my name, his hand wrapped around the back of my neck. I pressed against him even tighter, pinning him tightly against the wall, knowing the pressure on his swollen desire was building and making his moans louder and louder.

I was about to explode so I pulled away, and turned his body around. "Why?"

He fiercely pushed me down to the ground. I was pinned and I couldn't get up. He held me down with such strength. At first I thought I had made him angry, but then I felt him, I felt him enter. I bit my lip trying not scream from the pain and pleasure of my real first time, the time before it was me doing him.

He bent his head next to mine as he thrusted with the same passion as I had and said, "Because I thought you didn't want me! Why did you leave?"

Harder and harder he pushed and pulled. In and out. My mind was exploding. I could feel nothing else but him inside of me. It was wonderful, this feeling. I wanted nothing else than for this to last forever.

But then it grew, the build up. I could feel it. I wasn't going to be able to last much longer. I cried out as it took me over and my lover cried the same time as I.

He collapsed on top of me. Both of us were trying to relearn how to breathe. Our sweat mingled. And before I had known it, before I could answer him… I lost consciousness.