First of all, thank you to Allen Pitt, PrueAndyForever, and AlwaysPiper for your wonderful reviews! Both Primrose and I are thrilled that you like it so far! And thank you also to PrueAndyForever for putting an alert on this story. That means a great deal to us, too! Here's more!

PART FOUR: "Why couldn't I save her..."

Meanwhile, Leo sat in his favorite thinking-spot high atop the Golden Gate Bridge, in deep despair. As he stared out across the water, all he could think of was Piper and the fact that he would never get a chance to hold his soulmate again until she decided to be reincarnated and live another life. But he'd have to wait until she grew up, like he did this time. He'd hate to have to wait that long again.

Looking down at the San Francisco Bay, words came unbidden to his mind. Let go. Just let go. Drop into the Bay and don't even try to come back up. Ending this existence forever would be easier than trying to live forever without Piper.

But sighing resignedly, Leo knew he couldn't do that, as tempting as it was. Trying to kill himself wouldn't end his existence, much as he wished it would--it would only turn him into a darklighter. That would make a mockery out of everything Piper died for. I can't do that to her memory. I won't.

Instead he considered another possibility. Without even thinking about it, his mind slipped back in time, to the day when Piper first found out his secret:

Start Flashback (Episode 1.21 Love Hurts)

Piper: So if Daisy's a whitelighter-to-be, doesn't that mean you used to be...

Leo: Human? Yes, it does. I was actually born right here in San Francisco. I had lived here all the way up till I went off to the war.

Piper: You mean, like Vietnam?

Leo: No. World War II. I left med school and enlisted as a medic. I wanted to help save people, not shoot them. The last thing I remember, I was bandaging a soldier's head wound and I felt a sharp pain and the next thing I know I was floating surrounded by whitelighters. They offered me immortality and the chance to help special people like you. I never once ever doubted that I didn't make the right choice. Til I met you. Ever since all I can think is how I'd give it up and have a mortal life again to have a family, grow old...with you.

Piper: Is that possible?

Leo: Yeah, I can become human again, Piper, if you want me to.

Piper: Are you kidding? I want that more than anything. I don't want to lose you again.

Leo: But...

Piper: But then you wouldn't be able to help other witches or other future whitelighters, would you? You couldn't help save the next Daisy.

End Flashback

Oh, how I wish Piper had taken me up on my offer; how I wish she had decided to give up her powers as a witch, too, so we could've had that chance to grow old together and have kids together without the fear of evil villains going after them, since we both would've never subjected our children to that. Due to her selflessness, that will never be.

Without wanting to, he remembered the scene he watched from Up There, the scene he wasn't supposed to watch, but one he had to watch:

Start Flashback (Episode 2.12 Awakened)

Prue: When we did the spell, we must have awakened everything in the room including the disease.

Phoebe: So, do you think there's anything different about our blood because we're witches?

Prue: I don't know but our first priority is to figure out how to help save these people.

Phoebe: Yeah, but even if we can find a spell to save them, how do we prevent it from spreading to other people.

Piper: You have to reverse the spell.

Phoebe: No, Piper, we can't reverse the spell because…

Prue: You could go back into a coma, you could die.

Piper: I'm not gonna die. Just reverse the spell and call Leo so he can heal me.

Phoebe: Leo? I thought you didn't want us to call Leo.

Piper: Well, yeah, that's when I thought I was sick, not dying.

Prue: Piper, um, we already talked to Leo, he's not allowed to help.

Phoebe: They won't let him.

Piper: Oh. Great. Well thanks for doing something I specifically asked you not to do.

Phoebe: Piper, you just said…

Prue: Phoebe, give it a rest. Um, look, Piper, we don't know the reversal spell anyway.

Phoebe: Yeah, and they won't let us outta here to get it.

Piper: Prue can get it.

Prue: No, I can't. Okay, I can not just astral project on command. I can't control it like that.

Piper: You can learn to control it just like you learned to control your other power. Just concentrate.

Prue: Piper, I can't and I won't.

Piper: Prue, you have to try. We can't let anybody else die.

(Prue shuts her eyes and tries to astral project. She appears in the attic. A nurse looks in the room and sees Prue standing still with her eyes closed.)

Nurse: (through the intercom) What's wrong with her?

Phoebe: Nothing. She's fine.

[Cut to the attic. Prue finds the spell and tries to remember it. She astral projects back into her body.

Prue: Whoa.

Piper: Did you see it?

Prue: Yeah, Piper, I don't…

Piper: Prue, we've already discussed this. For some reason there's no magical out for me but there is for the others. Please.

End Flashback

I saved her that time. Why couldn't I save her this time?

And yet, that's a possibility. I could tell the Elders that I no longer want to be a whitelighter but want to clip my wings and be mortal again. Then when I'd die, I'd get a chance to be with Piper again, get a chance to be reincarnated again, this time with her, like we were the last time, and maybe get the chance to have that normal life we didn't get to have this time. Certainly she has earned that chance. Certainly I have.

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