Author's Note: So I guess FF.N deleted my chapter. Wierd. I don't know. Well, anyway, here it is again. The next chapter will be up...soonish...Thanks to everyone who has reviewed! You guys have been really great. :D
"As you all know, Ryan is coming down from Corporate today to visit our humble branch," Michael smiled brightly. "My prodigal son is coming home."
Jim gave Pam a look, and she tried not to giggle. Dwight had been glancing sidelong at Angela every few minutes or so, but she pointedly ignored him. Kelly sat in the back, filing her nails and trying not to look nervous. Not that she was nervous. She so wasn't nervous. She was the opposite of nervous, whatever that was. Un-nervous? That wasn't it. Well, whatever.
Michael dismissed them and Kelly hurried back to her seat. She pulled out her compact to check her lip gloss for the third time. Not that she was even going to look in his direction. But if she happened to, he would totally notice that she looked super awesome today. Because she definitely did.
Ryan checked his reflection in his rearview mirror one last time. Every hair was perfectly in place, and he tried to comb his beard over the slightly patchy spots. He straightened his tie one last time and locked the Sebring, double-checking to make sure he had the notes for his presentation. He closed his eyes on the elevator ride up and repeated to himself that he was Vice President now. Michael was his subordinate. The thought made him smile a little.
The elevator and his Blackberry dinged at the same time, and he strode into the office, poking away at the tiny keys. Pam noticed him first, of course.
"Hey Ryan," she said, but he held up a finger. He was sure that this couldn't wait. He scanned through the messages twice. Just some stupid forwards that he deleted without reading. Damn.
"Hey Pam," He finally looked up. "Is Michael around?"
"In his office," Pam said flatly, not bothering to meet his eyes. I wonder what's up with her, he thought as he knocked on Michael's door.
The meeting was totally boring, and Kelly stopped paying attention halfway through. She'd sat in the back, as usual, hands in the kangaroo pocket of her glittery black and hot pink hoodie. She was totally tired of wearing hoodies, but they were the only thing that really covered anything anymore. And even they were getting a little tighter every day.
She'd managed to avoid meeting his eyes throughout the meeting so far, and she was totally proud of that. She knew exactly when his eyes were about to settle on her, and she tried to appear like her nails were oh-so-totally fascinating then. But she was still drawn to back to him; she couldn't help it. Even if he looked like he was on the way to a funeral in all that black, she kept watching his blue eyes flit across the room to each person, looking for their reactions. His eyes were always so pretty. She had wrinkled her nose a little when she'd saw his beard ('totally gross' was her initial reaction, and she'd definitely noticed the patchy spots.) But as she watched him, she started to think it suited this new Ryan. He was still cold, indifferent, and a total ass, but he was a Corporate ass now, and he intended on making sure everyone knew it. I mean, sending Michael for water? Come on.
She'd sunk into line with everyone else as they left, hiding behind Kevin as she passed him. She was almost positive he hadn't even looked for her as she went by.
The presentation had gone as well as possible, Ryan thought, considering the people involved. He was sitting in between Oscar and Angela's desks, telling Kevin, Oscar and Andy about how amazing New York was. He recounted a little loudly how he'd run into Vince Vaughn to the both of them, and they laughed in all the right places. He glanced over to the annex to see if Kelly had heard, but she'd just turned another page in some magazine.
Michael, of course, had come over to see what all the fuss was about. He'd dragged Ryan back to his office to 'talk' to him about Dunder Mifflin Infinity, and Ryan peeked back at Kelly, but she hadn't moved.
"Hey," Pam said as she sat down at Ryan's old desk behind Kelly. Kelly smiled and closed her Baby Couture. "You doing okay?"
"Oh totally," Kelly said enthusiastically. "He looks totally dumb in black, doesn't he? Like he's in mourning or something."
"Kelly…"
"I'm fine, Pam. I promise." She shoved the magazine onto Pam's lap. "Look at this! Isn't this pink leather diaper bag totally hot?"
Phyllis knocked softly on the divider just then. "Hey, Kelly. I was wondering what colors you were wanting for those baby booties?"
Kelly looked up. "Oh pink and purple definitely. Those would be totally awesome."
"So you're having a girl?" Phyllis asked, excited.
"Yup," Kelly smiled.
"She doesn't know yet," Pam said, and Kelly rolled her eyes.
"It's totally a girl. And thanks so much, Phyllis."
"It's the least I can do," Phyllis said softly. "After all, babies can be really expensive."
Ryan had finally wriggled his way out of Michael's inane argument that it was "just business as usual, right?" Definitely not, Ryan had replied, and left the room. He walked into the men's bathroom and scrubbed his face with his hands, staring at his reflection above the sink.
She hadn't even looked at him. Just stared at her nails and seemed bored the entire time, and Ryan was thinking, maybe she really had moved on. Maybe she didn't have trouble falling asleep at night. Maybe it was just him that dreamed of soft skin between the sheets, of kisses covering his face and squeals so high that only dogs could hear them. Maybe she didn't feel the silence seeping through the dark and into her ears, so loud that she couldn't stand it.
"Dammit Ryan," he told his reflection. What the hell was wrong with him? When did he start having trouble breathing when she smiled? When did he start imagining her inane conversations just to keep away the silence for a little while? When had he started caring?
"I'll talk to her." He said to himself. "Everything is fine."
Pam and Phyllis were chatting with her when he'd started toward the annex. He could see her smiling through the break in the partition, hands in the pocket of her sweater that looked two sizes too big. She hates hoodies, he thought absently. She looked perfectly happy talking to the two of them, hadn't even noticed he was standing ten feet away. He thought briefly of ordering the other two back to work, because he could do that now, if he wanted. Then he realized he didn't want her to think he was a dick, bossing people around at his whim. Not that she didn't think so already.
He watched as she smiled and handed Phyllis a magazine, pointing out something inside. She did that thing with her hands, talking animatedly and flinging them in every direction. She was sitting on the edge of her desk, legs swinging beneath her skirt. He stared at her thin, brown legs, perfectly manicured toenails.
Phyllis said something to her, and she laughed. She jumped off the desk and started to tug off her sweater. Her shirt lifted up a little, exposing her stomach, and his heart seized. He couldn't move. She twirled around in her purple skirt, laughing, but all he could see was her round belly, much too big for her frame. All he could think was this isn't happening over and over. He had to get out of here.
She saw him then, saw him gazing at her stomach, saw the look of alarm on his face. He started walking toward the exit but she grabbed his arm in front of reception. Made him face her. He stared at his shoes and wondered if he was going to throw up.
"Look at me Ryan," she said. "God dammit. Look at me." He studied her warm brown eyes. They were soft and warm just like the rest of her.
"Why didn't you tell me, Kelly?" His voice sounded so far away. "Why?"
She was silent.
"How could this happen?" His mind was buzzing. "How in the hell could this happen? Did you forget again, Kelly? I thought—I thought…" God dammit. He was pulling his hair and trying to think.
"I knew it," She said. She looked at him, disgusted. "Do you want to know why I didn't tell you, Ryan Howard?" Her voice was louder. Everyone was looking but he couldn't bring himself to care. "Do you want to know why I didn't fucking tell you?" She poked him hard in the chest and it hurt. "Because I knew you would blame it on me. I knew it. You always do. You know what? You think I didn't show up at Alfredo's that night? I was there. And I heard what you said to whoever that was on the phone. I know what you think. About me. About our baby." There were tears in her eyes. "You never wanted anything to do with me and I know it now. I think I always did. So fuck you. Fuck you." The tears were streaming down her face and she turned to Pam and Jim, standing a few steps away. She sobbed into Pam's shoulder, and Jim was patting her back.
They were all staring at him, every damn person in that office was staring at him. Even Michael was leaning out the door of the office, a look of shock on his face. "Wow," he said. "Talk about Days of Our Lives."
"Shut the hell up, Michael." Ryan managed. He stared at Kelly's back, trying to think of what to say. He wanted to reach out and touch her, wanted to be the one to hold her, wanted to get out of this office and outside where he could actually breathe.
"That's not true, Kelly." He whispered.
"Maybe you should leave," Jim said, staring him down. It wasn't a question.
Ryan stood there for a long time before he broke Jim's gaze. He grabbed his coat and didn't bother to wait for the elevator. He tromped down the stairs and got into the Sebring. But he didn't start it.
