Disclaimer: Maria Frank belongs to me. John Munch belongs to Law and Order: SVU.

Chapter 3: Unwanted Decisions

Throughout the late afternoon and night, Maria woke up from her dreams frightening her awake. Sitting upright, the blankets gathered on her lap, she gently stroked John's hair. His arms were wrapped around her, his cheek resting against her stomach. "This is going to be a long night," She whispered, feeling his finger tips trace her spine.

Without warning, he unwrapped his arms from her, sat up and pulled the covers off of himself. "I'll be right back." She watched as he walked to the bathroom and rummaged around for something. Not knowing what he was doing, she laid back down and rested her head against the pillow. Frank took a few deep breaths before he came back, with a wet washcloth in his hand. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he reached over and pulled her to him. "C'mere and roll over. Face me." Rolling over, she faced his chest as he placed the cloth on the back of her neck. The semi-cold water felt cool enough that even the chills were comforting. Closing her eyes, she let out a small sigh and felt herself drifting off again. Seeing her drifting off, John kissed her temple, thankful that she was finally getting some sleep. This is not how I planned our day off.

M*M*M*M*M*M*M

The next morning, Maria dragged herself into the Homicide station house. Slipping into her chair, she picked up the usual paperwork that had gathered during the night. As she started sorting through it, Al Giardello stepped out of his office, requesting her. "Just got word from your captain. I really hate to tell you this, but another family was found murdered." Maria felt her face loose all color and her stomach drop. "He would like for you to come back, as one detective had to be let go. But he said that it's your decision."

She tried to rattle what he had said. She could decided to go back early or stay for her last months. In her professional mind, she wanted to go back and catch the SOB. But in her unprofessional mind, she wanted to stay with John. She loved him and her job. God. This shouldn't be a hard decision. Why am I thinking against going back? Looking back up at Gee, she managed to find her voice. "I'll get to you at the end of the day with my decision, sir." She left the office, not seeing Gee nod to her.

Time seemed to stand still. Maria was signing papers but her mind was fighting over that decision. By mid afternoon, while everyone was gone for lunch, Maria could only stare at her desk. She felt sick to her stomach, but then again, she hadn't eaten anything all day. Feeling a presence next to her, she looked up to see John standing there, a cup of hot coffee held out to her. Taking it, she finished it in only a few sips, feeling a little better, but Alex's grumbling stomach proved her point. "Come on. Let's get something in both of you." John murmured, slipping his hand under her arm, helping her up. Sighing, she let him take them to The Waterfront for food and alone time to talk in the back office. Sitting in the office chair, Maria could only keep thinking about the hell the past cases were going through.

"Sweetie?" Her head snapped up as he placed his hand on her wrist. "What did Gee want to talk to you about?" She clenched her teeth together before opening her mouth.

"Another family was found butchered. My captain wants me to return, but it's my decision. I can go back early or stay here and finish my time."

Placing a soda can in front of her to drink, he asked, "What do you want to do?"

"In my profession opinion, I have to. But, in my unprofessional mind, I don't want to leave...," She stumbled a little and looked away, "you." He leaned forward, barely able to hear that last word. "But I don't want to leave my fellow colleagues to deal with that nightmare. I had promised my cases that I would protect them during their cases. Now, they're probably wondering why I'm not protecting them now."

"Look," John leaned on his elbows, getting close to her face. "Whatever you decide, I will be there. I haven't hung you out to dry and I will never do that." His serious tone made her look up and see the serious look on his face. He was not frowning in the eyes, but his mouth was in a downward angle. She did trust what he was saying to her. "I didn't leave you alone after you first came to help with that little girl and I'm not going to leave you alone to suffer in silence over this."

"I know you won't." She took a hold of his hands. "I'm...going to have to go back, in a few weeks time." She struggled to get that last sentence out, seeing his eyes lower, sadness clouded them.

"I understand. I really do." He whispered, struggling to keep his voice from shaking.

She couldn't stand seeing him crumble. Having been twice divorced and many girlfriends, he had met someone who loved him as a human and not as a check book. Now, his one true person had to leave. "John, please don't cry. I'm so sorry, but I have to. It's my job." He looked up too see her face etched in concern. "Tonight, stop off at my place, so I can get some clothes and we can go to your place. Just you and me tonight." She squeezed his hand, trying to get him to cheer up a little. A small smile formed on his mouth as he knew what she was talking about. "There's that smile I love so much," She whispered, feeling his hand squeeze hers in return.

"Is it what I have on my mind?" He hinted as he leaned even closer, brushing his lips against hers.

Grinning and slightly nodding, Maria connected their lips together and held him close. Sighing softly against his touch, she could feel the chair she was sitting in shift slightly from John's weight as he inched closer. They both knew doing what they were doing wasn't right in case they were caught, but it felt so right. Placing her hand on his chest and pushing him back a little, she sadly looked up the only man she ever really cared about. "I'm so sorry, but I promise I'll make it up to you until I leave."

"Alright, but we should get back before Gee starts to wonder." He said softly as he put the trash into the can and herded her out, locking the door behind him.

To be continued...