Disclaimer: Maria Frank is my creation. John Munch belongs to Law and Order: SVU. Adult content involved.

chapter 4: Needing the Feeling

The day passed by slowly and didn't seem to end until Al told them to go home. Stepping outside in the night air, Maria let out a long held sigh before following John to his car. At her place, she ran up the stairs, grabbed a change of clothes, leaving all needs for Alex and jogged back to John's car.

"Is he going to be alright?" Asked John as he turned a corner, heading in the direction of his apartment.

Maria nodded her head and answered, "I've done it before. He'll be perfectly fine. He knows what to do with the newspapers I left on the floor for him." Once arriving at his place, Maria pressed him up against the wall, trapping his arms under her weight. Staring deep into his eyes, she found the right words to say to him. "I'm sorry about earlier today and yesterday. It's one of my fears that if I show my emotions, I'll get hurt. I'm not a cold person, really." She could feel him wiggle his arms free and wrapped them around her. She loved being in his strong arms.

"I never thought of you as a cold person, but I don't want you to think about that right now. Just us. You know that I want to take that pain from you and let me feel what you want to feel." He whispered as he dipped his head, brushing his lips against hers. "I love you," He murmured against her mouth, pulling her closer. Maria raised her head a little more, brushing her tongue against his lips, asking for entrance. Loving how this was going, John opened his mouth and reached beside him, opening the door to the bedroom. He pulled her in, dropped her bag of clothes by the door and closed it.

"You sure about this?" He asked, making sure that she was positive.

Her eyes roamed over him before reaching forward, pulling at his tie. "Damn sure. Now, strip. This is a no clothes area." Her smile covered her exhaustion as he stripped in front of her, showing a dangerous smile. She lifted her shirt over her head and undid her jeans, not moving her eyes from his. When she reached down to remove the last piece of clothing, John gently tackled her to the bed. Nipping at her neck, he could feel her arch her back against him. Her nails dug into his back as his hands brushed her breasts, causing her nipples to react under his touch.

"John." She gasped out his name, wanting to feel him closer to her. He looked into her eyes and sat up, pulling at the one piece of clothing keeping them apart. Lifting her hips, he pulled them off, kissing the inside of her thigh before sitting up again. Straddling her hips, he bent down and kissed her stomach, hearing her give a small gasp.

Feeling her hand comb through his hair, he lifted his head, seeing her smiling face. "What?" He smiled back at her, feeling her wiggle a little under him.

"Just a little ticklish. You know that." She whispered, continuing to comb his hair with her fingers.

"Well," He moved himself over her, looking her in the face "I can take care of that." He dipped his head, pressing his lips to hers hard. Gasping into his mouth, she felt him run his hands over her hips, his nails dragging over her skin.

She couldn't take it anymore and wanting to feel more. "Please," She pleaded as he moved to kiss the hollow of her neck.

Kissing along her shoulder, he reached into his bedside table and pulled out a condom. He was going to proceed to put in on himself, but she grabbed it from his hand and ripped it open it her teeth slowly. Resting his head against her neck, he let her put in on him herself. Rolling it on, she could feel him release a moan against her neck, causing chills to shudder down her spine. Kissing his neck he sat back up and lifted her hips just a little and positioned himself at her entrance, waiting for her approval. Nodding, he penetrated her slowly, feeling her pull him back down on top of her.

Feeling her breathing steadying, he pulled back just enough to look her in the eyes, letting her get used to his presence. She lifted her head to claim his lips, allowing him to start moving over her. She clamped down on him, as if she wanted him to move a little harder. From the expression he showed, she knew it was the right move.

"You're more welcoming to me doing this then the other women in my life." He panted as she kissed at his neck, forcing him to close his eyes.

"You know we don't talk about them when we're having fun," She whispered in his ear, hearing him gasp as she pulled him closer to herself. Bracing her feet against the mattress, Maria allowed him to slip a pillow under her, feeling a new wave of pleasure roll through her. "Oh, God." She murmured into his neck.

"I love you, Maria." John gasped, seconds before he couldn't stop himself and climaxed.

Maria followed quickly after. "I know. I love you, too." She panted, searching for his mouth for them to kiss.

Parting their lips a few minutes later, he rolled on his side, stroking her hair out of the way of her eyes. "You're so beautiful. I bet you know that as well." He whispered.

Smiling, Frank reached out and caressed his face gently, basking in the glow after being together. "And you are unbelievable handsome, but you know that." He smiled and felt his face go slightly red. "Can't believe that still makes you blush, silly." She remarked as her eyes watched him slowly get up and head to the bathroom.

Coming back after a few minutes, he laid down beside her and held her close to his chest. "I...know you have to go back, but...," He struggled to find his words for a minute. "But, I love you too much to let you go so easily." Maria laid in silence against him and placed her hand on his bare chest, feeling his heart pounding under her fingers. "You're the greatest thing to happen to me and...," He closed his eyes, fighting his emotions.

"Shhh," She placed her fingers against his lips and touched his face with her other hand. "Oh, John. It's okay to show your sadness and fear of me leaving. I seriously don't want to leave you either, love." He opened his tear filled eyes and stared at her. "I don't want to, but we both know I have to. I'm so sorry about everything up to this point that is causing you emotional pain."

Placing his hand over the one on his face, he pressed his forehead against her's and openly cried. He couldn't hold it in anymore and allowed himself to cry against the one woman he loved until there was nothing left.

Laying him back down twenty minutes later, Maria Frank ran her fingers through his hair until he was fully asleep from emotional exhaustion. "I love you John and I don't want you to forget that." Instead of laying down with him, she stayed up and watched him sleep as peacefully as he could. "I love you so much."

To be continued...