Redivivus

Disclaimer- I do not own 'Holes', it belongs to Louis Sachar.

Summary – Seventeen year old Squid makes a transition from juvenile delinquent into murderer, and only the sister of the victim can give him the chance of redemption.

Warning! – Mild swearing.

Author's Note – Sorry for the late update! Oh, and I would like to dedicate this chapter to my two trusty reviewers, Horsesareamazing and HuNkYcHuNkYmOnKeY97030!

Horsesareamazing – Thanks so much for taking your time to review! I am glad you like the story, hope you read on.

HuNkYcHuNkYmOnKeY97030 – I was a tad unsure whether I could stretch his character to commit murder but hopefully it was convincing. I am so happy that you are enjoying my story, I really appreciate that you took your time to review.

Chapter Five

"Abandoning My Chains For Life"

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The silence was stomach-turning. Squid watched as April rested her head in her hands; it was a position he had encountered many times before. When he was at school there used to be a girl who sat in front of him, he knew she came from a very wealthy background, with the designer labels which he despised; mostly due to the fact his mother didn't earn enough. This girl was relatively pretty, long auburn hair with sharp features and full lips, and even though he couldn't explain it, Squid disliked her – even hated her. He used to pick jokes about her weight, even though he knew her weight was normal, but he did it anyway and even used t take pleasure when she would come in looking like a scarecrow weeks later, her features now looking more blunt and sunken. He used to watch and laugh as she too allowed her hollow gaunt cheek to rest in her palm. He wasn't sure why he had thought of her – he couldn't really remember her name, but maybe it was the power he realized he had; he had made a perfectly pretty girl turn to dust with a few simple words.

"I wish I could just leave." Her voice was forceful and as he looked up he could still see the faint scratch marks down her face, embossed into her skin like a brand.

"Why don't you then," he scoffed "I 'aint gonna' stop you," he sneered, his words laced with a harsh edge he wished would evaporate. He watched as she subconsciously grazed her forefinger along a particularly deep scratch down her cheek and rubbed the skin delicately. He momentarily wondered if it hurt much, but quickly brushed the thought away.

"You don't wear the chains I do," she mumbled, eyes averted toward the floor. Squid cocked an eyebrow and snorted. Her eyes flicked upward and looked at him, puddles of disappointment staring at him – through him. He looked at the ticket tucked beneath her fingers, and wondered whether he should have even showed the damn thing to her. "I am trapped in this place – I don't think you realize it yet, but you're here as well, locked in here with me." Squid looked directly at her and could see her emotions bleeding from her, it was sickening, so pathetic. Turning away he let out a short chuckle; cruel and harsh.

"Of course we are fucking locked in here; it's a prison," he replied smugly, not wanting to see her face, but in the end turned to see her face buried in her hands. She quickly sat up, brushing away her grimy hair from her face, looking him in the eye. "What happened to your face?" He hadn't realized how nasty the comment was until it had left his lips. Her hand immediately went to her face and her finger touched the deep cuts across her face.

"It was me," she admitted eyes still on him, refusing to look away in shame, Squid quirked an eyebrow and felt his chest compress. Clearing the bile rising in his throat, Squid's facial features softened.

"Why would you do that to yourself?" he asked, watching her eyes flicker away from his suddenly cutting off her thoughts. Her pale fingers clasped tightly at the ticket on the table and squeezed it as if for support, like a child squeezing their mother's hand while getting an injection.

"It doesn't matter," She dismissed quietly. Squid noticed that the deep cuts looked partially healed.

"When?" he asked and the one single word rebounded off the plain walls and echoed in his own head, stifling in the eerie silence. The girl's eyes closed briefly but reopened revealing her large glassy eyes.

"Please – stop," her pleas struck something in his chest causing his chest to tighten. Gulping hard, Squid pushed his fingertips against the glass.

"Everyone dies, you know that, so why can't you accept it?" he spat, his nails scratching the glass, not leaving a mark. "Go and fucking get on with your life!" April's jaw tightened and as she tilted her face upwards he noted the deep scratches on her neck.

"Everyone just expects you to carry on where you left off; they don't understand that you're not living everyday in the prospect of looking forward to something – it's just another less day to live with the pain; another less day to live without him." Squid shook his head, and his eyes narrowed, and though he couldn't explain it anger had began to rise within him.

"I'm not gonna' give you pity, I'm not some damned sheep like the rest of 'em. Have you ever noticed that when something good happens to a person, other people shun it due to jealousy? But as soon as somethin' bad happens, they all pretend to be part of it 'I was his best friend!', all these fucking phonies juicing it for what it's worth. They won't say it, but they cling to you, and pretend feel sorry for you because of one thing – it's that thing gleaming in their eyes; it's fucking gratitude that it didn't happen to them." Squid looked up at her and saw she was frowning, with more sorrow than anger he decided.

"So what does that mean?" she asked softly, confusion fluttering on her features "Does it mean that you wish it would happen to you?" Squid's stare was squared with hers as if daring her to look away, but her eyes kept on his as he opened his dry, chapped lips.

"It means that I want a label for my misery."

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She hadn't visited him in weeks, and although Squid knew he should have been grateful, he almost wished she would – even if all she would do was scream about how much she hated him. He kind of missed the company, which didn't really make any sense, he was forever being talked to by psychologists and reporters, all trying to worm into his brain and perhaps write a book about Squid's twisted mind and make millions. Squid supposed that's why he wanted to see her, because she wasn't gaining anything; it didn't feel fake. He was almost certain that April's lack of visits was due to her mother – that wretched bitch. Squid regularly defied his mother – back when he had one, so why couldn't she? The days grew longer when he realized life had no mystery left for him; it was all a routine established by the prison to make them turn insane – well at least that was what he figured. Day in day out it was the same thing over and over – for five years. He knew escaping wouldn't be easy, but he had to try.

His thoughts were interrupted as the man opposite cleared his throat. Squid looked up and saw the young man sitting with a look of slight nervousness on his face. He would be a relatively handsome man, Squid decided if it wasn't for the man's scar running across his cheek and a weak jaw line almost making him look feminine. The man's eyes were slightly wild; wide and unsettling, but as the pair of deep blues landed on Squid he felt a rush of remembrance trickle into his brain.

"You 'aint gotta' be nervous Zigzag," Squid drawled. He noticed a small twitch in Zigzag's eyes as he spoke his old nickname.

"It's Ricky," he immediately corrected with a rush of colour rising to his face, the words hadn't been snapped nastily, but they tumbled out his mouth as if involuntarily and as soon as he had realized what he had said he looked almost surprised at himself.

"You've done well for yourself I see," Squid observed, glancing over Zigzag's smart suit. Squid could see the once characteristically crazy hair had been tamed and was now greased and slick back – Squid thought he looked like a fool. Zigzag's long slim fingers drummed on the table at a quick pace and it was only when Squid sighed Zigzag looked him in the eye.

"I want to help you," Zigzag began "But you aren't stupid enough to think that I wouldn't be asking anything in return." Squid quirked an eyebrow and watched as Zigzag took a sheet of paper from his jacket pocket, placing it on the table. "I want to make a deal."

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Author's Note – I wanted to have a short appearance of Zigzag because too many OC's can be confusing. I hope you liked the way I portrayed his character – although I am open to all suggestions, but to suggest you have to REVIEW! Thank you.