Redivivus

Disclaimer- I do not own 'Holes', it belongs to Louis Sachar.

Summary – Seventeen year old Squid makes a transition from juvenile delinquent into murderer, and only the sister of the victim can give him the chance of redemption.

Warning! – Mild swearing.

Author's Note – Sorry it took so long. Oh and also thanks to the lovely reviews, it is much appreciated.

Chapter Seven

"Your Private Hell"

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"It says here you didn't really get along with your brother very well." April sighed gently and turned her face to the window behind where the psychologist sat staring at her. Lacing her fingers together, she held them at her chest and closed her eyes.

"What of it," she replied gently. The psychologist leaned forward and placed his hands on the table parting them and sighed also, quickly straightening the gold plate atop his desk stating proudly "Dr. Seywell".

"Well why do you think you had a rather tiresome relationship," He asked, rubbing the stubble on his chin with his right hand, the other brushing over his name plate. Her arms secured around herself, and then she looked upward, her features tired and sullen.

"I don't know," her words were strong, she seemed angry at him. He looked down; she knew she was being difficult.

"I promise you that the pain will subside. It will get easier" Her eyes snapped upward and gazed at him, an ugly mask of anger slipped over her skin, there was anger bubbling in the pools of blue and her nostrils flared.

"Don't you tell me that – It doesn't change anything, he is still gone." Dr. Seywell raised an eyebrow and quickly scribbled something down into a notepad on his desk. April gulped down hard the sick rising in her throat and closed her eyes briefly before, removing her disguise of anger and settling on confusion, her eyes meeting with his. "I mean, I open my kitchen cabinet and sitting there is a box of cereal I had bought for us – David always had a big breakfast, he had football and lots of other sports so he was always had a mixture of cereals and fruit in the morning – I mean I look at this box of cereal and I think, when I got that he was still here and yet, he's gone but the cereal is still just sitting there ," April had realized that she probably hadn't made much sense "It just doesn't seem fair." Her eyes dropped, and Dr. Seywell drew backwards in his chair.

"This is all perfectly normal, you will feel cheated and upset – crying is usual too." April shook her head and closed her eyes. Her small pale hands were clutched together in her lap and small short breaths left her lips one after the other quickly.

"I haven't," she mumbled. Dr. Seywell leaned forward once again and tried to catch her eye but her head was bowed.

"Pardon?" he asked. April looked up, a mixture of guilt and shame on her face.

"I haven't. You know at the court hearing – I didn't cry for him, I didn't cry because he was gone – I cried for myself; I'm selfish and self-centered. I haven't cried for him yet – I just feel so dry." She looked sickened with herself; it was a look which could have belonged to Squid – a look of disgust of her own self pity. Dr. Seywell arched a single eyebrow and his spectacles slid down his nose as he analyzed his notes.

"There is no right way to grieve, however if grief is contained, it could cause a later psychological illness," Dr. Seywell drawled almost as if bored, his beady-black eyes scouring across her face. "I want to give you some medication, from what I have heard over the last few days, these may just help," he finished, rummaging through a cabinet in his desk and placing a large bottle of pills on the table. April took the bottle into her hand and read the prescription.

"Antidepressants?" she asked, her eyes mixed with confusion "I don't understand." Dr. Seywell sighed heavily and stood up from his large leather chair, looking down at her, his eyes magnified greatly by his thick spectacles.

"I feel that these will help, they will make you feel better," he assured, a fake waxy smile plastered across his slightly purpling face. April's small hands clenched into fists and her large, round eyes narrowed.

"How will what I feel like change anything?" she asked, her voice harder but still with a soft edge. "He will still be dead. You think I want to be drugged to the point where I won't even remember him! It doesn't mater how I feel." With the final words tumbling from her lips she stood abruptly and flung the bottle at the far window behind Dr. Seywell's desk, making but a small crack on the window pane, but the plastic bottle remained unharmed. Seeing what she had done, April then fisted her hands into her greasy hair and bowed her head, heavy breaths leaving her lips.

Dr. Seywell's beady eyes were set in a mix between anger and shock, but as he opened his mouth to speak the ringing of the phone on his desk sounded throughout the now near silent room. Ignoring the girl in front of him, Dr. Seywell reached for the phone and cleared his throat importantly.

"Hello? Dr. Seywell speaking." There was a short pause as the person on the other side of the phone spoke, with a low mumble "I see. I'll send her straight there." He placed the phone back onto the receiver and then turned to face her, the large grin stretched across his face.

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Cold sweat had collected at his brow and the pain in his abdomen had faded. Squid tried to open his eyes but his lids were heavy and an overall weakness poured over his muscles. He opened his lips and let escape a low groan, as he tried to move his legs, and yet he was too weak. He gently rocked from side to side trying to wake his aching muscles from their sleep, but in turn he found his wrists bound either side of him with cold metal; most likely cuffs. A small pang of panic ran through his veins and caused him to try and wriggle himself free, but with no avail. His ankles seemed to also be restrained. His eyes finally managed to open and he looked around in panic; only clinical colours greeting him – he seemed to be in a hospital. The betrayal stung inside his chest, but perhaps he should have been prepared for it, Squid decided long ago that trusting someone was just foolish. Another low grunt left his lips as he once again shook within his restraints, the bed beneath his figure shaking and banging into the wall. The drowsiness had left him now, and the sudden rush of energy surged through his veins as he kept shaking the bed, he wasn't really sure what was the pint, he knew escape was impossible from this position so what he was trying to do was even a mystery to himself. Yanking his arm as hard as he could away from the bed side which it was cuffed to, Squid found that the tube inserted into his forearm was ripped painfully away from his skin and the machine next to his bed began to wail in loud short beeps. Many people all clad in white coats rushed into the room along with a few guards, crowding around him as he carried on shaking the bed violently. A needle was stabbed into his skin and he shouted in pain, slowly feeling the drowsiness overtaking him.

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"After that little episode you had, I'm surprised they even let me see you. They seem shook up; I guess they are hoping a visitor will do you good." Squid could hear this little whisper tingling in his right ear. His body was still aching, but nonetheless he opened his eyes and saw Zigzag, his slick back hair seemed to starting to become disheveled and a film of sweat covered his face. Zigzag drew in a shocked breath and jumped backwards as his widened, worried eyes caught Squid's realizing he was awake. Squid clenched his fists and narrowed his brow angrily at Zigzag.

"You complete bastard!" Squid spat angrily. Zigzag pulled on a mask of cockiness and a smirked, his hand trying in vain to flatten his hair.

"You better watch what you say around me. I mean…" Zigzag paused and looked quickly over his shoulder and then drew his face closer to Squid an air of secrecy hanging over them. "I am the one who can get you out of here. I am the one who can let you see her." Squid's brow relaxed and a jolt of remembrance ran through him at the thought of the girl who had started all of this. Squid relaxed his tensing muscles and allowed his head, which had been hovering about an inch above the pillow, to sink into the soft cloud. "But you can't do any shit like that anymore," Zigzag warned, talking of the resistance Squid had held against the doctors before. "Just do every little thing I tell you, and it will be worth your while." Zigzag rose from the chair he had been resting on and turned to leave the room, where outside stood two burly looking guards, clad with weapons.

"Wait," Squid began, his voice croaky and slightly shaking, "What was that shit you gave me in the prison?" he asked. Zigzag smiled and laughed lightly.

"A home recipe." He then tapped on the door and the guards turned to unlock the door and Zigzag left, the guards locking the door again behind him. Squid had always thought that Zigzag possessed hardly any real intelligence, after all he did get caught and sent to Camp Green Lake, but perhaps Zigzag did contain some genius; it certainly seemed that way now.

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A patter of feet sounded across the bare deep red floorboards, connected to a pair of stick-like legs. The house was quiet and the howling wind outside battered the large windows, allowing moonlight to spill across the rooms, lighting it with an eerie milky glow. A door was flung open and the patter of feet followed inside the small crampt cupboard under the stairs, the small door closing quickly with a click. April's thoughts raced and her breaths became heavier and shallower. Closing her eyes, she tried to regain her train of thought, but the voice rang in her head like nails on a chalkboard.

"See you soon! You'll see, you'll see!"

She didn't understand what he meant – or maybe she did; and that's what frightened her. She had been fine, well as fine as she could be, but it was that call she received while she was with Dr. Seywell. A call from the police, calling her to the station to ask questions about Squid; he had escaped. Her mind was racing along with her heart, blood was pounding in her ears and a loss of breath caused her to feel dizzy. Squid had escaped. The police had told her that he had been hospitalized after collapsing in prison, they had told her he only had one other visitor, which had led to a dead end, it was just some boy Squid had gone tot camp with, they had told her he had seemed in a rage and insane in the hospital, calling out viciously as he slept, lashing out at the doctors and nurses, and now he had escaped. She kept thinking about his promise, over and over, a song stuck on repeat.

"See you soon! You'll see, you'll see!"

Her stomach dropped as a sudden thump from above caught her attention. Sick was rising in her throat as she clutched to her knees, quivering wickedly in the cupboard, praying silently in her head, eyes shut tightly. Another thump boomed from above her and she could feel her lungs constricting as she held her breath, clutching her hands together, nails biting into her flesh. Thoughts rushed through her head, was she to run or stay put? If she was to run, she could be caught, but if she was to stay hiding, she could be found. She wished her mother was here, she wished someone was here. She hadn't told the police a thing – she didn't say about Squid's promise to be free again or about his comment to see her soon, she didn't know why, but it just didn't feel right.

"See you soon! You'll see, you'll see!"

It had been a while since she had heard anything; each thud had been one after the other with short space in-between, but now was silence. April tried to look through the dark in the small cupboard she was in for something to hide in, alas there only hung a few scarves and a few pairs of shoes. She listened out for any sound, but it was only the wind's howl she could hear, so she slowly opened the door, letting herself out of the cupboard. Maybe she was being paranoid – she wasn't sure. She glanced around and saw everything seemed to be unchanged, unmoving like it was suspended in time. Creeping forth she approached the bottom of the stairs and there lying before her she found the subject of the noise. Her father looked like a thrown rag doll as his limp body laid spread eagle across a few steps near the top of the stairs. April gasped and almost felt guilty as her heart's pace began to slow – there wasn't a murder coming to get her, it was only her father who had stumbled a few steps down the stairs, and that was the word that scared her – only. However, she ignored the guilt as she rushed up the stairs.

"Dad? Can you hear me?" she called. Her father groaned and she approached him. Already she could smell the alcohol on him and she was still feet away. Her father had begun heavy drinking since the news about David surfaced. "You know you shouldn't be drinking," she sighed, kneeling beside him. The room was dark and only the outline of his figure could be seen. "Okay, I'm going to try and help you up, okay?" she said, taking hold behind his back, her other hand resting on his chest, which felt oddly damp. As the smell of alcohol grew on her, April could smell a slight tinge of something else, something that made her feel sick. Resting his body back onto the stairs, April held up her hand to the strip moonlight on the stairs, and gazed in disgust at the gleam of red staining her skin. Looking down at her father's chest, she could only now recognize the pool of oozing blood pouring from his chest, soaking his shirt. April let out a blood-curdling scream but froze and footsteps approached.

"Hey there April, doesn't look like you're doin' too good. Why don't you come with me?" April slowly turned afraid of who she would see. But as she looked to the bottom of the stairs, Squid stood, the moonlight lighting his face with sinister eyes glinting in the light along with a cold smirk twisted on his lips.

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Sorry for the major lack of an update, but I hope this rather longer chapter makes up for it. Please review, thank you!