Chapter Seven: …Gone

Eric Taylor sat down at the closest chair he could find, running his hands over his face and hair. Why? Why could something like this happen? Everyone knows Tim made mistakes during his life, but it wasn't fair that this was the price he paid. Death wasn't fair. He was so young – could have been worth a damn instead of just a worthless piece of shit like everyone makes him out to be. But now, it's all been taking away. Eric begins to wonder if it was his fault. That he didn't look out for him enough like a coach and a father figure should have. Or maybe he's just cursed. Look what happened to Jason, what's been going on these past few years with Matt, and now Tim. Eric has to pay the ultimate price for his sins – having someone close to you die. Just – poof – gone. There is no other punishment harsher than that.

He looked over to his side to see the nurses and doctors leave Tim's room. His leg began to tremble. Would it be easier if he got up and found out himself, or if someone came and told him Tim was dead? Eric asked that very question in his mind over and over again before he found a woman standing it front of him, trying to get his attention.

"Are you okay Coach?" she asked. "You should probably go home and get some rest. Come back again tomorrow."

"Did I need to sign anything? Some kind of release forms or something?"

"Release forms? Coach, Tim still has a while before he can be released. You do know that right?"

Coach sat up and stared at the woman? Did she just say what he thought she just said? Coach felt the relief flood through his body. He's alive, he's alive, he's alive!

"Yeah, of course, I'm sorry. It's been a long night. Can I go in there real quick before I go?"

"Yes, of course. He's doing alright after that little scare. We're hoping he wakes up tomorrow so we can check him out fully."

Eric power walked his way to his room, completely ignoring the rest of the nurse's sentence. Just seeing Tim on that bed, watching his chest rise and fall, hearing the heart monitor's beep sounding like that should – it brought a smile to his face. He turned away a few seconds later and went home where he kissed all three of his sleeping girls goodnight, completely unaware at what the morning would bring.

Lorraine Saracen felt her eyes open and her body fill with energy at exactly 7:00 am Saturday morning. She quickly got up from her bed and took a look out her window at the blue sky and rising sun. It was going to be a beautiful day to work outside in the garden.

Once she was dressed and ready for the day, she took out two pieces of bread and put them in the toaster. She felt alert this morning, like she knew what she was doing, like she didn't need Matt to make breakfast for her or do anything else for her today. She has days like this here and there, where she feels in control of herself, of her actions. She smiles inside because she knows they won't be here for much longer.

Once she was done getting breakfast together, she sat on her chair as she does every single day and watched TV, waiting for Matt to wake up and help her out back in the garden. So she waited, and waited. Now usually, Matt would be up by now. He was never one to sleep in just because he could. But it seemed like today he was going to start. And she wasn't having it.

And with that, Lorraine got up from her chair and made her way into Matt's bedroom, his face and hand being the only parts not covered by the thin sheet blanket.

"Matthew, Matthew honey, c'mon, time to wake up now."

She tapped him lightly on the shoulder and heard what she thought was a grunt coming from Matt. She knew he was awake now and left the room, going back to her chair to watch TV, giving him time to get himself together. It wasn't until about twenty minutes later did she realize that Matt was still sleeping.

She walked back in his room and began tapping his shoulder again, this time more than once and with force.

"Matthew, c'mon. I need you to help me with the garden. You said you would wake up and help me do it. Now let's go."

Lorraine began to notice that Matt wasn't moving. Wasn't making any kind of noises, or even opening his eyes. Something wasn't right about it. At all.

She began to panic. Her heart raced, her body began to fill dizzy. She needed to call for help. So she ran outside of the house and began screaming, hoping anyone around her would listen.

"Someone help me!! Please someone!! I need help!! Help!! Help!!"

Matthew Saracen was pronounced dead at the scene on the morning of March 8, 2008.

The Taylors were, naturally, the first to find out about Matt's death.

Tami was up early that morning, her husband and daughters still sleeping. She walked into the kitchen and grabbed some eggs and orange juice out of the refrigerator, cracking the eggs into a frying pan. She stood there and watched as the eggs cooked when she heard the phone ring. Tami thought nothing of it, even though it may have been early in the morning, it was late enough where calls didn't mean worrying.

"Hello… Yeah, speaking… Can you say that again?"

Tami watched as the egg whites began burning but didn't lift a fork to stop it. She couldn't believe what she heard was real. Was this some kind of sick joke?

"No, no, I'm sorry, that has to be some kind of mistake. That's not… Oh…"

Tami found that words were hard to find. She felt her fingers shake, trying their hardest to hold onto the phone.

"Oh my God"

She took the phone and placed it on the table, turning the stove off, and wiping away the tears that were falling down her face. How could this happen? How could Matt be dead? That just didn't seem possible to her. This had to be a dream. She would wake up in a few minutes and find out it was all just a dream. But as time passed, as she looked as her ruined eggs, and as she saw her husband entering the kitchen, wondering what has her all shook up, reality began sinking in. How was she going to tell her husband that his star quarterback, the son he never had, was dead? And oh God, how was she going to tell Julie?

"Babe, you okay? What's wrong?" Eric asked, his hand on hers.

She couldn't say anything.

"Babe?"

Tami launched herself at her husband, wrapping her arms around him, crying into his tee-shirt. Eric had no idea what was going on? Did something happen to Tim overnight while he was gone?

"What happened? What's going on? Who was on the phone?"

"Matt's gone. He's dead. He's dead honey." She began crying even harder. Eric froze in place, hot tears falling from his eyes. He knew that she was telling the truth. And he had no idea what to say or do, except cry.

By now, Julie was awake and entered the living room, watching both her parents cry and hug each other. She wasn't sure what was happening. Was mom pregnant again or something? Julie wasn't sure if she could go through that all over again.

"What's going on?" she asked. Both her parents looked at her. Mom began crying again.

"Sit down, we need to talk," he father said. Julie's heart sank. This was no baby news. This was much worse.

"Oh my God, did something happen to Tim?"

"No, this isn't about Tim."

Julie felt her eyes begin to water. Whatever this was, they needed to tell her. This wasn't funny at all.

"Julie, this is about Matt."

Oh God, did something happen to Grandma? His mom? His dad? Julie's head was spinning in every direction, she couldn't say a single word.

"They… his grandmother found him this morning." Eric began crying again. Julie knew at that moment what happened.

"No…"

"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry Jules."

Julie's began gasping for air, tears falling down her face like a waterfall.

No, No, No, No. Not real. Not happening.

She fell to her side and landed on a pile of throw pillows on the couch. She began crying hysterically, gripping the pillows tight with every ounce of energy she had left. Her father came by her side, trying to console her, but nothing would work. Matt was really gone, and she never got the chance to say goodbye. She just lied there and cried out the guilt, love, and memories they would never be able to make together.