-1 SECTION 6:
THE TECHNOLOGY OF THE IRKEN RACE
Now I begin the section on technology. I'm sure many of you have been waiting for me to get to this subject, so I won't keep you waiting with boring monologue. Enjoy, dear readers.
Ironically, technology is a much easier field to discuss when analyzing an alien race. As strange as this may sound, it is true. Figuring out the possible types of propulsion a spacecraft may have is far easier a quandary than trying to deduce an alien being's digestive tract. The reasoning is simple: If it looks like a computer, processes like a computer, and operates like a computer, it must be a computer. It is easy enough to say "Well, think of this device as something along the lines of a Pentium 4000 processing unit." People can understand this. There are laws of physics governing space travel, laws that cannot be broken, save by the imagination of a good sci-fi writer. These laws make it relatively simple to identify the types of engines, fuels, and techniques space travelers would utilize in their travels.
COMPUTERS
The universal item on a list of technologies an advanced race would have is computers. From simple pocket calculators, to cash registers to the latest Cray supercomputers, our civilization has depended heavily on computers to advance as far as it has. Higher technologies, precise physics, and long distance space travel would all be dependant on computers of some magnitude. We can deduce, merely from watching the show, that Irkens possess computers that are super advanced by our standards, and are capable of artificial intelligence. In one episode, Tak the Hideous New Girl, we are introduced to the concept of a "Control Brain". In a later episode, we get to see these devices, as they had reprogrammed Zim in his past to be a food service worker. The Control Brains appear to be large PAKs!
The PAK, a computer itself acts, as I have said before, as a memory database for the Irken it is issued to. These PAKs are marvels of engineering, as they act as a life support system, a secondary brain, and from watching several episodes, even as a sort of high tech Swiss army knife, containing a myriad of weapons and gadgets. I can honestly deduce little about the inner mechanics of a PAK, except for the fact that they are connected to the host Irken's brain via the spinal cord, and are controlled by the Irken through means other than manual controls.
The Control Brains appear to be very highly developed PAKs, no longer dependant upon an Irken, but possibly acting as a collective database for the intelligence and memory of maybe the entire Irken race. Like the queen bee in a hive, the Control Brains would represent the Irken specie as a whole, and be the deciding factor in nearly everything from warfare to finances. Of course, the race would need physical leaders (the Tallest), but the Control Brains would be the "brains behind the brawn" in a civilization such as this.
I'll explain this concept in simpler terms: Imagine an enormous supercomputer with the knowledge and memories of George Washington, Theodore Roosevelt, Stephen Hawking, Albert Einstein, George Patton, Bill Gates, Andrew Carnegie, and Ulysses S. Grant all downloaded into its CPU. It would be a system composed collectively of what these men would do, think, and say. Now imagine this computer put in control of the decision-making and lawmaking of the United States, with a set of leaders, there only to willingly carry out the orders from this unit. There, now you have the concept of a Control Brain, and Irken government.
Zim's computer, which we have seen many times in his base, is merely just an advanced form of our modern computers, programmed with a voice recognition access protocol. The computer is voice and manually controlled, and has control over all of the functions inside Zim's house/base. The fact that the computer has shown sarcasm and even argued with Zim shows that it is capable of artificial intelligence, almost to the point of being sentient. It can be assumed that all other computers belonging to the Irken Empire are just as advanced, or probably more so.
Computers are also used to control Irken ships, communications, bio-medical functions, and, given the advanced state of Irken technology, probably even things as menial as research, in the sense of replacing books, transportation, education, and training.
SPACE TRAVEL
Space travel is relatively easy if you have untold amounts of time, and no particular destination in mind. Getting from point A to point B in space is trickier, and the concept of getting to a point B millions of light years away in a short period of time is no small feat to the greatest minds physics has to offer. Astrophysicists are constantly talking about how there are 9 dimensions to space travel, and the problems of long distance space travel, as well as the impossibility of approaching light speed in any craft.
Science fiction would have us all believe that interstellar space travel would be as easy as flipping a switch on the console of your Buck Rogers spaceship, and attaining instant light speed. Many scientists, including Albert Einstein have denounced the theory of traveling at light speed. Simply: the faster you go, the slower time passes. The closer you come to obtaining light speed, the more energy is required to go faster. It is an exponential equation that eventual comes down to the fact that once you are traveling at 99.9999999999 percent the speed of light, it would take an almost infinite amount of energy to make the final leap and join the photons. Since it would require such force to propel a body at the speed of light, we can say without a doubt that light speed would be improbable to obtain in any spacecraft. But say for the sake of argument that you could obtain the speed of light. Going at 186,000 miles per second, it would still take over 4.3 years to reach Alpha Centauri, the nearest star to Earth. Travel to other systems could in theory take hundreds, even thousands of years!
But in The Nightmare Begins, Zim was able to travel from Planet Conventia to Earth in about 6 months. With light speed out of the equation, how then could his ship expect to cross trillions of trillions of miles in such good time? Even the Cambridge train schedule isn't that expedient. The answer comes out of theoretical physics, the work of Stephen Hawking and the writings of Bob Lazar. Why travel from point A to point B, when you could bring point B to you? Confused yet? Good.
Simply put, take out a dollar bill. Say on one end is the point you are at, and on the other end is the point you're trying to get to. You could just travel the full length of the bill (linear travel through space and time), or you could fold it in half, bringing the points together, then unfold the bill, staying on the point you wanted to reach, and presto, you're there! Now imagine this in space. You dial in your coordinates, engage the hyperspace, actually bend space and time to meet your needs, and before any time has passed at all, you are there. But what could power such an engine?
A race as advanced as the Irkens would have long ago realized the uselessness of fossil fuels. They are finite, un-renewable, release harmful pollutants, and are actually not very efficient means of power, loosing most of their energy as waste. We rely heavily on fuels such as coal and oil due mostly to their abundance (for now at least), politics and the money that can be made off of these substances. Irkens, however, would have long ago found better forms of power for their homes, businesses, and space vehicles. Solar power, nuclear fusion, and electromagnetism are just some of the ways Irkens could efficiently obtain the power they needed.
Solar power would be impossible on a hyperspace ship. It simply wouldn't produce enough energy to power the systems necessary on a vehicle capable of such things. Nuclear fusion is out as well. A ship of this magnitude would require a nuclear reactor of magnificent size, enormous in proportion to the ship itself. What then? Possibly dark matter.
It works like this: A reactor core containing an ultra dense element (115 or higher), which is NOT found on Earth, but could possibly be obtained from neutron stars, would be used to create immeasurable thrust using a process of particle bombing to produce antimatter. When this antimatter or dark matter contacts matter, the opposing particles would react with each other violently, and it would generate an enormous energy reaction, well capable of throwing a ship into hyperspace. This is most likely the type of technology used by Irkens in long distance space travel.
Why then did it take 6 months for Zim to reach Earth? Well, he probably had to leave Irken territory before engaging his ship's powerful dark matter reactor, and no doubt wanted to come out of hyperspace in the general vicinity of Earth, say within a few million miles, just to make sure he got the address right.
WEAPONS
We know from watching Invader Zim that the Irkens have lasers. What is a laser? Okay, if you don't have the slightest clue, and you haven't kept up with modern science at all for the past 40 or so years, let me fill you in.
A laser is simply concentrated light energy. Light particles, called photons, travel in waves, much like sound, only at a different frequency. Like ripples in a pond, however, a great deal of these photons are lost in a line between two points. They have a tendency to spread out as they move forward. A laser counters this by super-concentrating the photons into a single ray or beam, usually through the use of a prism. So at the receiving end, your getting nearly all of the light you started with, ergo, the energy.
As with any energy transmission, a laser can be raised or lowered in frequency to accomplish many things. A low level would give you a fine tool for everything from messing with the neighbor's dog (a laser pointer) to a tactical weapons aiming system. Go higher, and you can (with years of medical classes) perform eye surgery and cauterize wounds. Even higher, and you could cut an M1 Abrams tank in half.
Irkens probably have plasma weapons as well. Plasma is basically pure energy, and if used as a weapon, could be quite effective at devastating entire cities from extremely long distances, as well as ship-to-ship combat. Plasmoid weapons are still very theoretical, so I cannot as of yet get into what would make them work, without being too speculative, and I'm no engineer, so I'll just leave it at that.
As a warrior race, Irkens probably started out with primitive weapons, the same way humans did. At first, like all animals, they no doubt relied on teeth and claw. Then as their brains developed, they began to use sticks and rocks, then spears and clubs, then knives, swords and bows, evolving into crossbows and catapults, cannons, and eventually firearms. We are still stuck on guns, but the Irkens of course have long ago evolved much better weaponry. Our history is ripe with the evolution of weapons. And strangely enough, the oldest and simplest weapons are still used today. Soldiers still carry knives, and a bayonet on a rifle is just a form of spear. Police officers carry batons, which are basically modified sticks.
Even though Irkens utilize lasers and plasma technologies as primary weapons, there is no doubt they still carry and are adept at the use of more primitive devices such as knives and bludgeons. No matter how advanced any military technology becomes, a knife seems to always accompany a soldier into battle. Though many Irken wars would probably be fought with plasma cannons from space, there would most certainly be many tales of brave Irken lieutenants who successfully led their platoons in a charge against a squad of lizard beasts or a swarm of giant space spiders with nothing but their trusty field knives.
Now you have something that up until now was rare in fanfictions: a detailed scientific overview of Irken technology. I hope that these theories and observations will be of value to writers of future fics, looking to write believable, logical stories, or at least ones with some basis in reality.