So soon? Yeah, decided to update. My two huge projects are due in a few days here...but I've got two whole days to go after today. So yeah...they can wait just a BIT longer, loo.
Next chapter coming your way!
Deep from the bottom of her aching heart, Sakura knew she had to do something. It felt so wrong to mope around for such a long time and let it happen.
Loosely holding her book and binder, she walked into her seventh class of the day; Biology. Hopefully Kakashi sensei will understand…I just hope I don't start crying again. She walked to her desk, letting the items she held slide from her grip onto the surface.
"Whoa, Sakura. You okay?" He did study human nature and psychology. She slowly turned her head, not lifting much; just enough to look over her teachers book into his eyes. Kakashi could see the redness of her eyes, and the puffiness of them. Something very bad had happened, enough to make a night's worth of crying take effect so soon. Her posture was terrible, and it looked like she could give a shit about herself.
He turned his back, walking towards his office as the bell rang. "Everyone, please read chapter ten; you will be quizzed on it shortly. Sakura, come with me."
She glanced around the room as she walked to the office with her Biology teacher. She happened to catch Naruto's eyes; he was right by her as she walked on. "Sakura-?"
The rosette shook her head, and walked into the office, Kakashi shutting the door. "Take the couch if it helps." Kakashi's office was actually quite big. His desk was positioned in the corner across from the door, rather close to it; it was a narrow, but long room. At the end he had a TV and radio, and against the wall left of the door was the chair, and to the right a couch. She sat slumped in the chair, looking at her sensei as he sat back in his chair, and put the book down. "Something happened, and I'm not going to let you walk out of here until it's resolved."
"I'll resolve it on my own, somehow." Her voice was straining; she'd been doing some crying alright, and a bit more.
He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the desk, looking into her red and green eyes. "I need to know what happened."
She didn't want to tell him. Well, Sakura did, but just the thought of the subject made her heart crack more. The tears welled up in her eyes; she wanted to tell him, one way or another. "Temari asked Sasuke to homecoming for me…I thought there wouldn't be any objection. And if he had a date or whatever, I'd be fine; Temari would tell me if he had one if he said no…" The rosette's green eyes fell, as did the tears, and her head. She heard Kakashi's chair squeak and roll back. "…He said no. Just…a blunt no."
His footsteps stopped as soon as his hands founder her shoulders. He lifted her; immediately, she took his shoulders, wrapped her arms around him, and buried her face into his chest. She was still in the large lounging chair, just sitting up to hug onto Kakashi for comfort. He knew all too well what exactly this meant. Sakura had told him everything about Sasuke. Past, present, and future, plus everything in-between that. And now that he knew his best student's heart was shattered the first time she took a chance, the least he could do was comfort her. His hand ran slowly and soothingly up and down her back. "My fault or not, you have to clue to how sorry I am. I was afraid the bastard might do something like this." Kakashi could feel the tears soak into his shirt, but heard a muffled 'what' after his statement.
"Sasuke; I should have told you. I believed in the back of my mind that he could just be leading you on and waiting to crush you. Why he's so sick I don't know. I want to be positive about this…but there still is a good possibility he's a blind asshole who really doesn't understand you now as you are and how you feel. So he wouldn't know the damage he's done." He held her just a bit tighter; she needed to let it out. And he wasn't about to let her leave the office until she felt a little better. "Either way, rather he knows or not…Sasuke's a bastard. If I find out this was intentional on his part…he can expect to fail every year."
Her fingers clutched tightly into his shirt, desperate to have something to hold on to. It was just too much, it really was. Sakura's heart throbbed so terrible in pain. Intentional? But…we used to be…so close. Why would he…even think of that? Sasuke…he wouldn't…
Kakashi was glad he was wearing a black long-sleeved shirt now; maybe it wouldn't bee too noticeable that half his shirt was soaked with tears of his student. "You still love him anyways, don't you?" She nodded slightly into his shirt. He sighed, patting her back. "Believe me, you or him will come to a conclusion about this. Something's gotta be done. Like-"
"No." Sakura's fingers stopped twisting around, and she lifted her head away. Her eyes remained downcast into the ground, only centimeters away from his chest. He let her finish. "I…I want to do something on my own. Right or not…I have to get rid of the pain. It's my issue…and no one should have…intervened or helped to shift me ways or decision. Sorry, not even you, sensei."
As soon as his large, firm hand rested atop of her head, she knew she'd said something right. Sakura's green, puffy, red eyes looked up to his smiling face. He hadn't smiled to proudly in a long time towards her. "At least you see that much now. You can stay in here, and I'll give you a hundred on that quiz. Got some soda in the fridge too if you want some, but I better go administer the quiz to the others."
Faintly, she grinned as he walked away, opening the office door. It scared her some that the class was dead quiet the whole time, probably trying to hear in on the conversation. Sakura had to remind herself Kakashi's walls were sound proof; they couldn't have heard much, if anything at all. Its not like they were yelling anyways.
She got up, went to the small fried, and grabbed herself a coke to sip on. Her form found its way back into the large leather chair, sinking deeply in to relax in some way. Sakura had to just think of what she'd to do solve this heartbreak at hand. She dabbled the thought during a break or so, but not much until now. And not until now did she realize what she really should do. Only one way could she for sure get her message across. Never had something been so clear to the Haruno so quickly. "A note." She sipped the coke, "A note…confessing what I've felt. Telling Sasuke…I can already tell it's the right thing to do. The right thing…in me."
Kakashi stepped back in, shutting the door. Just glancing at her, he could see the perfect resolve burning in her eyes as she sipped on the soda. "Wow, did I miss something?"
She nodded, staring off into the wall, "I know what I gotta do now."
Naruto froze from his quiz, eyes and hand trembling. He couldn't believe what he'd heard in that room since the door closed for the first time. He did have the seat closest to the office, and his hearing was as keen as a fox's. Naruto had heard it all, and now he knew what Sakura was going to do. But he knew the much bigger part too.
Oh my god… His blue eyes trembled immensely, Sakura is in love with Sasuke…and she's telling him even after this.
He was wondering who else had know about this love and the situation. Apparently Sasuke had no idea; even Naruto himself was shocked out of belief since he'd known the Haruno for so long. It must have been some secret love that she hid all along. He swore this much: he wouldn't interfere if it was against Sakura's wishes.
As soon as she got to study hall, Sakura set her books down, and took a seat herself. She hadn't thought much about what she'd put in the note to him; it'd only been a period's passing since her answer popped up before her eyes. Letting her confessions towards the Uchiha out and written before her eyes, and so strongly was one thing. But actually giving him the note with her heart and soul poured into it was a whole other level. It didn't really bother her at all she was going through with it either, and that he'd be reading his. Not like she even thought about it; all she had to do was give him the paper and she was good. Sakura really had to think into the future before she did such things.
The Haruno had out a pencil and paper, beginning to write. And it was all just coming to her as she wrote it out too. Sasuke, this is for your eyes, and your eyes alone. Right now, I don't really think I could be so down. I know Temari asked you this morning to go to Homecoming with me, and you said no. It may just be a simple no to you…but the truth is, I was absolutely torn at the fact you said such. I'm pretty sure you've never figured this out…but I was so hurt because of how I've felt for you for the past…around four years. Through it all, I've loved you.
For a moment, Sakura paused from writing. Her heart lifted, just seeing she had it out on this note, which she'd give to Sasuke herself. The years really have done something to us; especially the last two summers. For the first time, I decided to go for something with you to show how I really feel, and that it inflicted quite a bit of damage. Believe me, I've tried to break away from you…but I guess my hearts decided to stay with you. You really are the only guy I've ever felt like this toward, and even thought of being with. It's easy for me to see you don't feel the same, but I hope you'll be able to at least accept and cope with this. I really don't know what you'll do or how you'll take this…but I want to remain friends, at least that. I miss the old times we used to have together…so, do whatever with this. Accept the fact I love you, ignore me, whatever. I just had to tell you this. –Sakura.
She'd gotten it out; she finally did it. Sakura set the pencil down, and folded the paper carefully. It wasn't a sloppy folded note of squares; she had a special way of folding something so important. It was almost like a box, and you couldn't open it unless you pulled on some flap and the corners (1). It looked important, thoughtful, and neat at the same time. Sakura stuck it in her purse, prepared to give it to him at his locker at the end of the day. Just one more class to go, and the time would come.
The best part: she didn't feel nervous or intimidated at all. Sakura was ready to dive into this one, head on.
Slowly, as if she was having trouble opening it, Sakura did her combination and opened her locker. She was taking time to think about she needed; anything to stall until he got to his locker. But there was a bus she had to catch in a few minutes.
Sakura gathered her things, at a leisurely pace, looking back towards the row of lockers. Still he wasn't there. Grabbing her book bag, she put her homework in there, and locked the door shut. She let her green eyes drift back to where they were a few seconds ago; he wasn't there, or even coming towards it.
Shit, this HAS to get to him! When else am I gonna do this?! She waited against the wall next to her locker, just for Sasuke to appear at his locker. Come ON! I gotta get going…
Slowly, the rosette started walking away, clutching the paper in her hand. It was starting to hurt; her heart was sinking at the fact he might not now. But just before she walked past his locker, there he was, performing his combo. Sakura's heart welled up when she tried to approach him; the god damn butterflies were working at her nerves and muscles.
NO! There is NO backing down! I HAVE to do this! With one large step, she fell next to his side. Though, never had she felt so nervous; she refused to look up at him. She was pretty sure he didn't even notice her yet.
Lifting one had, Sakura tapped his, lightly. From the corner of her half covered eye, he looked down at her. She stuck the note out, refusing from giving contact; just staring at his hand which held his books. That's when his thumb lifted; she stuck the note under his finger, patting his hand lightly. "Just…read that, thanks."
The next instant, she split and turned to head for the bus, not looking back. But her heart felt so much lighter now; it had been the right thing to do. That grief disappeared because of a confession.
"Don't be out here too long honey!"
"I won't mom! Have fun on your date!"
Her mother smiled at her before waving, and shutting the back door. Her folks had a planned date tonight; dinner and a movie. They let Sakura get a sub sandwich for herself as a dinner.
But for now, the Haruno wanted to do nothing more than sit outside as it darkened, looking up at the starts from the hammock, and think. She'd gotten home, written in her journal, did her homework, and ate, all the while congratulating herself in the back of her mind on giving the person she loved such a note. She didn't believe she had done it herself; that she'd given Sasuke Uchiha a note confessing utter love and adornment. Really, Sakura didn't believe she had it in her, now that she reflected upon it. But she wanted to look back so much further than that. Maybe the note would re-open that old relationship of theirs they used to share? That would be dream goal number one; that, or actually dating the Uchiha. If he chose her to be with, he had to be extremely serious. Sasuke hated flings; he wanted a long relationship with the perfect person.
Sighing, she stretched out, and looked at the starts fading into view. The old days… Sakura remembered as if it were crystal she was gazing through. It started in Middle school, around 7th grade; a good half year or so in is when things really kicked off. It might have started in 6th, but they never had classes together; Sakura didn't even know he existed back then. But nearly four years back, she'd noticed him in a whole new way. Sasuke Uchiha was in Orchestra with her; a friend of Sakura's knew him very well, and she was sort of that tie which brought them together. Sakura couldn't remember exactly why they'd started talking so much.
But she was glad she did; over the summer of seventh, her friend, Ayame, had been killed in a car crash. She'd gotten Sasuke's cell number before the break, and called him once in a while to talk for a few hours. Sakura remembered perfectly well what happened that exact day; her home phone rang, and Sasuke was on the other line. He was the one who told her that Ayame was dead, and that he was aimlessly wandering around somewhere near her house. Neither knew where the other lived, but the street name was only a few roads away. Sakura ran out of her house that day, tears in her eyes, until she saw the Uchiha. There were no tears in his eyes, but more of pure blankness and gloom that wouldn't. Ayame and him were best friends and grew up together; he'd lost his best friend.
That day, Sakura had been there for him when he needed it. They were standing off the side of a two-lane street, under dark grey clouds, holding each other close. That summer day before the last grade of middle school was a day that bound them forever. Or so it seemed like it should have been forever. After hours, they went back to her place and talked, and she was actually able to help him out of his terrible depression. That death had the biggest impact on Sasuke that day, but he'd also gained a new friend who'd be there for him, who understood what he was feeling, yet be able to deeply converse with, and hold close.
8th grade rolled in, and both had almost all classes together. They were always around the other, talking, laughing, and enjoying the others company. Sakura loved those days the best. That's when she understood it was love she felt towards him, what she'd been feeling since they first met almost a year back. The Haruno kept that fact to herself unless he knew it was in Sasuke, too. Even later, they started visiting the others house, and got to know the family well.
Itachi, she remembered, always used to tease Sasuke when he and the Haruno sat in his room that he had one special person. Sasuke knew it too, but never really told her. He wanted to tell her, but didn't know if his friend would get it. That, or freak and leave him. He had a feeling that he'd be with Sakura like this forever, sitting in his room talking or having fun, but nothing more.
Sakura remembered wishing near the end of eight she could read Sasuke's mind, since he never had told her anything along the lines of loving her company, or was so glad he had someone who understood him perfectly well. The summer before High School came, and Sasuke's cell number had changed. She knew he'd eventually call her home phone (she didn't have a cell yet, for one reason or another.) That summer is what ended up hurting her terribly. Not once did he call her. First year came around, and they had lunch and Orchestra together. They talked at lunch, but nothing deep. It wasn't the same as it had been the year before; that fondness and bond between them of pure apprehension was gone.
The Haruno rocked the hammock back and forth lightly; the sky was a dark blue now, slightly clouded, and cold. I still wish I could find out what happened that summer to break what we had between us.
(1): Yeah, I tend to fold notes this way. It does look like a ltitle box, and all sharp. X3
The past has been revelaed! To a certian point! The main plot of how things went were there, not feelings detailed on both parts...obviosuly. So, there's chapter 4!
