Right, sorry for the wait everyone. I've re-written this about 3 times. So. Here you go. Naff intro, but ah well.
"You have no idea what's going on! You're way too busy flouncing off with Melinda, Naboo's not even in, and Bollo's always out there somewhere!"
Arguments bounced off the walls, seemingly amplifying the tense atmosphere in the cramped kitchen.
"God, shut up! You haven't even been in from 'work' for ten minutes and already you're making a scene. Quick everyone, all eyes on Vince, because incase you haven't noticed, somebody forgot to listen to him whinge, for a split second! It's even worse than them kittens you insisted on bringing home, who indulge in destructive behaviour if you ignore them for a-Gah! They're still doing it now!"
The smaller of the aforementioned animals looked up guiltily from trying to knock the salt and pepper pots from the table, then continued with an air of extreme smugness.
"Shut up! I got them for company! It's hardly their fault anyway…and why the hell am I talking about some cats when I'm meant to be arguing?"
"Well, you hardly need company! You're always with some common tart! You just can't stand that someone else other than you is happy, and the attention isn't solely on Vince! Just get lost. Some of us have more important stuff to worry about than whether our hair looks good! Quit trying to destroy other people's lives!"
"No chance of a quiet night in then!" Shouted the resident of the flat below, clearly irate that somebody was arguing. Again.
Howard grabbed his coat
"I'm going out, leaving you and your…problems here. You need mental help!"
"Why do you always have to be so bloody articulate when you argue?!"
"Fine then. Vince, fuck off!"
The door slammed, with some finality, but had to be opened again after Howard caught his coat sleeve in it. This would usually have been funny, but, given the current situation, it was acutely embarrassing.
He collapsed on the sofa, feeling drained. The TV still buzzed away to itself, and the rained hailed against the window. It was almost creepy how the weather could mirror your feelings…
Thoughts whirled round his head.
You're always with some common tart…
You need mental help...
Quit trying to destroy other people's lives!
Maybe Howard, and, apparently the rest of the world, were right…it certainly felt that way. He was at home, on a Thursday night, staring at a wall and crying silently, all because a few people didn't like him. Pathetic.
Almost in a trance like state, he walked to the fridge, pulled out a cold bottle of something alcoholic. It was blue in colour, which was slightly off-putting. Months ago, he would have been getting pissed and actually being happy, but now…
He sipped thoughtfully. It tasted disgusting, but suddenly, everything fell into place.
Nobody was in, or would be for the next 5 hours at least…
With some minor precautions it would be easy.
No one would miss him.
Vince Noir was going to die.
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screams and legs it