Random Chapter Four: SEYEFURZ NUU RULZ
"Cool, I've never been to a new world before!" Roxas said two hours later as Twighlight Town came into view.
"Yes you have, Dummy, and this same one as a matter of fact!" Axel said and than took a sip of his vanilla Coke. (Only because it was the only thing the O/13 Gummi Ships had because Xemnas loves vanilla coke.)
"I know," Roxas said, "I just wanted to say that."
"I figured you had some stupid excuse like that!" Axel laughed.
Finally, after two hours, they reached their destination and they landed in some random back alley that would keep people from gawking at them. Roxas skipped out merrily and was humming "A Whole New World." Axel, however, stumbled out like a tired old horse and had to lean against a brick wall.
"Geez...that was some work piloting that ship, I hope in the future they invent a way to warp to the different worlds!" Axel said, exhausted. He began panting heavily like an asthmatic cow.
"Ya' know Axel," said Roxas as he reached into his pocket and got on of those sea-salt icecream bars. "We could have just warped here like all the other Nobodies do. Why did we have to bring a Gummi ship? And why couldn't we have just gotten here after the meeting instead of having to lie so we could ditch?"
Axel gave a heavy sigh realizing his own stupidity, "Ya' know, what Roxas? Ya know what? The reason why we went through soooo much trouble is because we're morans, okay? Morans, morans, morans, morans, I'll ya, we're morans! MORANS! MORANS MORANS!!!" Axel continued to say the word "morans" and banging his head against the brick wall. Roxas didn't care so he just ignored him.
It just so happens that, Pence came along (that fat dude that's in Hayner's gang. incase you don't recall) whistling to himself and then he discovered Axel and Roxas. When he heard Axel repeating the word "morans" he stopped whistling, his eye widened. He ran up to Axel and pointed his index finger directly in his face and said: "OOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhh, YOU SAID A BAD WORD!!!!!"
There was an awkward moment of complete silence following this.
"Um... and who might you be?" Axel asked; he was very confused and actually a little bit scared.
"Hey it's Pence!" Roxas shouted excitedly.
"You know him?" Axel asked.
"Oh, hi Roxas!" Pence exclaimed, removing his attention from Axel. "Howsit goin'?"
"Whoawhoawhoawhoa...Okaaaay...um how do you guys know each other?" Axel asked, "Roxas, ya know, you're not supposed to tell people, your name anyway! Have you ever heard of 'in cognito'?"
"Clogs are not neato, Axel, for the fourth time this month!" Roxas said.
"I'm not talking about clogs, Stupid!" Axel exclaimed.
"OOOOOooooooh, you said ANOTHER BAD WORD!!!" Pence exclaimed, jumping back in front of Axel's face and pointing his index finger at him.
"Hey, Pence, don't spazz out, it's not that bad of a word." said Roxas.
"Oh, yeah...I forgot to tell you," said Pence, "Seifer made up some more stupid rules."
"Who is Seifer?" asked Axel, "Isn't he that dragon from that anime Yu-Gi-Oh?"
Before Roxas could answer Axel's question, Hayner and Olette came on the scene. "Hey, there you are Pence, we were looking all over for you...oh, hi Roxas." Hayner said.
"Yo, Hayner!" Roxas shouted. "Anyway, Axel, Seifer is...,"
"Axel?" Pence asked, "Is that his name?"
"Axele Rose?" asked Olette.
Axel quickly tried to make something up, "No, hahhahah, very funny...I'm not Axel, that was just a nickname we came up with...my real name is...uh...uh...,"
"Chamillionaire!" Roxas quickly filled in.
"Yeah, that's right, my name is Chamillionaire!" Axel said.
"No kiddin'?" Hayner asked his voice raised with excitment.
"Um...nope," Axel said nervously. "That's my name, all right! Well anyway, what were you saying about that Sirus dude?"
"Oh, ya' mean Seifer?" asked Roxas.
"Ooooh, let's not forget Seifer, why dontcha just marry him already Roxas! You talk about him twenty-four/seven!" Hayner whined in the most annoying way ever.
Roxas ignored this stupid remark and continued to tell Axel, "Seifer is like the town disciplary unit...or whatever." he said.
"So he's basically like the sheriff?" asked Axel.
"Um...he is not as...well...nice as a sheriff, but I guess you can call him that." Roxas said.
Axel laughed, "I bet I can I can kick his butt!"
"OOOOoooooh!!!! THAT'S THE THIRD BAD WORD YOU'VE SAID!!!" Pence exclaimed.
"Oh, yes, we forgot to tell you, Roxas. Seifer made up new 'rules' while you were gone." said Hayner.
"Now, you can't say any 'bad words'" said Olette.
"No, more like, every word in Webster's D." said Hayner.
"So you can't say 'dictionary' either?" asked Axel.
"OOOOooooh, YOU SAID A...!" Pence couldn't finish his sentence for Hayner had put an ice cream bar in his mouth.
"Nope, you can't say...that word...either." said Hayner.
"What's he gonna do, make you sit in the corner?" asked Axel, he began laughing.
"No, but yesterday, I said the "s" word ("stupid") and he made me walk around town in a cow suit while talking in a British accent the whole day!" said Hayner. "It was miserable!"
"What is he in kindergarten or something?" Axel asked, "Hah! I bet if I say 'dictionary' too loudly, I might start hearing police car sirens! Hahahah!"
Almost as soon as those words left Axel's mouth, the sound of police car sirens were coming towards them, but there weren't any police cars. It was Seifer accompanied by his two comrades, Fuijin and Raijin. Seifer had somehow attatched what looking like a police car light onto a yellow mine worker helmet and was wearing it on his head. Coming from a boom-box that Rai was carrying, a tape recording of a police siren was heard. Axel nearly busted out laughing when he saw this retarded scene that lay before his eyes.
The tape-recording stopped and Seifer held up some mini water guns. "Hands up or I'll squirt!" he threatened. Roxas, Hayner, Pence, and Olette held their hands up. Axel just sat there with a confused look on his face. His made a mental note to never go to this town again for the rest of his entire life.
"Okay, which one of you was cussin', hmm?" Seifer asked.
"Him." Pence said pointing directly at Axel. "Four in a row!"
Roxas gasped as if he just discovered this terrible news, "Axel Elizabeth Oglethorpe II! I'm ashamed of you!" (Roxas randomly added on the middle name and the last name.)
"You're name's Axel, eh?" asked Seifer.
"Oh, no of course it's not!" said Axel.
"It's not?" asked Roxas, his eyes wide.
"No, it's...um...who was that rapper again?" asked Axel.
"Chamillionaire?" Olette asked.
"Yeah, yeah! My name's Chamillionaire. Axel is just my...uh...Hebrew name. I'm originally from Java." Axel lied. He knew that his statement sounded retarded, but he knew people that looked as idiotic as these three, might actually fall for it.
"Oh, so you're Chamillionaire?" Seifer said, "Wow, I had better expectations of you. You of all people should know the "d" word ("dictionary") is highly offensive to rappers!"
"Oh, my bad. Just slipped out on accident...sorry." Axel said nervously.
"You better be, ya know!" Rai said.
"Agreed." said Fuu.
"Apology accepted," said Seifer, "But that doesn't mean you won't be punished!" he laughed.
"Shut up! You're retarded! I don't have to listen to you! I came here to get money so I could get chickens and if you got a problem with it, than you can stick this sea-salt ice cream stick up your ass as far as you can and then tell me how it feels!" Axel said holding up on of those ice cream stick- thingies.
Pence gasped noisily, "OOOOOoooooooooohhhh, YOU SAID... (counts on his fingers)... THREE BAD WORDS!!!"
"Hey, that's mine!" Hayner protested and swiped the ice cream stick away from Axel.
Seifer just stood, looking shocked, "I did NOT just hear that! No way! Me? No one has ever offended me, before!"
"Um...actually someone just did." said Pence.
"Okay, can we just go now! This is getting stupid!" said Axel.
"Hey, no one hurts Seifer's feelings and just walks away like that, that's just...just...um...ya know!" said Rai, "Look ya' made him cry, ya know!" And there was Seifer with his head buried in his hands and fake-crying away.
"Apologize." Fuu said.
Axel groaned, "Let's just go Roxas. I can't stand to look at that dweeb!"
"Bye, guys!" Roxas said cheerfully.
"See ya' Rox!" Hayner said.
After they left those extremely weird folk, Axel and Roxas decided to start looking for some way they could make money. They looked in a newspaper that they found on the street and found that there were several jobs. However, none were nearly as great as the jobs Roxas had described. One was to babysit some dogs another was to spread manure in some field and the third was to feed some dude's chickens while he was on a three day vacation. Wait a minute...did I just see the word "chicken"?
"That's it Axel!" Roxas exclaimed.
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" asked Axel.
"Yeah, let's go spread some manure!" Roxas said.
"Nope, that's not what I was thinking." Axel said.
Roxas sighed, "Darn, got it wrong again!"
"We should try taking care of that man's chicken's while he's away." Axel said, "Maybe this will be our chance to see if chickens are right for us!"
"Great idea...but...Axel, this doesn't mean you have doubts about my chicken owning skills?" Roxas asked.
"Huh?" Axel said, he didn't quite understand what Roxas was talking about.
"Nothing...," Roxas said, "Alright, let's go take care of those chickens!"