Title: Family Fun

Author: KrisB

Rating: PG

Spoiler: Up through Season 3

Disclaimer: All BTVS characters belong to Joss, Fox, M.E., etc. Not mine. Just having fun.

Summary: Response to ODD challenge #14 - Family Fun. Xander & Willow are turned into little kids and it is up to Buffy and Giles to take care of them until they can change them back.
Must haves:

Giles telling the kids a bedtime story, bath time, someone not wanting to wear clothes, someone telling Buffy and Giles what a nice family or (if it is a lot of kids) asking them if they know what causes that, one or more of the kids scared of the dark or of sleeping alone, kid-Xander trying to look up someone's skirt, Giles watching cartoons with the kids and/or playing at the park, happy BG ending.

Buffy woke on the floor behind Giles' couch with a crick in her neck. She grumbled and rose, stretching her arms and legs. She bent forward, touching her toes to stretch her back.

She froze as she realized the kids weren't running around making a fuss. She straightened, looked around and saw that Giles was gone from his desk. She was just about to call out when she heard giggles upstairs. She climbed them softly, hoping to catch the little trouble-makers in the middle of some toddler crime.

What she found made her insides want to go all mushy.

Willow and Xander were combed and dressed in pajamas, ready for bed and tucked under the covers. Giles was sitting on the edge of the bed, facing them, reading from a children's book. His rich voice was pinched high as he read a feminine character's line, which earned him more giggles.

"The end," he said with a soft flourish, closing the book. Willow and Xander clapped, saying, "Yay!" He chuckled and ruffled the head of each child.

"More," Willow insisted.

"Yeah," Xander added, "Peeeeeeeze?"

Giles chuckled again and set the book on the bedside table.

"But I have no more books to read you."

"Donchoo know any stohwies?"

"I know many stories, Xander. I used to work at the library, you know."

"You worked at the liberry?" Willow sounded as if he'd just called himself the smartest man in the world. He didn't have the heart to correct her mispronunciation of the word.

"Yes I did."

"Can you tell us anothoh stohwie, peeze?"

Giles chuckled. "All right, but just one. It's time for a certain little boy and girl to go to sleep." He reached forward and gently urged the pair to lay back. He tucked the blanket around them up to their chins and when they looked comfortable, he began.

"There once was a princess, who lived in a magical land of sunshine. She had long blonde hair, and blue eyes, and her smile was the most beautiful in the land.

"The princess was a very special girl, who was different from all the rest. She was chosen to protect her people. At first, she was frightened. But she was very strong, and very good at what she did. Soon she became the best guardian in the land, and saved her people from the bad men of the night."

"Aaw thew lots of bad men?" Xander asked. Willow looked up, keen on hearing Giles' answer as well.

"No. The princess stopped them."

Xander's eyes lowered. "Daddy's a bad man."

Buffy's throat tightened and she saw Giles working to control his own emotions. He reached forward and smoothed Xander's hair from his forehead.

"Your father won't hurt you any longer, Xander. Buffy and I will protect you."

"I know," Xander said. He looked up. "Is she owuh pwincess?"

Giles chuckled. "Yes, very astute, Xander. She's our princess."

"Wha's a stoot?"

"Smart. You're a smart lad." Giles looked from Xander to Willow. "You're both very smart."

Willow and Xander beamed and settled down further into their pillows.

"I believe I'll save some of the story for tomorrow night. I'll leave this light on for you. Just call if you need anything." He leaned forward and kissed each forehead. "Don't try to come down the stairs by yourselves, all right?"

Both toddlers nodded as they yawned. Giles stood, turned, and almost jumped out of his skin when he saw Buffy standing there. He quietly followed her down the stairs.

"How long were you there?"

"Long enough to hear your rendition of Missus Duck."

Giles chuckled. "Yes, well, I have it on a rather high authority that it is important to distinguish characters with voices."

"Who told you that? Xander?"

"No, Willow." At Buffy's bark of laughter, he continued through a grin, "She was quite insistent that I was 'doing it wrong'."

Buffy sank onto the couch and covered her mouth, giggling as she pictured little Willow, her face stern, telling Giles how to read a book.

"Did you notice how alike they are to their teenage selves?"

Giles grinned. "Yes, rather."

"Xander looked up my skirt while you were at the store."

"Again?"

Buffy giggled again and nodded. "I told him he's not supposed to, but I don't think it sank in."

"I didn't think I'd need to have this talk with him again so soon."

They chuckled and stood, moving to his desk.

Time to research.

Giles woke with a start at the sound of little feet pounding on the wooden floor of his loft. He sat up and was enlightened to the painful consequences of spending the night sleeping with his head on his desk. His eyes shot to Buffy, who was sleeping through the thunder of toddler feet. A book rested on her chest and her mouth was open just so.

His smile turned into a wince as he stood. He stretched the discomfiture away and looked up at the loft. Two pairs of sleep-crusted eyes stared down at him above wide grins. Xander's bangs were stuck to his forehead, and the back half of his hair was sticking straight up. Willow's hair looked as if she'd been on the losing end of a rather nasty fight with a disgruntled cat.

"Good morning, you two," he said. "Our princess is still sleeping. Shall we make her some breakfast?"

The two nodded and Giles yawned as he headed upstairs. He grabbed a change of clothes and slung the garments over his shoulder. Offering his hands to the mini-Scoobies, they slowly made their way down the staircase together.

He led them to the restroom first and indicated that it was time to take care of necessities. So the potty was used, and tiny hands were washed, tiny teeth brushed. He crouched down, smiling at them.

"Well done. Now, I need to use the restroom as well. If I let you two out, do you promise to be quiet until I've finished?"

They both nodded, their faces eager.

"I'll need your help with breakfast. Why don't you play quietly in the hall while I clean up, all right?"

The two nodded again, giggling as they slipped out the door. He shut it and sighed, hoping that he could trust the toddlers to keep their word.

Giles stepped out the bathroom feeling refreshed and awake. He was disappointed, however, to find that the children weren't in the hall. He closed the bathroom door behind himself and made his way down the hall. When he made it to the living room, he was sure his heart stopped beating for roughly five seconds. And when it resumed its beat, the staccato rhythm was absurd.

Xander and Willow sat in the middle of the floor, covered in colored ink. They'd somehow managed to pilfer the coloring markers he'd purchased – one of the items on Buffy's damned List – and were cheerfully drawing all over each other in a wide array of color and design. The moment of panic lifted when he remembered some of the markings on the marker packaging: "Washable!" "Non-toxic!"

He sighed and leaned against the wall. After a few minutes of watching them, he turned and went into the kitchen. Rooting through the bags, he found a disposable camera. Another of Buffy's List items. He went back into the living room, strolled up to the pair and smiled down at them.

"Are you lot enjoying yourselves?"

They giggled and nodded. He pulled the camera out.

"May I take a picture of your artwork? It's very nice."

The children smiled big and bright, holding their arms out for display. Giles chuckled, and assuring that the camera was ready, snapped a shot of them.

"I especially like the bracelets, Willow," he said, earning him more large smiles. He snapped one more photo, then tucked the camera into his jeans pocket. He couldn't wait to show the pictures to Xander and Willow once they were themselves again.

He held his hands out. "Come on, then. Let's make breakfast."

The two toddlers bolted from the floor and grabbed his hands, jumping and talking excitedly as they headed to the kitchen.

Buffy woke to the smell of bacon and the pained cries of one of the kids.

"Sssh, Xander, it's fine, see?"

Xander opened his mouth and loosed an awful howl as he held his finger up. Giles clucked and scooped the boy into his arms, rubbing his back and bouncing him.

"Hush, now, it's all right," he murmured, checking the food to make sure it wasn't burning. Willow sat on the counter staring at him with something akin to pity in her big green eyes.

"Aww, did Xander get another boo-boo?" Buffy asked. Giles spun and tried to smile at her.

"Good morning, Buffy. Did you sleep well?"

"As well as I could going to sleep at four in the morning," she replied dryly.

Xander, who'd stopped crying at the sound of Buffy's voice, twisted in Giles' arms and held his finger out. "I buhned my finguh." He sniffed, looking at her expectantly.

Buffy stepped forward, her face completely serious as she asked, "Do you want me to kiss it and make it better?"

"Yeah," Xander said weakly, sniffing and staring up at her pitifully.

Buffy reached out, cupping his hand. She leaned down and pressed her lips to his finger, careful to avoid the red area at the end. She held her arms out. "Better?"

Xander nodded and leaned in, trusting that she'd catch him. She did, and kissed his cheek. She walked over to Willow with a soft smile on her lips.

"Good morning, Willow."

"Good morning."

Buffy grinned and leaned down, kissing the girl on the top of her head. She looked at Xander, who was still looking at his finger with all the self-pity a three-year-old could muster for such a wound. She went to the fridge and pulled open the freezer, getting a piece of ice out.

"Here," she said. She grabbed a clean cloth and wrapped the ice in it. She wrapped the tip of his finger in the cloth, the ice cooling through the material. "Why don't you sit next to Willow and hold this for a while. It'll feel better, I promise."

Xander nodded and sniffed again. "Okay."

She placed him next to his partner in crime and smiled. "So now we know that things on the oven and counter are hot, right?" Both children nodded. "And we don't touch them unless we get help from a grown-up, right?" More nods. She turned to Giles, who was leaning against the counter, his arms crossed and an impressed smirk on his lips.

"Tried to sneak breakfast in without help, huh?"

"I was trying to let you sleep in."

"And let the kids express their inner Van Gogh's."

He laughed. "I left them for just a few moments to shower. I didn't think they'd find those markers."

"Rule one in babysitting, Giles: kids can and will do anything you don't expect them to."

"Duly noted," he replied dryly. "Shall we have breakfast?"

After another messy meal, and clean-up time for the children, Buffy and the dining table, Giles and Buffy sat on the living room couch. They let the toddlers watch cartoons on Giles' miniscule TV while they discussed the previous night's research.

"Giles, why don't we take them to the park?" she said.

"Are you quite certain the park would survive?"

She grinned. "We could all use the fresh air, and I bet if you bring a few of your musty old books, you'd get some research done while I'm entertaining the rug rats."

"Couldn't you take them alone?" he asked next. "I could get an immeasurable amount of research done if it were quiet here."

"It's never a good idea to go to the park alone, Giles." Her tone reminded him that there were many evils in the world, the least of which were the beasts she fought on a regular basis.

"Quite." He sighed and thought for a moment. "I'll pack the necessary items. Can you deal with the children while I take care of our more… violent needs?"

Buffy grinned and nodded. "No problem. Where are the bags?"

"In the hall closet, tucked high above their reach."

She laughed as she stood. "You'll be a pro with them in no time." She turned and said, "Hey guys, we're going to the park! Wanna help me pick out toys?"

"Yaaaaaay!" they yelled, their little voices bouncing as they ran across the room to the hallway. Buffy already had the bags pulled down from the closet and was setting them on the floor.

"Let's see what Giles got for us to play with!"

"Again!"

Buffy sighed and sank to the grass, her shoulders slumping. "Sorry, little guy. I'm tired."

Xander frowned. "I thought you was owuh pwincess."

Buffy smiled and shifted, indicating he should sit next to her, which he did. Willow followed suit. Good, she could keep their attention while they sat still a little while.

"I will protect you guys, but I get tired just like you. I have to rest sometimes, and then I can go again." She smiled down at them, not willing to tell them about the horrors of research until she couldn't see the words any more. "Wanna have some lunch?"

"Yeah, I'm hungwy," Xander piped up.

Willow rolled her eyes in a dramatic, familiar way. "You're always hungry, Sander."

Buffy giggled, amazed at how alike the kids were to their adult personas. She looked over her shoulder to see Giles sitting in a lawn chair, three books opened and stacked on his lap. She sighed.

"Let's go see if we can get Giles to eat something."

"Does Ji-yals always read so much?"

"Yup."

The trio stood and headed towards the picnic blanket and the ever-studious Watcher.

"Did he really work at the liberry?"

Buffy chuckled and nodded. "Yes. He was our librarian. He took care of us and read a lot of important stuff for us."

"Buffy? Does Ji-yals know evwyfing?"

"Almost," she said. They'd reached the blanket by the time she replied, and she looked up at the snort that came from Giles.

"Hardly," he said. "Are you through playing already?"

"We 'posta get you to eat," Xander said matter-of-factly.

"Oh you are, are you?" When Xander nodded, Giles leaned forward. "What if I'm not hungry?"

Xander looked to Buffy, confused. How could someone not be hungry?

"Giles, don't tease him," she said, and smiled down at Xander. "You two sit and I'll get your sandwiches for you." She lowered herself to her knees and glared at Giles. "You, too, buster."

Giles blinked at her.

"Giles. Books down. Tush on the ground. We're going to eat lunch."

He blinked again, and then removed the books from his lap, placing them on the ground away from the toddlers' reach. He slid from his seat on the lawn chair until he was sitting on the blanketed ground. Xander began to giggle. Giggled so hard, in fact, that he rocked onto his back.

"And just what has you so tickled?" Giles asked imperiously.

"You scayuhed of Buffy," Xander said, holding his little belly as his continued to laugh.

"I am not."

"Aaw too."

"Am not."

"Aaw too."

When Giles moved to speak again, Buffy broke in. "Giles." When he looked at her, she was grinning. "He's three. He'll always last longer than you."

Giles conceded and grinned down at Xander. "You win this time, but only because she's here, you little monster."

"I win!" Xander crowed.

"Oh, now I can't abide that," Giles said, and leaned over, his giant hand engulfing Xander's belly.

Xander shrieked and laughed as his hands clutched at Giles'. When Giles thought sufficient tickle punishment provided, he released the boy and sat back.

"Let that be a lesson to you," he intoned, winking at Buffy.

"All right!" she said, stopping whatever it was Xander was about to say. "It's time to eat." She handed a plate to Giles, then set one down before Xander and Willow. "Try to keep it on your plate, guys."