It was early morning on the ship when Zoe exited her bunk and headed to the bridge for her flight shift. Ever since Wash had died two years earlier, her and Mal split the early morning and evening shifts, with River flying the in between. She cherished the early morning. No one else was awake yet so no one bothered her as she flew the ship and remembered. She would think on all the wonderful times she had with her husband, and sometimes it felt like he was sitting next to her. When those times struck, she was especially thankful for the privacy because it meant she could talk to him and no one would think her crazy.
She walked onto the bridge and stopped short, surprised to see Mal asleep in the pilot's chair with an empty bottle of Kaylee's engine brew on the floor next to him. The sight of him like this shocked her. He had a few days worth of stubble growing on his face and his eyes were red and puffy. He reeked like Kaylee's moonshine. Zoe touched his shoulder lightly and startled him awake.
"Sir," she said with a touch of concern. "Maybe you should go rest in your bunk." Mal sat up straighter in the chair and shook his head.
"Can't sleep in there without her," he replied in a hoarse voice. "Don't feel right." Zoe sat in the co-pilot's chair opposite him.
"Sir, with all due respect, you look like hell," she said after a moment. "You need some rest. Maybe the doc can give you something."
"Gorram it, Zoe," he exclaimed. "I don't want anything from the doc. I just want my girl back, safe and sound."
"Malcolm," Zoe responded. Mal looked up in surprise. Zoe rarely used his full name. She preferred formal addresses like Sir and Captain.
"Mal," she said again. "I know what it feels like to lose the one you love. Hell, I know better than anyone on this boat what it means to have that person torn away from you. But you gotta remember something, sir. She ain't dead! She needs you to rescue her."
"What if we can't find her, Zoe?" Mal asked. "What do I do?" Zoe had never seen her captain this helpess. Even in all the battles they fought, he kept an optimistic outlook until the bitter end. There was nothing he couldn't do and he made sure the whole universe knew it. So it shook her to the core to see him so despondent and hopeless.
"Don't even be thinking that way, Mal!" she stated firmly as she gripped his shoulders. "You think on one thing, and that's getting to River and getting her home safe and sound."
Mal chuckled and rubbed his face with his hands. He regarded his formidable second in command with the respect that she deserved.
"You givin orders on my boat, now, Zoe?" he asked with a hint of a grin. Zoe gifted him with a rare smile in return.
"Only to you, sir," she replied. Mal sighed and stared out the window into the deep dark blackness of space.
"I've been having these dreams, Zoe," he said after a moment. Zoe looked over at him with a questioning look on her face.
"Care to elaborate on that, sir?" she asked.
"I've been dreaming about River," he replied quietly. "S'why I can't sleep. These dreams been waking me up most nights and the nights they don't, I don't feel as though I've slept at all." Zoe cocked her head to the side and regarded her captain intensely.
"What are these dreams about, sir?" she asked intently. Mal rested his hands against the console and leaned forward, taking a deep breath. He looked over at the woman he'd known for more than ten years and trusted with his life.
"Been different things mostly. Every time I fall asleep, it's something new. But it's always the same, if'n that makes any sense," he began. Zoe nodded at him, indicating he should continue.
"The other night, 'fore we picked up Peter, I dreamt about her in a dark room. She was strapped into a chair and she was screaming. Woke me up in a cold sweat because I could feel her fear," he continued. "Then tonight, I dreamt of her twice. First time, she was standing in the middle of a pile of bloody Reavers. I was watching her from the ground, and it's almost like she saw me, but then she panicked. Then, it switched and she was back in the dark room again. That's when I woke up. I tried to get myself back to sleep, but when I did, I saw her again strapped into a chair in an infirmary somewhere. They was poking her with needles. And she was screaming. They were hurting her, Zoe."
At this statement, Mal broke down and he didn't know whether it was the lack of sleep, the stress, feeling as though a piece of him had been ripped away, or a combination of all three. The man had never cried his whole gorram life, even when he cradled his mother's lifeless body in his arms back on Shadow. He stood fast and never let his emotions get the best of him. But here he was, sitting on the bridge of his mighty ship, crying like his world had ended.
"Have you talked to Peter about these dreams?" Zoe asked quietly after a moment, almost afraid to interrupt. Mal took a shaky breath and tried to calm himself down.
"Yeah," he replied. "He, uh, he offered to do some sort of crazy psychic meditatin' with me."
"Did you take him up on the offer?" Zoe responded. Mal shook his head.
"Well, sir," Zoe said. "I think maybe it'd be a good idea." Mal nodded in agreement.
"Think maybe you're right, Zoe," he replied, standing up. "Think maybe I'm gonna go find him." Zoe nodded and took over the flight controls as Mal exited the bridge and made his way down to the passenger quarters to find Peter.
Peter was sitting on the couch in the passenger's area with his feet propped up on a low table. He had gotten a hold of one of Jayne's gun magazines and was flipping through the pages. Every few moments he would glance up and look at the sliding door leading into the passenger dorm Inara was bunked in. She hadn't emerged since their discussion the previous evening and he was getting tempted to knock on the door and see how she was doing.
The sound of Mal stumbling down the stairs into the common room interrupted him from his thoughts.
"Peter," the Captain said sitting down on the couch next to him. "Remember how you were telling me about that meditation stuff. That maybe you could form a connection with River, or at least strengthen the one that's there." Peter nodded.
"Well, I want you to do it," Mal continued. "I'm having more dreams of her. Strong dreams and I know they're real. I need your help cause I can't do anything about them." Mal took a shaky breath and looked at the young man sitting beside him.
"Alright," Peter replied. "I'd rather do this with the doc present, if you don't mind. Just in case something happens."
"What do you think might happen?" Mal asked. "Is it anything that might put River in danger?"
"I don't know," Peter answered, shaking his head. "I've never established a psychic link through a third party. I just don't want to risk anything happening to you, since you're the only link we have."
"Then we better go find the doc," Mal replied as he stood. Peter followed him down to the engine room where they found Simon lying on Kaylee's hammock watching her work.
"Hey doc," Peter said, carefully stepping over the scattered tools and stray wires. Simon sat up and swung his legs over the side of the hammock.
"We need your help," he continued. Simon stood and looked from Peter to Mal.
"What do you need me to do?"
An hour later, the crew, including Inara, had gathered in the infirmary to witness what was about to occur. Mal and Peter were sat face to face on the metal infirmary stools, while Simon hooked them up to the cardiac monitors and checked their vitals.
"If anything unusual happens, then you need to break off the link," Simon said to Peter. "I'll be monitoring you guys closely, but I'm not sure how much good I'll be if things go south."
Peter nodded and looked at Mal, who sat there nervously.
"Maybe you should lie down, Mal," he suggested.
Without a word, Mal climbed onto the stretcher and lay down. Peter brought his stool closer to where Mal laid and closed his eyes as he concentrated hard.
Mal bolted upright and looked around frantically. He was sitting on a bench in a dark room. He scanned the room and saw that he was not alone. Peter sat on a stool beside him.
"Where are we?" Mal asked as he tried to quell the rising ride of fear that threatened to overtake him.
"We're in your mind," Peter replied. "I need you to focus. Try focus on River."
Mal closed his eyes and breathed deeply.
In, out, in, out.
He opened his eyes and saw River strapped into a chair a few feet away. He quickly rose and rushed over to her.
"Bao bei," he whispered as he softly stroked her face and kissed her gently. "Darlin' it's me. Open your eyes."
River squeezed her eyes shut and began muttering.
"Not real, not real," she cried. She began to shake the screamed: "Why are you doing this to me?!"
Mal grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her lightly.
"River, open your eyes," he commanded. "It's me! It's your Mal!" River opened her eyes and saw him for the first time.
"Mal," she said breathlessly. "How did you…I mean…what are you doing here?"
"There's no time, darlin'," he replied in a hurry. "I need you to tell me where you are so's I can come get you." River shook her head as the tears streamed down her face.
"I don't know," she answered frantically. "I don't know. He has me here. You have to leave. He'll see you and then he won't let you leave."
Peter walked over to Mal and grabbed him by the arm.
"I know where we are. We have to go," he said, dragging the man away from his lover. Mal wrenched his arm free.
"I can't leave her," he replied. Peter was about to argue when a voice echoed through the room.
"Well, isn't this an interesting development."
River began to cry harder.
"Please," she begged.
A sudden force knocked the breath out of Peter and sent him stumbling backwards.
Peter opened his eyes and saw the doctor leaning over him with a worried expression. He looked over and saw Mal lying on the stretcher, still unconscious but breathing.
"What happened?" Simon demanded. "Your pulse accelerated to a dangerous level and I couldn't wake you up." Peter looked around the room, wide-eyed and unable to speak. He quickly stood up and headed toward the bridge. Simon ran beside him, trying to keep up while Zoe trailed behind.
"You shouldn't be up, I have no idea what happened in there. I need to make sure you're alright!" he exclaimed as they walked. "And why is Mal still unconscious?"
"Maybe you should go back there and check on your patient, doc," Peter said as he stalked onto the bridge and sat down at the console, adjusting the course heading. Simon grabbed him by the arm.
"Not until you tell me exactly what happened," he demanded. Peter turned and stared at the young doc.
"We were able to establish a successful link with your sister," he replied after a moment. "She had no idea where she was being held, but I did. Before we were able to sever the link, Sylar discovered the connection. He pushed me out. I can only assume he's keeping Mal trapped within River's psyche for his own sick amusement. He might be able to break free on his own, but he needs to be monitored closely."
Simon let go of Peter's arm and rubbed his eyes tiredly.
"Alright then," he said with a nod. "I'll be in the infirmary if you need me." He brushed quickly past Zoe who had been standing in the doorway during the exchange. Peter barely acknowledged her presence as she sat down in the co-pilot's chair beside him.
"Mal ain't gonna be able to break that link by himself, is he?" she asked. Peter shook his head.
"Then our only hope of waking him up is to rescue River?" she continued. "I'm assuming you're taking us to where this Sylar is holding her." Peter nodded and adjusted a few more of the controls. Zoe glanced over and saw the course heading.
They were headed deep into the Dead Zone.
They were headed to Earth-that-was.