Azula's First Date Chapter 5
Azula's First Date Chapter 5
Disclaimer: Nick has all these people. I have nothing. This is just for fun.
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"Three…two…one…door. Guard who smells like oranges." She said quietly, her eyes closed. As if on cue the door opened and a guard did a patrol of the cells, also a cloying orange scent seemed to constantly hang around him. The reason was that his fiancée worked in an orange orchard and they would spend many an evening after work there enjoying each other's company. She didn't know that much, she was just considering if she needed to kill him or just knock him out. Knocking someone out is, contrary to popular belief, much easier than killing someone. Knocking someone out just required a swift swing and something heavy. The rest of the details settled themselves. Killing someone required planning before hand, something that could be properly used as a killing weapon, and planning afterwards because knocked out bodies raised alarm, true. However a guard finding a dead body not only raised the alarm, but it also made everyone that was coming after you try to kill you, rather than just capture you, so you ended up wasting more time hiding a body. It really was a trade off.
Either way, it had taken a while, but She had finally mastered the schedule of all the guards. Random spot checks were never really random. The way they worked were the same way She and her girls used to do it. You take a bowl and throw in it slips of paper with times of the day written on them. You pulled out four and then you went on those patrols along with the normally scheduled ones. The only problem was that if a prisoner was very very watchful, he or she could take a guess as to what increments of time were thrown into the bowl. For example, if a regular patrol took 12 minutes you didn't put in times that were less than 12 minutes apart. It kept patrols from overlapping. However, while humans are constant, they are in no way exact. She never met a soldier who didn't try to finish a patrol as quickly as possible, it was no different here.
In this case the patrols were always spaced 14 minutes apart. The guards, however, took only about 8 minutes to scan all the cells. So, even if there was one patrol right after another she would possibly have six minutes before the next. Give allowances for different speeds, or if someone important was watching them, or if luck just wasn't on her side, and she supposed she would have two minutes of opportunity. That wasn't much time, but She could make good use of those two minutes if She could pull off a few things, had a little more rope, and could get the damn door open. Picking the lock without anything more than some brittle straw from her bed wasn't a quick or subtle process. Still, at least she was making progress on her escape plan, soon she'd be ready to make a break for it.
But first, She just HAD to hear the end of this story.
Cough. Cleared throat.
"So, we're at the big finish?"
"You have no idea. I suppose I should have worried when I realized that Azula was actually having a good time." Shi sighed. "It was a cool evening, and the way back to the palace had them wind their way through a park. I trailed behind them, even after all of that I was still curious to see if he was going to win the bet or not." He shuddered. "This was perhaps the worst part of the entire experience."
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"I have decided that I have had a pleasant time." Azula said out of the blue as the pair walked along the park trail. She had Chou's hand in hers. Chou's hand was now a shade of blue that's more familiar to artists and less familiar to human flesh.
"Glad to hear that." Chou nodded
. "Although I am not certain on your qualities as a mate at this point, I will say that you make a very suitable person to be seen with myself. You'll be quite useful to me." She nodded to herself. "It will be nice to have someone to sit beside me at formal functions." She smiled more to herself than Chou. "Of course you will have to be…modified…slightly, and Father must give his approval." She turned to Chou and unless you knew better you would almost think that there was a single shred of concern in her eyes. "I do hope he doesn't kill you. It would be inconvenient for me to find another one like yourself."
"Of course." Chou nodded praying that his hand would soon be going numb. He hadn't registered fully the magnitude of horrors that were in Azula's last statement.
There were other people out in the park, a good many of them there for the same reason as Chou and Azula. There were also some children running about playing games, hiding from their parents, and catching fireflies. It was picturesque really, when Fire Nation propagandists needed an example of the kinder, gentler side of the Fire Nation this evening in this park would have been ideal.
Of course in that sentence the key words are 'would have.'
The trio's attention was slightly diverted by the kids catching fireflies. There were about five of them and they were even lucky enough to have an actual glass jar with a latched lid to put their captured bugs in.
Azula made a soft sound in the back of her throat. It might have been a sigh.
Chou had finally caught up to the conversation and was dwelling on the word 'modified.' He tried to come up with a few ideas of what she meant by that. His imagination, out of preservation of what was left of his sanity, promptly refused. He then decided that the best thing would be to keep Azula from thinking of 'second dates.'
"Excuse me." He slowly managed to pull his hand out of Azula's grip. She looked momentarily surprised.
"What did I say about letting go of my ha-" She paused as Chou held up his hand.
"I'll be right back." He said and walked over to the kids catching fireflies. Azula saw Chou go up to the kids, point at the jar. The kids yelled something back at Chou, Chou then pushed one of the kids down hard and the others scattered crying. Chou picked up the bottle, now filled with fireflies and presented it to Azula. "For you."
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"He actually stole from children?" She asked a little appalled.
"He did no such thing." Shi huffed. "He set that whole thing up. That was HIS jar!"
"Huh?"
"Okay, here's what really happened."
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Chou approached the small mob, making sure Azula was out of earshot. "Hey kids. How many did you catch?" He pointed at the jar.
"30!" One of the kids chirped. "That's six coins for each of us!"
"Fine." Carefully, out of Azula's sight he took out his coin purse and counted out 30 coins. "If one of you lets me push you down I'll make it 36."
The kids all looked shocked and one immediately stepped forward.
Chou quickly shoved the kid down, well…he put the coin purse in the kid's hand as he grabbed it and gave a soft push. The kid completely hammed up the fall, and him and the five other brats he was with took off like wasp-bats out of hell. Chou then picked up his jar and walked back to Azula.
"For you."
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"Chou set it up beforehand." Shi shrugged. "I think he thought Azula would like it."
"Giving her gifts while also abusing children?" She nodded. "Your friend is…was…very clever."
"Yeah…hopefully he'll get to be clever again." Shi sighed. "Anyway, Azula was actually pleasantly surprised."
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"Thank you." That was probably one of the very very few times Azula said those words and honestly meant them. "I was never any good at catching these things when I was young." Azula stared at the bottle thoughtfully. "Animals don't seem to like me. But then again," She shrugged. "I do not care much for animals either, especially pointless bugs like these." She threw the jar over her shoulder and let it smash against the stone of the pathway, the little bugs flew into the night sky.
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"Don't laugh." Shi snapped. "That jar probably cost more than the whole date itself!"
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The rest of the walk home was uneventful, and soon they arrived at the steps to the palace. "Well…" Chou smiled. "Here we are." He made a quick gesture to the palace. "I had a nice time tonight. I'm sure I'll never forget it as long as I live."
"Yes." Azula said feeling rather…odd. "It was an…above satisfactory night. I had fun?" The word felt strange in her mouth. She took a look at Ty Lee's list.
Let him kiss you. Once, on the lips, quickly.
It won't hurt.
And don't kill him.
Really.
I mean it.
Please?
At least try!
She frowned. That was just not going to happen. And if the boy…Chou…had any sense of self-preservation he would know that too.
"Well, it's getting late." Chou smiled. "I wish you all the best in your quest for domination." He swallowed his fear, plucked up his courage.
And extended his hand for a handshake.
He was brave, not suicidal. Screw the bet, he just wanted to LIVE to see tomorrow, dressed in women's clothing or not.
Azula blinked at the extended hand. Normally she wouldn't even consider such a useless gesture…but…well…she had an agreeable experience. Why not?
Right as she began to extend her hand she saw a sight that made her blood boil involuntarily.
Zuko and Mai were returning from their date as well. Walking hand in hand and slightly smiling at each other, they walked right up next to Azula, Chou, and Shi. Zuko ran a quick eye over Chou, to see who would be fool enough to take his sister out on a date. Chou turned to look at the prince, his hand still extended towards Azula.
"I had a nice time tonight." Mai said softly.
"Me, too." Zuko replied.
The pair shared a brief, quick kiss.
Mai then went up the stairs and inside the palace. Zuko watched her go, and then turned to Azula and Chou and gave a short sound of amusement and turned to head up the stairs as well.
Chou turned back to look at Azula.
Her face was livid with rage staring at her brother. Chou felt his heart beat begin to race wildly. Then she locked eyes with Chou, she was still mad. Shi took a few large steps back wards to get out of the blast range. Chou tried to keep from fainting as the blood rushed out of his body.
What happened next happened very quickly.
Azula grabbed Chou's still outstretched hand, and used it to pull him close. She took her other hand placed it behind Chou's head and kissed him.
On the lips.
Hard.
For about three seconds.
Then she let go. Chou staggered back. Eyes wide and blinking, completely stunned, slight wisps of smoke coming from his lips. Zuko was staring at the pair, stunned. Shi just gaped, his mouth hung wide open in awe. Azula looked very pleased with herself.
"Thank you for the date Chou." Azula said, turning to look at her brother. "It was much much better than just nice. Perhaps you'll enjoy my company again sometime, good night." She walked up the steps, past her irked brother and into the palace, where she was thoroughly grilled by Ty Lee on what happened.
Chou's legs finally gave out and he sat down, hard, on the palace steps, staring vacantly. Hands softly touching his lips, Zuko gave him a short scowl and finished his climb up the stairs.
Shi ran up to his friend. "I-I I can't believe it!" He smiled. "You actually pulled it off with all your organs in one piece! You're the luckiest son of a sky bison I've even seen!"
Chou looked up at Shi, smiled, and whispered "I win." Then he promptly passed out on the steps.
Shi blinked, then frowned. "NUTS!"
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"That's it?" She asked.
"That's it." Shi shrugged. "Two days later, we're in the Pai Shou parlor, a bunch of soldiers come in and escort us to the palace. We get there and Azula is standing in the audience room, absolutely furious. She looks at me dressed like this, and then at Chou. Then she…smiled." Shi shuddered. "Then she says two words that tell me that I was going to end up here if I was lucky."
"What two?"
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She stood there actually trembling with rage. Potted plants had burst into flames around her and in her hand was a piece of paper clutched so tightly in a fist she was drawing blood. She looked at the pair and snarled.
"A BET?!"
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"You know the rest."
She couldn't hold it in anymore. She laughed, long, loud and hard. That had to be the absolutely funniest thing she had heard since she had made Him dress up in women's clothing.
"I'm glad you find our situation so amusing." Shi grumbled. He looked at his, now sleeping, companion and sighed. "So, now that you know my story, how about you tell me yours?"
She sighed. "Nowhere near as exciting as yours. Prisoner of war, fought Azula and lost. Just like you I had the luck of ending up here."
"Well, you must have some more stories as a soldier then. Tell me, what's your name?"
"Oh, I can't believe I haven't said by now. It's Suki."
Author's Notes: Well it's not like I didn't make it obvious. Anyway, don't worry. This is not the end of the story, I will be answering the questions of what happened to Chou, how the two got caught, and a little more with our prisoners.