Shippuuden – I'll Win My Enemy's Heart, It's My Way of the Ninja!

By Unborn
Fandom: Naruto
Pairings: Naruto/Sasuke
Rating: PG16
Spoilers Warning: Shippuuden Manga roughly up to date.

The sky was starting to turn grey.

"I like this village, you know why?" A few and then several drops of water started falling from the sky at a rapid and unexpected motion.

"I love rainy days," said this 'leader', smiling. "But today it's bringing an unpleasant smell."

Introductory Notes: This is me updating fast and making all kind of mistakes in the way. Yes, this is "fast". By the way, it's only me or you also get the feeling this Naruto NaruSasu Silly Version is coming a lot like the old Naruto Mangas?

Version Beta-ed by: Simple-Minded Idiot.

CHAPTER 4-- Battle

A thunder boomed somewhere. Naruto attempted a Naruto Kicking Combo that the other man easily repelled. Kakashi came from behind with a fire-jutsu. Up to now, this man had avoided any unnecessary moves. Naruto went forwards again and retreated as instantly because of this guy's fighting spirit alone.

"Hatake Kakashi," said this man, "your crew killed two of my men and disposed of another one. I've also heard of the Nine-Tails, Uzumaki Naruto."

Sasuke was watching with silent, murderous interest now.

"I know better than to underestimate you," the man continued, "so if you want to attack me with all you've got, you better do it now."

Why was he telling them this?! The Leader made a seal and then a combination of them at an incredible speed, there was no time now to think. Immediately, Kakashi, by Naruto's side, copied every movement. His eyes grew wide when he recognized the last seal. 'That succession--!'

'Fire Element Technique: Powerful Self Implosion!' the face of the other man became deformed, as if sucked from his insides, reaching the point where his body blasted apart in an explosion – but the worst was yet to come because Kakashi's hands were making the seals faster than he was thinking. 'Damn.'

He attempted to jump backwards... he needed to put Naruto out of harm way... but he discovered he was carrying an extra weight:

Naruto was holding on one of Kakashi's fingers, unable-ing him to successfully make the last seal. Naruto was smiling foolishly at him. He had practically broken his finger, but he had just saved his life.

'Ah… I got hasty,' thought Kakashi. But he couldn't believe that man did it. He wasn't bluffing.

The last of the man's explosion smoke disappeared. In its place, only dirt remained. Then, there was clapping behind a tree.

"Bravo! Couldn't expect less from the Copy Ninja." It was the same man. The Leader was alive, and he had not a scratch on him!

'Kage no Bunshin? No. No shadow clone can do that,' thought Sasuke, watching the scene carefully. 'The user should have taken some damage…' But it had been Kakashi's fault to have fallen for such a dubious trap.

"To be able to reproduce my speed," continued the Leader. "Wow. I was praised for it, you know."

----

"How annoying, hm!"

Sakura and Sai were pursuing the blond shinobi who was traveling though the bushes in a giant bird. He was attacked by a hound of dogs made of ink and when he sent his explosive birds, they reacted immediately to dodge them or sought refuge against the explosions.

"Hm! So they know my attacks. Great, I'm the only one on disadvantage here –" Deidra petulantly whined. They had him between a kunai and a wall of explosive clay. He was pushed to resort to pityful skills of defense, hence he used his own clay creation to destroy the art of the expressionless boy.

"Not bad. At this rate, I'll run out of clay, hm. What a waste, why did Sasori-danna have to get himself killed?"

With a tiny amount of clay, he made two double-winged birds which traveled at twice the previous speed.

"Blast."

BAM! Both birds detonated upon reaching the young targets' faces, giving them less than a second for reaction. The explosion threw them off long enough for Deidra to pick height and a considerable advantage.

"Damnit." Sakura picked herself up. She had received the gist of damage on both arms for when she covered her face.

"Sakura –" Sai started.

"I'm fine, let's resume pursuit." She looked up, right and left. "Where's he?"

By a waterfall, Deidra removed a boulder and placed the body of the female tree-tails inside a small cave formation. He left her well-tied with chakra strings and replaced the rock back to its previous position, blocking the entry. "Done." He clapped his hands clean. "This is not my job."

Deidra mounted his bird and rose to the sky again.

----

It was raining down heavily upon them.

"Kage Bun Jutsu!"

At least 40 Narutos appeared; they were all burning with red chakra. They lunged forwards in what looked like a pointless attack. Then, hidden by the bodies of his own clones, Naruto came forwards with a rasengan. And again, and again 5 times. But, somehow, the man avoided every of these attacks, from every possible angle.

Now, only one Naruto stood. This one glared fiercely at the Leader man. Then, all of the sudden, he pointed at the sky and his face transformed into that of surprise.

"Look! It's that naked blond Akatsuki guy from before!" he exclaimed.

"Where?!" the Leader said immediately, looking to the right–

He caught Naruto's attack within seconds and no effort. "Heh, do you think I would actually fall for that?"

But then, he felt shadowed by a figure somewhere over him.

"LEADER-SAMA"

Upon looking up, he discovered...

There was it, Deidra, falling from the sky towards him, arms wide for an embrace and in all his naked glory.

"HEH?!" said the Leader, eyes open wide.

Then "Deidra" raised a fist and had a clean blow at the Leader's face.

The man was thrown back meters while the blond Akatsuki was engulfed in a cloud of smoke. From it came the face and body, now clothed, of a smug Uzumaki Naruto.

"How was that? I call it my Sexy no Jutsu v2: Male Body Appeal!" said a very boastful Naruto.

'So that's what he tried to do last time...' thought Sasuke.

'Just as I thought,' thought Naruto smugly, 'but, what a freak, he actually likes men!'

'Like us,' said the Kyuubi.

'Like us,' agreed Nar—'WHERE DO YOU GOT FROM THAT I LIKE GUYS?!'

But, however ridiculous the jutsu may be, it served its purpose. Kakashi had now a clean opening with which to attack the Akatsuki with Raikiri. That he did, without wasting time complimenting Naruto, yet.

The Rakiri never hit its target.

This man had seized Kakashi by the wrist, "Now more than ever I'm most interested in that Nine-Tails." When Naruto came with Rasengan, he held his wrist too. Then he turned those attacks on each other with the swiftest of motions.

The two looked like rightful dolls, watching helplessly.

Something happened before the fatal blow. It wasn't too clear for Naruto, but he felt himself lifted off his feet and that flash before his eyes soon turned into Kakashi on the floor. Naruto noted, he was injured but alive, not to even mention his own harm-free state. Sakura and Sai were watching them, now back, and Sakura was mouthing…

"Sasuke-kun…" ?

Sasuke had an arm around Naruto's waist, the latter's limps hanging helplessly, and the other hand was holding what appeared to be a chakra-molded sword that was currently piercing though the leader's chest. Plainly and ultimately, Sasuke had put Naruto out of harm's way.

"I thought you wouldn't help them," said the Akatsuki man. He looked mildly surprised but had a too untroubled demeanor for someone having so much blood dripping from his mouth.

"Tell my brother I'm waiting for him," said Sasuke, not one for wasting time, "Tell him that, if he defeats me, he can take Naruto."

'Eh?' thought Naruto.

"Eh?" said the Leader, with that same stupid surprised face. "I'm afraid I won't meet him, but why don't you tell him yourself at the Hidden Village of Rock?"

Sakura, Sasuke, Kakashi, Sai and Naruto barely had time to react to something like this, the man started making seals.

"Lightening No Jutsu: Silent Suicide Technique!" The man was stuck by an electric bolt coming from within and killing him violently and gruesomely. There was less than a man left when he was done, and done he was.

"Another Kamikase Technique," commented Kakashi, looking at the body. There was no mistaking it: these were some of those skills used for desperate situations. Like when held captive, to avoid others to steal information from you.

"Ah, Sasuke," he suddenly said, turning to the younger man. "I feel I must ask too. Why did you change your mind about helping Naruto?"

Ah. He was expecting that question. 'Weak,' hissed a voice that was not his own in Sasuke's mind. 'You only pretend you have control but you are weak.'

Sasuke held a stronger grip on Naruto, making the situation more uncomfortable for the latter, 'At all,' just to drop him to the floor. 'I had already decided, I'll not be told how I should feel, Orochimaru.'

"If you die, I've no way of finding Akatsuki," Sasuke retorted. "Though I have, but it would be somewhat more troublesome."

"Yeah, I know, I know, now take your hands off me," Naruto said, pushing him away further stubbornly. "Stupid Sasuke, thinking he can manhandle me like that…" he muttered. (Kyuubi: 'He can manhandle me anytime he wants') "…under his arm, like some stupid book…"

Sasuke's bit of old self seemed to emerge, he chuckle. "If you want to have the upper hand, Naruto, then become stronger than me."

----

"We weren't expecting them to tell in on their own people," said Kakashi while they were back at traveling though the woods. "It's possible that the Leader had a good reason to give his member away, nonetheless, think this must be a trap."

There was general agreement in the group.

"Well', I'm glad it's the Hidden Village of Rock."

Panting from traveling at such a high speed, the group regarded Kakashi's comment with questioning looks rather than verbal questions. The group could barely keep up. Sasuke was before them, gaining speed with a severe loss of patience.

Kakashi responded as if he had the breath to, "We sent letters to the main villages some time ago expecting us for investigation, but the Hidden Village of Cloud thoughtfully refused to let us in."

'I knew it,' thought Sasuke from the front. Of course, there wasn't much point by straying from the waterfall village to the rain village in one go when the cloud was nearest. Even then, they had opted for a very dumb path though the woods. Kakashi was wasting his time.

Sakura asked, "So, the Hidden Village of Rock…"

"Hasn't yet answered."

The group stopped on its motion with questions of "Eh?" and "So how will we –" Kakashi threw out four objects, one for each.

"That's what these are for."

----

They stopped them at the frontier. Like Kakashi said, the Rock had the tightest security amidst the main countries and a very efficient information network. The guard team had met Team Kakashi, the latter had their faces hidden behind masks.

"Identify yourselves!" said a Rock's guard team leader.

"Oh?" said Kakashi, sounding almost comically lost. "Missing Nin-Hunter squadron from the Leaf. Sorry to come with so short notice, there's no time. We come in pursuit of dangerous criminals that have infiltrated the Rock, we are responsible for one of them –"

Nothing of this had made any impact on them,

"– Itachi, Uchiha" until that point.

The reaction was instant. Shock had struck after those darkly-spoken words. There was hesitation between the group, looks exchanged and weapons lowered. (All of which seemed to fire Sasuke up even more.)

"You might pass," said the guard team leader at last. As Kakashi suspected, the Rock would claim responsibility for almost any invading criminal but just not for Uchiha Itachi. It came as "fortunate" somebody would take care of this job for them, if only to drive them out their country.

For every guard they came across (and there were many), it was the same. Kakashi asked them if they heard anything about the issue and it didn't take long before one of them recognized the pattern of the men's clothes as described by Kakashi with fake enthusiasm. They were pointed to a rock formation at the limit of the city.

Kakashi tried to fill them in on his strategy, planning to throw a dust bomb -an specialty of The Rock- inside the cave they had located them at. This was to drive them out, but Sasuke jumped forwards, brought out his katana and in a swift motion destroyed the rock formation in one go. Two figures like shadows jumped off the crumbling place. One of them was shark-like, Kisame Hoshigaki. The other man before them was no other than Uchiha Itachi.

----

Meanwhile, at the frontier with the grass village, a figure emerged from the bushes. Deidra lowered himself to the floor where he was summoned.

"You made it in one piece," remarked Deidra, impressed.

If the Leader was to boast about it, he never got to. With an expression of surprise, he asked pointing somewhere in Deidra's arm, or what supposed to be there, "Where's the girl?"

Deidra hm-ed! "I left her hidden by a waterfall at the Rain."

A crow flew by.

"But why did you do that?" asked the Leader.

"I'M NOT A DAMNED CLON, DAMN IT!" Deidra said. "I had two after me and that body was extra-weight, and this is not my responsibility."

The Leader sighed miserably, "That means we'll have to go back… ah, now I feel unmotivated..."

Author's Notes1: Sai ('s Silly Techniques Dictionary) vs Sakura ('s Walking General Knowledge Encyclophedia)

CHIBI-SAI: By general rule, boy/boy romantic comedy is 3 percent plot, 12 percent awkward situations and 70 percent sexual innuendoes of sorts. Authoress Unborn is clearly lacking to obtain a favorable balance, wouldn't you say, Sakura?

CHIBI-SAKURA: (Inner Sakura: Eh? How have been dragged into this conversation?) Wha-what is it that you are trying to imply? (suspicious) Well, but since we are boarding the subject (matter of factly) ... In favor of the theme, I will have it noted, it's not all about the smut a reader of slash and/or yaoi seek for this kind of stories! Those of us who have been drawn to the Naruto fandom have done so even if a 60 percent of the show is on fighting and mostly centering on Naruto.

CHIBI-SAI: I believe the word we are using here is "manhandled." A word that, I believe, appeared over too many times in the last chapter. (tiltes head) It's the potential-kiss catfight syndrome for women, isn't it?

CHIBI-SAKURA: THAT'S NOT IT AT ALL! (/momentary InnerSakura's burst out) But it's not like anything but attractive character would draw those gir—I mean, readers to the gender. Whilst for me, my role in the show from this standpoint becomes ambiguous. What is my role in this fanfic to start with? I feel neglected.

SAI: If I had no dialogues but the concerned "Sasuke…" and "Naruto-kun!", I would feel neglected too.

That night, in bed: Sai couldn't lay on one side of his body.

Final conclusion: Authoress likes boy-on-boy action too. (Note: Refer to chapter 347 Shipuudden)

-

KA CHIN!