A/N What if Rodney hadn't taken the big dose of Wraith enzyme and escaped from Ford's men in The Hive?

The rest of this story is told from Rodney's POV. We already saw Sheppard's, though it was much shorter. I think this was because most of what was happening in the story happened to Rodney. Plus, it's hard for me to write from John's POV.

Rodney leaned against the wall of the cave. The tether on his ankle pulled tight as he drew his legs closer in an attempt to warm himself. He ignored the pain where it had rubbed the skin. He ignored the rough stone, scraping his shoulder and cheek. He closed his eyes, imagining that he was back on Atlantis. Back with his team. They would be in the mess, taking food from each other's trays without a thought. It would be an ordinary day. Maybe they'd discuss the new arrivals from Earth. He and John would point someone out to the others. Maybe Rodney would complain about one of the native cultures. He pictured Teyla's face pinch with irritation at his lack of tact. Ronon would be baring his teeth in amusement. Elizabeth would smile a genuine smile and admonish him to be polite. And Sheppard? Sheppard would give him that look, the one that said, "Behave for now, but when the grown-ups leave, we can go back to having fun."

He absently raised his hand and used a small pebble to scratch another mark on the wall. There were 49 marks. He'd been on this planet that many days at least, though he wasn't sure exactly how many (some days he'd been beaten so badly, he hadn't been able to mark the wall). This was the longest they'd stayed in one place. This was the fifth planet. He estimated that he'd been a prisoner for over half an Earth year. All this time, and he was alone. Living a nightmare. He hadn't even had the hope that he'd be rescued. He knew the others were dead.

When they hadn't returned from the hive ship when they were supposed to, Ford's men had gated to another planet and left him with another camp of enzyme users. From there, they'd gone to another, where he'd nearly escaped. The third planet had been bad, with the inhabitants chasing them to the gate, slinging arrows until they'd gone through the wormhole. The last one, well, Rodney didn't' even want to remember that stay.

So they'd come here to live in a cave. Rodney didn't know the gate address, but it seemed to be a sparsely populated planet. He hadn't seen anyone else. Of course, it wasn't like they let him out of here. No, he only saw daylight from a distance when the sun was just rising, when the rays bounced around the cave entrance.

He hated this place. He was slowly going crazy, nothing to do, no one to talk to, living in fear. He was in constant pain. The others didn't even see him as human. They ordered him around, but it wasn't like they conversed. They gave him the enzyme, but only enough to keep him addicted. And, he thought, alive. He had been useful to them, on occasion fixing weapons, DHDs and using Ancient devices. They were keeping him around for now but that didn't stop the constant beatings, torture or ... other things.

He was stronger than he used to be, but not as strong as them. And he definitely wasn't as skilled as they were. He'd tried to fight, but it soon became clear that he couldn't win with force. There were only three of them, but they were three large men taking large amounts of Wraith enzyme. In the beginning there were closer to a dozen, but on trips to get more enzyme, they'd lost the others. He settled down to sleep, hearing the echo of Carson's voice telling him, "Rest, you need to regain your strength."

00000000

Days passed. He was up to 57 marks. He didn't think he'd missed any days, but sometimes it was hard to tell. This planet was relatively safe, meaning boring, so the men had little to entertain themselves but him. He didn't think he'd live much longer. He really hoped he didn't, at least. And they kept anything he could kill himself with far from his reach. He let out a chuff of air. Suicide watch in the Pegasus galaxy, he thought, pulling on the rope tied to his ankle. He might be miserable, he might be helpless, but he wouldn't do that. Ronon hadn't done it as a Runner, and he thought Ronon would tell him that as long as he was alive he could wait for an opportunity. The three men looked over at him. He tried to hold himself still, so they'd lose interest.

He called the men Big, Ugly and Mean. Big was descriptive of the man who was a sort-of leader. He had to be even taller than Ronon, and he was definitely bulkier. Even without the enzyme he might have been able to take the Satedan. Ugly had a nasty scar splitting his face from eyebrow to chin. Mean, well, no elaboration necessary. He was the smallest of them, and the most vicious. He enjoyed hurting Rodney. Most of his serious injuries were because of him. The other two, he thought, did it just because he was there. Except Big, but he cut off that line of thought.

If he did ever manage to escape, he'd have some valuable intel. He could tell Elizabeth, for example, not to trade for the greenish root vegetable shaped like a heart. It would kill half the population of Atlantis. He knew not to go to planets with the white creeping ivy (it had large blue flowers whose pollen was a powerful hallucinogen). See, valuable.

By listening, he learned that the men had killed several Wraith that had been scouting the area around this planet's gate. The enzyme made them nearly as strong as Wraith, and the primitive villagers had seen them win the skirmish. He snorted. That was one of the reasons he disliked these one-step-up-from-Neanderthal planets. Setting up a bunch of drug addicts as gods.

He learned that the population was small because the Wraith had visited recently. The winter season was approaching, and the land totally would totally freeze over. The natives had a large building that they all lived in during the cold season. Mean wanted to just kill the people and move into the structure. Ugly argued that then they would have to provide their own food. Big said they were going to leave the planet altogether. Big won in the end, as he always did, and he celebrated by abusing Rodney yet again. Big was the only one who did that, the others always finding willing women in the small village. But Big apparently liked using an unwilling man. And with the idiots who populated the planet practically worshiping them, the scientist was the only unwilling man around. Lucky him.

The men packed up the belongings worth taking, slinging the pack onto Rodney's sore back- so now he was a pack mule?- and headed towards the gate. He tried to see the gate address, but Mean stepped into his line of sight with a smirk. Rodney dropped his eyes. He knew better than to try to stare down the man.

Again, Rodney allowed his mind to drift. He could escape this for a little while. He pretended that his team was with him, ready to gate home to Atlantis from a mostly successful mission. He'd say something witty, John would grin at him and Teyla would turn away to hide a smile. Ronon would stare, and say, "That's stupid, McKay." Elizabeth would be waiting in the briefing room to hear all about the trip off-world, and Beckett would cluck over small injuries. He even imagined Radek, the little Czech telling him about the technology that had needed fixing while he was gone.

He wondered who was head of security in Atlantis now? Maybe Caldwell had gotten the position finally. Maybe Elizabeth had pulled strings to have Major Lorne take over for Sheppard. There might even be someone totally new running the military contingent.

A hard shove pulled his mind to the present. "Get through the gate!" Ugly shoved him again. His pronounced brow-bone lent him an air of menace. The heavy brows shadowed his eyes so that he always seemed to be hiding something. He limped to the gate and stepped through.

At first, he almost believed himself to be on Lantea. As far as he could see, there was ocean. He savored the sound of the water and the slight tang of salt in the air. Looking around, he could see that the gate was at the top of a mountain, and in the other direction lay a heavily forested area.

"We go down to the settlement and see whether we stay. You," Big pointed at Mean, "Stay with McKay."

As the men walked towards the camp, he felt his stomach clench. Ugly sidled closer to him, and Rodney felt his rank breath on his cheek. "I should probably warn you that I know this place. So don't try to get any help."

Like he'd try that again, he almost snorted. Last time he'd tried to enlist help from a native, the man had immediately notified Big and he'd nearly been killed. He suddenly realized this was the first time he was untied with only one of them. They seldom untied him, and when they did, they kept at least two with him. Should he make a move? The gate was just behind him, he could gate somewhere safe. Well, relatively safe. He could go to the planet with the kids, the planet where they'd found Ronon or even the planet with the Iratus bugs. Hell, he'd be safer on the Genni planet. No, the kids. Licking his lips and closing his eyes for a moment, he suddenly let loose a swing towards the man's face. His damaged hand connected with Mean's face, and he felt the bone snap. His? Mean's? He didn't know, but Mean didn't go down. He laughed.

"About time! I thought we knocked all the fight out of you!" He grabbed Rodney's arm and swung him to the ground.

A solid kick landed in the middle of his chest. Mean smashed his foot into Rodney's knee, and he screamed. He curled up as best he could, grateful for the pack that protected his back. His arms and legs and hands, however, received the brunt of the kicks.

Mean hauled him to his feet. He saw a gleam in the black eyes that he only usually saw in Big's . Oh, no, no, no. Not going to happen. He struggled and tried to ignore the pain in his bleeding hands. Sending his fingers deep in the man's face, he gagged as he felt the skin tear.

Rodney's arms jerked back as the pack was torn from him. He fell to the ground, crying out as his damaged knee hit the hard earth. Rolling to the side, he avoided Mean's foot, but the man managed a hard kick to the side of his head. He lay there dazed for a few seconds, staring at the clouds in the sky. He blinked a few times when he was rolled back to his stomach. The dirt was gritty on his face and he felt the wetness of blood trickling down his jaw.

He went away again, sitting in the seat next to Sheppard. The jumper flew back from the mainland during the night. He imagined them arguing over something silly, like why Americans called it football when they hardly used their feet in the game. Their banter would be both annoying and amusing to Teyla and Ronon. The stars would be clear in the sky, while in the distance the horizon glowed softly. It was a good dream.

Mean lay along Rodney, panting. Rodney didn't bother to move when Mean rose and nudged him with a foot. "Get up."

Rodney lay still, feeling the last of his hope flee in the face of his helplessness. He was finished. Let them kill him. He wouldn't move. "No."

Mean squatted down next to him, and whispered, "Don't you want the enzyme? If you get up, I'll give you some."

His breathing hitched. Oh God! He wanted it. He could feel his body start to vibrate with need. Sweat beaded on his forehead, and he shivered. Yes, he needed it. He had to have it. Disgusted with himself, he managed to drag himself to one knee, the other resting awkwardly on the ground. Mean grabbed him under the arm and hauled him up. He groaned as he put some weight on his injured leg, but it was when he felt a trickle run down the inside of his thigh that he began to silently cry.

Mean prepared the needle and roughly jammed it into Rodney's arm. He felt the rush, but it was stronger than it had ever been. He looked at Mean with big eyes.

"Yeah, nice big dose for you. Gotta make sure you can make it out of here." He wished they'd never heard of the enzyme. Clutching his pants with one hand, he raised the other to cover his eyes.

Big and Ugly ran up the side of the hill. "We can't stay here. Open the gate to another planet." Big narrowed his eyes at Rodney, who stood with his pants barely covering him, bleeding and bruised. He turned his furious stare towards Mean. "We talked about this. You were told to leave him be. He's mine."

Mean sneered, blood drying on his face from the gouges Rodney'd made. "Not anymore."

Big waited a beat, then brought his gun up. He shot the man in the forehead. "We have to go. There are Lanteans here."

The scientist stilled. His first thought had been Sheppard. No, he was dead. So someone else. Who? Did it matter? If he could just get away, get to the settlement, get to help! Sheppard would take this chance. Before he had time to think it through, he jerkily headed toward the hill. The enzyme gave him strength, like nothing he'd ever felt. He could make it if he just kept going. He heard the men yell out at him, but kept going. He slid in places, brush and rocks tearing at his skin. He kept going. He was finding it hard to breath, and his knee screamed with every step, but he kept going. They were following, and were gaining on him.

No, he wasn't going back. He was getting away. One way or another. If he died, at least he would be free. He wouldn't die with one of them sweating over him, or their fists beating him. He could hear their pounding feet so close behind. He was not going with them! With one final lunge, he threw himself down the hill and began to roll.