Daimakaicho Ranma

Chapter 8

Ah! Wicked machinations?

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Asgard, the seat of all divinity, the place of pure light and holiness, Heaven in some mortal languages, and a place fabled as the greatest end-all to all existence holding the gates to the Divine Elysium Fields. Within Asgard is the Yggdrasil Systems Control, the second most powerful place in all of Creation; Kami-sama's chamber being first and the Nidhogg Control in Nifflheim being third.

The Yggdrasil Systems Control is a massive white-lit spherical room of gleaming marble and gold, with lush green vegetation and work-stations of various deities floating through and around its vast open space, but dominating the very center of the room is the Yggdrasil itself.

The canopy of a massive tree, bathed in a soft pastel rainbow of lights, like ribbons swirling and twisting around it, each beam with its own purpose… a destiny. Not surprising that the tree was in fact a machine that brought control to the chaos of creation.

Around Yggrasil sat the three primary Systems Operators, The Goddess' Ex, Chrono, and Ere all stationed at the gilded harp-like controls of the massive computer, plucking out a fate altering melody all under the careful scrutiny of an elder goddess, currently the skimpily-clad raven haired beauty Peorth, filling in for the exotic Urd.

Unnoticed by anyone in the flurry of activity, a small golden dot formed on the ethereally white floor just a few paces behind goddess Ere, the dot rapidly increased and spread out forming a magical runic glyph of soft golden light, and suddenly it became a short column of golden light that drew the attentions of most everybody present.

Soon the light began to fade off, revealing the blue haired goddess, Rind in her utilitarian white body-suit and cape. The sight of her familiar face lowered the defenses and attentions at her abrupt arrival and even brought out smiles. If you can't trust Kami-sama's personal First Rank Valkerie, who can you trust?

"Quite the flashy entrance mon ami, most unusual for a prime Walkure…" quipped Peorth with a smirk from her floating seat down to Rind.

Rind just looked around for a moment dumbly, and then said more to herself; "Yggdrasil? Why am I in yggdrasil…?"

"Oh… you're not here to sing me adulations of my supreme greatness I'm most surely due for my selfless toiling away in making certain the universe runs smoothly? You wound me so, Rind-chan…" Peorth said affecting overly dramatic hurt, clutching at her chest.

"On no… looks like you-know-who is getting a swelled head again…" Chrono leaned forward and whispered conspiratorially causing Ere and Ex to giggle at the joke.

"I heard that!" Peorth shouted indignantly over her shoulder causing the giggling to increase, she then turned back to Rind who was just stepping out of her transport array and said, "So, Rind, quite the surprise to see you Here of all places…"

For a moment Rind fidgeted and looked uncomfortable under the gaze of the One One Unlimited Goddess Peorth in her skimpy leathers, then said politely bland, "It would appear that my teleportation from my last mission went afoul, Lady Peorth."

Peorth's cheerful face fell slightly as she said blandly, "Obviously…" then her cheer sky-rocketed again as she asked excitedly, "Do you have any good dirt? You know, something, Juicy… from your last mission maybe? It gets sooooo boring around here at times… I know! We could take lunch, get a drink and you could relate some of your latest exploits… maybe see if any of the manly war gods are up to a good time even later…"

"No." Rind said curtly, then softened and said with a light bow, "My apologies, perhaps another time Lady Peorth."

With that she began walking towards the grand archway leading out, when Peorth said back softly, "Alright till then…" as she thought to herself watching the retreating Rind, 'How odd…'

Rind was almost to exiting through the domineering gates of the Yggdrasil Control when the shouts of the goddess Ere came though of, "Whoa! I'm detecting 2… no, make that 3 Demonic System Bugs approaching! AND FAST!"

Peorth then shouted in disbelief, "WHAT!? How'd they manage to break through the barriers and encryptions?!"

"Unknown Lady Peorth!" Ex shouted as she worked frantically.

"Lock it down! This is a level Alpha breach! We cannot let them corrupt the system!" Peorth shouted as she leapt from her floating seat to stand aside and assist Ex.

"Prepare for Demonic Bug incursion in 3… 2… 1!" Chrono shouted as the tempo of their plucking at fate increased to prevent massive data corruption.

Without turning around Rind winced internally with guilt knowing her unshielded teleportation directly from The Infernal Council Hall in Muspelheim was the cause of this, as the sound of the three large dog-sized growling and salivating black partially insect-like monsters materialized within the Yggdrasil Chamber itself with a roar.

Rind then just ran out as Peorth shouted, "Sacrebleu! Come on ladies; time to bash some bugs! And whatever you do, don't let the buggers reach the Yggdrasil!"

For a great many minutes, Rind just ran, through great halls of gleaming white, and through grand futuristic vistas of lush green gardens, past various deities of multiple pantheons and their spirits and angels, raising their robes in her wake. She ran all too aware of herself, of the little bottle nestled up the sleeve of her white bodysuit, and what she was about to try.

'For Sith, for our people… I must…' was her sole driving thought.

At her breakneck pace, she soon found herself just standing at very familiar doors in the absolute center of Asgard, in the gleaming gold and white Tower of the Almighty One. She looked up and down at the massive double-doors, noticing all those little details that are never paid attention to, like all the many layers of gold and silver glyphs and markings of so many languages all set around a fluid design of woven boughs and leaves. For a brief moment, hesitation gripped the normally stoic Valkyrie, but she brushed it off as best she could and with trembling hands pushed her way through into the Chambers of Kami-sama, she had to momentarily squint her eyes at the onslaught of pure white light.

Rind adjusted her white cape and patted down her light blue tresses to make herself more presentable as she strode with dignity through the room that even in the majesty of Asgard was simply awe inspiring, with its seemingly infinite space nearly completely filled with lush green life and the imbued feeling of calm as rainbows flittered overhead.

As she approached the de-facto center of the room where the light of the Almighty shone brightest around a hovering column-like desk that was surrounded by thousands of small floating screens depicting currently-happening scenes throughout the universe, there came words that seemed to come from many places and many voices, "Welcome back Rind, the mission was successful I see."

Rind said on bowed knee, "Yes, My Lord. The rogue spirits on Planet Jurai were silenced as was instructed."

The all surrounding voice "Hmm'd" in acceptance, then said, "It is good, but for some time I was concerned."

"Concerned of what?" Rind asked cautiously.

The voice of Kami-sama spoke again with warmth, "You Rind; for some time you were lost to my sight, and now you seem troubled. Tell me what upsets you so?"

Rind gulped nervously trying desperately to force away her anxiety, and said, "I'm sorry My Lord, after the mission… I… I… that is to say… I went and spoke with my sister." she said with her head bowed, being completely honest.

"Sith." said the voice sounding annoyed at the single word as Rind nodded meekly.

"I know… My Lord that I shouldn't of… but she's… and me… it's just so hard at times…" Rind babbled.

The resonate voice of the Almighty sighed, and said calmly; "I do know Rind, the toll this conflict between our two kinds has been difficult on all of us, especially-so for those with family divided. But you mustn't let sentimentality and family obscure from you the truth that your sister is of the darkness and evil. Hence, her self-proclaimed title of Goddess of Evil."

As HE spoke, Rind couldn't help but to notice the only potted plant under glass in the entirety of the cambers was atop HIS desk, a flower native only to the cold, dark dampness of Niffleheim, the Hilder Blossom, named after The Daimakaicho; a tall scraggly flower with a chaotic thorny bloom of white with purple tips and a black center. Known best only for its effective neurotoxin derived from its seeds that could cripple most beings in the universe. A beautiful and deadly plant, in absolute contrast to everything around it, including Kami-sama's words.

Outside her façade of meek obedience, Rind couldn't help but to think bitterly, 'Hypocrite…'

"You, most of all Rind, know the hardships of Grace and the duties ascribed to the protection of the planes of existence and the mortal beings." Kami-sama lectured.

Inside the privacy of her mind, Rind couldn't help but to roll her mental eyes and groan, 'Always caring more for the monkeys than us…' outside she said, "Yes My Lord, I'm aware of these things. But surely with your past relations to Lady Hild and your daughter Mistress Urd you'd be acutely aware of… of a… well a desire to at least speak with family, even despite the conflict."

There was silence for some time, then the voice of Kami-sama spoke, "True… I do suppose I cannot fault you for desiring to speak with your elder sibling. But caution is merited Rind, for Sith is quite manipulative and conniving and would not hesitate to warp you away from the path of light."

Feeling more comfortable now that her chat with the Creator seamed to be coming to an end, Rind smiled slightly and said, "Thank you My Lord, and yes, I DO know my sister well in these matters even though several millennia have passed since we last spoke in great length. But before it escapes my mind, there is just one more thing, My Lord…"

Kami-sama spoke with an amusedly curious tone, "Oh? And what could this be Rind?"

Smiling, Rind reached into the sleeve of her white body-suit and said, "After my last mission I decided to get you a present, albeit a small token…"

The overall light of the chamber went up by many factors as the glowing figure of Kami-sama spoke happily pleased, "A present for me? Rind, this is a most welcome surprise."

Rind nodded with a smile saying, "A Surprise? Yes My Lord, a surprise…" and with that Rind swiftly removed the dark glass bottle of the tortured woman containing Sith's spell and pitched it high upon where Kami-sama seated himself.

For moments Rind tracked the arcing of the small bottle, dread began to fill her as she thought about all the ways this was going to fail and her stupidity at trying to attack The Creator… then she'd be punished. But to her amazement Kami-sama either didn't seem concerned, or shocked still at such a blatant attack from a person he so trusted, as the bottle tumbled through the air towards Him.

Then, a mere two meters from the on high figure of Kami-sama the little bottle of the tortured woman exploded with a wailing air-splitting scream and Rind's breath caught in her chest as she watched Sith's spell unravel and unfurled from it's confines and spread outward.

It was as if time was slowing down as she watched a dozen or more spinning rings of oozing darkness, some as wide as five meters, filled with randomly moving silver and red text formed out of the mist of the bottles remnants and begin to engulf Kami-sama.

HE brought an arm up, to either block or dispel the attack with superior force, but it was milliseconds too late as the first ring encircled Kami-sama on the horizontal axis, then the next following to encircle him at the vertical axis. With these two whirling and whooshing rings spinning in place and interlocked a bubble of transparent dark-hued energy snapped into place as more rings piled on.

All of the rings spinning clockwise, or counterclockwise, or rotating and flipping around whooshing the surrounding air in the gyroscopic movement of the bubble as the golden and red runic text flowed across the dark surfaces of all the rings in a blinding fast pace giving only momentary glimpses of the being of light inside.

Then Rind blinked and time was normal and the spell completed, and there was a bubble of darkness surrounded by so many fast moving gyro-rings containing a being in the indistinct form of a man, of radiant white light.

"RIND! What is the meaning of this treachery?!" Kami-sama bellowed, sounding none too pleased, and all-too vengeful.

"I believe the humans would call this a Coup d'état, My Lord." Rind said matter of factly.

Kami-sama gasped and said with shock and disappointment in his voices, "Why Rind, why have you betrayed me?!"

Rind rose to stand, trembling slightly with anxiety she did something she'd only done once before, she spoke to Kami-sama face to face, "I'm sorry My Lord… but our peoples are suffering from stagnation and neither you nor Lady Hild see the problems… the mortals cause us, so my sister Sith is right for one thing… it is time for change, long over-due."

"Release me, immediately and your punishment will be tame, Rind." Kami-sama growled out vengefully.

Rind just shook her head and said, "I'm sorry My Lord, but Sith has had ten millennia to perfect this spell since the end of The War at the singing of the Doublet Treaty. It is simply beyond my abilities. It's even independent from the Yggdrasil."

"Impossible… all spells are either tied to Yggdrasil or Nidhogg to draw power, a spell cannot exist independently." Kami-sama ground-out angrily.

Rind just shook her head and stayed silent, in a last ditch enraged effort Kami-sama entrapped in the sphere of darkness and gyroscopic rings exploded into a fury of white-hot light, Rind had to scream a bloody soul-wrenching scream as her corneas were burned away so she didn't see tendrils of eternal white lash out at the confining bubble distorting its shape here, and there, but never breaching it as the energy of creation roared away trapped inside.

After several minutes the nova of holiest light settled back into the form of the man in the middle, the glowing figure then slumped to his knees not paying attention to Rind clutching her red-blistered hands to the sockets where her eyes once were in her burned-away face, but HE did notice that on a ring roughly in the middle of all the other rings was the proof of Sith's mad genius. On that ring there were seven brightly glowing glyphs, those few symbols showed that the spell drew no outside power to sustain itself, but rather all its power came from within… from HIM. Kami-sama had to laugh a bitter laugh at the thought that he was powering his own isolating prison.

Then there came Sith's frantic voice from within Rind's scorched and smoldering body-suit, "Rind… Rind! What's happening? The spell has been activated, but not finished! What's happening up there?!"

Rind groaned weakly as blood pooled at the corner of her seared mouth, "It hurts… sister it hurts so much…"

"Rind?! What's happened?! Hold up the mirror and let me see!" Sith's voice implored.

Rind slowly and delicately moved as flakes of red and black charred skin cracked and broke away to reach into her suit and pulled out a small mirror that looked like an eye, once exposed it flashed with golden light once and Sith's serpentine face came to rest in its reflection.

Sith gasped at the sight of her burned sister, and muttered, "He burned you badly… Rind, now listen, hold the mirror over you, and I'll heal what I can from here. Please hurry."

"It hurts…" Rind moaned softly as she weakly did as her sister told her, there was the soft muttering of the guttural Infernal language and then a golden beam spread out from the little eye-shaped mirror to cover most of Rinds burned body healing the worst of it to keep Rind alive.

"Now Rind, that's all I can do from here, now hurry! Finish the spell and bring down the barriers and I help you more." Sith implored.

"Yes… I can Oneesama…" Rind said softly as she unsteadily dragged and limped her abused body over to Kami-sama's imprisonment, and with badly blurred vision from her one partially restored eye tapped the three correct symbols on the outermost ring of the sphere of darkness, bringing about the final stage of the spell.

Kami-sama looked strait into the mirror that listlessly dangled from Rind's hand showing Sith's gold-tinged demonic face and said contemptuously, "You won't get away with this Sith, one of the others will stop you, then I'll see you rot in a galactic nexus for Eternity!"

Sith's image smirked as she watched the final phase of her spell take place, as a dark portal to a location in deep-space opened bellow the prison sphere and slowly began to swallow it and Kami-sama inside. Still wearing her smirk she said, "Oh, and who pray-tell will stop me, oh great high holy one? Your Ex-wife Hild? Maybe the new wife… Freyja? That Halfling brat, Urd? Oh I know! Maybe it'll be your precious perfect Belldandy and her human boyfriend that'll stop the revolution?! Ha… as if. No Tyr, I don't think so…"

Just before the portal closed, Kami-sama shouted, "Sith, if you so much as lay one talon on Belldandy I'll…" HE was cut-off as the portal closed

"You'll do nothing…" the image of Sith said contemptuously, she then softened and said to Rind, "Wonderful, simply wonderful little sister, I'm so proud of how you've handled yourself, this was the hard part… now please bring down the Asgard barrier, and I'll help you… and together we'll help our people and end the conflict!"

Through her pain and burns Rind couldn't help but feel elated at her elder sisters praise as she dragged her body towards Kami-sama's control center saying dazedly, "Yes… thank you… help… sister… help all of us…"

Unseen by Rind, as she just couldn't really see much, was the look of mad anticipation on the image of Sith's face in the mirror as she thought, 'One down… one to go.' as Rind hobbled her way to the floating column-like desk…

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In the early-noon time sunnily lit veranda room of the Nekomi Temple there was silence, absolute silence. The kind of silence that puts a person on edge, nervous as to what horror may soon befall them. The silence was especially worrisome given the occupants of the room. To one side of the long low-table sat the Three Norn Goddess', to the other side sat the Grand Daimakaicho Hild and her lackey du-jour; Mara.

Urd sat with her arms crossed across her chest and a scowl marring her eternally good looks as she stared at the white haired woman that coincidentally was her mother, as Hild lounged, not a care in the world, her elbow propped-up on the table with her palm supporting her madly grinning face as she looked towards her wayward daughter and absently twiddled with her black ravens feather earring.

Belldandy sat primly in worry of her big sis' occasionally looking up from her cooling cup of darjeeling tea at the spectacle of the two white-haired women fighting a silent battle of wills.

Skuld sat oblivious to most of her surroundings as she tried to cram a basketball sized knot of multi-colored wires and circuit chips into a blue and green baseball sized sphere… thing-a-ma-bob… of some sort that had a big red button on the top and an orange glass piece on the side.

Oh, and Keiichi was there too… he really didn't have a clue, all that really registered was that he was surrounded on all sides by some of the most gorgeous specimens of female pulchritude to exist in three planes of existence.

So he did what came naturally: He sweated copiously awaiting some measure of doom to befall him. It always did; why would this time be any different?

Finally the eerie silence of the house was broken by the sound of a flush, and then the sink running followed by the process of gurgle, rinse, spit; repeat. Soon the seated parties were witness to a much refreshed looking onna-Ranma as she sauntered into the veranda room and unceremoniously plopped down next to Hild, opposite side of Mara.

Ranma, not caring about the built-up tension in the room, turned to Hild and asked with a frown, "So, Hild-mama, what are we doin' here in this dump? You said that we'd be going back to Nerima."

Hild, without taking her eyes off of Urd said casually, "Did I say that? No… I'm fairly certain I said we'd come back to Japan… and why would you want to go to Nerima anyway, daughter?"

For a moment Ranma shook and clenched her jaw, then relaxed and said, "You know why, I wanna' get back at those… those…" she ended in a growl.

Hild leisurely sat up, spared a glance at Urd who looked like she was about to explode and nonchalantly answered Ranma, "Oh, they're not in Nerima anymore."

"What. Do. You. Mean. They're. NOT. In. Nerima." Ranma ground-out.

Hild's smirk became absolutely devious as she said, "Oh, well that… Seems that your former family and friends are guests of the Emperor as tomorrow, He himself will be presiding over your funeral with full state honors. Just look for yourself; you're quite the celebrity now."

And with that the small television in the corner of the room snapped to life with snow that settled into a picture, and Ranma couldn't help but have her jaw drop as she saw himself in the upper lefthand of the screen and a commentator in the rest of the screen.

Belldandy, finally broached Hild asking, "Excuse me, Hild-san, what exactly is this about? I mean, you with Mr… erm… ah… that is… Miss Ranma and all…"

Hild turned her gaze from Belldandy and looked more towards Urd and said, "Ranma-chan was murdered by her family, that you know from the human news networks, what I know is that Ranma's mother bartered his soul for a wish from a shikima…" Belldandy gasped and Urd winced at that, "… and so, understandably Ranma wants just a little teeny bit of revenge."

Keiichi butted-in, asking, "But what's with the 'Hild-mama' and you calling her 'daughter' and you saying she's Urd's sister?"

Hild rolled her eyes and said, "Isn't it obvious? I adopted dear Ranma-chan to help her."

"Bullshit." That epithet came from Urd, "…what are you planning, anyways? It's just not like you to just take in strays like this."

"What I can't do something nice for a poor tortured soul, just out of the goodness of my heart?" Hild said derisively unabashed, as Urd rolled her eyes and as Belldandy choked on her tea.

Without missing a beat, Urd whipped over to Ranma who was still intently staring at the TV and asked the redhead, "And what about you, how can you just trust her like this?"

Ranma turned her attention away from the TV, looked at Urd and said, "What? Hild-mama is really pretty nice, a lot nicer than a lota' people I could name, so why wouldn't I trust her?" The three sisters and Keiichi simply boggled at this honest statement.

Then, before things could escalate further between Urd and her new 'sister' Ranma, the outside door to the room slid open, revealing an extremely short decrepit looking bald man in a purple martial artists Gi.

Mara was whipping her head back and forth looking between the new arrival and the stunned look on his face, and then to the hate filled visage of Ranma quaking in her seat.

Finally the tableau was broken to Ranma's inarticulate cry of, "HAPPOSAI! I'll Kill you!" as she then proceeded to leap from her seat, handspringing from the table, vaulting over Skuld, to land a surprised kick to the abdomen of Happosai with enough force that he rocketed back through the doorway and out into the open courtyard, where he landed softly in a low crouch.

He looked up to see Ranma slowly stalking forward towards him, her eyes hidden by her bangs of red hair as she said, "You let them… you sat there and let them kill me, cause of that, I'm gonna' enjoy takin' ya' apart, ya' old freak."

Lizasa in the form of Happosai said hastily, "Ranma my boy, this isn't what it seems. Now, I'm sure we could talk this out if you'll just…"

He was cut off by Ranma's shout of, "Happosai, because of you I've seen and felt true Hell!" Ranma then leapt towards Happosai with her fists clenched together raised overhead and intending to bash them over his head, when suddenly her foreword momentum was halted jarringly.

Belldandy, then stepped forward her right hand held high directing the bubble of soft blue light that now surrounded Ranma floating in the air. She then said to Ranma, "I cannot condone this… this… violence in this temple when you don't have all the facts." She then turned away from Ranma and faced the faux-Happosai and commanded him, "Show her. Now."

Lizasa breathed a slight sigh of relief as he looked up to Ranma suspended in the light blue sphere of light as she glared murderous intent at him. He then relaxed and in a puff of gray smoke the short, bald purple clad form of Happosai was replaced by a tall bishonen man, with gray hair wearing a hakama in various shades of gray and white.

"He's a spirit…" Mara said in soft surprise as she leaned out of the veranda room into the courtyard to see, with Hild just quietly watching behind her shoulder with one delicate white eyebrow raised.

From inside the soft blue bubble of light Ranma asked, "I don't get it, what are ya' playing at ya' old freak?!"

The revealed Lizasa was about to speak, when Belldandy spoke for him saying soothingly, "Ranma, this man is actually Lizasa Lenaoko, a spirit sent to grant a dying wish. As he explained, the original Happosai died in the cave your father and Soun Tendo buried him in. So… you've never really met the original Happosai, instead you only know him… this spirit Lizasa, who rather foolishly sought the best way to fulfill the last wish of Happosai was to… um… 'become'… Happosai…"

Belldandy was suddenly cut-off by Ranma interjecting harshly, "Okay then, so why can't I kill him if he was the one all along just sittin' in a different skin?"

Lizasa paled at those words, as did the goddess'.

For a moment he just stared ahead, then he closed his eyes took a calming breath and then approached the capturing sphere, and on bowed knee spoke, "Ranma-sama, the event of your death, was a moment of several fates coming together, in such an event I could not have interfered without dire consequences. To say 'I'm Sorry' is too light an excuse, I do feel as though I failed you in that time of pain. I had already decided that you were the Best possible Martial Artist to inherit the School of Anything Goes; In penance, and in fulfilling the original wish of Happosai, I grant you the entirety of the Anything Goes Arts and will abide by what fate you might see fit for me for my transgression."

Ranma, looked down at the bowed figure of Lizasa and felt her hate of this man deflate down to a semi-rational level at his selfless adherence to Bushido and his giving unto her the Art she loved so much she lived and breathed it.

Belldandy, seeing and feeling the dark feelings and hostile intent slacken and fade-off of Ranma, lowered her and dispelled the sphere. Ranma glanced back to the goddess and gave a polite, but curt nod.

She then said to the bowed Lizasa, "I 'preciate ya' givin' me the Art… I earned it anyway 'cause I'm, like ya said, The Best, but I still 'preciate it. But I certainly ain't ever gonna' go and forgive ya…"

Lizasa closed his eyes and nodded his head expecting as much.

"… but I'm thinkin' that I also ain't gonna kill ya'…"

Lizasa's head snapped up looking at Ranma with wide-eyed surprise.

"…Though by the time I'm through with ya, ya might'a wished I had…" Ranma gave the man a malicious smirk that Hild approved of, and continued, "…Instead I'm gonna' have ya' train me and anyone else I choose, till I say stop. Capiche?"

He just nodded his acceptance in defeat, knowing there was no point in trying to argue, especially not since the Daimakaicho herself was staring him down with a manic grin.

'Well, Lizasa you old dummy, you're fucked now…' he thought sourly.

"There's still just one more thing still, so stand up." she said to the still kneeling Lizasa. He did so facing Ranma, she then held out her right hand with a grin on her face. Lizasa thinking the obvious began to reach out to shake it, when her hand blurred upwards, the flat back of her hand smacking the soft underside of his chin thus snapping his head back and causing a tooth to fly out of his mouth when her other hand shot forwards right into his belly, sinking deeply into the pliant flesh, causing Lizasa to fall to his knees and heave blood, bile and breathe, as she removed her fist.

"Consider –That- the first installment of pain, for ya' pretendin' to be a perverted asshole to me an' the Tendo's for the last couple o' years ya' freak… and practice starts tomorrow mornin'. Sharp." Ranma spat at the crumpled gasping form of Lizasa.

She then spun-around on her heels, mock dusting her hands, and came face to face with Urd, a very unhappy looking Urd. In fact, Urd looked pissed. The pulsing vein visible on her forehead was a good indicator of this fact.

"What in all of Father's creation is wrong with you! He submitted to you and you still beat him up with such low blows! I can't believe you… you… Spore!"

As Belldandy, Skuld and Keiichi looked on pensively, and Hild and Mara looked on the scene approvingly, Ranma raised a single red-eyebrow and asked curiously, "-Spore-?"

Urd snorted superiorly and said, "Why of course! We goddess' measure age in Era's and epochs! Skuld is our youngest and she's still a 'Squirt'. But if you're going to be my 'sister' as mother says… why that makes you just barely alive by our standards… a veritable –Spore- of a fledgling, you Spore!"

"So what yer' saying' is that yer' really really old, right?" Ranma drawled out slowly, and Skuld had to clap her hands over her mouth to keep from laughing out loud as Urd went purple in rage.

Belldandy sighed softly to herself, seeing as how –someone- had to act like a responsible adult and stop this, and seeing as how Hild seemed perfectly content to sit back and watch, she took the initiative and reached out and softly grasped Urd's shoulder from behind just as Urd was saying, "You little insignificant piece of…"

"Urd, let it go, she's just trying to make you madder, please…" Belldandy implored. Urd just looked over her shoulder at her sister and sighed a calming sigh and began to walk away. But before Urd was out of earshot though, she looked back over her shoulder at Ranma and said with a snort, "Welcome to the Universes oldest dysfunctional family -Spore-."

Belldandy then turned a tentative smile towards a Ranma scowling at the retreating backside of Urd, she then asked cheerily, "It's almost lunchtime, are you and… um… Hild-san and Mara-san be staying?"

Ranma just shrugged her shoulders and said," I 'spose so, would haft'a ask Hild-mama to be sure though, but luch sounds good." Ranma began walking to the temple house and paused almost brushing against Belldandy and asked with a grin, "Anyone ever tell you, that you're cute when you smile?"

Blushing, Belldandy cupped her cheek with her hand in memory of Keiichi-san telling her of her cute smile, she then said dreamily, "Why yes, yes I have been told so..."

"Good thing that…" Ranma said lazily as she walked on, but not before Belldandy felt a hand graze and lightly lift her right butt cheek under her dress.

With shocked-wide eyes, Belldandy whipped around… to face nothing, no sight of Ranma anywhere, only Keiichi and Skuld who seemed to of missed the exchange, softly she said to herself with both hands on her face cheeks. "Oh my…"

From inside the house, sat Hild with her lips pressed in thin a tight and tight line at an unforeseen development, then ever-so slowly her grin split her face as she thought, 'Why Belldandy, you naughty girl…' her thoughts were then interrupted by a poking at her side and an annoying beeping sound, turning her head she saw two little red eyes of a little robotic man wearing a black hat, poking her side with a stick. 'But first things first for being so rude…' she thought to herself staring down at Banbei…

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In the deepest, darkest, most fabled and foreboding region of China, barely touched by the hands of time or man, in the pre-dawn's light three road-weary travelers sat comfortably, in the rear of a rickety freight truck as it sped its way at breakneck speeds over the rough roads of the inland passes.

Next to a wooden crate that jumped and skittered with the trucks rickety movements leaned a jet-black haired young man in soot stained white robes as he snored lightly, across from him sat a wide awake and seemingly anxious purple-haired woman with slight amounts of soot and gasoline splotches on her green floral patterned silk pantsuit, and atop another crate was perched a shriveled and desiccated woman-thing in green robes staring off into space as she periodically clenched and unclenched her jaw.

After an interminable amount of time and kilometers, the purple-haired beauty spoke softly to the elder-woman in a rare dialect of chinese, ""What'll happen when we get back to the village great-grandmother?""

The elder gave a raspy "Hmmm." In thought then spoke in a voice telling her years, ""I suspect nothing Shampoo. Your honor and the pride of the village has been restored through the Pledge of the Kiss of Death… even though you didn't have a hand directly involved in the process… So I suppose life will return to a semblance of what we might consider normal."" she finished with a horrifying smirk.

Shampoo considered this for a moment, her thoughts only being interrupted by the sound of a air-machine fly overhead, when the corners of her lips turned up in a smile and she spoke clearly pleased in chinese, ""Ah… I see…""

"You've been unusually quiet since we left the boat at the port on the yellow-river, Shampoo…" the elder paused to look thoughtfully down at the girl, then smirking rasped-out "… so, a yuan for your thoughts?"

Shampoo nodded her head and slowly asked, ""Great-grandmother, why didn't we at least try to help Ranma? You've told me of many things that could've captured a soul before going off to the land of the dead. Then we could've used many magics to bring Husband back home, with no-one in Nerima any wiser.""

The next thing Shampoo knew was pain in the top of her head from Cologne striking her head with the staff.

Cologne sighed and said patronizingly, ""Shampoo, that is a possibility I would never consider in the case with former son-in-law. His soul was marked by evil demons. And we Amazons have survived for more than 3,000 years simply because we do NOT meddle with demons. We do not attract their attention, thus their wrath. Ever. Do you see?""

""I see…" Shampoo said softly rubbing the growing know atop her head.

Cologne sensing there was something else asked, ""Something else troubles you, does it?""

The younger woman nodded and easily hid her blush in the darkness and said, ""I was thinking of Lubri, actually…"

Cologne raised an eyebrow in surprise and rasped, ""Lubri… as in Lubri Keent in the next village over from ours?" seeing the purple hair girl nod, she said back with a smirk, "Just be careful with that one Shampoo, she's a slippery one, doubly so since I got word that she willingly bathed herself in Nannichuan...""

""I know! She's all the better now that she's like how Ranma was!"" bubbled Shampoo happily at the prospect of a dual-gendered paramour.

Cologne nodded wordlessly in understanding; pleased that some of her teachings were finally beginning to show through the often brash and naïve warrior maiden seated below her.

With that the rest of the ride was spent quietly, until the truck slowed to a stop, there was the sound of the drivers door being slammed shut, then the driver rapped on the side-door of the cargo-box as he opened it to reveal the morning light on the three Amazons, and said in a smokers rasp, ""End of the line folks, no good roads go up to them villages yer headin' to…"

Cologne hopped down and said kindly in her aged rasp, ""Thank you for the ride Mr. Jang, at my age, I was not looking forward to a long hike back home."

""Aw… think nothin' of it ma'am, t'was the least I could do…" Mr. Jang the burly muscle-bound driver said kindly embarrassed scratching the back of his head as he walked back to the cab.

With that Shampoo kicked Mousse awake to which he mumbled, "I'm up… I'm up…" as he pinched the bridge of his nose where his glasses usually sat and re-shouldered his pack as Cologne and Shampoo did the same.

After almost 4 kilometers of uphill hiking the three came to within sight of the Joketsuzoko Amazon village gates, when Shampoo noticed a tall machine in the middle of the village, ""Look great-grandmother! Black wings!"

Cologne noticed them too, and didn't like it one bit as she implored, ""Hurry children, the village needs us!""

They then quickened their pace and were soon in the village proper and noticed all the villagers crowded together around a large black military helicopter with swords drawn.

Looking past the crowd, Cologne saw the regional liaison, the 50-ish Minister Den-Shur sitting calmly on a wood bench a short distance from the helicopter, the insufferable slimy man flanked by two armed guards.

Hopping over to the blue business-suit clad bureaucratic weasel, Cologne forced a smile onto her face as she said, "Minister Den-Shur, what a pleasant, and unexpected surprise. To what does this village owe this visit?"

"Cut the ass-kissery Cologne, it doesn't suit you; I'm here on international business…"

Cologne stiffened at that, and made a feint thumb motion across her neck, the result was immediate as the leaves in the trees overhead rustled, and a orange-haired beauty fell from the high trees, doing two summersaults in midair before landing in a crouch one meter in front of Den-Shur, she then pushed a bottle labeled 911 into the crevice of her cleavage and coyly finger-waved the Minister as she turned and trotted away with a good bounce.

Cologne noticing Den-Shur's eyes moving in rhythm to the sway of the retreating girls bottom, cleared her throat and asked, ""I believe you said something about business?""

""Ah yes, business… even though I'd much rather enjoy the lovely and lush scenery of this area… there is business afterall…" Den-Shur said with a leer. He continued, ""As you know there's been quite the uproar in Japan since Ranma Soatome died, so much so that the Emperor has become involved as I understand it. And my superiors in Beijing received this, this morning and telefaxed it to my office along with my orders."

With that he pushed a sheaf of papers across the bench for Cologne to inspect them, after several minutes of quiet reading, the aged crone gasped and said, ""The Japanese Emperor requests us to come… by name?!"

""Yes, most unusual isn't it? But those are my orders, and while I'm offered much lee-way in usual affairs, in this I must comply… so will you come peacefully?""

""And if we didn't come peacefully?" Cologne ventured.

Den-Shur looked grim for a moment and replied, ""Well, you could resist… use that formula 911 you all are so fond of, or some other dastardly thing from 3,000 years of Amazon culture… but I think given the circumstances such… resistance that would put our nation in a bad international light… would make this little valley a prime new target for nuclear test drops, after all, the big-wigs in Beijing are always looking for scarcely populated areas to test in."" he finished with a nasty grin.

Quickly Cologne realized his threat was not a hollow one, that their little corner of China had gotten a lot of attention by the PRC lately with all the martial activities between Ranma the Musk and the Phoenix tribes, and that the Generals would hop on a chance to nuke several 'problems' all at once…

Tired and hungry, Cologne said in a resigned tone with her eyes closed, ""Shampoo, Mousse, get in the helicopter, we're going back to Japan.""

Shampoo squawked and whined, "But we just got back!"

Cologne whipped her staff around and clonked Shampoo on her head and hissed, ""Now is not a time for whining! Now do as you're told!""

""Yes great-grandmother…" Shampoo said quietly as she and Mousse walked over to the helicopter.

Cologne then gave a slight wave of her hand and the assembled Amazons dissipated back to their daily routines, and then began her pogo'ing to the helicopter, then stopped to look over her shoulder at Den-Shur right behind her and said, "For all your heavy-handed tactics, and political weaseling, even if you managed to worm your way to be Prime Minister, you're still a failure, Den-Shur."

Den-Shur just gave Cologne a sickly smile and said in a false sweet voice, ""Gee, I love you too mom…""

Cologne just groaned in irritation, again wishing that Den-Shur had ended up as just another wet spot on the bed sheets as she thought about what might be happening back in Japan that the Emperor would request her by name…

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Back in Nekomi at a certain temple, the noon-time repast had past quietly tense as the goddess', demoness', spirit and mortal man had enjoyed simple, hastily prepared sandwiches.

As Belldandy was sipping at some tea, she couldn't help but to gaze fondly at Keiichi, she then noticed he was looking at something across the table… she tracked his line of sight, and her eyes met the profound bosoms of Ranma.

Without being noticeable she looked down at her own bosom and felt… a twinge of something… she then looked back to Ranma's… endowments, then to how Keiichi's gaze was locked to the still obliviously eating Ranma.

Belldandy then felt another twinge of emotion, she was sure it was an emotion, just not sure which one, and suddenly a flower vase behind her exploded violently.

"What was that!?" Ranma exclaimed in surprise at seeing a vase just go Boom!

Still chewing, Mara said casually, "Keiichi and Belldandy were staring at your tits. So Belldandy got jealous, I'd say."

"Yeah, I guess they're pretty impressive, ne?" Ranma said striking a pose for Keiichi that just happened to put strain in the cloth of her shirt… the results of such being Keiichi passing out with a nose-bleed as the rest of his blood left his head…

Urd chose this same moment to laugh and say, "Those? Ha! Now me, on the other hand am beyond compare, nothing like you're little…" Urd didn't have to finish her sentence.

For a moment Ranma appraised Urd's physique and then said, "Yeah, I guess yer' alright… especially since you were flat as a board as a kid…"

"What did you say?" Urd growled out slowly.

"In Hild-mama' palace I had to raid yer closet for somethin' to wear, and with all the black and pink lace, it was all too small for me, if you know what I mean…" Ranma wagged her eyebrows in meaning.

"You were in my room!!" Urd shrieked, she then rounded on Hild, "You let her in my room and touch MY things!" she shrieked again with enough force to blow the Daimakaicho's hair back slightly.

"What? You've not used your room for millennia… I should have cleaned it out eons ago really…" Hild said calmly.

"But… but… it's my room…" Urd muttered softly to herself sadly with a little cloud of her depression over her head.

"feh… boobs…" Skuld remarked to herself, disgustedly.

"Heh, don't worry kiddo, they're kinda' something you gotta' have first to be able to really 'preciate. But you still got time to fill out some I guess." Ranma mockingly, causing Mara to fall backwards howling with laugher at the antics, and cause Skuld to go beet-red with embarrassment, as Lizasa choked as tea went down the wrong pipe.

"Belldandy…" Hild spoke gain the goddess's attention as she was watching over Keiichi, "… there's no need to get jealous, Keiichi isn't Ranma's 'type'. Isn't that right Ranma?"

"Keiichi? The twerp? Ew, heck no…" Ranma said. Belldandy internally was relieved.

"Naw, Belldandy is more my speed…" the red-head continued causing Belldandy's head to snap-up and look on in surprise, "… I mean she's got that whole 'innocent girl next door' thing going for her, and all. Not that I'm lookin' or nothin'."

Hild chuckled slightly and Mara's laughing was renewed at the blush that painted Belldandy's face.

Suddenly there was the sound of a throat being cleared, it was Hild, once she was sure she had everyone's attention, even the partially revived Keiichi, she asked in a disgustingly cute voice, "Belldandy, could I ask you for one, teeny, weey, itty bitty, eency-weency little favour?" she emphasized this by pinching her forefinger and thumb only a paper thickness apart.

Belldandy looked at Hild, then at Urd who was standing behind Hild, waving her hands, mouthing the word "NO!" over and over, and pantomiming strangling herself.

Unsure of exactly what to do, Belldandy took the easy out and asked, "Why, what kind of favour Hild-san?"

"Oh, it's nothing really, it's just such a chore to go back to Niffelheim to have to then come back here tomorrow to attend Ranma's funeral, that I was thinking we, that is Ma-chan, Ranma-chan and I could spend the night here." Hild said with a broad smile at Belldandy.

Promptly there was the sound of Urd facevaulting behind Hild.

Slowly Belldandy asked, "You, want to spend the night here…"

Hild grinned and nodded enthusiastically.

"… in a temple…"

Again Hild nodded while grinning.

"… with Mara-san and Ranma-san…"

Hild's grin split her face as her head kept bobbing.

"… with us goddess', Keiichi-san and Lizasa-san."

Hild, still grinning said, "Why, yes that's just about it."

Belldandy was understandably nervous, The Daimakaicho wasn't someone that even a One-One Unlimited goddess said 'No' to lightly… but then again right behind Hild there was Urd pantomiming being stabbed in the heart repeatedly and next to her Skuld pantomiming being hung, along with Mara and Ranma just staring stupefied at the two goddess's stupidity.

After several seconds, Belldandly just smiled lightly and said, I suppose ONE night wouldn't hurt…"

The next thing Belldandy knew was Hild's squeal of delight and then being held in a crushing embrace as Hild said, "Oh! You're just like That Person! Bell-chan you're much too kind! It'll be just like a girls sleep over! Isn't that great!?"

Belldandy, seeing over Hild's shoulder at her two sisters faces firmly planted into the floor, and then Ranma, 'Is she my one/third step-sister now too?' was an absent thought, who was winking at her in a highly inappropriate way, Belldandy's smile became strained as her cheek wanted to twitch, but still in the Daimakaicho's embrace she mumbled "Just great…" as she wondered what could possibly happen next…

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Credit for "Den-Shur" aka "Denture" goes to Spokavriel of Fukufics forums.

I'd also like to thank Materia-Blade for essentially giving me the swift kick to the posterior to get this chapter posted. Sorry for the wait, I'll try to be fast on successive chapters.

I like reviews.