There's gonna be ONE more chapter after this one and then I'm done. Enjoy! I personally don't like this chapter very much. The only reason I wrote it is because if I didn't the next chapter wouldn't make as much sense.
A/N This takes place when Naruto and Sasuke are around 18 and Sasuke has returned to Konoha.
It was three days since Sasuke wrote that letter. He felt foolish; he had even mailed it! Of course, he wasn't hoping to get a reply. He just wanted to get some things off his chest. But he still missed Naruto badly. Once, while taking a walk, he saw Sakura and was about to ask if she'd seen Naruto. He had grown used to the blonde's presence during his strolls.
The thing that Sasuke did to annoy the villagers the most was the fact that he could act so nonchalant after his lover's death. He didn't show anyone anything that resembled sadness or remorse, except at the funeral but since everyone else was crying, no one noticed that the usually deadpan Uchiha was crying as well. The only times the villagers saw Sasuke showing any emotion was before the Uchiha massacre and, after that, when he was with Naruto. When asked, he coolly responded, "Oh? I couldn't tell".
But Sasuke didn't care what everyone else thought. In fact, it was that very quality that made Naruto and his relationship last. Sasuke knew ha had shown emotion around Naruto. But who else could he have shown it to? Sakura? The pink-haired bimbo would've used it as an excuse to say that they were "going out". Naruto was the only one who saw the other side of Sasuke: his gentle side. The side that came up and hugged you from behind. The side that held you close when you slept, as if to protect you from some unseen demons. The side that looked into your eyes and smiled, not the infamous Uchiha smirk, but a genuine smile. He reserved that special side for Naruto and Naruto alone.
But after Naurto's death, he became even more cold and withdrawn than usual. He took Kakashi's place as the one who visited the graveyard the most. Some mornings, Sasuke would wake up and find that he had been snuggling Naruto's pillow instead of the boy himself. It was time like that that caused him the most pain. Not a quick, fleeting pain, but a dull, throbbing one. He had once heard it been called "The Pain of Loss".
This "Pain of Loss" ate him up inside and slowly eroded away his sanity. Thoughts of suicide frequently plagued the Uchiha's head. He argued with himself:
The suicidal part said, "Don't you want to be relieved of your pain? Don't you want to see Naruto again?"
The gentle side explained, "Why should I take my own life? Even if i did, there's no guarantee that I'll see Naruto again. I've done too many stupid and awful things in my life to go where he is".
Unbeknownst to him, someone was listening to every word that went through that brain of his...