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It was amazing how quickly things could turn form unbelievably good to unbelievably bad. After my latest talk with Mou Hitori No Boku I was left with a pervading sense of contentment that was amplified by the calmness of my soul room. It seem to reflect my state of mind; the more agitate I became, the more haphazard the room seemed to be. Now it was peaceful, and relatively orderly. I sank down onto the bed and slept better than I had in years.
Unfortunately, all good things do seem to come to an end. School, the ever present dampener on my life, reared its ugly head once more. I barely managed to drag myself out bed that morning. Bleary-eyed, and slightly more disheveled than usual I dragged myself into the bathroom to brush my teeth. Fortunately nobody notices if I've dealt with my hair or not. It seems to have a mind of its own, and even if I do bother to try and tame it, it never ever lies flat.
I made a quick pit-stop in the kitchen to shovel some oatmeal into myself, before grabbing the lunch Grandpa had so kindly made for me, mumbling an incomprehensible thanks, followed by an equally indecipherable goodbye. I then trudged all the way to school, only to remember that my friends wanted to take my puzzle away, and separate Mou Hitori No Boku from me. If I hadn't been at school yesterday, I would have been sure it was a Monday.
I spent all my classes that day avoiding Téa, Joey and Tristan. A couple times they'd looked like they wanted to say something, but then turned around and thought better of it. Somehow, the fact that they couldn't seem to just up and talk to me, despite the fact that they clearly had something to say, was even worse than your standard silent treatment.
So, naturally, by the end of the day I'd managed to work myself up into quite the emotional huff, and I stormed out of the building. I went to the park, preferring quiet solitude to the company of my grandfather at the moment. I felt mildly guilty about this, as I really ought to have been giving him a hand with the store. Though, on the flip side, he'd probably notice that I was upset about something, and then force me to talk about it. Something I was desperately avoiding at the moment. Curse his uncanny perceptive abilities.
In the end I found myself at the park. It was autumn, and it had just begun to get chilly, so I was beginning to regret not having brought a jacket. I shivered slightly and wrapped my arms around my body in an effort to encourage warmth. I sat, staring blandly at the child-infested playground in front of me, slowly loosing feeling in my nose. On the whole, not one of my better days.
"Yug?" I heard Joey's tentative voice behind me. I jumped slightly, not having heard him approach, then looked at him cautiously. He seemed strangely demure, something I wasn't used to seeing in Joey. It was oddly comforting, while still managing to be disconcerting. At least it seemed like he didn't want to pick a fight, which was good.
"Hello Joey," I replied, not unkindly. He nodded and plopped down on the park bench next to me.
"I didn' wanna go home either," he said, by way of explanation. I nodded in acceptance, still staring at the playground, but not really seeing it.
"We're worried about ya, Yug."
That was quite possibly the last thing I wanted to hear. Despite it being meant to make me feel better it succeeded in more than making me feel worse. "Yeah," I said flatly.
"We're still your friends, right?" He sounded kind of nervous, and my anger seemed to dissipate at the tone he took.
"Yeah," I said, more softly this time. "Butso is Mou Hitori No Boku."
Joey frowned and looked like he wanted to argue, but seemed to think better of it. "I see."
"He's not evil," I said, overcome with the sudden urge to defend him. "And he's never hurt me."
"Yug, I'm not accusin' him of anyting, b'cause he's saved my butt an' I owe him da benefit of da doubt. But I agree wit Téa too. We don' know him Yug. We don' know a ting about him."
"I know what my heart tells me," I said firmly. "I know that he wouldn't hurt me. I know that he wants to keep me, and my friends, safe. I know that he never wants to go back to the puzzle. I know that it was horrible for him there, and I know that I'm not ever going to let him go back. He's my partner. He calls me Aibou, and he means it. We are two halves of the same whole, Joey, light and dark, partners of mind, soul and heart. That's enough for me, and I'd hoped it would be enough for you too."
"Your heart," repeated Joey faintly. "Yug, youse got the biggest heart of anyone dat I know."
"I'm sensing a 'but'," I said, grinning slightly at his words.
"But," he conceded, and grinned at me before going sombre again. "I dunno if its good enough for me, Yug. You said yourself he was dark. You didn' see him, when we was takin' out those thugs, wit his red eyes blazin' in fury. He looked like a demon, Yug." Joey shuddered slightly, though not just from the cold.
"You think I should take the puzzle off then?" I said flatly.
"I don' know, Yug. I don' know what you should do. But I don' wanna see you get hurt," he said, then shrugged helplessly. "Are we still friends?"
"I'm still your friend Joey," I said, my left hand coming up of its own accord to gently trace the puzzle, a gesture that didn't go unnoticed by him. "But I won't let anyone take Mou Hitori No Boku." And with that I stood up and walked away, trying desperately not to see the hurt in Joey's eyes.
I ran all the way home.
I think I tossed a brief "hello" in grandpa's direction before dashing upstairs and throwing myself onto the bed in full teenage angst fashion. I groaned in frustration, and buried my face in my pillow hoping that the lack of oxygen would help solve some of my problems. It didn't. I finally gave up my attempts to suffocate myself and rolled over onto my back. Right, so what I needed now were solutions to all my problems.
Oh, Mou Hitori No Boku, what do I do? I asked silently. I suppose, then, that I ought not to have been surprised when I felt a gentle tug on my mind in answer. After a few moments of surprised panic at the unexpected pronounced presence in my mind, I relaxed and allowed myself to be pulled back into the sanctuary that was my soul room.
He was sitting on the bed, on leg sprawled out in front of him, the other curled up to his body, knee in the air. His arm was draped lazily over his leg, and the other over the headboard of the bed. I blinked slightly at the unexpected sight. I don't think I'd ever seen Mou Hitori No Boku looking so at ease before. I must say, it was quite a magnificent sight. Something about his presence seemed to positively extrude calm confidence. I would kill too look like that, even just once, instead of gangly and shy. A voice that sounded suspiciously like Téa drifted through my head and remarked that perhaps he did kill to look like that. I promptly squashed it.
"You argued with your friends," he said simply. It wasn't a question. He seemed to accept my silence as an answer, as he continued, "about me."
"Yes."
"You defended me." Again, a statement, not a question. I wondered just how much he'd been listening to. "Thank you. I have no desire to separate you from your friends, nor cause arguments between you. But." I knew there was going to be a but in there somewhere. "I am… grateful, for your kindness."
"I meant what I said," I replied, sinking down on the opposite end of the bed, and sprawling out, though decidedly less gracefully. "I won't let us be separated, and I won't let you go back."
He looked startled for a moment, before casting me a scrutinizing glance. He seemed to find something that he was looking for in my expression, because he smiled. Genuinely, for the first time, he was fully smiling. The change in his demeanor was remarkable, his whole face seemed to light up, and a weight seemed to lift off his shoulders. For a moment I was certain I could see myself in him, but the smile faded and Mou Hitori No Boku returned so quickly that I was sure I'd just imagined it. Though, perhaps…
"What are you going to do about your friends?" he asked quietly.
I shrugged. "I have no idea. I spoke with Joey earlier." He nodded slightly, letting me know that he was aware. I nodded in return and continued, "he's right, of course. I don't know much about you." Mou Hitori No Boku looked away at that, and began to stare fixedly at the wall. "I would like to know more, though I understand that you're telling me what you can. But I meant what I said then too." He looked back at me questioningly. Perhaps he hadn't been listening to everything then. "I told Joey that it didn't matter how much about you that I knew, because I knew in my heart that you would never hurt me. You are my aibou, Mou Hitori No Boku, the partner of my mind, soul and heart, and if that doesn't give me unusual insight into your character than I don't know what does."
He nodded pensively. "But Joey still does not agree?"
"He's concerned that you're 'dark'," I mumbled, flopping back against the wall, suddenly exhausted.
"He is right, Aibou."
"I never said he wasn't," I replied sleepily. "But not all darkness is evil. Nighttime is dark, but that's no reason to fear it."
He was silent for a moment before I heard a quiet, wry chuckle. Well, I never! A chuckle, from Mou Hitori No Boku. I like to think I've been a good influence on him.
"If I were able to tell you more about me, would it please your friends?"
I looked at him in surprise. "Did you remember something?"
"No Aibou," he said sadly. "I was simply curious. I wish to make things between you and your friends right again, if I am able. I know you care for them deeply."
"I care for you deeply too, you know," I pointed out.
"I know," he said softly.
"And you remember nothing about your past?" I said gently. We'd rather skirted over the issue when it was brought up, and I was, admittedly, desperately curious about the state of his memories. I mean, when he said he didn't remember anything from before the puzzle, did that mean he wasn't even sure how long he'd been there? What did he remember from the puzzle itself? Fortunately, I refrained from voicing my torrent of questions. Somehow, I doubted Mou Hitori No Boku would appreciate it.
"No," he said shortly. He took in a deep breath, and I wondered if I'd made him angry with my question. "I remember nothing more than being in the puzzle, and in the dark, then being released by you." He looked at the wall again, pensively. He was perturbed though, I was beginning to get better at reading his emotions.
Still, it would be nice to know at least how old he was. Or why he was in the puzzle at all. Then, in one of those rare brilliant moments, it hit me.
Maybe Mou Hitori No Boku didn't know anything about himself, but I'll bet there was someone who did, and wrote it down. I remember grandfather telling me about the Millennium Puzzle, and surely such a well known artifact would have records? Carvings, writing, history textbooks. Surely somewhere it would mention the spirit of the puzzle! Maybe a legend of how he came to be. This could be the key to finding his past! I was practically bouncing with excitement now.
"Mou Hitori No Boku, we're going to the library," I said, grinning wildly.
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