Here it is, Neji in Spandex! Wahoo! I wrote this at 12:00 am, after drinking 4 sodas, so don't kill me.

Pairings: None!

Disclaimer: I'm tired of writing this ever chapter, I don't own Naruto, GEICO, the Macerena, the Kung-fu Hamster song, or the song about a farmer who had a dog named Bingo.

#7- Neji in Spandex

Neji woke up in the morning, having the worst migraine of the century. He felt like he was run over by 4 busses, 6 trucks, and an airplane. He groaned and got out of his bed, feeling like he was about to puke. He walked over to his mirror, looked in it, then started to go to the comfort room when he did a double take.

He was in green spandex.

Oh, dear.

-The night before-

Gai was taking his team to a bar to celebrate the fact that all 3 of his students had managed to pass the chunin exams, even if it did take 2 tries. So, he took them to a bar.

Not a very good idea.

Once at the bar, Gai came up with a masterful plan. He immediately left, ran to his house, closed all the doors, turned off all the lights, and laughed evilly as lightning crackled in the background.

Not really. But he did do this in his mind, though. He excitedly whispered to Lee "Lee, come over here."

"Yes, sensei?"

"I have an idea." Gai said evilly.

"Yosh, what is your wonderful and youth-"

"Shut up Lee!" Gai burst out.

Lee looked hurt "I'm sorry…"Lee mumbled, on the verge of tears.

Gai looked at his mini-me sadly. "It's ok. I understand."

"Gai-sensei!"

"Lee!"

"Gai-sensei!"

"Lee!"

Big rock, crashing waves, cheap music, blah blah blah, you know the drill.

Anywho, after that, Gai told Lee his wonderful idea.

Then, they put their plan into action. Gai went up to the counter to get them drink and something to eat while Neji, Lee, and Tenten went to get a table.

When Gai-sensei came back, he said, "Here's to your promotions!" He said, raising his glass after handing out everyone else's.

Just as he thought, all of them then chugged their entire glasses.

"That water burned." Neji said, putting down his now empty glass.

"Oh really?" Gai-sensei asked.

"Ya…" Neji said looking into space.

"Well, I'm going to get us some more water." Gai said, hoping up.

Lee was trying his hardest not to laugh, while Tenten just looked at the 2 of them, wondering what was wrong with them. Luckily, Gai came back and handed out more water, or so what Neji thought was water.

Neji then chugged the other glass of what he thought was water. It was becoming quit obvious that it was not water. For one thing, Neji's face was flushed, and he had a just-got-laid smile on his face.

Lee and Gai barley were able to hold their fits of hysterical laughter down. Tenten just looked between the 3, then sighed. It was going to be a long night.

"Want some more water, Neji?" Lee asked, about to burst out laughing.

He didn't answer. They took that as a yes.

-6 glasses of water later-

Lee and Gai didn't even try to hold down their laughter anymore. Neji was basically high. He ran all over the bar, challenging random guys to fights.

They laughed, then slapped each other high five, when a menacing shadow came over them.

They gulped, then looked up. There was Tenten, looking down on them with her you-are-so-going-to-get-it look. It was not pretty.

"What did you give him?" She asked angrily.

"Water." Gai-sensei replied, hugging Lee while trembling.

"Water would not make him do that." She said, pointing at Neji, who was now attempting to run while standing on a barstool. The stool spun around in circles, while he did not, looking like one of those idiots who just keep running and running and not getting anywhere…

"Ummm…." Gai said, while trying to keep himself from laughing. No suck luck. He and Lee both burst into laughter, pounding their fists against the table.

"Ugh! You guys are hopeless!" Tenten yelled, throwing her hands up in the air. Then, she stormed out of the bar.

Lee and Gai simply looked after her, then at eachother, then burst out in laughter again.

"Lee, I know what we should do now!" Gai-sensei cried.

-In the boys bathroom-

"Get him!" Gai cried, pointing at Neji, who was running around in circles singing while wearing nothing but his boxers. It was a very funny sight.

Yep, you guessed it, and if you didn't pretend you did, they were trying to get Neji to put on the dreaded Spandex suit.

That's when it all started.

"Screw this…" Gai-sensei mumbled, pulling a BAR (Ballistic Assault Riffle) and shot Neji in the head. He died. Boo-hoo.

Not really.

"Lee, hold it open!" Gai screamed, then picked up Neji. Neji kicked and screamed things nobody could understand, while trying to stuff him into the suit.

At this moment, Sasuke realized that Orichimaru was a gay wad, and came home to Konaha. However, it was a long journey, and he had to go tinkle. He should have gone before he left, but did he? No. So, he looked around, and saw a bar. Hopefully, it would have a bathroom. He ran in and asked the bartender, "Where is the bathroom?" He pointed to the left; Sasuke said thanks and ran to the bathroom.

Once he got in, however, he saw Gai holding a kicking, screaming Neji around the waist, trying to stuff him into a green Spandex suit that Lee was holding.

He turned and left. Orichimaru wasn't that bad…

Gai and Lee lied on the floor, panting, while a still very drunk, very high, very in Spandex Neji skipped around singing about a guy who had a dog named Bingo…

"Good work Lee. We have succeeded in putting Neji in the suit."

"Gai-sensei!"

"Lee!"

"Gai-sensei!"

"Lee!"

"Gai-sensei!"

"Neji!"

"Lee!"

"Neji!"

"Gai-sensei!"

"Lee and Neji!"

Hug, sunset, big rock, cheap music…

Suddenly, the music stopped playing, the lights came back on, and Lee and Gai's eyes snapped open.

"Did Neji just…?"

"Ya… I think he did."

The 3 looked at eachother, Neji smiling idiotically, Gai and Lee looking confused.

(A/N- About who said what back there- Lee said the 1st and 2nd Gai-sensei, and the Neji after his name, Gai said the 1st and 2nd Lee, the Neji after his name, and the Lee and Neji, and Neji said the 3rd and last Gai-sensei and the Lee in between his name. You probably didn't get that but…)

The trio then calmly left the bathroom, left the bar, then walked to the busiest street in Konaha. Then, Neji started to sing.

"Everybody was kung-fu fighting HIYA Those cats was as fast as light…ning"

(A/N- Like in the GEICO commercial. … Don't own GEICO… Didn't own it in chapter 1, don't own it now...)

Neji noticed that everyone was just staring at him. He stopped.

Than everyone in Konaha started singing that song.

At this moment, Sasuke decided that even Neji being forced into Spandex wasn't as bad as staying with this gay wad. So, he left Oto, and came back to Konaha.

However, the first thing he saw was everyone in Konaha singing the Kung-fu Hamster song, led by Neji, wearing green Spandex. He turned and went back to Orichimaru…

Finally, the song ended, and everyone resumed their nightly activities.

"Now what?" Lee asked.

"We-" Gai-sensei started before

"Oh! Oh! Pick me! Pick me!" Neji yelled, jumping up and down.

"Yes, Neji?"

"Where do babies come from?"

Gai looked shocked. "Ho boy."

-1 explanation later-

"And that's where babies come from." Gai finished, looking proud that he had just explained such a difficult subject. Without losing his dinner.

Lee and Neji sat there, twitching.

"You just had to ask…" Lee whispered.

"I want to go to the park!" Neji screamed, already getting over the "explanation".

So, they went to the park.

"Higher!" Neji screamed to Gai, who was pushing on the swings.

Gai pushed the swing so hard, he flipped the swing. Neji fell out at the top, hit his head on the metal bar, then fell to the floor. Then, the swing came around, and hit Neji in the back of his head. Then, it swung back again, and hit him in the face. This continued for quite some time, Neji just sobbing like a baby.

Gai and Lee were like: -.-

Eventually, Neji got up, and went over to the slide.

He kicked it.

Then he hopped up and down, crying. Then he abruptly stopped.

Then he started doing the Macerena.

Lee and Gai were like: O.o And people called them weird and random. Of course, they weren't drunk…

Then, Neji just dropped unconscious.

The Green Beasts of Konaha just sighed. It had been fun while it lasted…

-Where we started-

Neji finally manage to get out of the stupid suit, with destroying it. Yes, WITH destroying it, then marched over to the training grounds. Lee and Gai were so going to get it…

Yep, that's it. My longest chapter yet! Party music plays, streamers and confetti falls, and all Naruto characters come out

Me: Now everybody! Please…

Everybody: Stay off of the grass, shine your shoes, wipe your… face

Me: NO! PLEASE REVIEW!

Everyone: Oh…

Next up: FOOTBALL! I'm not updating till I get 10 reviews! I mean it this time!