Disclaimer: Yummy! I get to eat gum! Do you have gum? No, I don't think you do! Ha! Oh yeah. This is a disclaimer isn't it? Well, of course I didn't invent gum! Duh!
Okay, Lace and i wrote this chapter together. I was going to write it alone, bu then I wrote some, showed it to Lace in study hall, she wanted to write some, I let her, and liked it better then what I wrote. Then she started writing it more 'cause she wanted to gosh darn it until she got writer's block. The I finished it off. We both wrote about hallf and it was my idea completly so I so have rights to this chapter! Just clearing that up... Oh, and what I wrote is in italics and Lace's is in plain text.
The Alimighty Monkey Lord!
-In the background, ther is flames and everything has been burnt to the ground-
Narrator: This all began because of one person. One. That's all it took. You gettin' my drift? ONE! ONE! THAT'S ALL!!
- The narrotor is taken away cause I (Aka: Boo) am a lunatic and was the narrator, but I did say one last thing 'cause I'm special like that-
Boo (while being dragged away by two big men in white): IT WAS... THE MONKY LORD!! Fear him!
-I am now gone-
Monkey Lord: That is right! You must fear me! MU HA! -starts coughing- HA HA -gets into a wild coughing fit- HA!!
Scene Change!
-At the Cullens', before the Monkey Lord came-
Rosalie: Hey! You stole my blood brownie! Give it back!
Alice (blows a raspberry at Rosalie): No! It's mine now! You can't have it! Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah Nah!
Bella (now a newborn vampire): BLOOD?! WHO SAID BLOOD?! I WANT BLOOD! GIMME SOME BLOOOOOOOD!!
Edward: No my love. I am sorry, but during the newborn phaze, I am afraid that you cannot eat anything. Then you would be non-"vegitarian"ishness.
Bella: KISS MY ASS YOU SON-OF-A-BITCH!
Edward: I am beautiful, aren't I?
Rosalie: I sense... a disruption... in the world...
Emmett: That can only mean one thing...
Bella: Ooh! The Monkey Lord!
-round of applause-
-lightning cracks-
-Monkey Lord appears-
-All dumbfounded-
-Rosalie steals back blood brownie-
Alice: Hey!
Rosalie: I AM A KNIGHT WHO SAYS NI!!
Alice: Oh Noeys! Not Ni!
Rosalie: Ni Ni!
Alice: No!
Rosalie: Ni Ni!
Alice: Sto-
Monkey Lord: I AM STILL HERE!! Gosh!
-Lace suddenly appears with Jasper-
Lace: STALKERS OF THE MONKEY LORD! UNITE!
Jasper: Unite!
...
Lace: Boo? Hello? Boo?
Rosalie: She was taken to the Looney Farm.
Lace: Okay Then.
Bella: OK!
Edward: OK!
Jasper: Ni!
-All besides Lace and the Monkey Lord scream-
-Jasper looks up at sky-
Jasper: Well I'll be! Betcha there'd be a storm a comin' yonder!
Lace: 'Ell 'ats just shiky!
Bella: British!
Edward: Scottish!
Bella: British!
Edward: Scottish!
Rosalie: DUMBLEDORE!
Alice: Herrrmonie!
Jasper: From my piont of view, I betcha Lace's speakin' Crocidile hunter language. I betcha.
Lace: Yup! I'm speakin' Crocidile hunter language!
Emmett: OMFC! I SEE A BIRDY! BYE! TTYL!
Rosalie: My, my.
Alice: SAVE THE BIRDS!
-Alice charges after Emmett with a bazooka cuz she's cool like that and can-
-Monkey Lord randomly walks away to cause terror-
-Boo has been released from the looney farm and immeadiatly comes rushing back-
Boo: STAKLERS OF THE MONKEY LORD! UNITE!!
Jasper: He just left.
Boo:WHO CARES?! UNITE!!
Lace: Unite!
Jasper: Unite!
Emmett (who is back because Alice got hungry (because Rosalie stole back he blood brownie) and gave up on saving the birds so she could drink their blood) : Unite!
Jasper: Emmett. You are not part of the stalkers-of-the-monkey-lord group. You must go away.
-Boo konks jasper on the head in defense of her love, Emmett-
-Lace punches Boo for hitting her love, Jasper-
-Boo ignores Lace-
-Lace gets pissed off-
-Boo still ignores Lace-
-Lace gets even more pissed off-
Jasper: Ow! What the Hell?!
Boo: Let Emmett join!
Jasper: Let me consult my love, Lace.
Lace: No.
-Boo konks Lace on the head-
Lace: Ow! Fine!
Emmett: Yay Boo! I love you! Yay!
Rosalie (finishing off blood brownie): Hey Emmett! I thought you loved me!
Alice (Just realizing what Jasper said about Lace): Yeah Jasper! What The Hell?!
Emmett & Jasper: Nah, we moved on cuz you guys are ugly.
-Monkey Lord comes back while everyone is fighting because a) the stalkers-of-the-monkey-lord have united and b) because The Monkey Lord finds it amusing to watch people and/or vampiress fight-
-fighting stops abruptly-
Monkey Lord: Damn! NO MORE AMUSEMENT! Oh well. COME MY FOLLOWERS! We must Destroy the Cullens! Emmett, Boo'll teach you since your a new member and all.
Emmett: Okay! Yay Boo!
-The Stalkers-of-the-monkey-lord destroy the rest of the cullens, except Esme and Carlisle, who were lucky cuz they weren't home...