A/N: I know, it shouldn't have taken me near this long to get this chapter up! I'm sorry! I've been on night shift at work and am finding little time to get anything done when I'm not sleeping! Anywho… here's the next chapter!
And thanks so much to those very few of you that took the time to review that last chap!
Chapter Two
Reflections at Hand
Aang tried not by fooled by the normalcy of dinner that night.
With everything seeming so ordinary and all the parts playing out as they had every night since Zuko had joined their group, it was hard not to get caught up in the monotony of the same old same old.
Zuko ate apart from the group as he always did, staying within earshot but not close enough to put in any input on the subject at hand (whatever that may be… at the moment it was listening to Sokka complain about Katara's "lack of meat" in tonight's meal).
Haru, Teo, and the Duke chattered on and on about all the great twists and turns of their temporary home that was the Western Air Temple. Sokka pacified their eagerness with his constant reminders that they would have to leave soon if there was any hope of freeing their friends in time for another invasion. Toph ate in silence, taking in the conversations around her with her feet planted firmly on the ground as always.
And then, there was the current – and frequent – object of his attention…
Katara sat directly to his left, so close that he could smell the jasmine soap she used in her hair – a scent that he commonly associated with Katara, and consequently it always made his heart beat a little faster and his mouth a little drier. She attempted to make light small talk, though Aang couldn't help but notice how distant her smile seemed as the light refused to reach her eyes. His attempts to lighten the situation with stories of giant Koi fish and wind surfing were only met with halfhearted laughs and "uh-huhs".
The pale moon hung in the dusky sky, casting a pale glow across the silhouette of the Air Temple and sending a foreboding awareness through its inhabitants. Aang was startled from his thoughts of jasmine scented daydreams as Zuko took a step into the group's circle.
"I think we should be making a plan," the prince said suddenly, interrupting Teo's excitement about his plans to explore the echo chambers in the morning.
Aang noticed Katara stiffen beside him as the Fire Prince took a seat between Sokka and Toph. The young waterbender grumbled something that Aang couldn't quite decipher before addressing the group, "He's right."
Zuko looked up with an amazed frown – apparently, Aang wasn't the only one who was surprised by Katara's agreement with the Fire Prince. Zuko looked as if he'd say something, but then decided against it as he diverted his attention back to Aang, a confused expression replacing his surprise.
Aang cleared his throat, deciding that he should probably say something considering he was the Avatar (and according to Katara, the supposed leader of the group…). "The full moon is in three nights," he responded as all eyes went to him. "Our best chance is to plan the break out for that night, since Katara's and my waterbending will then be at its peak."
Sokka added nonchalantly, "I agree. We should leave that morning and invade that night. Dad and the others should be free by sunrise." The warrior shrugged his shoulders casually as if this were common knowledge.
Aang furrowed his brow, "It's not going to be that simple Sokka."
He could feel Katara's surprised eyes on him, realizing that it wasn't in his character to be pessimistic. However, he refused to underestimate his opponent or a situation again. Not after the Day of Black Sun… Not after failing the world again…
"There's guards stationed all around that place. If we have any hope of success, we have to be ready for anything…"
"Aang…" Katara's hand was warm on his arm, but he chose to ignore the fluttering feeling that it brought to his chest for the time being. The concern in her voice was apparent, "We spent all night making sure that we'll be ready. There's nothing to worry about. We've done far more dangerous missions."
Aang met her eyes with something between despair and apprehension, "We can't be too careful Katara. I don't want anyone to get hurt."
She smiled faintly in an attempt of reassurance, but it was laced with a sadness that he'd never seen there before. She knew he was doubting himself as he had countless times before in their journeys together – didn't he realize yet that nobody is perfect? She also knew that it was only a matter of time before she could bring him back… She could always bring him back…
Zuko and the others must have been getting uncomfortable in the silence that followed as an unspoken dialogue went on between the Avatar and his waterbending sifu, because the once-again-banished Prince spoke up with an uncomfortable squeak in his voice, "So we leave in three days then…" He addressed Aang as he stood up to return to his room, "In that case, I'll see you at sunrise. We have a lot of training to do between now and then… You've got to be ready. There'll be a lot of firebenders at the prison."
Aang nodded without eye contact as Zuko passed beside him. He looked up, however, when Zuko paused between him and Katara, as if unsure what he was going to say next…
The prince looked down at the waterbender uncertainly as she met his gaze with equal hesitance. "Thanks for dinner," he mumbled quickly, almost incoherently.
She opened her mouth to respond, but was unable to voice anything before he strode off towards the dormitories.
Katara sighed and dropped her gaze back down the soup bowl in her lap as if she were ashamed of herself for something – though Aang couldn't think for the life of him what she would ever be ashamed for…
The group finished their dinner in silence, everyone wondering silently about the awkward exchange between Katara and the Fire Prince that she so openly despised.
Aang tossed in his bedding again, flipping over on his stomach and releasing another sigh in agitation at his unrelenting inability to sleep. In an attempt to invite well-deserved rest, he closed his eyes. However, it was useless… Images of fiery glares and the faces of his sorrowful companions danced behind his closed eyelids. Expressions that screamed How could you do this to us? How could you let us down again? berated his sleepless mind, taunting him in circles of disappointment and shame.
So, Aang handled the situation as he had a thousand times before…
Wearily, he stumbled from his bed, untangling himself from his sheets – tossing and turning had turned his bedding into more of a cocoon than a covering – and tripped blindly through the darkness of his room until he reached the moonlit hall. With the pale glow of the sky illuminating the temple corridors, he wandered aimlessly through forgotten passages, his mind finding anything to focus on but his failure.
Aang found it intriguing that whenever he lost himself in the temple's quagmire of hallways and doors, his mind also lost itself in its own inner workings. He also found it intriguing – and rather quieting – that it almost always left him sifting through thoughts of a girl with long mahogany hair that was never out of place, bright blue eyes the color of the sea, and a smile that would stop the world from spinning.
Truth be told, he'd never met anyone quite as wonderful as Katara. He found it hard to believe that he'd spent the first 12 – technically 112, but who's counting? – years of his life away from such a beautiful creature, and he honestly couldn't imagine spending the next hundred years anywhere but in her presence…
Eventually, his aimlessness led him to a secluded balcony overlooking one of the dozens of empty courtyards throughout the temple. He took a seat on a far bench on the opposite side of the terrace, letting himself drink in the tranquility around him. It was peaceful, the way the moon painted the landscape in an eerie pale glow, the only sound reaching him being the chirping of the various fauna that lived around the temple. 'The only thing,' he thought fondly, 'that would make the moment perfect would be…'
"Aang?"
The young Avatar jumped, surprised from his thoughts at the sound of her voice piercing his mind. He smiled, and without turning around to face his new companion, patted the vacant spot on the bench beside him. "Hey Katara," he responded softly, his voice carrying on the slight breeze.
She understood his nonverbal cue, and within seconds the spot beside him was no longer vacant and the strong scent of jasmine was overtaking him. He breathed a deep breath in an attempt to clear his mind of the haze it was creating.
"Couldn't sleep?" she asked quietly, the concern for his health apparent in her voice.
"It's just a beautiful night and I couldn't pass it up," he answered, not wanting to worry her with his feelings of guilt – he could never let her worry over him. He finally looked over to her, surprised to see that she was only dressed in a dark blue nightgown that left more skin exposed that he was used to seeing on her. He blushed, returning his gaze to the moonlit courtyard below them. "How about you? Couldn't sleep?"
He noticed her shake her head out of the corner of his eye, causing her hair to dance about her shoulders as the wind carried its scent to him. He shuddered as she answered, "I heard you pass by my door. I was worried about you."
"How'd you know it was me?" he asked, suddenly feeling rather fed up with himself that despite his efforts, she was worrying about him anyway.
"I always know when it's you," she answered with a smile as she turned towards him, her eyes bright and sparkling – reminding him of the night sky, he thought contentedly.
He returned her gaze and her smile, hoping that the soft light wouldn't reveal the red tint he could feel his face taking on. Desperate for a change of subject that would hopefully calm the beating of his heart, he quickly responded, "Sorry you had to be on guard watch last night… I hope everything went okay."
Katara's smile slowly faded and her face went faintly grim as she recognized his statement for what it really was: a question of how things went between her and the Fire Prince. "It went okay," she answered, hoping that it would be enough to satisfy Aang's interest. It was no secret that she held as much trust for Aang's newfound firebending teacher as she held for his tyrannical father.
Aang couldn't help but notice how it seemed a rather touchy subject and one she didn't want to expound upon. This, however, didn't stop the curiosity that had first exposed itself early that morning when he had picked them up from their stakeout.
"Is everything… okay?" he asked cautiously, "… I mean, between you and Zuko."
Katara seemed to deflate at the mention of the firebender's name. "Everything's fine," she answered shortly.
He knew that was where the questioning should have stopped, but Aang couldn't help himself. An uneasy feeling had seeded itself in the pit of his stomach, and he just couldn't ignore it – what was that enraging feeling anyway? "Are you sure? Because you seemed really distracted at dinner…"
"I'm fine Aang," she answered quickly. "Can we just… talk about something else?" she added at length, her gaze falling in line with Aang's briefly before they both stared out over the railing in the front of them and not at each other.
"Sorry," Aang muttered as an awkward silence followed. Truthfully, he didn't really know what to talk about with Katara anymore. Before the invasion, he had felt like he could talk about anything in the world with her… Frequently she was the only one he felt comfortable divulging information with that he deemed "secretive". He could talk about his past with her, his feelings of guilt and shame, his uncertainty, his dreams, his nightmares, his thoughts (excluding those concerning her of course)…
But, ever since the failed invasion he felt like he was on a tight wire when they were alone together. What if he said the wrong thing? What if she took it the wrong way? What would she think of him if he told her these things? Since that day he'd kept most of his feelings and thoughts bottled inside of him – which was oddly uncommon to him. He was sure that it was putting a strain on their relationship, but that knowledge didn't stop his teenage mind from playing games with his heart… Since the Day of Black Sun, he just couldn't bring himself to fail her again…
Well, if he were really being honest with himself, he'd admit that it wasn't the failed invasion that caused most of the discomfort between them…
It'd been over a month since his impromptu kiss atop the navy vessel, and he still wasn't totally sure he hadn't dreamed the entire thing up. He'd been so anxious in the days leading up to the invasion, his nerves frazzled to frayed wires and his mind playing tricks on him in his sleep deprived state. Perhaps that moment when his lips collided into hers was merely another daydream? He had made a quick decision to avoid the subject at all costs…
She certainly hadn't made it apparent that it happened. Sure, he would sometimes catch her staring at him over the campfire or when he was practicing his Firebending forms. But she was always deep in thought, and maybe in those instances she didn't realize what earthly focus she held as her mind drifted a million miles into space.
But he always knew… He could feel her eyes on him in such instances, and it would always make him forget what he was doing.
"Aang, what are you thinking about?"
He'd been so deep in his thoughts, that he'd almost forgotten that the object of his musings was sitting directly beside him. Aang cleared his throat nervously, "Who me?" he squeaked. He knew it probably sounded stupid, but he was trying to buy his time until he could think of something more appropriate to say.
Katara quirked an amused smile, "Who else would I be talking to?"
"Oh," he felt the blush rising to his face again – how did she hold such power over him? – as he fiddled with his thumbs. "N-nothing really…"
Katara didn't seem convinced as she raised her eyebrows at him, "Well, you sure had a thoughtful look on your face to be thinking about nothing…"
Maybe it was her close proximity, or maybe it was the surreal-ness of the moonlight around them… Maybe it was just the fact that despite the awkwardness that had lapsed between them for the past month, he still felt comfortable with her… Whatever it was, Aang wasn't quite sure what made him suddenly ask the question that had been nagging him since they'd first stepped foot in the Western Air Temple over a month ago.
"Katara, what exactly do you remember about the Day of Black Sun?" he asked suddenly, his eyes hopeful as he focused them on her.
"Oh, um…" She seemed taken back by his question, judging by the slight widened in her eyes as a dawn of realization set into her features. "I… um…" the fact that she seemed to be struggling for an answer slightly discouraged the young Avatar.
"It all went by so fast…" she finally answered as her eyes took on a distant look, as if she were watching past events play out in front of them. "I remember that morning, when Dad and his men met us at the bay with all the troops. I was so proud of Sokka," she smiled at the mention of her brother's name. "He worked so hard planning that invasion, I guess I never realized how smart he really is."
She paused before continuing, "I remember the trip to the gates… Although the fighting kind of seems like a blur now," her face scrunched up a bit as if she were trying to delve deeper into her memory. "I remember when Dad got hurt, and I remember seeing you flying back from the palace…"
Aang couldn't help but notice how she'd left out the kiss before he'd ever even left to go to the palace…
Katara hesitated before meeting his gaze, "I remember a lot, Aang." She paused again, as if unsure whether of not to say what was coming next. "More than you might think…"
She looked hopeful, the way her eyes were sparkling into his, and he felt a sudden familiar pang of some emotion that he could only identify as pure affection. He felt himself smiling without meaning to as he met her gaze and a soft breeze blew threw her hair as she returned his smile. He noticed her shivering in the coolness of the temple air – although, he wondered exactly what she expected when she left such little on to guard herself from the weather – he silently cursed his own element for possibly cutting their time short.
"Are you cold? Do you want to go inside?" he asked reluctantly.
She shook her head eagerly. "I'm okay. It's just a little chilly out here," she answered as she scooted a little closer to him on the bench, seeking his warmth unintentionally.
He smiled, his heart rate skyrocketing at her close proximity. It seemed lately that no matter what seemingly insignificant gesture that came from Katara – a smile, a look, a laugh – they always had that same effect on him.
"What about you?" Katara asked quietly. "What do you remember from that day?"
He paused, pondering his situation and where it might lead before answering. "I remember everything," he answered solemnly.
It got very quiet on the terrace after that, even the breeze had stopped whipping around them. The night air was still and reverent as a dim glow began to break over the eastern horizon, signaling the rise of the sun and the dawning of a new day. Aang noted painfully that he'd spent another night with barely any sleep.
Katara stayed still and quiet for several moments, allowing him time to think. Finally, he broke the silence…
"There's not one detail about that day that I haven't looked back on, wondering if I did the right thing," the sadness in his voice was apparent.
Katara took it as guilt for not defeating the Fire Lord that day, and as always, was there in an instance to tell him that it wasn't his fault, "Aang, Azula was ready for us. There's no way you or anyone else could have foreseen that."
"But, I should have been stronger, Katara. I should have been more prepared, ready. And I should have never underestimated what Azula was capable of…" his voice was rising unintentionally, his brows creased at the painful memories. He paused to close his eyes and draw a deep breath, and continued with a much gentler tone, "But, it's not just that Katara," he finished softly. "It's… you."
Katara shifted her gaze to him, the surprise evident in her stature and voice, "Me?"
Aang hesitated, giving him enough time to glance over at her confused expression and take note of the hopefulness still vivid in her eyes. "Katara, when I left to fight the Fire Lord that day… I thought…" he paused to take a deep breath, "…I thought I'd never see you again."
Katara nodded understandingly, as if she too had had the same thoughts in months past.
"I was afraid I'd never get the chance to…" he trailed off unknowingly. "I just couldn't let you think that I never… I wanted you to…" he was rambling nonsense and in some still coherent part of his mind that wasn't clogged with sleep deprivation he knew it. "I didn't want it to end without you knowing…"
"Without me knowing what Aang?"
He stopped and drew a deep breath, his eyes searching out hers in a longing way that he knew he couldn't hide. She was so still, every muscle in her body seemed tensed and frozen as she awaited his reply… Her mouth twitched into a small expectant smile, her tired eyes fixated on him in a warm gaze.
"Katara…. I…"
"Hey! I've been looking everywhere for you! I thought I told you to meet me for training at sunrise."
Aang flinched at the annoyed and surprised quality of Zuko's voice coming from behind him as he suddenly became aware of how his heart had somehow stopped beating sometime in the last 10 or 15 seconds. He released a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding as he spun around to greet his firebending teacher.
"Sorry Sifu Hotma-" he hesitated with a nervous laugh at the irritated glare Zuko sent his way. "Uh, I mean Zuko."
"Let's go," Zuko replied simply before turning around and disappearing through the terrace doorway.
Aang watched him leave before turning back around towards Katara. She looked desperately annoyed and somewhat infuriated as her eyes left the spot Zuko had been standing in only seconds ago.
"I've uh…" Aang tried to smile genuinely but failed miserably as he stumbled around his words. "I've got to go… now…." He spun around, airbending himself from his seat and running off towards the door, "I'll see you later!"
"Wait!" she called after him just before he reached the archway leading back into the temple where Zuko had made his unexpected entrance. He paused in the doorway, his gaze meeting hers unsurely. "What was it you wanted to tell me?" she asked quietly.
"N-nothing important," he answered quickly before flashing her that boyish smile that suited him oh-so-well. "We'll talk about it later." And with that he took off in a blur of orange and yellow.
She ran up to the door he'd disappeared from, "Promise!" she called after his shirt tail as it vanished around the winding staircase.
"Promise!" came his echoed reply.
A/N: So? Likey or no likey? I just had to give Katara another reason to be pissed at Zuko, simply because I love writing bitchy Katara so much. Lol Other characters will play a more important role, and shall be making their appearances soon, but until then I'll be focusing on Katara mostly. Don't forget to review:)
