Here it is, part 2. Finally!
I will be honest. I rewrote and rewrote this chapter over and over, hence the late update, but it does not live up to part 1. However, the story will get better! Now sit back, relax and eat some pie!
Disclaimer: I love you, you love me, BARNEY GOT STUNG BY A KILLER BEE! HIS HEAD POPPED OFF AND HIS BUTT TURNED BLUE! NOW WE'RE FREE TO SAY I HATE YOU!
Tenten and Lee were standing there sobbing when an Oompalompa came along.
"What is wrong?" it asked, looking up at them.
Tenten glared at him (she had glaring lessons with Neji every Thursday from 6 to 7:30) "You, don't look at us like that, all cute and innocent. We see right through you. You're trying to get our trust so then you can lure us into some dark room and DEVOUR US!" She screamed at it.
The Oompalompa gave her a w-t-f look?
"Uh, ignore her, she's crazy…" Lee said, chuckling nervously.
"Don't call me crazy! You're the gay freak with big-ass eyebrows and freaky-ass bug eyes! I'm not crazy!" She screamed back.
"…I'm not crazy…" Lee said, sniffling.
Tenten just glared at him with a glare that would make Neji proud.
Lee just sniffled some more.
Glare.
Sniffle.
Glare.
Sniffle.
Glare.
Sob.
Glare.
Rolling around on the floor crying.
Tenten, obviously satisfied with her work, turned back to the Oompalompa, who started shaking.
"Why are you still here? Go away or else I'll eat you before you can eat me!" She growled.
"Yes, miss." He whimpered, then took off.
She then glared again at Lee, then started to back away when
"Wow, you really are crazy." Came a voice from behind her.
She turned around to see -TA DA- NEJI!
"Oh, you're another one who shouldn't be- Wait, YOU CAME OUT!" Tenten yelled, then ran over and hugged him, starting to cry.
"We never thought you would come out! We were so worried!" Tenten sobbed onto his chest.
"Ya!" Lee was also sobbing on him now.
Neji stood there for a second, then shrugged and crying himself. Then all 3 of them broke and down and started crying on the floor.
-4 hours later-
Neji, Tenten, and Lee sat around playing Pretty, Pretty Princess again.
Lee moved his piece 6 spaces. He landed on… Dun dunt da dun! Put all your pieces back!
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Lee screamed, throwing back his head and spinning around in circles. He looked quite stupid actually…
-2 hours 18 minutes 47 seconds and 19 milliseconds later-
Lee stopped. "Okay guys, we can finish the game no- THEY'RE GONE!" Lee then started crying again.
-With Neji and Tenten-
Now, these 2 had found the kitchen! WOOT! And now they were sitting on the counter eating cookies and other delectable sweets.
"Do you really think we should have left him there like that?" Tenten asked.
"Hn." Came Neji's famous reply though it sounded more like 'Hmnph' due to the fact that him mouth was full of 18 cookies. No, I didn't think that many would fit either, but I don't make up the stories, I just write them down. …Okay, ya, I make them up but honestly…who cares? Not me! But I bet Fred cares! Remember him? He's the strongest youth in Naruto! (See my Jeopardy chapter for further details)
"Okay, you don't have to put it like that…"
"Hm."
"You are so cruel to him."
All the Oompalompas were staring at the 2 having this …conversation.
"Un."
"You know, he's not too bad. Even you can't deny it."
"Um."
"See. There you go."
"Um… excuse me Prince Tenten?"
Tenten looked down at the oompalompa tugging on her sleeve.
"What do you want?"
"Do you actually understand him?"
"Ya…Don't you?"
The Oompalompa sadly shook its head.
"Oh, okay then."
Silence.
"Wait. I know what's going on. You're trying to make friendly talk to gain our trust, but then you're going to EAT US!" She screamed.
All the Oompalompas stared.
"Uh…yea…she's kinda…crazy today…" Neji said apologetically.
"I'M NOT CRAZY!" She screamed.
All the Oompalompas stared.
Tenten stared back then yelled, "Quick, Neji, let us go and plan a rebellion against the Oompalompa's rebellion!"
"What?" He asked, mouth full of cookies.
"Let us go, Neji!"
"…You've been spending too much time with Gai-sensei and Lee…" Neji muttered.
"…" Tenten then grabbed him by the back of his collar and dragging him away…
"NO! MY COOKIES! MY BABIES! MOMMY WILL RETURN! I WILL RETURN! I LOVE YOU!" Neji screamed as he was forcibly dragged from the kitchen.
"…What was that…" One Oompalompa said to the other.
He shrugged back.
-With Lee-
"Dang it! I'm lost again!" Lee screamed falling to his knees.
Lee looked around hopelessly at his surroundings.
He was in the middle of the big hall with the throne it.
Gai looked at him with pity.
-With Neji and Tenten-
"We must find a hiding place!" Tenten yelled, still dragging Neji, who was sobbing because he had to leave his precious cookies. After all, he was their "Mommy".
"Gasp!" Tenten yelled instead of gasping. She has been spending WAY too much time with Lee and Gai…
"It's perfect!" She screamed, pointing.
Neji looked.
It was a closet.
"Why is it perfect?"
"…"
"…"
"It just is."
"…Right."
They stood there in silence for a couple seconds.
Then Tenten threw Neji in to the closet, then followed, slamming the door shut behind them.
-With Lee and Gai-
Gai was still watching Lee sob pathetically on the floor.
Finally, he cracked.
"LEE! YOU ARE NOT LOST!"
Lee looked up at Gai.
"You are just trying to trick me! I am lost, damn it!" His eyes were red and he was foaming at the mouth.
The whole world was frightened. A rabid Lee is not a good Lee. He and his eyebrows were going to take over. It was inevitable. Everyone headed to their homes to enjoy one last evening with their families.
Except one very brave and stupid soul.
"Right, Lee. Stop."
Lee looked up.
"Are you sure I'm not lost?"
"Yes, Lee, I am sure."
There was silence between the man and boy.
(At least we think they're male. It hasn't yet been confirmed.)
"Lee!"
"Gai-sensei!"
"LEE!"
"GAI-SENSEI!"
"LEE!"
"GAI-SENSEI!"
"LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
"GAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-SSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!"
Hug, sparkles, the whole shabazz.
-With Tenten and Neji-
"Okay, time to take attendance."
"Tenten, it's only us two." Neji said, exasperated.
"Neji, Neji, Neji." Tenten said sadly, shaking her head. "You spent too much time under that table. We're not the only two in here." She continued, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. "There are tons of members in here."
Neji looked around and saw no one but the two of them.
"I don't see them."
Tenten blinked. "For a guy with all seeing eyes, you are incredibly blind."
"Thanks." He said dryly.
"You're welcome." She answered happily.
She then jumped up and sat on top of a bucket. "Right then. Neji?"
"Here." He answered unenthusiastically.
"Tenten?" She looked around for a second.
Then she jumped up, raised her hand in the air and yelled, "Here!"
Then she sat back down.
"Okay, we're done. Can we just get this over with?" Neji asked.
"No, we are not done! Broom?"
Neji groaned.
-With Gai and Lee-
Gai and Lee were playing pretty, pretty princess again.
Lee moved his piece 6 spaces. He landed on… Dun dunt da dun! Put all your pieces back!
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Lee screamed, throwing back his head and spinning around in circles. He looked quite stupid actually…
-2 hours 18 minutes 47 seconds and 19 milliseconds later-
Lee stopped. "K, we can finish now."
"What?" Gai jerked awake.
"We can finish the game." Lee said,
"Oh… right." Gai replied stupidly.
Grumble.
Gai and Lee looked at Gai's stomach.
Grumble.
"SHUT UP!" Gai screamed, jumping up, looking at his stomach.
Grumble.
"Do not defy Gai-sensei!" Lee yelled, also jumping up.
Grumble.
Lee and Gai grew 2nd heads, started breathing fire, and attacked Gai's stomach, killing him. Then Lee went on a rampage and killed your mom.
The End.
-With Neji and Tenten-
"Screw #4679?" Tenten asked, looking up from a piece paper 25 feet long, draped over our poor little Hyuuga sitting on a bucket.
"…"
"You there?" Tenten looked around until she was satisfied then marked her paper.
"K, we're done!" Tenten yelled happily, throwing the paper up in the air.
Neji paused for a couple of seconds, then pulled the paper away from his face.
He stared at her silently for a couple of seconds, then jumped up at screamed something primal and slightly frightening.
Tenten stood there, indifferent to her psycho teammate.
Finally he stopped and sat back down.
"Right, now then. We are here to discusses the Oompalompa rebellion." She said in a commanding voice.
Neji raised his hand.
"Yes, Neji?"
"The oompalompas are not having a rebellion."
"YES THEY ARE! WHAT FACT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY THAT THEY AREN'T?"
"And what fact do you have to say that they are having one?"
Tenten sat back down again calmly.
"My the-oompalompas-are-about-to-have-a-rebellion- sense is tingling."
"…You have one of those?" Neji asked, cocking an eyebrow.
Tenten nodded.
"…Right…"
All was silent for a few seconds.
Neji stood up.
"K, I'm hungry. Can we go eat and then have this meeting?"
Tenten pondered for several seconds.
Grumble.
Both looked at their stomachs, then at each other.
"Fine, but then we come back."
Neji rolled his eyes then replied with a "Hn," which for the sake of the story, we will pretend it means yes.
Neji turned to the door, then turned the knob and pushed.
It didn't open.
He pushed again.
Still closed.
He turned to Tenten, who watching.
"It won't open…"
Tenten sighed, then said, "Let me try." She then pushed on the door.
It didn't open.
The two looked at each other, then screamed and started pounding and pushing on the door.
"HELP! THE OOMPALOOMPAS ARE GOING TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF US IN THIS STATE AND COME AND EAT US!"
"DON'T LEAVE ME LOCKED IN HERE WITH HER, SHE'S GONE CRAZY!"
"HEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!"
-With Gai and Lee-
Gai came back to life, and Tsunade chopped of the extra heads, so it was like nothing ever happed. But your mom's still dead. BURN.
Now the two of them were wandering aimlessly through the halls, trying to find something to eat. You'd think they'd have the sense to just go to the kitchen, but the bowl cuts have eaten their brains. Tragic, ain't it?
But, then they heard incoherant screaming from somewhere. They looked at eachother, and then started heading towards the noise.
They found the source, a closet.
Out of the closet came a voice. And not just any voice, but Tenten's voice.
And thumping.
"Push harder damnit!"
Then came second voice, Neji's. "I'm trying! This is the first time this has happened to me!"
"I don't care, it's my first time too, but just keep pushing!"
The thumpings became louder and more frequent.
"You're not exactly pushing too hard and doing your part!"
"You're supposed to be the strong male, not me!"
"This is all your falt anyway!"
"What?"
"You're the one who locked us in here!"
"You suck, Hyuuga Neji, you suck!"
"And you swallow!"
"…"
"Oh yeah, I got you with that one, didn't I?"
"…I'm tired, let's take a break."
"Fine, but this was all your fault…"
Silence came from within.
Gai then turned to Lee and started singing, "Let me tell you about the birds and the bees and the flowers and the trees and the sky up above…"
The 2 then skipped away as Gai continued singing.
-In the closet-
Neji and Tenten sat down on some buckets, tired from their frantic attempts to knock down the door. Needless to say, it did not work.
"This. Is. Stupid." Neji said, over annunciating each syllable.
"…" Tenten had nothing to say for herself.
It seemed as though they were going to be trapped in here for all eternity when, "Hello Prince Tenten and Jester Neji!" Popped a little Oompalompa out of the second door in the closet.
Both jumped up in surprise, hugging eachother.
"How long has that door been there?"
"We just built it."
"How? We were right here the whole time." Tenten asked.
"You were yelling too loud to hear us." He answered happily.
"…"
"Anywho, dinner is now being served."
Tenten squinted as she glared. "Ya, for you. YOU'RE GOING TO EAT US!"
The Oompalompa just stared then asked, "Are you coming or not?"
"NO!" Tenten screeched.
"Just ignore her. I'm coming." Neji answered.
"NO! THEY'LL EAT YOU!" Tenten screamed.
Neji simply shrugged and followed the Oompalompa out.
Tenten dropped to her knees and started crying. My, this happens often.
"No, Neji! You're going to die! I wanted to be the one to kill you! If they also get Lee and Gai-sense, I'll have nothing to look forward to in later life!" She and Sasuke should meet up some time…
-With Gai and Lee-
"And then the lady screams at the man that she is going to kill him, and the doctors throw him out of the room and he wonders why because he is dim! Then she screams another time, and the baby comes and starts to cry!" Gai was still singing…
"Excuse me, Princess Gai and Maid Lee?"
Gai stopped singing and looked down at the Oompalompa.
"Vaht? Vaht is it you vant from me?" He asked.
"How long have you been German?" Lee asked.
"Since five seconds ago. Vhy?
"Just wondering…"
"Anyway dinner is being served." The confused Oompalompa answered. Ninja could be germen?
Well, not Gai. He can change his nationality, gender, and underwear at will, though his will says he should change his underwear once every five days.
"Funny, we were just looking for a place to eat." Gai said.
"I thought you were singing about the birds and the bees?" The Oompalompa said in a confused manner.
"Shh! No wasn't!" Gai whispered, running behind the Oompalompa and covering his mouth, looking around suspiciously.
-In the kitchen-
Neji sat at the counter when the door opened and in came Thing 1 and Thing 2. GO DR. SUESS!
No, it was really Gai and Lee. Sorry to disappoint you. Anywho they came in and sat next to him. Then they started singing "We all live in a yellow submarine, yellow submarine, yellow submarine…." After round 7, they were beginning to wonder when they were going to eat.
But when they turned to ask, the Oompalompas were all wearing bibs and carrying HUGE knives.
"Um… this is bad…" Lee whispered.
"The girl was on to us but none of you listened, so now you will be EATEN! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" One Oompalompa screamed, then all the others joined in the evil laughing.
The 3 idiots sat on the counter, suddenly wishing they had listened. They all looked at each other, the snuck out of the kitchen silently while the Oompalompas were distracted.
-Outside the Kitchen-
"We're screwed, we're screwed, we're screwed…" Lee kept muttering to himself as they snuck around the corner.
"SHUT UP!" Neji screamed, starting to freak out himself.
Suddenly, they heard voices around the corner, shouting, "We've found them, they're around this corner!"
"Neji…" Lee and Gai growled, turning slowly and glaring at Neji.
"Wait let us round the corner slowly and dramatically, giving the people around it enough time to come up with a plan to trick us because there is a dead end and there is no point in running!" They could hear all the others muttering in agreement.
"You're the person who gave us away, so come up with a plan to get us out of it!" Gai hissed at him.
"Okay, I'm thinking…" Neji hissed back. A light bulb appeared over his head. After a couple of seconds, it flashed on!
"Okay, this plan I call plan M…" Neji whispered franticly.
Lee and Gai just nodded and leaned in to listen…
-Around the corner-
"That's it, let's just go around the corner!" One Oompalompa screamed.
They all nodded then jumped around the corner to find… A mariachi band!
They were wearing red tuxedos with great big sombreros!
Lee was rockin the trumpet, Neji was jamming on the cello thing that I don't know what it's called, and Gai was playing those awesome bongo things.
"Well, there's no one here but a mariachi band."
"Let's try the other corner!"
All the Oompalompas ran away, screaming and shouting.
As soon as the coast was clear, the three pulled of their tuxes and started cheering, managing to get rid of the Oompalompas.
"Wait, I hear cheering!" Came a voice. Within seconds, all the Oompalompas were back.
"Fuck." Neji whispering.
There was silence all around. Then, the three screamed and ran away. The Oompalompas chased after them until the reached a dead end.
"Crap." Gai said, turning to face the Oompalompas.
They all laughed ominously as they rubbed their knives together, drooling and licking their lips.
"Well, guys, this is it." Gai said, gulping.
"Yea…" Lee whispered.
"You know, now that this is the end, I have something to tell you two." Neji said, wrapping his arms around them.
"Yes, Neji?" Lee asked, stars in his eyes.
"You guys are idiots." He answered, pausing for a couple seconds, the nodded as though agreeing with himself. "Yep, idiots..."
"Well, normally I would glare at you, but right now I honestly don't care." Gai sniffled.
The Oompalompas closed in closer, causing the three to be completely backed up into the wall. All hope was lost. It was over. It was…
THE END.
Whoot! Finished with part 2! Don't worry, it's not over! There is a part 3! Sing Hallelujah! Now, if you want to find out what happens, click that little purple button in the left corner. You know you want to…