The Legend of Zelda: The Legend of the Eternity Jewel

The Legend of Zelda: The Legend of the Eternity Jewel's Disclaimer: I did NOT make some of the charaters of the Legend of Zelda. I only made 2 and the fairy's name.

Wing Two.

"Come on, Linky. Cheer up," I suggested as we walked though the Forbidden Forest. Link has been quiet ever since we started our mission, which was a half hour ago. What can I say? I love to talk.

"Link, listen," I said hoping to get his attention. "If you don't exercise your vocal cords you'll become mute." Link just looked at me giving the signal to shut the fuck up, but I didn't. "You should get paid for rescuing her." I hate saying the name Zelda. It puts a bitter taste in my mouth, and an even worst after taste. It's like I just had lemons, garlic and onions all at the same time. And I hate all of those foods just as much I hate that woman.

All of a sudden, Link stopped and drew his bow and arrow and pointed it at me.

"Hey! I'll shut up!" I yelled. "I'll stay quiet for the remainder for the—"

"Move," he demanded.

I did what he said.

He pulled back the arrow with perfect form. The wind blew hard enough to blow his long, green hat off his head, and let his golden hair flow with its course.

Link finally shot the arrow at a berry bush and a dark figure, a boar on hind legs, I think, runs away. "I missed," Link finally said.

"You missed?!" I shouted. "That's all you're gonna say?! That you missed?! Here I thought you were gonna kill me!"

"Sorry," said Link as he put on his hat. "I'll warn you next time."

I let out a sigh. "Where are we going exactly?" I asked as we continued through the forest.

"Forbidden Fortress," answered Link.

"Are you serious?!"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Because we need to see Gannondorf."

"Why?"

"Because we might know something."

"Why?"

"Because… he might tell us something."

"Why?"

"Because he knows everything."

"Why?"

"Because he… I don't know. He's nosey?" His voice sounded irritated.

"Why?"

"Because, Ka'an. J-just because!"

"I don't understand why you'll go to your homosexual arch enemy for help. Didn't I mention homosexual?"

"He might tell us something, Ka'an."

"You seem tense, Linky."

"That's an understatement," said Link under his breath.

Crackle.

We shifted our heads to the sound. Who in the hell knows what's in the Forbidden Forest anyway. I mean, that's why they call it forbidden, right?

Finally, after much anticipation, a glowing figure tackles me. Triforce knows what it was because it left as soon as it came. This thing didn't even pass a sorry to me, and frankly, it pissed me off. So, I followed it, leaving Link behind. We were to fast for him.

We arrived by a beautiful lake with electric green fireflies flying above it. This glowing thing dived into the lake, and I stopped by the bank. I didn't want to get my wings wet. It's a pain to get back dry. Then, all of a sudden, that glowing thing illuminated the lake, giving it a beautiful bright, orange color. It glowed like the sun and the green fireflies made it more beautiful.

"My name is Tonaltzintli, the sun," said the glowing lake. "I'll give you what you desire." It sounded like a little boy.

Tontphufffft, Tonathhhhsss? I thought. "Say that name again."

"Tonaltzintli," repeated the lake.

"A little slower."

"Ton-alt-zint-li. It means the sun."

"Okay, Tonkaltmilli," I said incorrectly. "What do you mean you'll give me what I desire?"

"Just that."

"You make… wishes?"

"Yes."

"Can I wish death on someone?" I said viciously.

"No, I am the sun," it explained. "I give life and future. I cannot give death to someone."

"Lucky her," I said so low that only I could her.

"If you help me find my sister, Meztli, the moon, we'll give you your most secretive wish."

"You know my wish."

"Your deepest."

"Ch'yeah right and I'm the mother of all fairies," I said sarcastically.

"You want to become Elvin," started the lake, "but you still want your wings, am I right?"

I get in to serious shock to how he got it right.

"And to make Link to love you?"

"You're dead right."

"You think Zelda is not to be trust?"

"I know."

"I'll give you this at no cost of a wish, only if you reunite me with my sister."

"I promise." I said rising my right hand.

"Very well. Place your hand onto the surface of this lake. Then, all revealed."

I nodded and placed my hands on the lake.

A picture of the Hyrule Castle appeared. It then shifted to Zelda's room. She opened her eyes and said, "Father, is Link gone?"

"Yes, dear," answered the king as he stroked her hair.

Zelda gets out of her gigantic bed and walks to the window. "So, is he looking for the Jewel?"

"Yes," he answered.

A rush of hate went through my veins. How dare they use Link like this? I thought angrily. I knew something wasn't right. That bitch!

"As soon as he returns with the Eternity Jewel," he continued, "We'll kill him. Erasing the last of my mistakes."

Erase last of his mistakes? I thought. What does he mean erase? What did Link do?

"What about the idiot fairy?" asked Zelda.

Idiot?! I'm smarter than your dumbass.

"We'll kill her also," answer King Hyrule.

"Let me do that, Father," she said while they both shared the same devious laugh. "BAWHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

I splashed the water in the sense of getting rid of the picture, but it still played in my head. "Why?" I said with my teeth locked together. "Why would they do this to Link? He's a good person."

The lake lost its glow and a drenching wet boy, about ten years old, with light orange skin walked over to me and gently picked me up. He kind of reminded me of an oompa loompa.

"I'm Tonaltzintli in my Elvin form, he explained. "Is there another with you?"

I nodded as I shook the water off of my face.

"I am sorry if I had upset you in any kind of way," apologized Tonakatli.

"No, I needed to see that," I smiled. "Now, I know the real reason I hate her so much. She a snake and can't be trusted."

Link dived out of the bushes, "Ka'an!" and into the lake.

"Link?" asked Tonblahhhh.

"Yup," I answered. "That's the idiot."

Link walked up to us soaking wet and looked at the boy and then at me. "There you are, Ka'an," he said with relief. "I was worried."

"Ka'an…" Tonawhatever repeated slowly. "Your name is Ka'an?"

"Yeah," I said. "Sorry that I didn't give you an intro."

"Oh, it's fine," he smiled. "I just think it's a pretty name."

The boy was so formal and I had a strong sense that he could be trusted. Along with Link, he was among the many few that I trusted outside of Fairyville.

Link knelt down to Tonayomama. "Now, who are you?

"I am Tonaltzintli, the sun," he said.

"Tonaltzintli?" Link said so easily. "We need to make that shorter, huh, Ton Ton?"

"I like it," said the former Ton-alt-zint-li. There! I got it!

Link was good at making names shorter. I mean, Link's real name is Linkosidahsinety Kinequewnljo Marchlivonity the eighteenth, and he reduced that to four letters.

I explained to Link how we should help Ton Ton find his sister and nothing about the wishes. Either way, he agreed to help.

Ton Ton is now added to your party.

Finally, we reached the end of the Forbidden Forest. "It's crazy how close Gannondorf's place is so close to Hyrule," I noted.

No one made a comment like I was hoping. Instead, Link had his eyes fixed at the top where the homosexual bastard usually is and Ton Ton shivered like a rat-eared dog.

I sneezed a big sneeze that made the trees blow… literally. I made Link and Ton Ton jump.

"Dammit, Ka'an!" yelled Link. "I was getting in the Zone!"

"Sorry," I said. "I can't control that."

When Link is in "the Zone", you don't really want to deal with him. I don't know if he speaks Elvin anymore. When he's fighting, he sounds off with a "HIP! HA! HODDY YEAH!" and the occasional "HYAAAAAAAA!" and "HAAAAAAAAAT!"

"Ready?" I asked. "I know I am."

"HAAAAT!" sounded off Link, as he lifted his sword.

I looked at Ton Ton. He looked like he was about to piss in his pants. I flew over to his ear. "It'll be fine. Link is here to keep us safe," I said smiling. "and if he fails, I'll protect you with my kicks and sneezes."

He laughed.

"Hey, my kicks are powerful!"

He nodded and took in a deep breath. "I'm ready," he sounded sure of himself.

Link lifted up his sword once more and did one of his battle cries.

"If you learn for him, I wouldn't know what to do with myself," I said to Ton Ton.

He smiled like Chelsea (Chelsea's Smile) and we went onward to the Queer's Fortress.