The Legend of Zelda: The Legend of the Eternity Jewel

The Legend of Zelda: The Legend of the Eternity Jewel's Disclaimer: I did NOT make some of the charaters of the Legend of Zelda. I only made 2 and the fairy's name.

Wing Five.

I swear it's been days since I've been taken away. I was starting to turn senile. "Hey, you son of a bitch, let me down! I'm fuckin' bleeding from your damn claws. It hurts!"

"Close your trap," ordered the red dragon. "You've been yammering since last night. The second that I took yans."

He was speaking in an ancient tongue, but I understood him. I mean who uses yammer any more? It's so old.

"Say, where are we going?"

"None of your business."

I twitch. "What do you mean it's none of my business?! I'm the one that's getting kidnapped, dumbass!"

I tried to get free from the clutches of the dragon, but his claws were so deep in my shoulder that I started to bleed. Like a sensible person, I stopped.

"Link! I'm gonna kick your ass if you don't come."

We arrived at this island with a cloud of smoke circling the mouth of its volcano, I just guessing it's active, like the ones that me and Link go in. Anyway, we went in, the dragon and me, no Link. This one was hot and the smell of brimstone clogged my lungs. It reminded me of the time that I was gagging on my own dust. (READ WING ONE IF YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT) At any rate, as we went down a hot piece of the volcanic walls hit me, causing me to go unconscious.

Finally, I woke up. I woke up in a damn cage! And you should know me by know. I tried to bend the bars, which didn't work. So, I rested for a while and tried again.

"Stop trying to get out, dumbass," said a familiar voice.

I turned around to the direction that it came and there it was… ZELDA!

"You've grow, Ka'an."

"Don't let my name roll off your tongue so easily," I snapped. "If it rolls out to far, I might have to cut it off, Princess."

"Is that so?" Zelda said slowly as she walked towards me.

"Get me out now!"

"You're in no position to yell, KA'AN!"

The bitch was right. I was hovering over hot molten steaming magma. She could kill me. I looked around to see if Link would just so happen to appear with the slashing of the sword and whatnot, but the ass didn't come. No exciting entrance. No slashing of the sword.

"Ha… ha! Looking for someone?" The tone of her voice made me want to kill her even more. "Too bad. It will take me a while–"

Out of nowhere, a boomerang came. I think it was for Link. Anyway, it knocked Zelda down and I couldn't help but laugh. The boomerang returned to its owner and to my surprise it wasn't Link. It was the kids.

"What the bitch! What are you doing here?! Where's Link!"

"Linky fell down the hole," said Ton Ton.

"So we came to rescue you," said Me Me.

Honestly, I don't know how it happened but somehow the kids were in the cage when I blinked. Damn kids.

"Sorry, Ka'an," apologized Ton Ton. "We tried our best."

"It's cool."

It's cool my ass! It's freakin' hot! I think I lost ten pounds!

Zelda got up. "Hn. The star, Ka'an. The moon, Meztli. The sun, Tonaltzintli. Good."

"You knew all this you fucker! How dare you use Link! You don't know how happy I was when we dot the news that you were dieing. I was actually dancing."

"What?!"

"Sorry chick, but I hate your damn guts. I've never trusted you and what I seen you do was the lowest," I wanted to squeeze my body through the little spaces between the bars. "You make him go on some wild goose chase and…" I was so mad that tears streamed down my cheeks. "How dare you put my kids through this?! You're sick! Get us out of here now and stop being a coward dammit!"

Zelda had put her hands on her face as if she was crying but instead, she was laughing. "My fool of a father married a street tramp and shamed the Hyrule name. So, I killed him this morning. You see. The smell of blood made me a little too happy and I accidentally stabbed him thirteen times." Her eyes had changed. They were sharp and dark. They were eyes of a murderer.

"You're fuckin' crazy. You can't accidentally stab him thirteen times."

Zelda had burst into laughter. "I know," Zelda walked to the cage. "Now listen, you Jewel. You have a birthmark shaped like a star on your neck, the girl has a crescent moon, and the boy has a sun. Once you all die, you'll—"

"You're pissing me off. Shut the hell up."

"It your destiny to die!"

"Fuck destiny! I don't care what happens to me! Just let the kids out."

"No can do. You all have to die on the same second to make the jewel. So die."

The cage lowered slowly down to the magma filled cavern. I tried to kick open the top but it wouldn't budge.

"Are we going to die?" asked Ton Ton with concern.

"Is Link gonna come soon?" added Me Me.

"I'm not planning on dieing any time soon!" I yelled as my wings flapped. "We're getting out of here. Hold on to the bars."

They did as I said and I swayed the cage back and forth. This was progress. Finally, we had hit the volcanic wall and the bottom of the cage fell off. It picked up the kids and flew to the ledge that Zelda was on.

"Not bad," she said with lazy eyes. "So, you are the brains."

I send her a flaming glare.

"You're hard to kill. LINK!!"

What Link was here all this time?! When he came out he was wearing read and had brown hair.

"You like the new Link? I made him."

"What?"

"The original doesn't like me like he does."

"Well, there is the case that… HE'S YOUR BROTHER!!"

"Ka'an!" Everyone shifted their heads to the voice of Link, the green one. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, besides the fact that we almost died!"

It's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas! Ha ha! Zelda sang while she danced to the duplicate Link. "Hi Link number one, meet Link number two. Link number two meet Link number one. Link number one shall die by Link number two. Link number two have fun with Link number one."

"With pleasure."

Anticipation started to build as the battle of the Links drew closer.