I'm BACK!! Really long chapter because I was gone fore so long! Hope I still have some readers!
S4E15: All We Are
(Song title by Matt Nathanson)
MVO:From the moment we are born, we are comforted by specific things
Alex rolls over to see Rebbecca standing and rocking Emmie back and forth. He stands to kiss her, "Good Morning," Alex whispered in Rebbecca's ear.
by our standing mothers slight sway. The smell of her skin.
Callie woke up in George's arms, he kissed her fore head, "I missed you," he said softly. She smiled brightly.
As we grow, our comforts change to more materialistic things, chicken soup, a blanket, our teddy bear.
Meredith's kitchen was yet again full of people. Addison was feeding Emmie cheerios. Meredith was pathetically sitting at the counter eating Museli, Derek's favorite cereal. Izzie, was cooking eggs, Alex was kissing Rebbecca. Which was surprisingly not weird for Addison or Izzie, it was actually quite refreshing. He seemed to really like her. They would have an amazing story if they ended up together. Moments later Christina walked through the kitchen door.
Even as adults we are comforted by certain people, places and things.
"God, what is this like the breakfast club?"
"Hey," Meredith said.
Christina gave the cereal box a dirty look, "Who let Meredith eat this?"
"I tried to take it away from her," Addison looked up from Emmie.
Christina looked at Addison and then to the baby, "Mer, there's a baby in your kitchen?"
"I know, its Eva's-- Rebbecca's," Meredith caught herself.
"Do you live here?" Christina asked rudely. Rebbecca was too busy kissing Alex, "Okay?" Christina looked to Meredith, Meredith shrugged.
We learn to comfort others, sometimes before ourselves.
Mark was sitting in Derek's thinking chair. He looked lost. He had been avoiding Erica sense Addison was back in town. He wasn't even sure why he was avoiding her. He knew that Addison was going to leave, and then he would be alone. Alone was something he had never been good at. He had worked so hard to build a healthy responsible relationship. Sometimes it was what he wanted, and sometimes it felt as if he was building the relationship for Addison, because it was something he should have done with her a long time ago.
But is who we are defined by who we are when we are comfortable or is it judged by how we react in times of strife.
"That's my chair," Derek said breaking Mark's deep thought.
Martin Luther King Jr once said, "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." Perhaps the challenges he rose to were a little more… well challenging.
"I'm sorry," Mark's first reaction was to stand up, and then he looked around, and gave Derek a confused face, "There are six other chairs here."
"Yes, so could you pick another," Derek said firmly. Mark smiled. "Seriously Mark, get out of the chair."
Mark stood up quickly, "What's your problem?"
Derek sat in the chair and put his head in his hands, Mark sat in the chair next to him, "Meredith's pregnant," he sighed.
"Oh," Mark tried to sound as depressed as Derek, and then he couldn't hold back, "Derek, this is great, you'll be a great father!"
"It's not mine," Derek confessed.
"Oh," Mark sounded depressed again, "are you sure?"
"That's what she said," Derek explained.
"I didn't even know she was dating anyone," Mark commented.
"It was probably a one night stand," Derek said bitterly. "She has those often enough,"
"Ouch," Mark felt Meredith's pain. They sat silently contemplating the faults of their lives before Mark spoke again. "Your upset that it's not yours," Mark pointed out what he thought was obvious.
"No, I'm upset because she can barely take care of herself. How can she take care of a baby." Derek said.
"I don't believe you. I think you know that this is going to force her to grow up and you're sad that you can't be a part of that," Mark hit the nail on the head. "You're the one that's scared this time." Mark patted Derek's shoulder and stood up and walked away.
Addison, Meredith, Alex, Izzie and Christina all walked in the hospital. "Hey can someone babysit Emmie tonight?" Alex asked as they all waited for the elevator.
Addison gave Meredith a face, and then nodded toward Alex, "I'll do it," Meredith said hesitantly. Christina and Izzie gave Meredith a face, "What?" Meredith questioned. "I can babysit," Meredith insisted.
"Okay." Christina said sarcastically wide eyed.
"I'll help you Mer," Izzie said sweetly.
"Okay," Meredith smiled.
"I won't," Christina laughed.
"Are you sure it's okay?" Alex asked.
"Yeah, it's fine, we're good," Meredith nodded. Addison flashed an approving smile in Meredith's direction. Alex and Christina turned and walked up the stairs. Izzie, Meredith and Addison got on the elevator, they went up a floor and the door opened for Mark.
"Foursome anyone?" Mark grinned.
"Yeah right," Meredith laughed.
"Why not, I think the pregnancy thing is hot," Mark said without thinking.
Meredith almost fell over, "Mark!" Addison said immediately.
"Pregnancy thing? What Pregnancy thing?" Izzie asked curiously.
"Addison's pregnant," Meredith quickly lied pointing to her.
"What?" Addison shrieked. "Why would you tell her that, who would I possibly be sleeping with?"
Mark realized that he probably shouldn't have said anything but it was too late now.
"Who would I possibly be sleeping with?" Meredith returned the question.
"Which was actually what I was wondering?" Mark asked Meredith, making it quite obvious that she was the one that was pregnant.
"Oh, God," Meredith said turning away from them.
"Meredith, you're pregnant?" Izzie yelled. "Is it Derek's?"
"Izzie," Meredith turned to her with a pained look. "No it's not Derek's, Don't tell anyone any of this okay? Especially not Christina."
"Woah," Izzie said in surprise, "I know something before Christina?"
"Yes, please don't-," Izzie cut her off.
"Never in the 2 years that I have lived with you, have I known something before Christina," Izzie cheered, "Your secret's safe with me."
"But," Addison looked to Mark.
"Mark," Meredith said firmly.
"Under one condition," He said with a smile.
"We're not going to sleep with you," Meredith said immediately.
"If Addison will go to Joe's with me tonight," Mark suggested, "I'll keep your secret."
"Done," Meredith said, as the elevator doors opened.
"Meredith," Addison cried as Meredith and Izzie got off the elevator. "Ass," Addison mumbled at him.
"Come on, it'll be fun," he smiled. "You can brag to me about the weather in LA, and I can tell you how miserable I am in the rain."
"You had a really good thing going with Erica," Addison shook her head. "And you are going to blow it."
"Addison, we're friends, that's it, Erica's not going to mind." Mark said just as the elevator, opened to Erica standing there.
"Can I ask what, or was I not suppose to hear that?" Erica asked confidently.
"If I go get drink with Addison tonight?" Mark said.
"Are you going to sleep with her," Erica asked forwardly.
"No!" Addison answered.
"Then no, I am fine with you going to Joe's with Addison," The elevator doors opened and they all got off.
"Two incoming ambulances, with head traumas and a third is an attempted suicide, he jumped off a building." Bailey explained to Meredith, Izzie and Alex.
"I'll take Suicide guy," Alex called.
"Why?" Meredith asked giving him a confused face.
"I figure, he wanted to die anyway, so if I kill him, it won't be too hard to handle." Alex smiled sinisterly.
"God, you are morbid," Izzie said in disgust.
"Speaking of, I'm pretty sure he hates me today," Meredith said as the ambulances started to pull in.
"Alex?" Izzie asked.
"No, God," Meredith clarified.
"Okay?" Izzie said. "I have so many questions right now."
"Not now Iz," Meredith quieted her.
Bailey signaled Meredith over, "Amanda White," the paramedic stared rolling in the young women, "Twenty two, she was in a car accident, her head went through the passenger window. 28 weeks pregnant."
"For real?" Meredith mumbled to herself taking Amanda's chart.
"Elena Parker, Twenty Seven, hit her head on the steering wheel, was unconscious when we found her. She is 5 1/2 Months pregnant," The Paramedic rolled her in.
"Or maybe god hates Derek," Izzie laughed, taking Elena's chart.
"Someone page Dr Shepard, these head traumasare pretty extensiveve," Bailey said ordering a Nurse to do it. "Meredith, take her to trauma room two," Bailey ordered, "Izzie, room three."
"Bailey," Izzie, said.
"What?" Bailey asked.
"Have them page Dr Montgomery too."
Bailey gave her a weird look, "Addison's back?"
"Where have you been?" Meredith asked pushing the gurney into the trauma room.
Addison and Derek both went for the elevator at the same time. They almost touched hands reaching to press it. Addison pulled back, "Go ahead," she said. Derek gave her a dirty look, "What is that for."
"Meredith tells you she's pregnant and you don't tell me," Derek asked slightly angry.
"I'm not talking to you about this. I don't want to tell you anything I'm not suppose to," Addison raised her hands.
"What does that mean?" Derek asked in confusion.
"We are not married anymore Derek, I don't have to tell you anything. Meredith trusted me and I am going to be a good friend."
"Friend? You do realize I had sex with her while we were married?"
"Yah and I had sex with Mark and he is your best friend again. In fact you told him about Meredith," Addison pursed her lips.
"Go back to LA," Derek said as the elevator doors opened.
"Don't be so stupid," Addison said bitterly.
"Addison, Derek," Bailey called anxiously. "Two cases, both pregnant, both head trauma's, hope you two aren't fighting because its going to be a long day."
"Great," Derek groaned walking toward Trauma room 3.
"Welcome back," Bailey said sarcastically.
"You just can't win today," Addison laughed following him. "All that we need now is-"
Derek walked into the room. "Meredith," Derek said knowing his day officially couldn't get any worse.
"Can we just work, Derek, please," Meredith said.
"Fine," he said not looking at her.
"This is going to be fun," Addison said.
"Amanda White, Twenty two, car accident victim, her head went through the passenger seat window. 28 weeks pregnant."
"Miss White, can you hear me?" Derek asked. She didn't respond.
Addison pulled the sonogram machine into the room, while Derek did a series of Neuro tests.
"Dr. Grey, can you do the sonogram, I am going to do an exam and make sure there is no bleeding."
"Yeah sure," Meredith said half professionally, half pissed off, flashing Derek an annoyed look.
"Uh," Amanda groaned awake. "Is my baby," she stuttered, " is my baby okay?"
"We are doing some tests right now Miss White," Addison said. "Is there anyone you would like us to contact, a husband, boyfriend?"
"Well you could call my x-boyfriend but he'd probably be a little surprised to hear he is going to be a daddy." Amanda said, Addison looked to Meredith trying desperately not to laugh.
"Okay," she smiled.
"How is your sight?" Derek asked seriously.
"Pretty good," Amanda said.
"Any head ache," Derek asked.
"Not so much, a little dizziness," Amanda explained.
"Can you wiggle your toes for me?" Derek asked and watched as she did. "Okay," he touched her shoulder lightly, "right now it looks like the most important thing is your baby, so I am going to let Dr Montgomery and Dr Grey, do their job and I'll be back to check on you within the hour." Derek flashed his McDreamy smile and then left.
"Ouch," Amanda suddenly called out, holding her stomach.
"Okay, Miss White from what I can see here the baby is in distress. Addison, take a look at this," Meredith pushed the sonogram machine in her direction. Addison flipped through the pictures and pursed her lips.
"We are going to start a drip, to try and stop your pre-term labor." Addison said rushing to start the drip. Amanda suddenly put her hand to her head and groaned softly.
"Does your head hurt Miss White," Meredith asked.
"I'm… I'm," Amanda's eyes rolled back slightly and flickered closed.
"Page, Derek Shepard," Meredith called out to the nurse. Within moments Derek was back in the room.
"What's going on," he quickly went to Amanda's side.
"She lost consciousness about 3 minutes ago and is in pre-term labor," Meredith explained.
"Okay lets get her down for a CT and MRI and go from there," Derek said to Addison and Meredith.
Izzie was standing in front of trauma room three, waiting for Derek to come back. She still couldn't believe that Meredith was pregnant. More than that, she couldn't believe it wasn't Derek's baby. Despite everything they had gone through and even the fact that he had a new girlfriend, he had to be crushed. Izzie wondered if she was the only one who thought that.
"Guess what," Ryan whispered in Izzie's ear, sending chills down her spine. "my resident is out again today. You are stuck with me." He smiled as she turned around.
"Listen, I don't know what yesterday… that was… but its never happening again," Izzie said firmly.
"I don't believe you," he said with a grin. "You can't resist me."
"Please," Izzie tossed him a chart and then walked away.
"See you had to walk away…" Izzie turned back and gave him a dirty look and walked toward him again. " I knew you weren't the one night stand kind of girl." He said loudly. She pulled him into the staircase.
"Stop. Stop. Stop," she practically yelled. "Our relationship is strickly professional. I don't know what happened the other day, but its not going to happen again, ever! So you can stop the flirty little act and get your ass back to work. I am your boss and you will do what I say, when I say it. Do you understand me?" he didn't look at her, "Look at me," she practically yelled. He looked up, "Do you understand me."
"Yes," he said a little overwhelmed by her authority. He watched her walk away and couldn't help but smile.
"So, I was thinking that in we could go out to dinner tonight," George smiled spoon feeding Callie chocolate pudding.
"Um," she swallowed, "I think that's a great idea." She kissed him.
"Good," he smiled.
"I think we should buy a house," Callie said.
"Or what if we took Christina's apartment?" George suggested, "And then Christina could move in with Meredith."
"huh…" Callie thought for a second, "That's actually a good idea."
"Way to sound surprised." George laughed, Callie laughed too and then her pager went off.
"Gotta go," she smiled, kissed him and then walked away.
"Hey," Izzie cheerfully tapped George's shoulder. "Best friend."
"Hey you seen Meredith?" George asked with a concerned tone.
"Oh my god, you know about the baby too?"
"What baby," George asked in confusion.
"Damn," Izzie groaned.
George suddenly put the pieces together, "Oh my god, is Meredith pregnant?"
"Nooo…" Izzie lied obviously. "Okay, okay listen, no one, no one knows this. And we are only talking about it because we are best friends again," she practically sung it.
"Is it Derek's?" George asked curiously.
"No!" Izzie shrieked in confusion. "What the hell is that right?"
"More like, who the hell does it belong to?" George laughed.
"I missed you," Izzie laughed. "Ready for lunch Best friend?" she smiled brightly opening the lunch room door. They joined Alex at the table in the far corner.
"Are you sleeping together again," Alex asked between bits.
"Shut up, Alex," Izzie said bitterly. George walked to pick up a napkin.
"Where's Chrisitna?" Alex asked with a mouth full.
"I don't know," Izzie shrugged opening up her home packed lunch. George sat back down.
"How about Meredith?" Alex wondered if she was coming to lunch.
"You know too?" Izzie shrieked.
"Know--" Alex began, George cut him off.
"Why was I the last to know that Meredith is pregnant?" George burst.
"What? Shepard finally knocked her up?" Alex laughed.
"George!" Izzie shrieked again, "He didn't know."
"Know what?" Christina asked sitting down.
"Meredith is-" Alex looked to Izzie who was shaking her head hysterically. "Why are you shaking your head at me?" Alex asked her. "Ohh- Christina doesn't know that Meredith is knocked up?"
"No way," Christina laughed. The entire table was silent.
Meredith leaned against the wall, watching Derek and Addison fight.
"Look, I have to do brain surgery, I think that the mother should be before the baby."
"Not if the mother wants to save her babies life." Addison said.
"Amanda is not going to make it through that surgery." Derek yelled.
"Her baby will not make it through brain surgery," Addison yelled back.
"Hey!" Meredith yelled. "Let's do it at the same time. It's hard on both of them either way."
"Fine," Derek gave in, walking to scrub in.
"I can't handle him anymore," Addison put her hand to her head.
"Dr Stevens," Ryan nodded as they passed each other in the stair case
"Dr Pierce," she returned the same nod.
"Oh," he turned back, " I forgot, these are the labs for your patients." He handed them to her with a friendly professional smile. It sent butterflies to Izzie's stomach.
"Thanks," she said softly, not able to look away from him. She dropped the chart, it fell down the first flight of stairs. She leaned in and kissed him. After quite a long kiss, Izzie pulled away, covered her lips, as if covering them would erase what she had just done and then sprinted down the stairs.
The restaurant was dimly lit and there was a candle at every table. George was wearing a fancy dress shirt and Callie was wearing a dark red dress.
"Meredith is pregnant," George told Callie over their romantic dinner, "Did you know that?'
"What? NO?" Callie said in shock.
"Anyway, that wasn't the point. I was thinking, that maybe we could start trying again." He smiled nervously.
"Yeah," Callie smiled brightly. "I would like that."
"I talked to Christina today about the apartment idea," George started, "and she seems to be kinda mad at Meredith. Not sure why but we might have to find a new apartment, or house."
"I'm sure we'll find somewhere," Callie nodded touching his hand. Callie's look suddenly changed from comforting to almost devilish, "George," she squirmed slightly in her seat.
"What if we ditch dinner and get room service. Start trying right now?" She smiled
"Waiter," he put his hand up.
Derek and Meredith were standing in the scrub room, a little bit after Miss White's surgery.
"Damn it Meredith, you can't do things like that."
"Me?" she yelled. " Me?" She changed her tone and yelled again. " I didn't do anything. I was doing my job, the patient and her baby are fine because of me and Addison." she started to walk away and turn back. "Just because you are mad at me for some ridiculous reason, doesn't mean you get to blame your mistakes in surgery on me. So lets just do this now. What is this really about Derek?" Meredith yelled.
"It's about you sleeping around again and getting pregnant. I knew it would catch up with you someday and I just want to know when you are going to grow up and stop acting like you are 17," he said bitterly.
"This," she touched her stomach, "is my problem, not yours so why don't you do your job and mind your own business. You are not a part of my life anymore, and I will deal with things on my own."
"You can't do this by yourself Meredith," he said like she was insane to think she could.
"You don't get to tell me that. You have a new life and I don't blame you for it. I wasn't ready. But now that you moved on you don't get to tell me what I can't do," Her voice cracked with emotion, "For once in my life, Derek, I think I can do this. I could have gone the easy way and not had this baby, but I am. I am having this baby and its going to be the hardest thing I've ever done but I am going to do it anyway. And I know its ridiculous for me to want this baby but… I do," she cracked a teary smile, "and I am not going to let anybody take that away from me." A tear rolled down her cheek.
"Meredith," he said softly.
"Just don't." sighed and started to walk away, "Just don't"
Addison sat at Joe's, next to the man that had crushed her heart on more than one occasion. "What am I doing here?" Addison asked looking at Mark.
"You are convincing Meredith to keep her baby," Mark twirled the scotch in his glass.
"Yes, yes I am," she sighed, "but what am I doing with you?"
"Getting drunk," he laughed. She looked at him with a serious expression. "Addison," he said softly. "I miss you." Addison felt as if the glow in Mark's eyes burned through her skin. It sent tingles to her stomach, a feeling she had hoped to avoid on her trip back to Seattle. With his soft words, there eyes seemed to drift closer. Suddenly they were trapped and couldn't break eye contact. "Let's go," Mark mumbled not looking away from her. Everything inside of her was telling her to walk away from him, and go back to Meredith's house but the look in his eyes, was begging her to stay. Moments later, she took his hand and they got up to leave.
"We'll be fine," Meredith said nervously, "really we will."
"Oh kay, well you have my cell and Alex's, if you need us." Rebbecca said walking out the door. As the door shut, Emmie started to cry. "Oh, oh," Meredith ran over to her. She picked her up, "It's okay," she bounced her on one hip. She still cried, "What about some ice cream, do you want some ice cream?" Meredith asked playfully bouncing her. "Yah? You want some," Meredith said in a baby voice. Emmie was quiet. Meredith walked them to the kitchen and put Emmie in her high chair. She pulled the ice cream out of the refrigerator and turned to find Christina in the doorway. She dropped the gallon, startled.
"When were you going to tell me?" Christina asked.
"Tell you what?"
"Right," Christina said under her breath and turned to walk the other way. "We were barely friends and I told you about my abortion and now I'm the last to know about yours."
"I'm not having an abortion," Meredith picked the gallon of chocolate ice cream off the floor.
"What?" Christina shrieked. "Are you insane? You can't really think you can raise this baby with this job."
"My mother did it."
"No, your father did it and when your mother took over she ruined you," Christina said straightly. Meredith started to tear up.
"This is why I didn't tell you, because I knew you would react like this. I wanted this to be my decision. I knew that you would try to force yours on me if I told you earlier. I'm not having an abortion, I want this baby and if you can't respect that… well than you're not who I thought you were." she turned her back and started scooping the ice cream, Emmie cheered. Christina looked down at her.
"Who are you Meredith? What happened to surgery hungry, sleep with your boss, nothing gets in my way, extraordinary, Meredith?"
"She got pregnant," Meredith yelled throwing the ice cream scooper in the sink. Emmie started to cry.
"Oh, good mother you'll be." Christina said sarcastically.
"Get out," Meredith pointed toward the door, she turned back to the sink and started to cry. She pulled herself together and walked back to Emmie and forced herself to smile. She gently wiped Emmie's tears away and fed her a bit of ice cream.
Moments later Izzie walked through the kitchen door.
"Hey," she said softly.
"Hi," Meredith smiled.
"You okay?" Izzie asked.
"Yeah," Meredith answered. "Aren't we Emmie," she said feeding her another bit. "Yes we are," she said in baby talk.
"Okay do remember that night," Izzie said sitting next to her, "You had just told me you had a real thing for Derek, and I don't even remember what was wrong with me but I was made cake and you were eating it with a fork," Izzie made a confused face, "Or maybe it was me. But anyway, someone was eating the whole cake with a fork and we were telling each other things."
"Yes," Meredith answered wiping her eyes.
"Can we have one of those nights tonight?" she asked.
"Yes" Meredith laughed.
"Okay I'm gonna go first, because my problems are tiny compared to your," Izzie said and then realized that probably wasn't what Meredith needed, "Sorry."
"It's okay," Meredith laughed.
"I slept with my intern," Izzie said and then covered her mouth, "and then I kissed him in the staircase."
Meredith laughed, "Oh, Iz."
"I know right," Izzie said. "You were in this position, you tell me, do I stop this now?"
"Do you like him?" Meredith asked.
"Yeah, I think I do. He's cocky and most of the time he's a bastard but then he smiles and you just know that he would never let anything happen to you."
"Oh you like him," Meredith laughed.
"Emmie! Izzie's in love," Meredith played. "Ot oh,"
"Ot, Oh," Emmie mocked.
"I think you should go for it. You only live once, why not sleep with your intern," Meredith laughed. "Really," Meredith said seriously, "What you are basically asking me is if I should have ended things with Derek in the beginning, before anything got complicated," Meredith exhaled. "And as much as I'd like to say I should have, I'd never do it, because we had twice as many good times as we did bad." Meredith's voice cracked again with emotion.
"It's his baby isn't it." Izzie stated.
"Iz, I don't know what to do," Meredith cried. Izzie put her arm around Meredith.
"Everyone is giving me their opinions, have the baby, don't have the baby, your crazy if you have this baby, your crazy if you don't have this baby. I don't want to listen to it anymore!"
"What do you want to do," Izzie asked softly, Meredith realized that Izzie was the first person who had asked her that.
"I want to have this baby, and I know it's stupid to think that I can have a career and be a single mother and I don't think I can do that. My mother chose her career over me, and I resent her for it. Maybe if she had been my mother instead of a surgeon, maybe I wouldn't have been so messed up. So this is my chance to either be my mother, or be a better mother than she was."
We are all good people when we have nothing to fight. When we have no problems, no reasons to yell or hate, but how often does that happen? Our defining moments are made of the choices we make in the most challenging times of our lives.
Mark looked into Addison's eyes and touch her face gently. He felt chills on her arms. He rubbed his hands slowly up her arms and then leaned in to kiss her. He kissed her passionately. She kissed him back, she had missed him so much. How could she have ever left this. Yes she had feelings for Pete, but she wasn't sure they were real. Maybe she was just trying to replace Mark. He kissed down her neck and then froze.
Whether we follow the path we have always taken, or choose to take a better one.
He pulled away, how could he do this to Erica. He was really falling for her and he was going to ruin it for the woman who ran from him and would run again at her first chance.
"Addison, I'm sorry," he sighed pulling away from her. "I can't, I just can't," he kissed her forehead and walked away.
As he shut the door to the hotel room, she realized that he had finally changed. He was now a truly good man, for that she was happy, but she was sad, that she wasn't the women he was going home to right now.
If we remember that others are not the only ones at fault, and take a little of the blame ourselves.
The truth is, fighting is the easy part. It's everything else that's difficult. It's easy to blame and hate and yell and cry and throw things, but it's not easy to take it back.
Callie and George are peacefully laying in bed. George is stroking her head lightly, they are both staring at the ceiling, their minds filling with all the reasons they had fallen in love with each other. They were both unable to recall the reasons they had fallen apart. George leans in and kisses her.
Most of the time there is no going back. No fixing things, so when life gives you a chance. You should take it, because it only comes once.
Alex and Rebbecca are sitting at the table in the restaurant just looking into each others eyes. It was amazing how they had been through so much together in such a short amount of time. To Rebbecca, Alex, felt like Emmie's father more than her real father did. Alex had been there her husband had not. Maybe that was her fault, but it didn't matter. She was in love with Alex.
It's life's way of letting us know, we can be better people than we are being.
Derek stared at Meredith's house, he felt like it was yesterday that he was leaving after their 'one night stand'. He could almost see himself walking down the front stairs. Then he realized he was leaning against his car. He pictured her drunkenly dancing on the porch. He smiled. God what am I doing here, he thought.
But like I said, second chances only happen once in a while and most of the time our character is measured by our only chance,
Derek breathed in deep and then started to head toward Meredith's house, he froze mid yard, remembering the feeling of kissing her there. He took one long look at her house, he sighed heavily. He walked back toward his car, reached for the car door handle, looked to the house again and then opened the car door, got in and drove away.
If we stand on the wrong side in that moment, we have lost who we are.