"I can't be married. I don't remember getting married! It doesn't count if you don't remember it. Right?" Rikku's voice was tinged with hysteria and Cid was a little afraid she might actually pass out. He pushed her back into a chair, shoving her head forward between her knees.

"Breathe, girl," he said, "yer gonna hyperventilate like that."

"That," she gasped, "is the least of my problems!"

"Aw, hell. Yer makin' too much outta this. Ya always did have a flair for the dramatic."

"Dramatic!" She sat up, forcing Cid's hands away. "You tell me I'm married to that…that arrogant, self-absorbed egomaniac, and you call me dramatic when I'm a little shocked?" Her face was flushed with anger. "This is the worst thing that's ever happened to me," she wailed. "How can I be married? It's not fair!"

"Life's not fair, kid, deal with it." He took a seat across from her, offering her a glass of water.

"I'm waiting."

Cid didn't like the way her fingers kept making subtle moves towards the dagger at her right hip.

"It was yer mother's idea," he said quickly. A muscle twitched in her cheek, and her fingers clenched.

"Mama died when I was three, Pops," she said patiently.

Cid rubbed the muscles at the nape of his neck, trying to decide where to begin.

"It took…days fer her ta die," he said. "She was in a lotta pain. Nothin' I could do fer her. Never felt so helpless in all my life." He loosened his collar a little, hoping to accommodate the lump growing in his throat. "Yer ma and Gippal's were friends way back. They always talked about their kids getting' hitched someday. They hoped…yer ma hoped you and Gippal woulda fell in love on yer own eventually, but when we knew…when we knew that yer ma wasn't gonna make it…" He sighed, splaying out his fingers entreatingly. "I woulda done anything to help her pass over happy, kid."

Her lips pursed thoughtfully. "So if Gippal had been a girl, Brother would've been your sacrificial lamb?"

"Yeah," he said, "that's about the size of it."

"You are such a bastard." She stood, pushing back from the table. "God, I hate this family."

She stalked angrily towards the entrance to the small hut, shoving aside the cloth covers. Cid was pretty sure that if he'd had a front door, she would've slammed it behind her.

But then, he couldn't really blame her.

- -

"What the hell do you think you're doing, kid?" Gippal dropped onto the barstool beside her, ignoring her irritated glare.

"I'm getting a haircut," she said sarcastically, tossing back the liquor in her glass. She slid it across to the bartender, who, obligingly, refilled it. "What does it look like I'm doing?" She downed her second glass, grimacing.

"It looks like you're making a hell of a mistake. Have you ever had that much alcohol before?"

"Once." She winced. "Not a good night. Or a good morning."

"And you're in such a hurry for a repeat performance. Smart, kid." He grabbed the shot glass as the bartender slid it back towards them, slugging the liquor down himself. "No more for her, Mal. I'll take another, though."

"Just who do you think you are?"

"Your husband." He downed his second glass. "You're underage. That makes me your legal guardian, until such a time as your reach your majority."

"You knew."

"Yeah, I knew."

"This is your fault!"

"I was four." He slammed a fist on the countertop. "I barely even remember it. How the hell is it my fault?"

"I don't remember it." She hiccoughed, surprised when tears sprang to her eyes. She wiped them away, horrified. "I don't remember." She hiccoughed again. "This is a nightmare."

"It's not so bad," he said. "I know tons of girls that would kill to be married to me."

"Not me." She was hunched over the counter, head in hands. "That ship has sailed."

He patted her back awkwardly. "Look at the bright side."

"There's a bright side?"

"Funny." He tossed a handful of salted peanuts into his mouth, chewing thoughtfully. "You coulda done worse, you know. I'm well-off, good-looking, smart…just about everything a girl could want in a guy."

"So find another girl. We'll get an annulment."

"Can't get an annulment if you've already had a wedding night."

She blushed to the roots of her hair. "That was a mistake. It was a long time ago. I didn't know we were…married."

"I did. I almost told you, then. But then you found out I was leaving for the Crimson Squad, and you wouldn't give me the time of day."

"I'll divorce you, then." She didn't like talking about their past. She'd never forgiven him for leaving. She didn't think she ever would.

"We don't divorce."

She knew he was talking about the Al Bhed. Marriage was a serious undertaking, a permanent, unbreakable bond. No Al Bhed had ever divorced their spouse. It was forbidden. Impossible.

"I'll convert."

"Yevon wouldn't have you." He sighed. "You're stuck with me, kid. We're stuck with each other."

"Like hell we are." Disgusted, she shoved her chair back, tossing a handful of gil on the bar. "I didn't ask for this. I'll be damned if I'm just gonna let everyone else decide my life for me."

"Look, would you just wait a minute?" He settled his own tab and followed her out of the bar.

"Why should I? You only lied to me my entire life."

"I didn't lie. Exactly. We just…decided we should wait awhile to bring you up to speed." He fell into step beside her, walking down the High Road towards Luca. "Where are we going, anyhow?"

"I am going to Luca. Fortunately, there are a few bars that will serve me alcohol regardless of whether or not you have a problem with it. Just in case you managed to miss it, I'm kind of a heroine." She crossed her arms, maintaining a space between them large enough to ride a chocobo through.

"Yeah, you're aheroine who happens to be completely dependent upon the wishes of her husband. You've got nearly a year and a half until you're twenty-one, honey, do you really wanna piss me off now?"

"Take a long walk off a short pier," she hissed. Her dramatic statement was ruined when she stumbled over a rock and pitched head first onto the rocky dirt road.

"Can't hold your liquor as it is, and you think you need more?" He offered her his hand, which she ignored, scrambling up on her own and brushing the dust off her skirt. "Why can't you just accept my help? Would it kill you to give me the benefit of the doubt?"

"So you harass and threaten me, and I'm supposed to just pretend that everything's just peachy keen between us?"

"Look, you're mad, I get that." He shoved his hands in his pockets. "But don't you think-"

"I'm not…I'm not just mad." She made an irritated sound, swiping away a couple tears that managed to slip past her defenses. "Maybe you're not mad, maybe you're not shocked or surprised or…or scared, but you've had seventeen years to get used to it. You grew up knowing all this. I've known for four hours." She dropped down on a rock, rubbing her hands over her face. "The only reason Pops even told me was because he thought I was gonna get married."

"To whom?" It was news to him; when Cid had told him Rikku had gone off in a rage he'd mentioned nothing about what had prompted him to finally disclose the truth to her.

"Some guy." She motioned vaguely.

"Some guy? You were thinking of marrying some guy?"

"I wasn't gonna marry him." She scowled. "Is it really that important for you to know who he is?"

He sighed. "D'you think we can have a normal conversation for once?" He took a seat on the ground in front of her. "You know," he said quietly, "once you wouldn't have thought being married to me was the end of the world."

"I don't want to talk about that," she said. "It's past. Over. I just want to forget it ever happened."

"We're not kids anymore," he replied. "We were young, we were stupid, we weren't ready for a relationship. We definitely weren't ready for marriage, and yeah, it kind of sucks that we don't get a choice anymore, that we can't just decide to be together because we want to be. But that doesn't mean we're destined to hate each other and be bitter and unhappy for the rest of our lives. We can make the best of it."

"I don't want to make the best of it." She stood, turning away from him. "Don't you understand even a little? I don't want to spend my life living with the consequences of other people's actions!"

He knew what she meant, what she was talking about, but it still didn't make much sense to him. He was in the same position she was, and he wasn't bitching and moaning about the loss of his freedom, his rights. He'd accepted it, moved on, and was working towards creating a happy life for himself. And he'd share it with her if she'd just shut up and let him.

"Look, everyone's gotta do things they don't wanna do sometimes. It's part of life." He moved towards her a little, setting his hands on her shoulders in what he hoped was a comforting gesture. She shrugged them off, rounding on him.

"See, that is where you're wrong. You can go do whatever you want to. I intend to go back to Luca and have the time of my life. I'm young, I'm reasonably attractive…hell, I'm even willing to bet that Keran won't mind so much that I've got a husband. Maybe I'll get lucky! Maybe Yevonites don't consider Al Bhed rituals binding. I could end up with a husband I actually want someday." She stalked away from him, further down the dirt path towards Luca. He knew she was lashing out in anger, but it still stung. He didn't even know her well enough anymore to be able to judge whether or not it was an empty threat.

"Fine!" he spat angrily. "Go and shack up with your little fuck-buddy! See if I care!"

"I will," she shouted back towards him.

He threw his hands in the air, growling his frustration. There was just no reasoning with her when she was in a temper. Irritated, he watched her walk out of sight, and then went back the way they'd come towards Rin's to retrieve his hover.

For a while he considered waiting out her rage, but it occurred to him that in her present state of mind, and with her natural inclination towards impulsiveness, she was highly likely to do something she might regret later on, and it was definitely his responsibility to see that she didn't get herself hurt. And he had to admit to himself that the idea of outing her as a married woman to all of Luca wasn't exactly unappealing.

Only she wasn't in Luca. He'd never considered the possibility that he wouldn't find her, but he'd searched every bar in the damn city with no success, and he had absolutely no idea where she'd be. And he had no idea how volatile she'd be when he finally managed to locate her. He just didn't know how to handle her anymore. He'd known four years ago. Everything had been so much simpler then. Now he didn't know her, he had no idea what would make her happy, what could possibly return them to the happy couple they'd been in their mid-teens.

And he was pretty much in desperate need of advice.

- -

Yuna, Gippal decided, was a better listener than her younger cousin. She sat very still and listened to his whole story without interrupting, nodding now and again to indicate she was actually listening.

It had been quite late when he'd arrived on Besaid, but she'd calmly followed him out to the ever-burning bonfire in the center of the village, feeding the flames every now and again with a couple of sticks as the whole story came pouring out of him.

"I see," she said slowly, when he'd finished. "Well, it sounds to me like you're screwed."

He blinked. "Huh?"

"You're screwed," she repeated calmly. "You lied to her."

"I didn't lie. Exactly." He was getting damn sick and tired of repeating himself and explaining himself all the time. He ran a whole faction! He didn't have to explain himself to anyone!

"A lie by omission is still a lie."

He didn't like that much. Somehow he'd been operating under the expectation that Yuna could solve his problem, wrap the answer up in a pretty little bow for him, and he could go on his merry way with Rikku and be happy and content for the rest of his life. Yuna had the answers. She always had the answers.

"Look, it's a complicated situation." He shoved his fingers through his hair.

"It's not that complicated. Granted most of it isn't your fault, but you're still involved. You still lied to her for her entire life."

Rikku had said something similar.

"Maybe it's not the ideal situation, but everyone's gotta sacrifice sometimes," he began.

"Good god, you didn't tell her that, did you?" She looked downright horrified. His eyebrows rose.

"Uh, well…sort of. What was I supposed to tell her?"

"Anything but that!" She made an irritated sound in the back of her throat. "Look, you and Cid eventually robbed her of everything she's ever wanted. She's never going to get a romantic courtship, a fairy-tale wedding, a happily-ever-after. Cid took her right to choose, and you took her right to know the truth."

"He thought it was best for her not to know for a while." Somehow now the excuse seemed a little too wishy-washy. It wasn't that she wasn't ready; it was that they didn't want to deal with her anger, her hurt.

"And then you tell her she's got to sacrifice because someone else made a stupid decision."

Well, when she put it that way it sounded a little insensitive.

"It's not all that big of a deal. Everyone thought we'd get married eventually anyway." He knew he was sulking a little. He wasn't accustomed to being chastised.

"It is a very big deal. You've lived with it all your life; she's lived with it for a few hours. She's losing something of herself to you, something she can never get back, something that was hers to give but was taken from her." She sounded disappointed, upset. Probably she was indignant over the way her cousin had been cheated.

Okay, so he'd been a jerk. A big jerk. Maybe it was because he hadn't thought she'd be so angry, he'd thought she'd just…just be happy to be with him or something. He'd never once thought he couldn't make her happy, but with the way he'd made an ass of himself, she might not even give him a chance to try.

"Did you even tell her you love her?"

He averted his eyes, unable to take Yuna's piercing gaze.

"Do you love her?"

"Of course I do!" he snapped. "D'you think I woulda come her if I didn't? If I didn't care about her, why would I be here getting my ass handed to me? I want to make things right."

"Easier said than done," Yuna sighed. "You made the absolute worst of an already bad situation."

"I'm beginning to realize that," he said dryly. "So can you help me? Like it or not, she's married to me, you know. If she'd just let me, I could make her happy. I'd love her so much she'd never regret being married to me."

"It could be a long time before she stops being angry with you."

"I can wait. I've waited nearly seventeen years already." He stood, helping her to her feet carefully.

"You're going to have to be patient with her. She's certainly entitled to a tantrum or two what with how she'd been treated. Let her scream and shout if she wants to. And, Gippal, for Spira's sake, tell her you love her."

"I would," he said, "only she said she was going to Luca, and she's not there anymore. I looked for her everywhere. I don't even know where to start looking."

"Try my living room," she quipped. "She never went to Luca. She's been here for hours. She cried herself hoarse, called you several names that I am loathe to repeat, cried some more, and finally fell asleep on my couch."

"So you knew all this even before I told you."

"Pretty much. I felt you deserved to be at least as miserable as you've made my cousin." Her pointed glare made him flush.

"Vindictiveness in a former summoner," he said thoughtfully. "Huh. That was unexpected."

She ignored him. "I'll let you have her on one condition."

"She's my wife."

"She's my cousin. Also I've got this big summoner's staff that is just wonderful

for beating stubborn men over the head with."

"Point taken. What's the condition?" He grimaced.

"Take good care of her. Don't make her cry anymore. And apologize. She trusted you and you blew it."

"That's three conditions."

"Suck it up. Do you promise?" She put her hands on her hips, blocking the entryway to her hut.

"Yeah, I promise."

She pushed aside the flap, and he followed her inside. It was dark, but he could see her curled up on the couch, a blanket draped over her. Carefully he rolled her into his arms, wrapped tightly in the blanket. He brushed his fingers over her cheeks, feeling the gritty salt her tears had left. Guilt swamped him.

"Need some sleep powder for the ride? She's not going to be too happy if she wakes up."

He was surprised she was offering. "No, I don't think so. She's a pretty sound sleeper. Thanks, though."

She shrugged. "Well, good night, then. I won't keep you." She disappeared into the back room where he assumed Tidus was asleep, and he silently left the hut.

It was going to be a rather long journey back to Djose. But at the very least, he'd gotten what he'd come for.