Red vs blue episode 4
Abbal is running at the red base full throttle he stops for a second to catch his breath and then resumes running
Abbal
Huf Puff... Charge!! I will still save you!!
Bullor
Holy crap! Look at that moronic douchebag run!
manny
It must be nature's way of compensating.
To red base
JERRY
Wow! That guy's coming at us pretty fast!
Elaine
Its my brother!
JERRY
Your brother's the general! Holy crap. You have friends in high places! What are you doing in a crap hole like this?
GEORGE
Jerry. Shut the hell up man! He's not their Goddamn General! Elaine. Didn't you say something about how your brother is a complete klutz and that through a series of random events he might end up stealing our flag because he is so stupid?
ELAINE
No. Why?
JERRY
Totally wiped out loser. Ha ha ha ha ha. You made yourself look like a moron! The Maroon moron heh heh heh.
GEORGE
Fuck you faggot. Now help me shoot this guy.
Jerry and George shoot at Abbal but keep missing much to their annoyance
JERRY
What the hell man! I keep missing! I'm calling in an air strike.
Scene switches to vic
Vic
Yello Yello dude. How are things swinging down at old red base? Uh.. you guys winning?
JERRY
Hey Vic help us out man I need an air strike to kill this kamikaze guy!
VIC
Okay dude. Don't get your panties in a twist. I'll see what I can do. In the meantime... don't die okay dude.
JERRY
Yeah, no shit jerk.
VIC
Yo F.Y.I Dude you never hung up just so ya know.
JERRY
Whatever. (Click)
JERRY
Yeah I think that we're on our own.
GEORGE
Alright let's try some grenades.
Elaine hits Jerry in the back of the head and shoots George in the foot. She then jumps off the base and yells...
ELAINE
Abbal! Run!
ABBAL
No I won't!
George shoots and hits him.
ABBAL
Okay! Lets go!
Jerry
VIC
Yo dude. That air strike you wanted? Coming right up courtesy Of Me solo Vicy.
A banshee comes in and starts attacking.
ELAINE
Take cover!
ABBAL
I gotcha! (Starts jumping around) Here I am! Right over here! Me, the Blue one! And this is my sister! The Green one!
ELAINE
Shut up!!
ABBAL
Oh sorry!
Bullor runs up and jumps off the ledge with a rocket launcher in his hand, shooting the banshee. Manny then takes a shotgun and blasts the driver of it in the head. The General Jumps in a warthog and starts driving to get Abbal and Elaine. Elaine Hops in the gunner seat and Abbal gets in the Passenger seat. Bullor and Manny cover them, while Elaine pins down the reds.
GEORGE
Wow sir. Next time you pick a soldier with a name somehow related to our name DON'T!
General
Oh my God! I just don't know how this happened!
JERRY
Wow. Doesn't that sound so familiar. I think I,ve heard that a dozen times in the past week!
GENERAL
(Stuttering) Thththat iiis insubordination ssssoldier.
JERRY
Shove it up your ass sir.
Back at blue base
ELAINE
I don't know who you guys are. But thanks for saving me and my brother.
BULLOR
Yeah you're welcome. Bitch.
ABBAL
C'mon guys. Don't be so cruel. She's my sister!
GENERAL
Abbal. Just, just like go wait in the corner. mm k?
ELAINE
I have to go back.
MANNY
What! You just got here! Stay a while please!
ELAINE
Those were the orders from command. And I've never questioned orders from command. Just tell Abbal that I,ve been discharged or something like that.
MANNY
No! Don't go. If you go we might end up fighting and I couldn't take that not ever, not now! Not after we've known each other for so long.
ELAINE
2 minutes?
MANNY
It's been longer for me...
ELAINE
Aw aren't you sweet.
MANNY
Fuck the parka. I'm just happy about this armor.
BULLOR
Yeah. That it cover your blushing. Haha Haha.
MANNY
Shove it.
ELAINE
Well.. Later Assholes!
She jumps off the building and runs towards the red base.
JERRY
You little bitch! First you hit me in the back of the head, then you shoot George in the foot. You then proceed to eliminate our air strike... Glad to have you back soldier! Wow you're strong!
Elaine moves right up into Jerry's face.
ELAINE
Just be glad that you missed.
JERRY
Um... Yeah.
GEORGE
Jerry, I'm scared!
ELAINE
Oh, stop whining you pussys.
Fade to black.
GENERAL
Well! Another victory for the red squad!
GEORGE
Sir?
GENERAL
Yyyes?
GEORGE
Sigh... Nothing. Why did we get such an incompetent dumbass for a General?
Jerry
Umm... Because you're gay?
George
Go to hell Jerry.
Jerry
I love you too man!
George
Are you that retarded?
Jerry
... Possibly.
GEORGE
... Sigh.