Despite the fact that she had assured him that she was neither anxious nor worried, he saw the truth of it come out at night. She slept fitfully – if, indeed, she slept at all. And because she tossed and turned and thrashed all night, in the grips of what seemed to be terrifying nightmares, he was lucky if he got an hour of undisturbed rest all night. Finally, after so many nights with little sleep, he caught her in his arms at the peak of her thrashing, pressing her cheek to his chest to hush her frightened whimpers. To his surprise, she quieted right down, snuggled up against him, and slept easily the rest of the night.

It was his first restful night's sleep in almost a week, and he wasn't about to let it end with one.

But the next night, when he finally came to bed and drew her into his arms, she protested.

"That's really not necessary," she said, pushing away from him. "I'm not a child. I don't want to be treated like one." She was frustrated with being coddled, with no longer being the mistress of her own destiny. And maybe she was going a little stir-crazy, being kept inside all day. She wanted fresh air and sunshine. She wasn't at all accustomed to confinement and she didn't much like it.

"I'm not trying to treat you like a kid," he said, bemused. "I just want to get some sleep."

"Then get some." She flipped around, facing the wall. He made an irritated sound in the back of his throat, and reached for her again.

"Look," he began, when he had her securely tucked up against him. "For the past week you've been keeping me up at night with some pretty nasty nightmares. Last night when you were thrashing around, I pulled you close, like this." He pressed her head to his shoulder and wrapped his free arm around her waist. "And you calmed down right away and we both got a good night's sleep for once."

"I was really keeping you up at night?"

"Yeah," he said. "You kept kicking me and stuff. At first, I thought you were doing it on purpose. But then you started making these really awful little whimpering sounds." He didn't tell her how much those sounds had wrenched his heart, how worried he'd been for her.

"I'm sorry," she said slowly. "I didn't know. I can sleep on a couch or something. I didn't mean to keep you awake."

"You're in here for a reason," he reminded her. "I'm not mad. I just want us to be able to get some sleep. You can't help it if you get nightmares. Has it occurred to you that maybe the reason you calmed down last night is because I make you feel safe?"

It had occurred to her, but that didn't mean she felt comfortable discussing the possibility. She didn't want to be held. Being held made her remember things she wanted so badly to forget. She didn't want to wake up in his arms thinking maybe she'd dreamed the last few years. She didn't want reality to come crashing down on her moments later, when he reminded her not to leave the temple just like he'd done every day for the past week.

But she owed him a good night's sleep at least, and if this was the only way he thought he'd get it, she'd do it.

"You know," he remarked wryly, "you don't have to sound like it's going to kill you."

"What?"

"You let out this big sigh, like you were making some sort of huge sacrifice. Well, I'll have you know, it's a pretty damn big sacrifice on my part as well," he grumbled.

"Just exactly how is it such a big sacrifice for you?" She inquired, offended.

"Don't you know?" He shifted, placing his hand at the small of her back and drawing her closer. Their hips touched and she swallowed a gasp as she felt him hard and hot against her. His warm breath stirred the fine hair at her ear. She struggled just to take a proper breath.

"Don't you know what it does to me, to have you so close?" he murmured. "Last night, we were lying just like this, only you were all warm and soft and I could feel all of you against me." His palm curved over her rear, gently fitting her hips more firmly to his. Her breath hitched in her throat; her hands curled into fists, but stayed uselessly tucked up under her chin. She couldn't help the little shudder that slipped down her spine. He knew she wasn't cold, but he drew the blankets up around them anyway.

She knew she shouldn't let him kiss her. Kissing would lead to other things and those other things would lead to another month of worrying whether or not they were going to be parents. But, as his lips brushed hers, she couldn't seem to make herself tell him to stop. He tugged her lower lip with his teeth and lazily stroked her tongue with his. Several minutes later, when she felt his fingers sliding slowly beneath her camisole, she had the presence of mind to draw back just a little, pressing her small hands against his chest.

"W-we can't do this," she said. "Gippal, if I got pregnant right now, I'd be putting an innocent life at risk. I can't do that. You know I can't," she pleaded. She hadn't wanted to lead him on – she should never have let him kiss her at all.

"But you want to," he said slowly. His fingers hadn't stopped their inexorable slid up her stomach – only slowed somewhat. She had to make him understand before he got too far and she forgot her argument.

"I want to," she agreed. "But I can't. I can't risk pregnancy right now." His thumb brushed the underside of her breast, and she bit back a moan.

"You won't get pregnant."

"Huh?" Her eyes had fluttered closed at some point, and she had to make an effort to remember what they'd been talking about.

He chuckled. "You won't get pregnant. I went into Luca a couple days ago, and picked up some potions to prevent it." Gently he tugged her camisole over her head, baring her breasts. Her arms crossed across her chest even as he turned them, pushing her onto her back.

"You planned this?" She glared mutinously up at him.

"Not 'planned' so much as 'prepared for the inevitable'," he defended. "We've always been like this, Rikku. How long do you really think I could have you in my home, in my bed, in my arms without making love to you?"

He bent down to kiss the frown from her lips, and in just a few moments she was no longer thinking of anything but him.

---

Two days later, Rikku was watching him sort through mail in his office, helping him with his correspondence to save herself from dying of sheer boredom. He used a knife to neatly slice each letter open, scanned its contents briefly, then sorted them into piles – bills and correspondence – which he handed off to Rikku, along with his checkbook.

Except for one letter, which had come in a plain white envelope. That one he'd read and promptly stuck in a drawer in his desk. She'd asked about it, of course, but he'd informed her it was nothing she needed to be concerned with, and refused to discuss the issue.

But his face as he'd read the letter had told her all she needed to know. It did concern her, and not in a good way. Though he'd managed to keep his expression fairly neutral, she'd noticed his jaw clenching just a little, and he'd closed the drawer with slightly more force than necessary.

And he'd actually locked it. She hadn't found that out until much later, but that little tidbit had clinched it. He was hiding things from her again. He was treating her like a child again, pushing aside her right to know the truth in favor of his desire to keep it from her, to keep her sheltered like some sort of delicate, fragile thing.

But she wasn't. She wasn't delicate or fragile, and she definitely didn't want to live her life as a decoration on a shelf, protected and out of reach and ignored. She had a right to know what was going on. And if he wasn't going to tell her, well, then she'd just have to find out for herself.

And the letters kept on coming at a rate of a few a week, and he just read them as casually as if they'd been bills or bank statements, and tucked them into that drawer. As he began acting more and more suspicious – late-night commsphere calls, unnecessary trips into the city when he'd been the day before – she began getting more and more nervous. She'd had an unsettled feeling in the pit of her stomach for more than a week, and he hadn't done anything to alleviate any of her fears.

So finally, one night, she waited until she was certain he was asleep before ever so carefully slipping from his arms and out of the room. Then she crept down to his office, and picked the lock on his desk drawer. She dug around inside, drawing out a fistful of letters, and plopping down in his office chair to read them. It didn't take more than a few of them to get the gist of them – they were all from Xac.

While mostly filled with hateful racial slurs and the occasional demand for Rikku to stop being a coward and come out of hiding, they also contained several insinuations that he would be more than happy to rid Spira of Rikku's 'half-breed abomination of a cousin' should Rikku fail to meet his demands.

The icy knot of fear in her stomach expanded, prickling the hairs on the back of her neck. She had to get to Yuna. She had to get to Yuna now.

---

Gippal woke up to find Rikku straddling his waist. A lamp emitted a soft glow across the room, but the clock at the bedside told him it was just after two in the morning.

"It's too early to be up," he murmured. "Come on, honey, let's go back to sleep."

"I've got to go to Besaid. I need to check on Yuna," she said, her voice low and urgent.

"It's not a good idea," he said. "We agreed we'd keep you here, out of the way, for a while."

"Your mistake," she said tightly. Too late he noticed the stack of letters she held in one hand. Cold metal kissed his bare chest, and he looked down to find her pressing the barrel of his pistol against his chest. "I'm not asking. You can take me to Besaid right now or I can blow a very, very large hole in your chest."

She was angry – angrier than he'd ever seen her – and that made her unpredictable. He didn't believe that she'd actually hurt him, regardless of what she said, but if he didn't take her, he was a little afraid that she'd try to take his airship anyway, and he was fairly sure she didn't know how to fly it. She was shaking so hard anyway – with fear or anger, he wasn't sure – that he didn't quite know how she'd managed to avoid blowing a hold in his chest thus far.

"I'll take you," he said. "Just let me get dressed, okay? I'd also appreciate it if you'd refrain from shooting me. I've been shot too many times in my life already."

"Just shut up and get dressed." She hopped off the bed, looking and sounding thoroughly disgusted with him. "If you're not ready in five minutes, you can fly the ship naked for all I care." She slammed the door on her way out.

---

She was jittery the entire trip, pacing the length of the bridge and wringing her hands anxiously. Twice she'd left the gun she'd held on him – his ­gun – on the seat she'd vacated, and the second time she'd left it, he'd snatched it up and shoved it in his holster where it belonged. He knew she was afraid he'd turn back now that she no longer had a weapon on her, but she probably hadn't considered the fact that her obvious distress was the biggest weapon she possessed – he would take her all the way to Besaid just to prove to her that Yuna was all right if it would calm her down.

His casual suggestion that she head down to the cabin for a short nap was met with a dark glare.

"I'm taking you to Besaid," he said, hoping to reassure her. "I want you to see that they're okay, that nothing is going to happen to Yuna. That guy isn't going to get to her." He wanted to reassure her without saying too much – he didn't want to mess up and accidentally let slip any of the things he'd learned about the man. There was no sense in letting her worry about a man who was never going to get within a hundred feet of her ever again.

"When you see that Yuna's okay, you'll come back to Djose, won't you?" he asked as he docked the airship on the beach. "I just want to keep you safe, Rikku. It's rather hard to do when I don't know where you are."

She pursed her lips. "If Yuna's really okay, if that man hasn't…" she trailed off, unable to finish the thought. "If Yuna's okay, I'll go back to Djose," she said finally.

They traveled the winding roads in silence, only to be met by Yuna at the entrance to Besaid village. Her cheeks were flushed with excitement.

"How'd you two get here so fast?" She asked, hands on her hips, as surprised to see them as they were to see her. "Never mind," she said, "that Xac guy showed up. Come on, I'll take you to him."

"He did?" Rikku gasped.

"What happened?" Gippal demanded.

"I bashed him over the head with my summoner's staff," she said cheerfully. "I told you it was good for beating people over the head with. Tidus is sitting on him right now. He's got my staff, so if that guy wakes up, Tidus'll just hit him again."

They followed her to a little trail off the beaten path of the road, down to a little alcove where Tidus was seated firmly upon the back of a bound, unconscious man.

"How'd they get here so fast?" He asked.

"I had a bad feeling," Rikku said. "I made Gippal bring me here. It looks like it was a good thing, too." She shot a meaningful look at Gippal.

Tidus got up, poking the man in the back with Yuna's staff to make sure he was still unconscious. He didn't get so much as a groan.

"Saves me the trouble of hunting him down," Gippal said. "Tidus, you think you could help me drag this sack of garbage to my airship?"

"We sure as hell don't want him here. You're more than welcome to him," Tidus replied. Tidus grabbed the man's hands, and Gippal grabbed his feet, and together they carried him out of the village and down towards the beach.

"I'm so glad you're okay," Rikku whispered to Yuna. "I was…so worried." She wiped away a few helpless tears, unsure if she should be angry that Yuna had been placed in such danger or relieved that it was all over.

"I told you we were fine," Yuna said back. "I know you think of yourself as my protector, Rikku, and you've been very good to me, but I can actually take care of myself now. You shouldn't have to give up any more of your life to keep me safe."

"I never thought of it like that, Yunie," Rikku replied. "You were always my cousin, my best friend. I would have done anything to keep you safe."

"I'm grateful," Yuna said. "But now that I can take care of myself, don't you think it's time you let yourself be happy?" She nodded toward Gippal, who had reappeared with Tidus at the entrance to the village, and were now engrossed in conversation.

"Yunie, I don't think…"

"I do," Yuna interrupted. "Rikku, you're everything to him. It's…it's so easy to see. I really do think you should give him another chance. He loves you very much. And he is your husband, after all."

It was the wrong thing to say. Rikku's face closed up immediately. "Yes," she said. "He is that."

"Rikku, you're staying here for a little while," Gippal said as he and Tidus approached. "I've got something I have to do, but I'll be back for you in a couple of hours. A day, at the most."

"What?" she spluttered. "Where are you going?"

"Zanarkand," he said.

"Zanarkand? Why Zanarkand? There's nothing in Zanarkand but monkeys."

"I know. That's where I'm taking our little friend. He's in the hold of my airship right now." He slid his gun out of his pockets, checking the magazine to make sure it was loaded. Satisfied, he re-holstered the weapon.

"What're you going to do with him in Zanarkand? The nearest police station is miles away from there. And why do I have to stay here?" Rikku sounded completely and utterly puzzled.

"I'm not taking you with me because I'm not taking him to the police, Rikku," he said gently. "I'm taking him to Zanarkand to kill him."