This what-if laid half-finished and forgotten for a long while. With my muse back, the time came to get down to it. I've dedicated a whole story to the stairs incident. This is a different take. Hope you enjoy!

PS: The bold text is straight from the canon. Obviously, I owe nothing.

Chapter 5: The stairs

"You are looking pale, Mrs. Butler. Is there a shortage of rouge? Or can this wanness mean that you've been missing me?" he asked casually and though his lips smiled, his eyes did not.

So that was going to be his attitude. He was going to be as hateful as ever. Suddenly the child she was carrying became a nauseating burden instead of something she had gladly carried, and this man before her, standing carelessly with his wide Panama hat upon his hip, her bitterest foe, the cause of all her troubles. Hot words rushed to her mouth and she had to bite her lips hard to stop them. No, she wouldn't tell him like this. Not on the top of those stairs with servants who might hear. It would be half across town by supper time and during the past three months she had enough behind her back talking to last her a lifetime. No more.

"A shortage of rouge," there was venom in her eyes as she answered, venom that was too unmistakable to be missed, and the smile went from his face. "How was your trip?"

"Very pleasant, indeed," he drawled coolly. "My mother sends her greetings."

"How very king of her! She should come and visit sometime," she tried to match his tone.

She didn't want to be a part of that farse anymore, exchanging empty pleasantries in the place of curses. She needed to step away from this man. The man she had missed, the man whose child she was carrying.

"You must be tired," she started towards her bedroom. "See you at supper."

She walked as nonchalantly as she could master, feeling his piercing eyes at her back. Only when she closed the door, did she allow the tears to flow freely.

They didn't run onto each other for the rest of the day and she suspected that he too was avoiding her. Supper, however, proved to be a pleasant affair. Bonnie, for one, chose to spend the evening on her mother's lap instead of clinging to her father, like she normally did. Scarlett should probably have her in a chair next to her. But she had missed the child so much and apparently her little girl had missed her too, and she couldn't bring herself to let her go just yet. She would be following Rhett around soon enough anyway. She might as well enjoy what limited time she could get with her daughter in the meanwhile.

"Bonnie, you should let your mother eat properly," Rhett tried to interfere.

Both mother and daughter stared at him, but it was her gaze he held instead of Bonnie's irritated one. His eyes softened as he picked up on the silent request, and he nodded once.

More than that, Wade and Ella had clearly missed their stepfather too. Wade, in particular, had found his voice again, an ability he was often losing when alone with his mother, talking non-stop about things she ignored and barraging Rhett with questions about his travels. And he was more than willing to reciprocate, entertaining all four of them with the adventures from their time apart.

Anger and disappointment from his indifferent greeting now spent, she felt inexplicably content just to see him occupy his usual place on the table and listen to the sound of his voice. After three endless months, his physical presence seemed to liven everything and everyone up; the house was warmer, the food tasted better, the children were cheerful, the servants were smiling. The evident tension between them eased, even temporarily, and soon the talking and laughing around the table helped her relax. His storytelling evoked Wade's giggles and Ella's squeals. Bonnie, as joyful as ever, showered her with attention, caressing her and feeding her in the mouth. Yes, she had been angry and hurt, but now they were back –he was back– and life was fun again.

"There are presents for everyone in the parlor," he announced.

The older children stormed out of the dining room, Bonnie trying to catch up with them with her short plump legs.

"Come on, Mama! Come on!" she called over her shoulder.

"I'm right behind you, precious!" she couldn't help a tender laugh.

It was customary for Rhett to bring them gifts back from his frequent trips, but this time around he had outdone himself. In one box, books, puzzles and a hand carved wooden chess set with knight chess pieces for Wade.

"Uncle Rhett, this is amazing!" Wade exclaimed.

"We are running a little behind on our chess lessons, son, but I will make it my top priority from now on," Rhett reassured him.

Was it guilt she saw in his eyes as he messed with the boy's hair?

A brand-new tea serving set, three dolls with their full wardrobe and bedtime stories for Ella in a second box. The girl, always expressive and affectionate especially with her stepfather, stormed into his embrace shrilling with excitement.

"I expect to have tea served tomorrow morning in the nursery, Ella darling!" he swept her up in his arms returning her kisses.

Soon enough Bonnie demanded her fair share of her father's pampering and he ended up with one girl on each shoulder. She smiled at the scene in front of her, purposely ignoring the stink of jealousy that Rhett's affection to the children always induced. He still hadn't touched her, not even by accident. Bonnie whispered something in his ear just then and he smirked approvingly.

"You can have the honor, sweetheart," he said and her daughter offered her a velvet box.

"For me?" she was completely taken by surprise.

"Open it, Mama!" she was jumping up and down with anticipation. "Open it!"

A pair of emerald teardrop earrings laid in the box along with a matching necklace.

"You like them, Mama?"

"Of course, I like them, my darling!" she caressed the little face. "They are beautiful!"

"I pick them!"

"You did?"

"Yes! Tell her, Daddy!"

"Green like Mother's eyes, I believe her exact words were," Rhett provided.

"Well, that makes them all the more special," she said throatily and left a soft kiss on her daughter's forehead. "Thank you very much."

"Wear them," the girl went on with unabated enthusiasm.

"What, now?"

"Yes, Mama, now!"

"Wear them, Mother!" Ella joined.

"Alright then," she went along.

She put on the earrings first and then the necklace, but failed with the clasp.

"Permit me," Rhett said and before she had a chance to react, she felt his warm fingers touching the back of her neck.

A powerful shiver run down her spine spreading goosebumps on her skin and along with it came several uninvited recollections. Neither the place nor the time were appropriate though and she turned instantly crimson.

"How do I look?" she tried to mask her uneasiness slightly tossing her head to make the earrings swing.

"Are you hot, Mother?" Wade wondered at her unnaturally flushed cheeks.

"She is merely blushing, son," Rhett chuckled.

She shot him an irritated look, but his dark eyes were gleaming playfully, an amused grin on his lips, and she found herself laughing giddily. He was such an incurable teaser!

She had hoped for some time alone with him after the children would retire for the night –she had important news to share after all–, but Bonnie saw that she didn't. As soon as Rhett announced it was time for bed, she found herself being dragged by the hands of her daughter urging her to follow them upstairs.

"You read me a story, Mama."

"Go ahead, Scarlett," he stunned her. "I'll tuck Wade and Ella in."

She eyed him suspiciously. Since when was she granted access to the child? But Ella was following her sister's example, thrilled to have her stepfather to herself after so long, and she didn't get a chance to see his face.

Barely through the first few lines Bonnie had fallen asleep, exhausted from the travel and the excitement of being back home. Yet, she was reluctant to leave. When was the last time she had put her to sleep? To her profound embarrassment, she couldn't remember. She relished on the dark head resting on her bosom and the weight of the small arm around her waist. She buried her nose in the ruffled hair, her eyes shut, and breathed her in.

"I've missed you so much, baby girl," she whispered.

"She has missed you too," his voice literally made her jump.

He was leaning against the door frame, God knows for how long, a soft smile on his lips.

"Is this why you came back?"

"Apparently, even a bad–"

"Don't be spiteful," she cut him off. "You know damn well that I love my children."

The evident hurt in her voice sobered him.

"I do," he nodded.

She carefully untangled herself from Bonnie's embrace and after a light peck on her forehead stood to leave; the way his eyes were following her every move was making her uncomfortable. She hovered at the door next to him for a moment as if to tell him about the baby, she couldn't bring herself to do it though.

"Welcome back, Rhett," she said quietly instead.

"Good to be back, Scarlett."

He touched her hand with his knuckles ever so lightly. Startled she gave him a sideways look, trying to decipher his expression, but his face turned blank in a blink and her shoulders sank.

"Goodnight," she sighed and started for her room.

It wasn't a restful night. She was tired and stressed and yet, she couldn't ease her mind. She kept replaying the day again and again unable to decide what to make of it. She was, of course, overjoyed with Bonnie's affections. And after their first heated encounter, she and Rhett had been civil enough. They had laughed and talked and enjoyed their evening as a family. But his overall posture was confusing, gentle one moment and ready to strike with malice the very next. She tossed and turned for hours before sleep finally claimed her. It felt too soon when Mammie pulled the curtains open the next morning. She fiddled with the breakfast tray she placed on her lap, not feeling hungry at all, until she grudgingly got out of bed to start with her day.

"Is Captain Butler home?"

"Yus, Mam'. His in de nursery wid de children," Prissy provided while tying her corset.

She knew she had to seek him, but she dreaded being alone with him, her emotional state too fragile for his usual jeering self. When she came out of her bedroom, she still hadn't made up her mind.

Apparently, the baby took it upon itself to make its presence known. She had barely reached the stairs before a strong wave of morning sickness had her running back to her room with her hand on her mouth. In her rashness to make it to the basin, she didn't close the door. She was half way through expelling whatever breakfast she had had, when she felt a warm palm on her forehead holding her head and another keeping her hair away from her face. She wasn't allowed the luxury to be embarrassed. Her stomach wrenched painfully again and again and by the time it was over she was too exhausted to even bother. She succumbed to his strong arms supporting her and leading her to the armchair. He wiped her face with a wet cloth and brought a glass of water to her lips gently urging her to drink it and clean her mouth. He was sitting on his knees in front of her, when she finally opened her eyes. His fingers caressed a few stray locks off her face and the tenderness of the gesture warmed her. There was evident worry in his eyes as they wandered her face and she offered a weak smile.

"I'm alright now, thank you," she said quietly.

"It may have sounded like tasteless humor, but I wasn't really joking yesterday, Scarlett. You are looking pale. Should I call for Dr. Meade?"

She shook her head.

"There's no need. I've already been to the doctor."

"And…?"

She averted her eyes with a sigh.

"What's wrong, honey?" his voice strained with trepidation.

"Nothing is wrong. It's just… I… I'm pregnant, Rhett."

He sucked in his breath and pulling slightly away his eyes went rapidly over her, before boring into hers. In the place of prior worry, a flame was now building, growing stronger and stronger by the second. Delight? She didn't dare to hope.

"You are?" the warmth sprawled from his eyes to his voice, softening the hard lines of his jaw and curving a smile on his full lips.

She nodded, her brows knit in uncertainty. He put a hesitant palm on her stomach. When she didn't dodge, his fingers spread and caressed the hardly noticeable roundness there. And she knew beyond doubt how he felt.

"Are you pleased?" she asked all the same, just to hear him say it.

"Yes," he laughed hoarsely. "Of course, I'm pleased."

It was her turn to smile, placing her hand on his.

"Truly?"

She sure sounded like a ninny but that night was special, she rationalized. This baby was the outcome of that night and she needed it to be special for him too.

"Scarlett, we are going to have another child," his voice laced with emotion. "What's there not to be pleased about?"

"A baby boy would be nice," his unpretentious joy made her safe enough to say her secret wish out loud.

Her words broadened his smile even more and leaning in, he took her face between his hands.

"I take it that you are happy about it too then?"

"I am, Rhett. Very much so."

His eyes were afire by now. It was mesmerizing and intoxicating to see him looking at her like that and the breath caught in her throat. She felt silly for worrying about his reaction and at the same time guilty for keeping it from him even if only for a day.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you yesterday. I–"

Her apology was cut short, for his mouth covered hers, his lips gently provoking a reaction out of her. And it came with such force that he had to grab from the armchair to steady himself from falling backwards. He made a sound –a chuckle that sounded more like a moan in the end– and wrapping his arms around her back pulled her to his embrace. He deepened the kiss and then deepened it even more, his soft tongue thrusting into her mouth and teasing hers. Her head was swimming like she was drunk, her heart was throbbing and her mind was a complete blank. She felt him moving them to the armchair and his lips trying to slide down her neck, but she refused to part with them. She assaulted him with renewed ferocity, her fingers running through his sleek hair to hold him in place. An infinite while later, his hands cupped her face and gently broke them apart. Chests heaving and breathing in pants they stared at each other, green fire meeting black fire. He caressed her flashed cheeks and set to tidy her messy hair. And then his thumb brushed her swollen lips.

"God, I've missed these," he murmured.

"Oh, Rhett," she breathed and nestled her head on his shoulder. "They've missed you too."

Laughter rambled in his chest and his arms were once again around her keeping her close to him.

"You won't leave again?" it was meant to be a question, but came out as a plead.

His body beneath her stiffened. "Will you try not to give me another reason to?"

Anger over his blindness rushed through her and she tried to jerk away.

"There wasn't a reason to leave in the first place, you stupid fool!"

His hands grabbed her shoulders, holding her still, while his eyes searched her face. They were dark and inscrutable, yet she could see something powerful pulsing in their depths and when he spoke, that same something vibrated his voice. She felt inexplicably drawn to grasp its meaning.

"What are you saying, Scarlett?"

She didn't know how, but in that moment of rare clarity, she realized that her answer was of huge significance.

"You wouldn't have left, if I was caught in Melly's arms instead, would you?"

His jaw clenched and his grip tightened.

"That wasn't the case though," his voice warningly low.

"And you accuse me of seeing nothing unless it's under my nose," she mocked.

"Answer me, God damn you!" he shook her.

"Weren't you there that night too?" she cried and he gasped. "How can you still believe that it was anything like it is with you? It never was. It never could be."

"Never?" he breathed.

"No, Rhett, never. The mere notion is ridiculous."

He released her shoulders only to clasp her hands. And the harshness in his touch returned.

"You defended him that night, Scarlett. Why?"

"You were terrifying, that's why," she shivered at the thought. "I had no idea how to deal with all that anger. So, I did what I know best. I fought back. I probably wouldn't have explained it properly anyway. It all became clear in the morning."

He brought her hands on his lips. His moustache tingled, his breath was hot and his touch was electrifying and her head fell back with a sigh.

"The morning after?" he murmured then and the magic was instantly lost.

Her hands in his tensed and he raised his eyes perplexed only to meet with her hard look.

"The morning you weren't there and the three days I waited for you to come home," she stated bluntly.

"I have some explaining to do too, don't I?" She said nothing, so he went on. "I was insane that night and more drunk than I'd been in very, very long time. I lost control completely and I forced myself on you."

"You didn't force me to do anything," she protested. "I wanted you too."

"Not at first."

"It didn't take me that long," she tried to tease him.

"No, it didn't and I'm glad," he smiled half-heartily. "I've asked myself the same question so many times ever since. Would I have stopped, if you had asked me to? Honestly, Scarlett, I don't know," he left a heavy sigh and dropped his eyes. "It scared the hell out of me, when I realized it. That I would have gone that far and hurt you so badly. As soon as you fell asleep, I run out of the house to get even drunker."

"You forced a kiss out of me and that's that. It wouldn't be the first time now, would it?"

"Nor the last I hope?"

"If you value your life!" she threatened playfully.

"I'm sorry, Scarlett," he said earnestly.

"I wouldn't be one bit sorry for that, if I were you. The way you treated me when you came back, that's a different story."

"I was still half crazy and I wanted to hurt you."

"So you went and sle–"

"No."

"No? But–"

"No, Scarlett. I didn't know how to face you, that's all."

"You lied to me?" she jumped up from his lap.

"Just like you, I did what I know best. Attack is the best defense, they say."

"At war!" she exclaimed.

"What do you call the last two years? A stroll in the park?" he laughed hoarsely.

"Am I to blame for that too?" she asked incredulously. "You started it."

"I started it?" he was on his feet bending over her.

"Yes, you did. And for the life of me, I still haven't fully understood why."

"Correct me if I'm wrong, my pet, but weren't you and Mr. Wilkes–"

"Ashley, Ashley, Ashley! Always Ashley!" she exaggerated. "Don't you ever think about anything else? He isn't responsible for all the misery in our marriage, you know!"

"Certainly not all," he smiled thinly, his eyes darkening. "I do, however, have a nagging suspicion that he set the wheels in motion after Bonnie was born."

"My mind was already made up before the visit to the mills," she stated matter-of-factly.

"Don't trifle with me, Scarlett," he warned in a low voice.

"For God's sake, Rhett! You know me my entire adult life. When have I ever wanted children willingly? I love them, but I didn't choose to have them. They were imposed to me and I had no saying in it. I thought with you it wouldn't be like that. You don't think like everyone else. You are different from any other man I know. But I was wrong. You too, like everyone else, chose for me, not with me. I hoped Bonnie would be my last. I hoped you of all people would understand."

"You said you have tired of me."

"Those were your words, not mine," she protested. "I only said I didn't want any more children. The rest were your assumptions."

He passed a hand through his hair in evident confusion.

"According to you, Ι should have done what?"

"Come now, Rhett. I don't stand a chance against your arguments. I never have. You could have talked me out of it. Instead, you dismissed me like you would an annoying fly. And just like that," she snapped her fingers in front of his face, "you moved on with your life without me."

"Are you saying you've regretted it?"

"Yes," she sighed.

"Yet for two years you did nothing to take it back."

"You've been treating me like a pariah these two years. I never knew you wanted me until that night."

"Fair point well made, my dear. Too fair, I'm embarrassed to admit," he laughed hoarsely. "It seems we've been at cross purposes, doesn't it?"

"But why, Rhett? We used to have so much fun, remember?"

"We still have fun," his eyes gleamed playfully.

"When one of the two is drunk to oblivion, you mean?" she teased.

"Surely not oblivion," he chuckled. "With significant memory gaps is more like it."

"You don't remember?" she breathed.

"Oh, I do remember," his arm was around her waist, his hand on her cheek. "The important parts, that is. I'll only need your help to fill in the details. Can you do that for me? It's such a shame not to know the full story of how our baby was conceived."

Without waiting for an answer, his body prompted her to walk. Backwards. Where the bed was. Picking up on it, she turned instantly crimson.

"What? Now?" she asked incredulously. "In broad daylight?"

"Now, honey," his breath caressed her skin, so close that he was. "When both participants are sober and consenting," the faintest hesitance in his gaze as he searched her face.

How to say 'no' to this? To his eyes feasting on her. To his arms already lifting her up. To his mouth kissing her. To his huge body leaning over her. When, in all her life, had she ever said 'no' to him once he had his mind set to it? So, she helped him remember in as much detail as possible. More than once, just to be on the safe side.

After all, repetition is the mother of learning.

There is one more chapter in this collection, one more crossroad that I have in mind. Which is still in my head and not a word on paper, I'm afraid. So I can't be sure when I will be able to complete it.

For the time being, I've done my part, please do yours and tell me what you think! :-) Until next time (Suellen's wedding in "Everything I do" will be posted within the week), take care! xxx