'I came back for you, Professor.'

Even now, two weeks later, the words haunted him.

They followed Severus around like a ghost, whispering in his ear like a lover's caress.

He heard them while he was watching the students dine in the Great Hall.

They sang to him while he filled out requests for supplies and funds to the Ministry.

Even when the world closed in and he took to the skies to clear his head, there she was: her face ablaze with anger and frustration and that nauseating Gryffindor passion that made him question his existence as a young adolescent.

'I came back for you.'

In his thirty-seven years no one had ever come back for him.

There was a time, too many moons ago, when he thought that maybe, just maybe, there was one other soul who had his back. A girl who smelled like sunshine and liquid luck, her smile so bright and infectious it nearly swallowed him whole.

But Severus Snape didn't deserve nice things. His earliest memories of mouldy blankets and an empty stomach reminded him that all good things were temporary, and it was only a matter of time before he would be by himself. Alone.

So he built a wall of insecurities and false realities, preferring books over conversation. He read stories of knights and princesses, but always felt disappointed when the shining soldier managed to defeat the powerful wizard. How could a mortal man win when wizards had magic.

Magic.

That was the name for the heaviness in his stomach. He learned the word at age six when he threw his father across the room with only his mind.

Magic made him strong. It was a secret power that belonged only to him, that no one could touch or take away. Magic couldn't be locked in a cupboard or chucked in the bin. It couldn't be stolen and sold for alcohol at the corner shop.

Magic made him different. It made him a target for all the other nasty children to tease and abuse just as primary schoolers do. Severus was not like the others, with his too-big shoes and stained shirt and his long hair which grew back every time his dad cut it. He didn't need one more thing to set him apart.

One day after he came home with a black eye, his mum opened up a dusty box she had hidden under the bed and showed him a stack of moving pictures. She told him about Hogwarts and it changed everything. There was a place for kids just like him with magic in their bellies where he didn't have to hide who he was.

Not long after Severus met her. His first real friend who harboured her own magic. His entire world orbited around her. Even when life was too loud and too real she was always there, waiting for him in the park with her autumn hair and her gentle laugh.

But happiness didn't exist for families like the Snapes, who lived in a derelict house at the end of a dirty street.

Severus quickly realised that his mother had fed him lies. Hogwarts was a school like any other, only the bullies were bigger and meaner and had the power to hurt him with things worse than fists. As he approached his teenage years, he found that the other students didn't like kids like him. They didn't like those who put their hands up in class and knew all the answers. They mocked his hair and his second-hand clothes and the size of his nose.

If the teasing was bad though, nothing was worse than losing her.

It was his fault. In the years that passed he could see now it has been his own doing that had driven an iron spike between them. He had destroyed the one good thing in his life. And then in an act of sheer stupidity he would never forgive himself for, he led her straight to her death.

His mother said he was young and vulnerable, but that didn't negate the pain and self-loathing that had grown inside him.

Severus drew deeper into himself. He let himself be used by those with more power, becoming a tool for their anger and their greed. He was their spy and their angel of death. During the first war he played Dumbledore's assassin, taking the jobs that no one else would because his soul was already damaged— what was one more life?

And then along came a girl with hair too big, who he ignored until one day she showed up in his office, begging for his help.

'I came back for you, Professor.'

'Professor?'

Severus blinked and glanced at the pale, sickly boy next to him.

'Are you alright, Professor?'

Severus brushed his hair back from his face and sucked in a lung-full of the brisk night air. 'Quite. It's you I'm worried about, Draco.'

'Oh.' Draco adjusted his cloak, favouring left arm as he did so. 'I'm fine.'

Severus gave him a pointed look. 'It doesn't take a Legilimens to work out that you're far from it.' He tapped his own right wrist. 'You should get that seen by Madam Pomfrey.'

Even in the dark, he could see Draco's cheeks tinge pink. 'It's just a sprain. I missed the vanishing step, that's all.'

Severus quickly lunged, grabbing the boy's arm. Draco yelped as Severus pushed back his sleeve, showing the dark purple and yellow bruises that extended up his forearm.

'You idiot. This isn't a sprain.'

Draco's face turned from pink to green. 'No shit,' he hissed through gritted teeth.

Severus fought the urge to smack the boy upside the head. 'You must stop antagonising the Gryffindors.' His fingers gently probed along Draco's arm, feeling for the break.

'You think I'd let them get away with it?'

Severus froze.

Shit.

He had been so wrapped up in Granger's return he had missed it entirely. Hadn't Lucius predicted that Draco's own return to Hogwarts wouldn't be treated lightly by the other Slytherins? Though Lucius was doing his best to claw his reputation back, the Malfoy's were no longer seen as the Dark Lord's favourites. Like sharks scenting blood in water, the Death Eaters could smell weakness.

'I don't need your pity,' Draco replied gruffly.

Severus said nothing, resuming his examination.

'I can handle it myself.'

'Clearly.' Severus sighed and pulled his wand from his sleeve. 'This will hurt. I'm not as proficient at mending bones as Pomfrey.' He slowly waved his wand over Draco's arm. 'Brackium Emendo.'

Draco grunted, but to his credit he didn't move a muscle. When the bruising had vanished, he raised his hand and inspected it. 'Lockheart tried that once. Vanished all of Potter's bones.'

'Lockheart was a pompous idiot,' Severus snorted, tucking his wand away.

They picked up their walk along the edge of the Forbidden Forest. Draco kicked at a stone and it bounced across the frosted grass.

'You need to deal with them. They won't respect you otherwise,' Severus commented.

Draco kicked at another rock. 'I know.'

'Draco–'

'I know, okay? You're worse than my father.'

He somehow doubted that, but kept silent.

'He won't answer any of my letters. I think he's actually disappointed in me.'

'If he's disappointed at least it means he cares,' Severus pointed out. 'You're a Death Eater. You don't belong here, trapped in a cage.'

Draco stopped. 'So you'd rather I was out there, torturing muggles?'

Severus groaned inwardly. 'Don't be a fool. But you can see where his frustration lies, can't you? From his perspective you should be out there, at the front of it all. Taking glory for your family name.'

Draco eyed the forest and shoved his hands inside the folds of his cloak. 'And do you agree with him?'

Severus followed Draco's gaze into the forest, his eyes playing tricks on him as the shadows wavered and shifted.

In some ways he was almost jealous of the boy. Draco had been born with a silver spoon in his mouth — he had wealth and the protection of his family's name. His mother cared about him deeply enough she would betray the Dark Lord and threaten another man's life to see her son succeed. And Lucius… well, Severus didn't doubt that Lucius would stop at nothing to protect his family.

Even with Lucius' misgivings and his own inability to kill Dumbledore, Draco was still young and intelligent, and it was no secret the Dark Lord saw his value. If only the boy put a little effort into it, he could easily have replaced his father's position at the Dark Lord's side. The power would have been intoxicating.

At that age, it was everything Severus ever wanted.

But now?

'I came back for you.'

Severus wasn't so sure anymore what he wanted.

Although Severus had promised himself to keep a closer eye on Draco, it was becoming increasingly more difficult to do as the weeks went by. There was an undercurrent of disruption among the students; particularly with those who were known friends of Potter's. Starting with Granger's outburst in Muggle Studies, the students had taken up the mantle and vowed to make life as difficult as possible for him and the Carrows.

It was so subtle at first that he almost missed it. It came from those he least expected - the quiet, studious ones who normally kept their heads down. The ones in fourth and fifth-year, who weren't particularly close to Potter but were old enough to understand what he could represent — something brighter and bigger than themselves.

They were disruptive in small ways with back handed comments and jibes. Girls snickering in the corridors, and boys giving pointed glances as he strode past them down the aisles in the Great Hall. It was worse during meals, when he was forced to sit in front of them all and try to hold some semblance of power while being very aware that the students were mocking him.

'It's only a bit of fun, Severus,' Minerva commented, her eyes sparkling over her teacup.

Severus slammed his goblet down on the table, spilling pumpkin juice all over his plate.

He strongly suspected the other professors were not subjected to the same torment as he and the Carrows had been. In fact, he wouldn't be surprised if they almost encouraged it in some ways.

'You're too soft on them,' Alecto complained at a staff meeting. 'You can't let them get away with such disrespect.'

'I don't have any problems in my classroom,' sniffed Pomona. 'Maybe the students aren't the problem.'

'You say they flooded your classroom? I certainly never taught them a spell like that,' Fillius added innocently.

'Severus, do something,' Amycus growled, ignoring their comments.

Severus folded his hands neatly on the table in front of him and regarded them all coolly.

'And what would you have me do? You already have permission to deduct points and give them detention. What more could you possibly want?'

Filch practically leapt out of his chair, jabbing his finger in Severus' direction. 'Whips and chains! Didn't I tell you, it's the only way to keep these brats in line. They can't be reasoned with.'

'Whips and chains?' Hagrid grunted. 'Dumbledore would be rollin' in his grave if he ever heard you was suggestin' such a thing.'

After that the staff room exploded into a shouting match that ended with Severus having to disarm Pomona and Alecto, less they attempt to blow each other up. The whole while Minerva stared at him in cool contempt.

They wouldn't use chains on students, he decided. But if he couldn't keep the students in line, he would be forced to come up with stricter measures for punishment. It would do no one any good if it got back to the Dark Lord that he couldn't control an unruly bunch of teenagers.

Which was why he was feeling particularly wary when Lucius Malfoy showed up at Hogwarts late one afternoon.

He was patrolling the halls while class was in session when the key around his neck grew cold, alerting him that someone had entered through the front gates. It was strange how the key had become part of him. He never took it off, and had grown used to its constant, heavy presence around his neck. He always found it slightly unsettling the way it almost spoke to the castle around them, warming or cooling depending on the message it needed to convey.

He grimaced and adjusted the chain, trying to pull it away from his chest as he hurried along the corridors towards the main entrance. His heart rate had picked up; although he knew it was unlikely the Dark Lord would ever visit him at Hogwarts, it was a possibility he always dreaded. Instead, he was greeted by the sight of a rather tall blonde in deep green robes in the Entrance Hall.

'Lucius,' he called, slowing his pace down as he descended the marble stairs. 'What a pleasant surprise. I wasn't aware you were coming today.'

Lucius gave him a pleasant smile that didn't quite reach his eyes, his cane tapping against the side of his boot. Severus noted that his robes still hung loosely off his broad shoulders, the dark smudges still evident under his eyes.

'New wand?' Severus asked, gesturing at the cane.

The smile vanished from Lucius' face, his lip curling in disgust as he stopped his tapping. 'Not yet,' he replied through gritted teeth.

Interesting. It had only taken Olivander three weeks to make Peter Pettigrew a new wand once the Dark Lord commanded it. In contrast, Lucius had had his wand removed nearly two months prior. And still he remained without one.

'I trust the journey here wasn't too arduous then?'

The muscle under Lucius' eye twitched. 'I travelled via side-along apparition. With Flint.'

'Ainsley? I thought he was still in hiding after he rejected the Dark Lord's offer.'

'He is,' Lucius answered. 'We've managed to recruit his son. I believe he was one of your students not too long ago.'

'Ah.'

Severus bit down on the inside of his cheek to stop himself from laughing. The idea of Lucius being forced to use side-along apparition with Marcus Flint of people was far too amusing. Having failed his N.E.W.T. exams the first time around, Flint wasn't exactly known for holding an intelligent conversation. It must drive Lucius mad.

It was in those brief moments which reminded him just how, at a young age, Severus found the Dark Lord so appealing. They shared a similar appetite for a cruel joke.

The thought of it made him queasy.

'So. To what do I owe the pleasure then?' He gestured towards the grand staircase. 'Shall we retire to my office? I know you're partial to a mid-day Firewhisky.'

Lucius tilted his chin up with a regal air his current state of appearance didn't quite match. 'I've been sent by the Dark Lord.'

Severus tried not to let the sudden wave of panic show. 'Indeed? Well, even more so, I suggest we move this conversation to somewhere more private.'

'That won't be required,' Lucius replied, absently rubbing at a smudge on the handle of his cane. 'It's not you I'm here for.'

He waited for a moment for Lucius to offer up further information, but when his attention remained on his cane, Severus ground his back molars together. 'Well? Care to share, or can I get on with my day?'

'Because being Headmaster must be so tiresome.' Lucius looked up, his head tilting to the side. 'Running around after children like some overgrown nursemaid.'

Severus' fingernail bit into the pad of his thumb. 'Teaching young minds isn't exactly an easy task.'

'But that's not exactly your job, is it Severus. Surely that's what you have the professors for. And I know you no longer have to attend meetings with the board of governors, so what is it, exactly, that you do.'

He was trying to get a rise from him. Lucius couldn't stand the thought that Severus was out there in the world with even a fraction more freedom than he was allowed.

But Severus was better than that, and he refused to rise to take the bait. 'I should ask you the same,' he replied nonchalantly. 'You must tell me, how is Peter Pettigrew these days? Did you know his animagus form is a rat? It suits him terribly well.'

Lucius' expression darkened. 'At least I can come and go as I please.'

'Can you though?' Severus casually slipped his wand out of his sleeve, his fingers trailing along its length. 'What good is being let out of the house if you can't even defend yourself?'

'If you're so high in the Dark Lord's rankings, then why are you here, Severus? You have no use as a spy anymore, and it's doubtful Potter would be stupid enough to try to sneak into Hogwarts. Why are you not out there, doing his work?'

Severus scoffed. 'And leave the school up to who, Notts?'

'It's not exactly difficult is it? Look at who he sent to aid you. The Carrows? Come now, we both know you could have done much better. The Dark Lord doesn't really care about education. What he does care about is keeping those he doesn't trust exactly where he wants them.'

Lucius took a step into Severus' space, peering down his nose at him. 'Don't think you're any better than the rest of us just because he's given you a fancy title like Headmaster. You're nothing but a pawn. And we all know pawn's are the first to go.'

Severus narrowed his eyes. 'Is that a threat?'

'A threat?' Lucius smirked. 'No. I'm just looking out for you, dear friend. As I always have.'

Severus scowled as Lucius turned and began to descend the stairs towards the dungeons.

'I'm afraid I can't let you into the Slytherin common room. Even to wait for Draco,' Severus explained, matching his steps with Lucius.

'Draco?' Lucius echoed, sounding as though for a second he had almost forgotten his son was at Hogwarts. 'No, I'm here to speak to Horace.'

Horace? What did the Dark Lord want with Horace Slughorn?

The man was more than adept at brewing Potions, nearly better than Severus himself. It was common knowledge that the Dark Lord had tried on multiple occasions to collect the old professor for one of his own, but everytime Slughorn refused. Slughorn was Slytherin through and through: he only played the game if the rules suited his best interests.

The Dark Lord had enough respect for Slughorn to leave him alone, but perhaps his number was finally being called.

Severus folded his hands behind his back, his wand still gripped tightly in his fist. If Slughorn wanted to change his mind then that was his prerogative. But if he said no…

'It's a shame you haven't decided to keep your offices down here,' Lucius sniffed as they descended through the cool dampness. 'You were always so well suited to dark, dingy places. Tiny little bolt holes where you could escape the rest of the world.' He cast Severus a wicked glance. 'You're right… Pettigrew is a rat. He told me all about his stay at that derelict little place you keep. Hidden among muggle squalor.'

Severus' breath hitched as his cheeks began to flame.

It was bad enough having the house that… creature in his home, but to hear that Pettigrew had been drip-feeding details of his personal life back to Lucius of all people?

Visions of murdering Pettigrew in cold blood flashed in red through his mind. He tightened his grip on his wand, a retort on the tip of his tongue when they rounded the corner to the potion labs and a figure sitting on the floor outside the seventh-year classroom.

Granger.

Her head snapped up at the sound of their approaching footsteps. Her posture went rigid and she pressed the textbook she was holding tightly against her chest, as though she had just been caught red-handed stealing from Filch's office.

There were over three hundred and fifty students at Hogwarts at that moment, and out of all of them it had to be Hermione fucking Granger sitting outside the Potions classroom.

'And what do we have here?' Lucius said, his voice dropping into a caress. 'The infamous Miss Granger. You gave Dolohov quite the run for his money on the train, I hear.'

Severus hated the way her name sounded on his lips.

Granger scrambled to gather her things. 'I'm sorry… I'll just—'

'No, don't go,' Lucius purred, leaning down to grab a hold of her textbook before she could pull away. The corner of his mouth twitched in amusement. 'Snooping outside the classroom. That's rather naughty, wouldn't you agree, Severus?'

She stood slowly, her gaze never leaving the textbook. 'I wasn't aware there was a rule saying I couldn't be down here.'

'No,' Severus agreed, 'but you've been forbidden to attend Potions lessons, and therefore have no reason to be anywhere near the dungeons. And based on the look of panic on your face at our arrival, I'm going to make the assumption you're up to something you shouldn't be.'

Granger licked her lips and began twisting the sleeve of her robe around her fingers.

She was nervous.

Far more nervous than a student who was potentially facing detention.

'I was just waiting for Ernie…' she stuttered. 'I wanted to speak to him about a question I had in Herbology.'

Lucius raised his eyebrows and glanced at the cover of her book. 'Herbology? Then why are you standing here with a N.E.W.T level textbook?'

She faltered. 'Well— you see— I—'

'If you're going to lie, at least make an attempt to do better than that, Miss Granger.' Severus muttered.

Lucius snorted, handing the textbook over to him. Granger's face paled and she made a grab for the book, but Severus held it high in the air.

'That's mine!' She shrieked.

Lucius laughed. 'That's cute. Will she stomp her foot in feminine outrage?'

He knew Granger's love for books bordered on obsessiveness, but it wasn't adding up. She was hiding something. He narrowed his eyes and flipped the book open.

His own writing stared back at him. It was his copy of Advanced Potion-Making.

He closed the book with a snap, swallowing against the raw feeling in his throat. 'Correction, this book is mine now. You no longer take Potions, so it shouldn't be an issue, should it.' She opened her mouth to object. 'Twenty points from Gryffindor for loitering. Get back to your common room where you belong.'

Granger the balls of her feet. 'But sir—'

'Now Miss Granger. I dislike having to repeat myself. Hurry up, or it'll be another twenty points.'

Looking as though she might burst from a panic attack, she hurried past them down the corridor.

'Has she been like this since she arrived at Hogwarts?' Lucius asked. 'She does appear to be a bit touched in the head, even for a Mudblood.'

Severus ignored the slur, tucking the small book into the interior pocket of his robes, where its weight pressed against his side.

Why the hell did Granger still have his textbook?

'Aside from blowing up Alecto's classroom during her first week, she's been smart enough to keep her head down,' Severus responded.

'Well then, good to hear the rumours aren't true.'

Severus frowned. 'What rumours?'

Lucius straightened the bow that kept his hair tied back from his face. 'That you've gone soft, of course. Amycus tells me that you can't keep the students in line. He says you refuse to do anything more than deduct points and force them to scrub bedpans.'

Severus instantly spotted the comment for what it was: a test.

It was true, the students were becoming more unruly by the day. As Headmaster, he was expected to keep them in line. But when detentions and points were no longer enough, and you were a servant of the Dark Lord…

It was clear now, the mistake he had made. He should have been stricter. The Dark Lord would be expecting it.

'I'll put Amycus in charge of punishment,' Severus told him airily, 'if he thinks he can do a better job.'

Lucius gave him an approving look as a wave of nausea made Severus weak in the knees.

The bells chimed the end of the period and the school came alive around them. Slughorn swung the door open and nearly jumped out of his skin to see them standing in the corridor.

'Headmaster, Lucius!'

Lucius straightened his robes 'Just the man I was hoping to see. Would you mind terribly if we spoke in your office? I shan't take up too much of your time.'

Slughorn looked as though he'd rather do anything but be alone with the elder Malfoy. 'Certainly, certainly… come in.'

Severus started to follow them inside when Lucius turned and stopped him with a smart smack on his chest with his cane. 'I'd like to speak with Horace alone, if you wouldn't mind.'

Severus' lip curled but nodded once. He watched them enter through the doorway at the back as the seventh-years began filing past.

'Why is my father here?' Draco asked quietly, sidling quietly up beside him.

Severus shook his head. 'I'm not sure.'

'Do you want me to find out?'

Severus stared blankly at him.

'You healed my arm,' Draco added, by way of explanation. 'I owe you.'

'I don't know what game you're playing—'

Draco held up his hands. 'Okay, okay. You don't have to get all testy about it… er… sir. It was just a suggestion.'

With a huff the boy slouched off down the corridor. Severus shook his hair forward, a shadow crossing his face. He glanced one last time at Slughorn's closed office door before heading back towards the upper floors.

'Professor Snape!'

Severus groaned and turned to find Ernie McMillan sprinting down the corridor towards him.

'No running in the halls, McMillan. As Head Boy you should know better than that,' Severus grunted.

McMillan pressed a hand to his chest, trying to catch his breath. 'Sorry, Headmaster. I saw you and Mr Malfoy standing out in the corridor. I just thought… you didn't see Hermione Granger waiting outside, did you?'

'No,' Severus lied.

McMillan looked crestfallen. 'Oh. Right. No, it was only… we were going to study in the library together. She offered to help me with my Charms homework.'

So she had been telling the truth after all.

'How noble of her,' Severus replied. 'Is there a reason you haven't asked Professor Flitwick? Or one of the other many students in your class, because last time I checked, Miss Granger doesn't attend Charms lessons.'

McMillan rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. 'Well, no. But… she's quite clever, isn't she? She's been helping a few of us out, actually. I don't think she minds, now that she's got a lot of free time… sir…'

Severus ground his teeth. He didn't want to know whether he wanted to throttle the girl or praise her for her ingenuity.

'Mr McMillan, be that as it may, I strongly suggest you keep your distance from Miss Granger,' he said, keeping his voice low. 'Miss Granger is friends with Potter, who is currently wanted by the Ministry of Magic. As our Head Boy, it would be most improper for you to be seen spending too much time around her. Do I make myself clear?'

McMillan's cheeks turned red. 'Right. Of course sir. If you'll excuse me, Headmaster…'

Left alone in the deserted corridor, Severus felt dizzy and cold. His vision swam in front of him and he longed to sit down and catch his breath somewhere quiet. He wanted to be alone.

Without meaning to, he found himself standing in the middle of his old office.

He hadn't been to the dungeon office since his first days back at Hogwarts. The destruction throughout the room was the same as it had been since his return.

Glass littered the floor, sparkling in the faint green glow from the underground lake windows. There was a heavy stench in the air where all the pickled creatures had been exposed and left to fester. The scrolls of unmarked essays had been crumpled on the floor, utterly destroyed by broken bottles of ink now staining the flagstone. Severus stopped to pick up his favourite quill, now broken at an angle.

The damage could have easily come from any one of his students, but from the scribbled note he had found on his desk and the way his books still lined the shelves, completely untouched, he knew without a doubt it had come from Granger.

He had deserved her rage.

The memory of her scream when he tore into her mind that night would forever remain with him.

Severus sighed and waved his wand, vanishing the glass and debris. He began organising the objects on his desk, setting them into neat piles. Righting his chair, he sat down, realising how much more comfortable the chair was in the Headmaster's office. His office.

But it wasn't really. As he looked out into the room, he realised that this was where he belonged. He stared at the empty chair across from his desk where Granger had spent all those hours, hanging onto his every word and for the first time since her return, he allowed himself to feel.

Lucius had asked him if there was someone at home waiting for him, and Severus had had the vivid vision of Granger sitting in his front room, reading. All summer the image kept him company, late at night after the revels and the raids when he drank to wipe away the memory of the screams silenced by his hands. He would press his palms into his eyes so hard it hurt, and picture her. The warm sunshine pouring through the cracked window, surrounded by his beloved books…

Merlin, he wanted it.

He hadn't wanted something that badly since he was a teen and it terrified him.

Severus had learned the hard way too many times over that nothing good could come from craving something. It only gave other ammunition to hurt you.

He wanted her to hate him. She should hate him.

And yet, despite it all, she had returned.

For him.

Isn't this what he wanted? Hadn't he carried some hope that by telling her about Dumbledore's premeditated death that some small part of her would understand that he wasn't the monster everyone made him out to be? That despite all of his acts, he still maintained some semblance of innocence?

Severus pulled his old Potions text out from inside his robes, his hand brushing against the key to Hogwarts. He placed the book down on his desk, opening the pages. He hadn't seen the book since Granger tried to use it as a bargaining chip, and then before that since his youth. He wasn't entirely sure how the book had come into her or Potter's possession in the first place.

The textbook was like a time capsule. His writing had changed over the years, more loopy and less cramped. He annotated sparingly these days, having perfected his system. The notes in the margins of his old Potions text made him smile with fondness. Even then, at the age of sixteen, he was far too clever for his own good.

A lot like a young girl — woman — he knew. How different would things have turned out, if only he had found friends like Potter and Weasley. Real friends, not like Lucius and Mulciber. Not people who used him. Maybe if only someone had stuck with him through those difficult, hormone driven years instead of abandoning him, he wouldn't be in this mess. He would have never meddled with Dark Magic, never fallen in with the wrong sort, and never found solace in a man who wanted to watch the world burn.

There was a piece of parchment tucked into the spine. He unfolded it carefully and a hard lump formed in his throat.

You can, because you must.

Severus slipped his hand back into his pocket and pulled out the worn note he had carried with him like a talisman. He placed them side by side, his writing next to hers. I lied for you. I gave up my friends for you, she had written before crossing them out.

What if she had come back to Hogwarts not on some mission to spy on him by the Order, but on her own accord.

She had turned her back on her friends once before, choosing to feed him information about Dumbledore's quest for the Horcruxes. True, she had done it in exchange for his aid in helping her parents. He could only assume she had done the deed and hidden them, which meant she no longer needed his help.

She had told him that if it were up to the Order, she would have never been allowed to return to Hogwarts. They wanted her out of sight, out of mind.

Why then? Why would she return? She hated him.

With a groan of frustration, Severus let his head fall back against his chair and stared up at the dark ceiling.

The worst part of it all was that if he let himself be honest, just for once, despite the fear he had been glad to see her in his office after the Feast. Seeing her there, knowing that there was one other person who had an inkling of the hell he was currently living… and then to hear her admit it…

It put them both in grave danger.

Author's Note:

Hullo all, Alice here.

I'm sorry about the leave of absence. Truth is, when I started this fic a year ago I wasn't expected to get the opportunity to go back to school to get my degree. On top of a job, kids, a life, it's meant that my brain has been at capacity and when I finally have moments to write, the writing is slow! I'm not giving up on this story, but bare with me over the next few weeks as I finish up my assignments for year one.

I love you all, thank you so much for all your continued love and support!

And next chapter? A heist ;)

Playlist:
Achilles Come Down, Gang of Youths
Fate of the Kingdoms, Ramin Djawadi (His scores are beautiful... I just... AHHH)
Time is Running Out, Muse