A/n: Hello if you're still reading this! It's that time of year again. Where I get especially inspired to write this story. Two days short of V-day, here we are. Happy consumer holiday by the way, lol. I've been poofing in and out of writing it feels like. I've had some big things going on that I'm working through, unfortunately. Please bear with me, I'll try to be more consistent. Happy reading!

xXx

He didn't mention it again. The L word. The word that made my throat dry and my heart beat like crazy. That I couldn't stop thinking about. I took a deep breath. Oh this was cheesy. I couldn't believe I was being so cliche and getting worked up over this. I hid my face in my arms. Even watching him prepare coffee was too much. The way he moved, the way he smelled, the way he tasted. All of it was driving me crazy. I had to be losing my mind. I made a vague noise of displeasure. Axel chuckled and the sound left me frozen. My whole body was tingling, hypersensitive to his every movement, waiting in silent anticipation.

Lanky fingers trailed my arm and I blushed as if on cue. I hated it. My heart went into overdrive just because he was touching me. We'd spent the whole weekend together. It had been absurdly wonderful. He made me feel so good, safe, protected. I actually didn't want to leave him on Monday but, as of now, that was the plan. Monday after class. I didn't have a lot of belongings, so it wouldn't take long to get settled in. Then I'd have some time by myself and to hopefully feel sorted. Reno had been working with his connections and had already gotten the apartment approved. Which was amazing. All I had to do was move in. I sighed miserably.

Yeah. Without a doubt. I had to be losing my mind. I should be rejoicing about moving into my own place. Not moping about leaving my boyfriend. Who I could see whenever I wanted to. Especially now that I had my own place and didn't have anyone to answer to. I sighed dramatically and Axel chuckled a bit. It sent my heart into a frenzy all over again. "What's wrong, baby?" he purred softly. He set down a cup of coffee in front of me, in offering, and I reluctantly lifted my head to gaze at it. He was so good. He knew exactly what to do to make me want him and to make me feel better.

"You told me not to think about it," I answered with a pout. He sat across from me, picking up his own cup of coffee and taking a sip. His lips curved up in satisfaction. I huffed quietly, begrudgingly sitting up to take a drink.

"Should we talk about it then, gorgeous?" he asked gently, gazing at me over his cup. My heart was jolting at the thought. Should we? I didn't know if I was ready or not, but it was driving me crazy at the same time. Our eyes met and I got lost in his gentle, reassuring gaze. "Whatever my feelings are, what matters to me is how you feel, Roxas." He looked like he meant it. Talking about it seemed harmless enough. Still, I took another minute to be reluctant. His gaze gentled and those gorgeous emerald eyes did me in. With another sigh, I sat up. I took a fortifying drink of delicious coffee and thought for a moment as I gazed into my cup.

"Your feelings matter too," I muttered, blushing. He smiled at me, his whole face softening and his endearing gaze meeting mine.

"I think that what we have right now is perfect, don't you?" He tipped his head thoughtfully when I didn't answer. "Love is vulnerable and messy but beautiful. It's definitely something I want to do with you," he murmured with that small smile, "I hope one day you'll feel the same but, seriously, don't feel pressured about it," he told me with a shrug. My stupid heart was pounding again and I chuckled breathlessly. If this was how I felt now, I didn't even want to imagine how much it would suck when we eventually ended up hurting each other. It was bound to happen. Inevitable, really. Life wasn't like some cheesy romance movie and I already knew that I was going to be a shitty boyfriend. Just as I was about to tell him so, my heart jolted instead. Axel set down his coffee and slid beside me, trapping me gently. He was gazing at me seriously and I was completely melting under his stare. If only I could actually melt into a puddle of goo and escape but… that wasn't a possibility. He wasn't going to let me get away from him right now. Axel knew about my skepticism to love, there was no doubt about it. He was too good at reading me. Whatever he was about to say, he wasn't going to change my mind. I gasped softly, surprised when he gently tugged me closer, cupping my face and steadying me instead, murmuring my name. Then lanky fingers slid into my hair, tugging gently. As he did this, he pulled me into a kiss. My head was spinning by the time he pulled back to breathe, "I won't hurt you. 'Kay?"

"What if I hurt you?" His other hand rose to my face and nimble fingers gently brushed my hair out of my face, gently gliding across the skin in a feathery caress. I gasped softly as he kissed me again. Unlike his gentle touches, it was hot and heady. I couldn't seem to catch my breath. Then, he did it all over again. I stared into his eyes. He was so gorgeous.

"Then I'll take you the fuck to my bedroom until we figure it out," he promised. I moaned helplessly and he set about exploring my mouth deeply. Hands slid up my shirt, touching the previously unavailable skin. My back pressed against the wooden bench as he bridged over me. My head was spinning, so I turned away sharply and gasped,

"You're keeping me, no matter what?" before laughing incredulously.

"That's right," he purred into my ear. I stared at him speechlessly. He grinned at me in satisfaction. I gasped when he pulled me up onto his lap and gazed into my eyes seriously. I blushed darkly, staring into beautiful green eyes. My legs were straddling his hips and I was keenly aware of how quickly he could demonstrate his promise. It turned me on like crazy and I was trembling as he pulled me closer, asking, "Any objections?" Axel was absolutely confident that I didn't have any. I felt my face heat up further.

"What, you're serious?" Axel pretended to mull it over, smiling despite himself and ruining the illusion of being serious.

"Yeah," he purred, "you're mine. Got it memorized?" I bit my lower lip and he sighed softly. My heart pounded as the soft exhalation teased my lips. Then he brushed our noses and lent back in to whisper, "I'll keep kissing you 'til you answer me." With a touch of amusement, he added, "Who knows, maybe you'll be writhing against me, begging for more, before you can." Then his lips were pressed to mine. He pulled me closer and I moaned into his mouth. Our bodies pressed flush together and I melted into him. I wrapped my arms and legs around him, getting comfortable as I kissed him back. It felt so good, a slow, steady burn. His large, hot hands set about exploring, caressing pleasurably before unzipping my sweatshirt. I felt a rush of arousal and pulled back. He could very effortlessly make me lose my clothes. Very quickly.

"Okay, okay," I gasped breathlessly, lifting my hands in mock surrender, "I'm yours." He was still dangerously close. Axel chuckled a bit and kissed me sweetly. I wrapped my arms around him tentatively. When he backed off, I found myself tugging him closer, unable to stop myself. Kissing him and touching him felt so good. His tongue tangled with mine. He didn't let me go, content to follow my lead. I didn't even think about letting him until there was knocking on the front door. Even then, he was reluctant to pull away.

"Mmm, I bet that's Demyx," he murmured into my neck. His voice was low and husky and sexy as hell, "still up for company?" I nodded reluctantly, not trusting my own. I'd almost forgotten. While Demyx as still in town, he was going to come over and have breakfast with us. Possibly his husband too. I was regretting that decision right now. "But first…" he murmured, thoughtfully and I glanced at him questioningly, only to realize he'd caught me looking disappointed. He watched me appreciatively, happy that I was tolerating his guests right now. My breath caught as he kissed me deeply and my eyes slid shut. He was only satisfied to pull back when I moaned into his mouth. His lips trailed my cheek, settling very intentionally to press to the spot where my ear met my jaw and whispering, "Thank you, baby. I promise to make it up to you." I shuddered and he guided me to settle down beside him. I was still breathing heavily and unable to think of a single thing to say as I watched him straighten his clothes and pull away. He glanced back at me with a smile before disappearing through the doorway. Axel was so gorgeous and he was mine. I was flustered just thinking about it, so I drank my coffee, trying to distract myself from the fact that kissing him was ridiculously addictive because I really needed to pull myself together. I was doing a pretty good job of settling back down to normal until he opened the front door. I poked my head into the hallway, concerned by the commotion.

"Woah, woah, woah, Kairi, Sora, just a minute."

My eyes widened and I felt the color drain from my face. They were actually trying to hunt me down now. Gross. At least Axel was doing a good job of keeping the door mostly closed.

"Axel! Is Roxas here?!" My brother was freaking out. Completely freaking out. Great. Going to class was going to be so much fun. I clenched my jaw and tried not to groan miserably, wishing I could be invisible right now.

"I have friends coming over," he told them gently, "you'll have to come back later and then we can talk about it. I'll check in with Roxas, 'kay?" I ducked back into the kitchen, not wanting to take any chances of being seen, even if I couldn't hear what they were saying anymore. I fidgeted with my zipper anxiously as I paced. I closed my eyes, freaking out. I tried to focus on remembering how protective he had been of me. He wouldn't let me down. I took a deep breath, sighing and slumped back down into my seat. When he came back, he gave me a small, reassuring smile.

"I'm so sorry," I muttered as he went about the room, drawing the curtains. Completely and utterly mortified. He shrugged, taking the time to get us more coffee before he settled down beside me, perfectly unbothered.

"There's nothing to be sorry for, baby," he told me gently. "It was bound to happen since you moved out. I told them that they need to text me before coming here, if they're going to and that they need to calm down before talking to you." He smiled a bit. "That should make it safer if you need to come by." I laughed a little, still feeling painfully anxious.

"Yeah… maybe. Thanks." He pressed his lips to the top of my head. My heart was racing as I gazed up at him affectionately. He caught me, his expression softening as he smiled. My heart stuttered as he closed the space between us once more. I got lost in the feeling of kissing him.

"Feel better?" he murmured. I thought about it for a moment. I actually did and I nodded in relief. He gently wrapped his arm around me and I realized just how calming it was. I took a drink of coffee, and lent against him. It was really nice. His fingers were gently trailing my skin. My disappointment came back with a vengeance when we were interrupted again.

This time was slightly better. Demyx had brought doughnuts from the local bakery. I had to admit, it made me like Axel's quirky blond friend that much more. I had a feeling that most of them would be like this. If Reno was any kind of indication. "I brought your favorites, Axe!" He was so happy and bubbly. He grinned enthusiastically when he saw me. The high energy still reminded me of Sora, but at least Demyx wasn't so cringey. "Roxas! I'm so happy to see you again!" I nodded as he set down the box but squeaked in surprise when he pulled me into a hug. I wasn't sure that I liked how touchy feely he was but I tolerated it. Axel was overly touchy too. Except I liked it from Axel, who was laughing at my murderous scowl.

"Better let him go, Demyx," he teased. I huffed and the blond took a moment to get a good look at me. He laughed cutely.

"Awww he's so adorable, Axel!" I glared at the blond and he giggled.

"Like a feral cat," someone commented dryly. Demyx's mouth dropped open just before I turned my glare to the doorway. There was a shorter man with slate hair frowning deeply at us and holding iced coffees. I was betting he was the husband I'd heard about.

"Zexion!" Yep. I batted at Demyx, blushing deeply and returning the slate haired man's scoff. His offering of delicious sustenance did not sway me. I could already tell. We were destined to dislike each other. I glared at him openly and Zexion rolled his eyes. At least he wasn't stupid enough to ignore my disdain for him. Husband of Axel's friend or not, I wasn't going to go out of my way to force myself to like him.

"Let him go before he attacks you," the man chided his husband. I was caught between feeling relieved and offended when Demyx let me go. It wasn't enough to give him a point of favor. The blond put his hands on his hips and scolded,

"That's not very nice!" Zexion rolled his shoulders. He gazed at Axel for a moment before asking,

"Do you need pointers on how to tame your boyfriend?" Axel snorted and wrapped an arm around me, tugging me to his side.

"Maybe a laser pointer or some catnip," I suggested sarcastically. Axel laughed and the pleasant sound left me feeling less pissed off. Damn it.

"I personally like how feisty Roxas is. I wouldn't change anything about him," he answered. My frown deepened but his endearing smile was making me feel calmer. So was the gentle body heat that was radiating into me. His wry smile was lighting those gorgeous green eyes and I huffed offendedly. "Be nice to Roxas, Zexion," he murmured before chuckling as he purred in my ear, "be nice, kitty." I resisted the urge to hiss, scoffing at him before fwicking my head away in irritation.

Demyx laughed awkwardly before saying, "So Roxas, let me steal you for a minute!" I hardly realized what he was doing as he whisked me into the living room, swiping two coffees and the doughnuts as he did until we were settled on the couch.

"Uhh…?" I questioned, not sure of what to say. Demyx seemed pretty cool at least. I didn't want Axel's friends to hate me so… I sighed, resigning myself to being nice and contemplating how to repay Axel for calling me a cat. I scoffed again. Actually it was more Zexion's fault.

"Oh well Zexion can be like that sometimes. Thought I'd get you outta there!" I nodded slowly, sipping at my coffee but not really knowing what to say. I choked a bit when he decided to even more awkwardly break our awkward silence.

"Soooo, Axel might have mentioned you're struggling with your sexuality." When I finally managed stop choking on my coffee, I hummed softly, deciding to take my time eating an extremely delicious doughnut instead. I contemplated talking about it. I imagined it had come up since my friends had been so cringey about it. And at least Demyx wasn't being annoying about it. "If you feel like sharing, I might be able to relate. Mine's kinda weird too." I tipped my head at him contemplatively. He actually looked like he was trying to be helpful.

"Well, uhh, I like green eyes, I think they're gorgeous. That's something I'm really attracted to. They make me weak but otherwise I usually have a more detached sense of attraction for other people." I chewed over my next thought before reluctantly adding, "I think Axel's pretty hot… but... I kept him at arm's length until we got to know each other a little better. I don't look at someone and want to have sex. I don't really get it when other people talk about someone's hotness and wanting to go sleep with them. I don't get crushes and I am pretty generally adverse to the idea of relationships and love. But if I get a connection with someone its different, I guess." Demyx smiled a bit.

"You're demi," he murmured. I gazed at him as if he'd sprouted another head. "You're demisexual." My heart was racing as I asked,

"What?" Was he seriously putting a label on one of my biggest life struggles so easily?

"You might be attracted to people aesthetically sometimes, but in order to have the desire to be sexual with them, you need to have a strong emotional connection first." His lips quirked up and he grinned at me, "Right?" I stared for a whole minute. Holy shit. He winked and told me, "Me too. I always end up falling hard for my closest friends but usually I don't have much desire at all. I'm sapiosexual too, attracted to intelligence, but mostly we're in the asexual spectrum. Who you're attracted to is a different part of it. That's where homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual, pansexual come in." I nodded slowly, it was really confusing and overwhelming to be honest. He sighed affectionately. "My hubby's a total smartie pants and my best friend. I'm pansexual and demisexual because I'm attracted to people regardless of gender and identity. You're at least homosexual since you're attracted to Axel but don't freak out about it, you've got plenty of time to discover yourself. Hopefully pressure free, now that you've moved out," he told me with a wink. I smiled a little bit and let myself think about Axel. Maybe that's why my connection to him was so intense. I was attracted to him but what really got me was who he was as a person. Maybe I was attracted to guys too. Maybe I was mostly adverse. Normally the idea of random hook-ups with a stranger made me want to vomit. It was so gross... but Axel had been different. Demyx hummed softly in affirmation, "Careful when you finally fall in love, those are the worst ones to get over. Personally, when I'm in love that's when I can't get enough of my partner. Especially sexually." I nodded in appreciation.

"I haven't liked anyone like this before, personality is huge for me but I've never fallen for looks too," I admitted. And yeah, the sex was good and intense but I wasn't going to get into that. I smiled at him wryly. So, there was a name for my crazy sexuality after all, huh? I'd honestly felt really alone. It was so foreign, like I was from another planet altogether. "Thanks, Demyx." The blond nodded with a smile.

"I'm happy to help!" I paused to consider for a minute before finally venturing to ask.

"Do you… want to maybe be friends? I don't really know a lot of people around here and…" Oh boy he was beaming again. I hoped I wasn't about to regret this.

"Yeah I'd like that. Maybe Zexion will come around too," he said with a grin and a wink. He laughed at the look on my face that said definitely not. "You really don't have a filter you know? Especially on your face. But I like that about you." I rolled my eyes and smiled a bit.

"Flattery will get you nowhere. You'll need a lot more coffee at least to win me over," I promised, making his eyes glitter in excitement.

"I know just the place to pick up some more gigs then," he answered without missing a beat. "Free coffee comes with the job." I smiled despite myself.

"I'd be down for listening to a decent band too," I murmured back.

"With your sexy boyfriend?" Demyx teased. "I could pick up a daytime shift, you guys could have a nice date with free coffee on me." I blushed but my smile widened. That actually sounded enticing. My skin prickled when the couch dipped down beside me. I could smell sea-salt, before Axel spoke.

"You're smiling," he observed. I hummed softly, distracted by and insanely jealous of the candy in Axel's mouth. Demyx giggled a bit, watching my eyes flutter and my expression melt before excusing himself. Axel wrapped his arms around me and I lent into him.

"Demyx thinks I'm demisexual. It makes me feel better to have a name for it." Axel hummed thoughtfully, his hand covering mine as he laced our fingers together.

"Good," he purred with a soft smile. I tipped my head up, getting lost in emerald green.

"What about you?"

"Me? I'm dangerously attracted to every last bit of you, that's enough for me," he answered before resting his chin on top of my head. My heart was racing. "Is that okay?" I melted into him.

"Yeah," I told him helplessly. Lips pressed to the top of my head gently and I let my eyes slide shut. It didn't even make me anxious to have his friends here while he was being so affectionate. It was nice actually, that they were so warm and supportive. Even Zexion wasn't being weird and I didn't really know him. Or like him.

Axel's warm hands trailed my skin in gentle caresses. It was so relaxing that I was actually dosing off, not realizing it until I heard an increasingly familiar giggle. Demyx. "Aww looks like he's taking a cat nap Axe."

"I hear cats like warmth," he answered teasingly, trailing his fingers along my skin in soothing motions. I huffed half-heartedly.

"Not my fault you're insanely warm," I muttered sleepily before peeking at him. "I'm not a cat." He was smiling at me endearingly.

"You act like one so much, it's adorable. Just like you say I'm a portable heater." I pouted at him before sighing,

"Fine." Axel looked pleasantly surprised and somewhat amused that I was consenting to this. I closed my eyes and got comfortable again as he resumed his gentle caresses and talked quietly with his friends. It was actually pretty relaxing and the lack of expectation to socialize was really nice. I didn't realize that I had actually fallen asleep on Axel until I woke up in his bed. I shifted but froze when lips pressed to the back of my neck tenderly. Axel's arms were around me and he hugged me closer, pressing me into his firm body. It felt so nice. I belatedly also realized that our legs were linked together.

"Hey beautiful," he breathed into my ear, "did you sleep well?" I nodded tiredly.

"Did your friends go home?" Axel hummed in affirmation.

"You have me all to yourself," he purred softly. I smiled a bit as he continued to kiss me. "What are you going to do with me?" I settled in against him.

"This is really nice, actually." He smiled against my skin, the next kisses lingering longer as I keened into him. "I'm going to miss you tomorrow," I admitted. Axel paused before propping himself up to gaze down at me and pushing me onto my back. He looked so serious but so gentle.

"Roxas I…" he sighed and gave me a helpless smile, "I don't want you to go, to be honest." I reached up, letting my fingers glide into soft red hair.

"Maybe you could stay with me tomorrow," I suggested, feeling hopeful. Axel smiled at me warmly.

"I'd like that." Then he closed the space between us and I found myself lost in a gentle kiss.

"Mmm, its a date," I murmured back. Chuckling he purred back,

"I'm looking forward to it."

xXx