Chapter 23

The door had barely closed when Lester turned on me, "Vince is dating Lula?" he asked, sounding completely astounded.

"No," I said. "He's helping Vinnie while I'm supposedly helping Ranger get Rafael. He accidentally ruined one of her shoes and he bought a new pair for her. The thing was, Lula's shoes came from a trunk sale and Vince replaced them with the real deal. His sister got them for him. I guess she sells high end shoes."

"She does," Lester agreed. "I scored some Lucchese's because she used her discount for me. Diego wore them in Mexico."

"I wish you wouldn't talk about yourself in the third person," I said. "It's creepy."

"Truth be told, Diego's kind of creepy," Lester said. "How about you get me another beer before I hit the road."

I got one for me, too. It was a two-beer kind of night. We sat and drank mostly in silence, but it was comfortable. When his bottle was empty, he set it on the end table and came across the room toward me. He reached out a hand and I took it, letting him pull me to my feet.

"I'd better be going," he said. "Before I go though, I'd like to ask you a question. Will you give me a straight answer?"

"I will if I can," I answered hesitantly. I had a feeling he was going to ask about Rafael. He knew, from his recent trip to Mexico, exactly what kind of man Rafael was.

He was surprisingly tender when he hugged me and asked in a soft voice, "Did he hurt you, Beautiful?"

I drew in a slow, deep breath and pulled back to meet his gaze. "He did," I confessed, "but I'm not going to let him hurt me anymore." My voice was a little wavery, but my resolve was rock solid.

Apparently, Lester's resolve was as well. He leaned forward and kissed me on the forehead. "He'll pay. You can count on it. He'll pay for what he did to Ella and Louis' son, and he'll pay for what he did to you."

His tenderness was my undoing. Tears rolled down my cheeks and as much as I tried to control it, a sob broke loose. He gathered me into his arms and held me, running his hands gently up and down my back.

We stayed like that for a while. Lester was being a gentleman and letting me get my breathing and tears under control before he let go of me. We were still standing close when I heard the locks tumble. My instinct was to pull away, but Lester tightened his hold on me. I knew it was Ranger. Joe used to have keys to my place, but he'd returned them. I didn't know if Ranger had keys or not, because he had no need of them.

Lester knew it was Ranger, too. Without turning around, he said, "About time you got here, boss man. This brave girl doesn't need to be alone tonight." He kissed me once again on my forehead, turned and gave Ranger a casual salute before he walked from my apartment.

Ranger came to me and brushed my curls off my forehead. He stopped short of wiping away Lester's kiss, but I sensed he wanted to and I twitched my lips into a small smile. He gave me a questioning look.

"I'm good," I told him. "Lester was so kind it just triggered something in me and before I knew it, I was crying. It's not what it looked like with him," I said.

"It was exactly what it looked like," Ranger replied. "One friend comforting another. You picked wisely, Babe. Lester and Vince will take care of things."

"What do you mean? Do you have the plan detailed?" I asked.

"I do, tentatively. When the team is together tomorrow, we'll go over it and see what everyone else comes up with. Was it hard for you to tell Lester and Vince?"

"Not as hard as it was to tell you," I said. "Maybe I'm getting used to it. And, well, I didn't go into quite as much detail as I did with you, but they got the picture."

"And you think Vince and Lester will be okay working together?" Ranger asked.

"I do."

I realized that we were standing in the middle of my living room. "Sit down," I said. "I've got a beer left. I'll get it for you."

"No need," Ranger said. "I had Tank drop me off here so I could ride back to RangeMan with you."

"We're going back to RangeMan?" I asked.

"You've been staying with me," Ranger said. "I thought the arrangement would continue."

"I thought I was staying there because you were trying to keep me from having to deal with Rafael. Now that I have a meeting with him, I doubt if he'll try to stop by."

"I did want to keep you inaccessible to Rafael, but I thought, or hoped you were staying for another reason. Aren't we working on being a couple?"

"What does that even mean, Ranger? A couple. Are we dating? Are we booty call buddies, or friends with benefits? I need some clarification."

Ranger walked me toward the sofa where he sat and pulled me down on his lap. "I'll give you clarification," he said. He kissed me and one kiss led to two, but before I could initiate number three, he pulled back.

"I don't have much couple experience," he said. "Unless you count Rachel, and we were only a couple until Julie made three and then things fell apart. I want you in my life with more regularity than you've previously been, and I don't plan on sharing you with anyone."

"Is that a reference to Morelli?" I asked.

"Partly. When Morelli was part of your day-to-day existence, I had to accept that and take whatever you had left over. It was my fault you were with Morelli after all."

"Your fault? How could that be."

"I knew I wanted you from the day we met, back when you and Morelli were enemies. I didn't act on it because my life was chaotic. I sat back and watched your relationship with Morelli change from adversarial to friendly. I knew when you walked into the bonds office the morning after you first slept with him I had made a big mistake."

"That's kind of insulting," I said. "You make it sound like I had no say in the matter…that you let Morelli and me happen. It would have happened no matter what. It was inevitable. I'd had unresolved feelings for Morelli for a long time."

"You had feelings for me," Ranger said. "But you were afraid. I didn't fit into the Burg boyfriend mold. I saw that, too. As much as you protested about the trivialities of Burg life, it was important to you. I decided not to move forward with what I wanted, because you weren't ready for it. When we made love for the first time, you still weren't ready and I knew I'd made another mistake."

My shock must have shown on my face. Ranger thought sleeping with me had been a mistake, and that hurt. He saw and understood my dismay.

"It was a mistake because up to that point I only wondered how good it would be between us," he said. "We made love and then I knew, and I also knew it wasn't going to happen again. You weren't ready. I didn't think you'd ever be ready, and I was going to have to spend the rest of my life knowing what I was missing."

I was speechless. Ranger was talking in a way that I'd never before heard him talk. He was talking about feelings.

"A year ago I told myself that if you and Morelli broke it off, I'd move on you."

"But you didn't!" I protested. "I broke up with Joe for good and you knew it, but you only called me when you needed something, and we didn't, I mean, there was nothing like that between us."

"You broke it off and then always went back. How was I to know this one was different?"

"That's fair, I guess. But it has been off for months and it never lasted months before, and he's dating, a lot."

"Babe, you're the only one who didn't know he dated a lot when you were together."

I shot him a dirty look, because…truth hurt. "Well, now he's dating a nun, or an ex-nun, and I think they're serious and I'm happy for him. He and I are history. And now that I know my mother's history with the Morelli family, well let's just say that was the final nail in the coffin. I didn't want you to bring him in on this…I'm that done with him."

"I know you are," Ranger said. "That's why I said I wanted to work on being a couple. On being in a committed relationship. I told you once my life didn't lend itself to relationships. I've been trying to change that. I've been spending more time with my family and trying to delegate my responsibilities to the core team at work. I'm trying to make myself more available for personal relationships."

I thought for a moment about the gray Macan and the jeans and Henley he'd worn when we went to his uncle's restaurant. I remembered his quiet warning that he tried hard to keep RangeMan out of his family time. Is this what he meant by saying he was trying to make himself more available for relationships. And then I remembered the night I'd watched the videotape of myself leaving Rafael's office.

"That sounds good, Ranger, but it's a load of hooey!"

"Babe?"

"When you called and told me you needed me to watch a video, it wasn't because you wanted a relationship, because you thought I was finally ready. You wanted to romance me out of my pants to get information. You were using me!"

"It is true, when you were in my apartment for the first time in a very long time, I wanted you out of your pants, but I wasn't using you. I was using the situation as an excuse to restart what I'd hoped would be something lasting. I still hope that."

"And the morning after?" I questioned. "You weren't exactly hospitable. You treated me like a hook-up who once I'd served my purpose needed to get the heck out of Dodge."

I was heartened to see Ranger's eyes widen in shock.

"I didn't" he said.

"You did." I returned. "And what was I to think other than you'd romanced me in order to get information you wanted on Rafael and when you didn't get it, it was 'Sayonara Stephanie!'"

Ranger shook his head as if to negate what I was saying. "Babe, I own and run a multi-faceted business where I am known for my authority. I am the boss. People pay attention to me and do what I say. I don't lose my temper or show emotion. I am in control and in charge. And yet when you're around, I have no control. I can't stay away from you. I told you once, I have the muscle, but you have the power and it's true. More so today than it was the first time I said it."

"And this is pertinent to the conversation because…"

"Because I had no intention of sleeping with you that night, but every time I'm around you I end up with a damnable raging hard on and once you were there my resolve slipped. I no longer wanted only information from you. I wanted you to stay for reasons that had nothing to do with Rafael Acosta."

He was frowning but it wasn't anger. It was concern. He was reliving that night in his mind. I believed what he'd said but it still didn't explain the morning after.

"I can buy that," I said. "But why were you so mean the next morning?"

"I wasn't."

"You were," I insisted.

He sighed and tightened his arms around me. He was quiet for a moment and once again I knew he was remembering that night.

"You're right," he said. "I was out of line. When I realized it was you on the tape I was filled with rage at the thought he'd had his hands on you, and that was before I knew the extent of what had happened. I was angry that you wouldn't share the whole truth with me. That was atypical for you."

"You didn't tell me the whole story at first either, so I should have been just as upset as you."

"You're right again," he said. "I didn't tell you everything. I felt as though what I'd hoped was going to be a lead to getting Rafael had turned out to be another dead end, and I was feeling the pressure to get him—and you were just as upset as I was. I was prepared to take you home and run with you. You're the one who decided you had to go."

He had a point, albeit a very small point. I did lose my temper, but it wouldn't have happened if he'd treated me like a lover instead of an inconvenience.

"I'm a work in progress when it comes to relationships, Babe. I'm not used to sharing my feelings, but I'm learning. I didn't mean to hurt you that morning. My behavior was wrong. I'm sorry. Forgive me?"

"Yes," I thought he was sincere, and I sensed his true regret but I wasn't sure I was completely over it. He apparently decided that was enough talking and chose a different method of convincing me he was sorry.

He laced his fingers through my hair on either side of my head and pulled my mouth toward his. This kiss was soft and lingering, until it wasn't. It morphed into a very serious kiss, followed by many more serious kisses.

Finally, he moved his mouth from mine and said, "I don't want you in my apartment to keep you safe from Acosta. I want you there because I'm there. I want to be with you and I'm staying here tonight unless you tell me to go. Do you want me to go?"

"No."

He stood, slowly sliding me off his lap, and then picked me up effortlessly and began walking toward my bedroom. "I don't know what a relationship between us looks like, Babe. I know I want this with you, but I'm never sure of the next step. I don't know where we're going in the future, but I do know that it will be where we both decide we want to go. That's all I can say now." It turned out that was exactly the right thing to say.

It was past three when I turned over to look at the bedside clock.

"You okay, Babe?" Ranger asked. His voice was husky with sleep, but I could hear his concern.

"I'm okay," I said. "I'm just thinking about how this thing is going to come down."

"Go back to sleep and be ready for the meeting. That's when we'll figure out how things will go down."

"Easier said than done," I replied. "Did you tell Morelli? Was he angry with me?"

That question roused Ranger and he pulled me back toward him. "He was not angry with you. Why would you think so? You did nothing wrong. He was concerned, and glad we finally have a chance to get Acosta. His first response was to let the police act on it, but he knows we need a confession. He's working with us." He pulled me in close to him and I relaxed and eventually went back to sleep.

I awoke the next morning alone in my bed. Ranger had left earlier. He took the Macan and said he'd send someone to get me before the planning session at 11:00. I reminded him that I had a perfectly functional car sitting in my parking lot and that I could drive myself to RangeMan. He left me with a kiss and a smile and a tug on my wildly corkscrewing curls, and in that moment my early morning plan solidified.

I had Mr. Alexander's private number in my phone. He'd given it to me after the third hair emergency so I could contact him directly. It was still very early so I'd wait another half hour before I called.

Tomorrow night I was meeting face-to-face with Rafael and I planned to be ready physically, mentally and emotionally. I knew Ranger was worried. He had agreed to help me, to let me be the one to bring Rafael down, but he knew more than anyone the range of emotional highs and lows I'd been through in the last few days. I needed to be strong, for him, for me and for Louis and Ella, and he wasn't sure how strong I was. I felt bad for him. I was his only option and for that reason more than for myself, I would be strong and I would make a success of getting Rafael to confess to David Guzman's murder.

I'd need all the weaponry I could muster. Physically I was in good shape thanks to my running regimen. Mentally I was capable. I didn't have the details yet and wouldn't until after the meeting, but I'd be ready to play whatever role was necessary to achieve the goal. Emotionally I was a little all over the place, but looking like I was in control and ready to kick ass could go a long way towards achieving that goal as well.

I hopped out of bed, enjoying the slight muscle soreness and the memory of what caused it. I showered and put a fresh coat of polish on my fingernails and toenails. While the polish was drying, I called Mr. Alexander. He was so relieved to find out I hadn't singed my hair beyond repair or didn't have a tangled mess of foreign substance to remove that he agreed to an early start to his day and worked me in as his first customer.

When I returned home from his salon I had only an hour to finish getting ready and make it to RangeMan, but I wasted no time. I pulled on a form-fitting black long-sleeved shirt and paired it with slim fitting black pants and black ankle boots. I spent more time than usual with my makeup and the result was pleasing. My hair had been tamed from a fuzzy mass of mess to restrained layers of casual and sexy waves. I looked darn good. I looked calm, capable and kick-ass. A woman who was in control, physically, mentally and emotionally.

My appearance was, in essence, a dress rehearsal for how I planned to appear when I went to Rafael's for my command performance. When I walked into the RangeMan conference room exactly at 11:00 I judged the success of my transformation by the full 200-watt smile that quickly flashed and was gone before he began to get down to business. Ranger understood the reason behind my enhanced appearance and it pleased him. That pleased me.