All'S NOT FAIR IN LOVE
Chapter 8 - The Outcome
Kate arrives at the ME lab minutes before Lanie. When Lanie arrives she opens the door to her lab and has Kate undress and wear a lab gown. Lanie does all the physical exams, collecting samples for tests, and then has Kate change back to her street clothes. Lanie takes Kate's clothes from that last night and tests them for any evidence. Having completed her forensic examinations, Lanie and Kate now must wait for results. Lanie brings Kate to her office where she makes her a cup of coffee and has her wait on one of her guest office chairs.
"I've run tests for these samples from you and your clothes, but the results may take a while", she tells Kate, "so wait here, there's more coffee in the pot. Snacks are in the bottom desk drawer if you need to eat, otherwise we will have to wait for about two hours. Let me unlock my computer so if you get bored you can get online for some diversion. If you want to shower, use my bathroom, all the toiletries are there for your use."
Lanie goes to see the progress of the tests on the samples she took from Kate. Kate decides to shower as she has felt unclean and betrayed since waking up this morning in Josh's bed in the manner it had occurred. The shower does her wonders and she starts to feel almost normal afterwards. Once done she returns to the Lanie's office chairs to wait for lab results.
Kate's thoughts about the incident the night prior are running everywhere. See feels betrayed by Josh, to whom she had given her trust. She knew of Josh's jealousy for Rick and that it may have caused him to carry out what had happened that past night. She had her doubts about Josh but had given him the benefit of those doubts. Had she been wrong in doing so? The Josh she had been with that last night was not the same Josh she had known these last months of dating him. Had Josh fooled her? Was Josh in fact a predator disguised in sheep's clothing? Had she misjudged him like she had Sorenson, who also had betrayed her, but in another manner.
The common link between her past boyfriends, Wil and Josh, was that they both had acted without her consent or approval. Both had decided they knew what she wanted and acted on that assumption in error. Both had thought she would play along with their actions. That for Kate is a betrayal that results in the immediate termination of the relationship. Kate was once again reeling from a failed relationship. Her choices in men to date had been deeply lacking.
Then she thought of Rick. With all that she had put him thru, he had remained steadfast, even though last summer he had left her. Still, Rick's saving grace had been his return to her and his admission of his feelings for her. Rick had since become her north star, guiding her through all the complexities of her life and helping her to cope. Now that she is in yet another failed relationship, Kate would need him more than ever before. Rick Castle had become her only emotional rock, and now she had to let him know that by acknowledging it.
A couple hours or so later, Lanie returns with test results.
"Well, my physical exam indicates no physical signs of abuse. I did test for sperm and there was none either on you or your clothes. However test shows positive for the presence of rohypnol in your system."
"Roofies? The date rape drug!"
"Yes."
"So Josh spoke the truth. He did try something but stopped at the last moment", says Kate incredulous to what Lanie had found but now thankful she had answers.
"You got him on attempted sexual assault Kate and pushing of an illegal drug, if you want to charge him. The assault may be hard to get a conviction. For sure you have him on a drug charge, if nothing more than an illegal possession, but that could go from misdemeanor to felony depending on the circumstances. I think you have him on a felony here. You want to press charges?"
"I don't know Lanie if I want to take it to that level. I broke up with him and that may be punishment enough for him."
"Well, if he tried it now, he may have done it in the past and may attempt again on another woman in the future. If that happens, do you want that on your conscience? You should think about pressing charges. Breaking up from him might not be enough as a consequence, if you ask me."
"Charges would ruin his career, just for this one lapse of judgment which he in the end did not carry out. Do not let this incident detract from Josh's good qualities. Those qualities are what attracted me to him in the first place. My sense after all this, is that it will not happen again. As to Josh's doing it in the past, I think he may have tried once or twice before but has not since then. I think Josh's jealousy about Rick got the better of him. The decision to charge him is big and I need to think about it."
"Just saying girl, you had him wrong in the first place, can you still trust that judgement on his future actions?"
"I will need to consider that, but thank you for all of this Lanie."
"Girl, you know I'm here for you, but what now?"
"I honestly don't know yet Lanie. I'll need time here to consider."
Kate returns to her apartment and for the remainder of the day tried to get back to a normal.
The 12th After The Breakup
She gets up bright and early on the following Monday and is the first one into homicide. No case today, but lots of paperwork; statements and the like in preparation for prosecution of a case. She works straight for an hour or so. It helps her to forget about that Saturday date with Josh and the breakup. She hears the ding of the elevator on her floor and it is Espo and Ryan getting into work. About 45 minutes later Castle arrives coffee and bear claw in hand. He puts them on Kate's desk. Without thought, Kate reaches out for the coffee and takes a sip.
"Good morning detective, how was your weekend?"
Kate says nothing.
"That bad,... despite the date with Josh?"
Another long pause.
"What happened Kate?", asks Castle sensing something is very wrong.
"We broke up, okay? I don't want to talk about it."
"OH..Huhmmm, well, yeah, right, I'll be quiet as a mouse", Rick says as he makes a gesture like he is zipping his mouth shut.
She broke up with Josh! Good news for Rick, but he knew that Kate would be out of it for a while. Breaking up is always an emotional event, and Kate in particular would take it hard. So Rick decides he will quietly and patiently be there for her.
About mid-morning the elevator on their floor rings and out pops a delivery man with a bouquet of flowers. Carnations with some roses interspersed among them in the setting.
"Katherine Beckett?", asks the delivery man.
Everyone points to Kate. He places the flowers on Kate's desk, has her sign for them, and leaves. Kate continues her work, not bothering to acknowledge the delivery and refusing to look at the bouquet.
"You going to read the card at least Kate?", questions Castle.
"No need, I know who they're from and so do you. That boat has sailed!"
By the end of the day the bouquet would be in the trash can of their kitchenette.
"Well at least he is trying to get back, which tells me you initiated the breakup."
"I told you I didn't want to speak about it Castle."
"Right!", he gets up and heads for their kitchenette. Minutes later he returns with a cup of coffee.
"Here, this might help you get thru the day", he says, placing the coffee on her desk.
Again Kate reaches out automatically without thought and gets the cup and takes a sip.
When Castle is back again in his chair, Kate addresses him.
"Thank you Rick. Thank you for being a friend, my best friend."
"Always."
Come the end of the day, it had been one of tension in the air. A tension that Rick Castle was trying to fathom. He realizes that the breakup hit Kate hard. Worst, it appears she had initiated the split and was disturbed by it. Was this a repeat of what had happened with Demming that summer past? She had broken up with Demming back then so she could be with Rick for a weekend at his Hampton home. But Rick lost his chance when he let Gina take Kate's place. He had done so because he could not stand being with Kate and seeing her with Demming.
Now Kate had broken up with Josh, giving Rick and her a chance once again to be together. If the breakup had happened as Rick surmised, and it was likely so, Rick was prepared now not to let this one opportunity slip past him, as he had done with Demming. He was now ready to fully pursue Kate and let her know that he really wanted her.
"Kate", he says as she grabbed her coat to leave for the day, "anything planned? How about dinner at the loft. I prepared vegan lasagna the other day, just needs to be heated. I will top it off with salad, garlic bread, and wine. Dinner is Italian gelato."
'You're on Writer Man!"
They get to the loft and to Kate's surprise it is just them.
"So where is Alexis and Martha tonight?", she asks.
"We have the loft to ourselves. Alexis is doing a sleep study over with her classmates. Martha, well Martha will be out, although she did not share with me where she would be."
Kate smiles. Only Rick could talk about his mother in such a comic and dramatic manner, truly the son of Martha Rogers, the actress.
After dinner, they watch a DVD. Kate was interested in Rick's collection of movie classics and she chooses 'Casablanca' to watch, a Humphrey Bogart-Ingrid Bergman classic. They watch on Rick's sofa. Kate is resting against his chest, while Rick has his arm over her shoulders. Kate is holding the bowl of popcorn that Rick had prepared. They are both dipping into the bowl to get the popcorn as they watched the classic movie. Wine glasses are on the sofa table in front of them. Wine and popcorn. Doesn't get any better than that!
Rick can smell the fragrance of Kate's cherry shampoo and body wash as they sit together in comfort. It was the scent of her that always played with his mind. Tonight was no different. Kate loves the feel of Rick's arm draped over her shoulders and the feel of his strong chest on her back. She had shared like this before with Josh, but it felt so much more secure and comfortable with Rick. Kate could now think about her feelings for Rick without being guilty about Josh. She and Rick were free now to explore where they might go from here.
The evening ends and Rick calls his car service to drive her home.
Rick escorts her out to the service car. Dave, the driver, is holding the door open for Kate. Before she enters the car, she turns to Rick and gives him a passionate good night kiss to his lips with lots of tongue. Rick has his hand on the small of her back and the other hand on her back proper, as he pulls her in and returns the kiss with as much passion.
When they break the kiss, Kate tells him in a breathless voice, "Thank you for the dinner, it was a great night."
"Always!", Rick answers and then turns to Dave the driver.
"Make sure she gets home safely Dave."
"Certainly Mr. Castle."
Rick watches as the limo drives away.
At Kate's Apartment
Dave the driver sees Kate to the entry door of her apartment building. That was a mistake! She should have let him see her to her apartment door, but it was getting late and each had wanted to be home sooner rather than later. When Kate takes the elevator up to her floor and heads to her apartment, who should be there waiting, seated on the floor in front of her apartment door, but one Josh Davidson. He must have been waiting there for hours.
"Josh, what are you doing here? I said we're are quits and I never want to see you again."
"It's late Kate, who were you out with? Castle?"
"That is no longer your concern Josh. We are done."
"Kate, at least let me explain."
"There is nothing to explain. You chose to do what you did and now you no longer have me as a girlfriend. You need to stay away. We can do this the easy way or the hard way. The easy way is we split like many couples do and move on, or I charge you with a crime. That's the hard way!"
"You would do that?'
"After that night, the next morning, I called Lanie to exam me. I have enough forensic evidence to charge you with attempted sexual assault and drug possession. Your call, how do you want to do this?"
Josh realizes he has no fight here. He is once again intimidated with this version of Kate, one he has never seen before last night. Is this now the Detective Beckett portrayed in the Castle novels as Nikki Heat, the epitome of a strong and capable female homicide detective? The real persona now in front of him is so much more intimidating than the character in the Heat Novels. Josh actually has a sense of fear, like an animal trapped with no escape.
"And one more thing, if in the future another woman comes out and accuses you of assault, I will back her up and corroborate her claim with my evidence, is that clear? There will be no other attempts by you on women in the manner you tried the other night. Should it happen, I will bring the full brunt of law enforcement against you Josh. Is that understood?"
He bristles with indignation, "Kate that is only the second time I have done something like this and it was wrong. That first time ended consensually as my date did not pass out like you did."
"So you used it as a what... an aphrodisiac? Is that your excuse? No matter, I just want you to be clear on what needs to happen here?"
Josh hesitantly, but wisely, accepts Kate's conditions. He gives her a head nod in the positive, acknowledging her conditions for his 'release'.
"Bye Kate, I am truly sorry for how it ended. I...I...have no excuse, but I did not carry out my initial intent, does that not count for something?"
"That is the only reason I am giving you an out here. So go Josh, just go, before I lose my resolve and haul you to jail. You had your chance with me and blew it! I am being more than generous here. I can ruin you if I wanted to, but I will give you a chance to live up to what I initially saw in you. Prove me right in that initial judgement!"
Josh leaves not attempting again to speak to her or even be in her company.
When Josh is gone, Kate enters her apartment. She speed dials Rick.
"Hey Kate."
"I'm home Rick."
"Made it safely."
"Not quite."
"Thought Dave saw you to your door?"
"He did, to the entrance door of the building, but not to my apartment door."
"So what happened?"
"Josh was there. In front of my apartment door."
"He didn't try anything bad did he?", there is concern in Rick's voice.
"No Rick, I sent him packing once again and told him to never see me ever."
"He left that easily without giving up a fight?"
"I threatened him if he did not leave I would take action against him?"
"Oh?", replies Rick realizing how final this breakup with Josh is and how it might have actually happened. Kate's tone of voice over the phone is a testament as to how they ended.
Rick continues, "So I take it that it did not end well with Josh? Did he try something the other night Kate? It must have been so, if the tough cop persona came out in dealing with Josh earlier."
And there it is, the reason why Rick Castle was a good crime novelist and part-time amateur detective. Rick's ability to make quantum leaps to come to a conclusion. He had used this skill to determine what had happened with Josh and how it had ended. The fact he did not probe the matter deeper was a statement of Rick's empathy for Kate in this instance.
"I don't want to speak of it. I just want to move on", Kate replies and though not explicitly stated, Rick knew what had happened the other night between her and Josh.
"That's fine, I understand fully, but I know that side of you, the Cop side. It can be more than intimidating. Josh does not know that side of you; so it must have really hit him hard seeing you in Beckett mode. I would have liked to have seen the look on him when you threaten him."
"Yeah, you would have liked that", and Kate smiles at that thought, "I called and just wanted you to know. I miss hearing your voice."
She had been safe and comfortable when Rick was with her earlier and after what just happened with Josh, she felt Rick's absence.
"Kate we were just together about 90 minutes ago."
"I know, I still miss your presence. I have grown so accustomed to you near. It feels different when you are not by my side. But know this Rick Castle, I want to see how far we can go with us. This new circumstance should have happened last summer. I should have gone with you then to the Hamptons and all this and Josh would have never happened. I made a mistake when I agreed to dating Josh but he was so persistent and sincere when he asked. He came to me during a time when I was down in spirit and he had uplifted me. He was what I needed at that moment. I should have ended it when you returned. It would have simplified everything."
"Water under the bridge Kate. The future is ours to make what we want of it now."
"Yeah it is."
"Till tomorrow Kate."
"Till tomorrow Rick."
She hangs up on him but feels alone and abandoned. When had she grown to long for Rick's company? Josh would leave her on DWB missions for 30 days at a time, and she never longed for him. She ends her phone call with Rick and feels his absence. Before she met Rick she had been serenely independent and content before they'd met. Surely she could be that way again, and yet,...she had grown so accustomed to him near. He always made her day begin with his offerings to her in the morning. His companionship was second nature to her now, like breathing in and breathing out. She had come to accept Rick's presence in her life. Kate realizes now that she could no longer continue that life without him at her side!
It took this sad and horrible breakup with Josh to make all those feelings for Rick come out even stronger than before. This situation with Rick had come upon Kate over time and had so slowly and silently changed her. It had happened without much attention or notice on her part; so gradual and subtle it had been.
And then it came to her, like a lightning bolt striking from above, quickly and brightly! It was more than a longing for him when he was absent. It went far beyond that... she is falling in love with him!
Her feelings for Rick had grown into something much more. It was both a joyful and scary realization, but she was ready now to commit to Rick. No foot out the door on this one, she needed to give of herself fully. With that notion on her mind, Kate went to bed. Her wall needs to come down for Rick!