Soul Marked
Chapter Forty-One
Words that Connect the Soul
Guys! Guys! This is the chapter I've been waiting to release for a while! I was so excited while writing it. A bit emotionally draining but I poured my heart and soul into it.
I hope you all enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it.
Something like an itch started up inside of Izuka as she found herself back at the dorms. She had taken her things up to her room, wishing to grab a shower, and a change of clothes, before settling in for the night. Her classmates were high on excitement, and the buzz of congratulations and happiness rose and crashed against her, as she took it all in.
This odd sensation had been nagging at her since the bus ride back. It wasn't one of her emotions. She had gotten over the slight turn of her stomach as she thought about Toshi, and carefully avoided saying his other name, and the phone she had stashed inside her bedside table wasn't a strong enough concern to make her skin crawl at the moment.
No, this wasn't from her.
With the practice she had been gaining in identifying which one of her soulmate's feelings she was radiating, it hadn't taken long to realize that this was what Kacchan was feeling, and not Shigaraki. She wasn't able to reach into his mind and pluck out the reason, but Izuka could assume, as the day's events hadn't been the greatest for him.
Her eyes studied the common area, waiting for any sign of Bakugo, as she idly chatted with Kaminari, Momo, and Kirishima.
It didn't take long for his appearance. It was the same habit for the last several weeks. As long as Izuka wasn't in her room he would appear not long after her, staying within eyesight, until he would disappear upstairs to go to bed. It was like clockwork.
Her eyes were glued to him the entire time, even as she spoke to the others, only half paying attention, as their gazes locked. That sensation of unease and anxiety seemed to dissipate, as they stood there gazing at one another. Izuka felt a trickle of happiness at the thought that maybe she had done that for him. He was always helping her. She wanted to help him as well.
It's just Kacchan was far too stubborn to allow her that luxury, and she had to force it onto him. Sometimes he didn't know what was good for him. Izuka wanted to help with that too.
Gazes still locked, Izuka noticed when he shifted, his head motioning toward the kitchen, silently telling her to meet him. She watched as he walked out, and Izuka didn't hesitate, for him she wouldn't, as she apologized to her friends, and told them she needed to leave, that she would talk to them again later. Later might never come tonight, but that wasn't something Izuka could be bothered with, not when Kacchan wanted to speak to her.
He hardly ever spoke with her anymore.
Izuka didn't want to make him wait. She didn't want to wait.
She slipped silently into the dark kitchen, the way the shadows engulfed her, swarming around her didn't bring caution, maybe it would have, but Katsuki was suddenly there, and she was engulfed by his sweet scent. Any images that may have tried to force their way through could always be pushed back by his mere presence.
He leaned against the island that had been placed in the middle of the kitchen. Izuka came to a stop in front of him, leaning in slightly, as she breathed more of him in, as it calmed her racing heart. The shadows turned into something normal, and non-scary, as they formed back into what the world should always be for her.
Neither of them made a move to speak. Izuka knew she could break the silence, and ask why he had asked her to follow, but she was basking in the realization that this was the closest she had been to him when not in an exam, or any situation outside of one of her attacks, or forced approximation. An urge to close the distance between them, to press into his side, and be as close as possible nudged at her, but Izuka carefully locked it away.
Even right now she could see that he looked on edge. The way he watched her every movement, each twitch of muscle was carefully taken in by his sharp gaze, told her that there was definitely something wrong.
"You wanted to speak to me?" Izuka broke first. She couldn't stay silent any longer and was unable to do what she really wanted to; she was forced to let out her nervous energy in another way. She had always been good at talking.
He eyed her for a moment longer. Izuka watched the way he shifted, something passing over his face, and she caught the way his hand almost seemed to lift toward her before falling back down. It had almost been like it never moved at all, but Izuka knew better. Kacchan wasn't prone to moving restlessly when it came to nerves or otherwise.
"Meet me later after everyone goes to bed." The sudden sound of his voice had her jumping as her gaze darted back up toward his face, and not at his hand.
"Later? You want to meet me?"
"Out front. I need to talk to you."
"O-oh, okay." Izuka found herself confused. Katsuki hardly ever broke the rules. For all of his bad attitude, he was a stickler for the rules, and for his schedule. The fact that he was willing to break both told her something was weighing on him heavily. "Of course. I'll be there."
She was caught again, in that stare of his, the crimson orbs melting her, as she felt time come to a stop around here, and there was only Kacchan. Moments like these have been happening more often to her as of late. She wanted to be close to him, constantly, to spend time with him, to bask in his presence, as she let the sensation of their bond flow through her. She wanted it badly, but he still hadn't come to terms with everything between them, and she was asking for a lot, she knew that. She was asking for him to follow her, to help save a well-known villain, who had hurt them, hurt her, in the past. She was asking this of him for someone she hadn't completely come to terms with yet but wanted to help because of that connection between them, but more importantly than that but because he deserved to be saved.
As a human being, Shigaraki deserved to be saved, and Izuka was determined to do that, regardless of what she decided to feel about him when it came to their bond.
She watched as Kacchan pulled away, and moved away from her, back toward the common room, and Izuka knew what they would be talking about that night.
Izuka knew how Katsuki spoke.
She wasn't quite certain what to expect, but she would finally know her answer tonight.
That brought upon its own spark of nervous energy that bubbled up from her stomach.
子猫
They walked side by side, the moon high in the sky, lighting the way in front of them, as Izuka confusedly glanced around the surrounding area. When she had met him out front Izuka hadn't expected to be led away from the building, toward the training grounds, but she followed after him. Silently. Trusting him to lead her somewhere safe so that they could have their discussion and not be overheard.
He wouldn't do anything to put her in harm's way.
Occasionally, with how close she walked to him, their hands would brush against one another, but neither moved, to place more space between them, and she took comfort in the ripple of electricity that ran across her skin at the touch.
Emotions surged up between them, rolling and twisting, a clear indicator that he was still experiencing something that bothered him, and so she stayed quiet, not bothering to fill the empty silence, as she knew soon enough all of her answers would fall out.
Izuka just didn't know what to expect. He had started to change, not reacting in the way that she had expected, and a part of her grew worried, as all of his tells were changing, and another was proud of the growth he had shown.
When they came to a stop in Ground Beta Izuka found herself not completely surprised by the revelation. She saw the significance this place held for them, but she was still confused over the reasoning, and what he needed to speak about. This only made her wonder even more. Perhaps her realizations weren't as spot on as she had suspected.
He didn't make her wait for much longer.
His voice broke the silence around them, drawing her to him, as he spoke in that soft, and hesitant voice.
"This is where we had our first battle training, don't you remember, and I lost to you, but that hadn't been the thing that I regretted that day. I struggled with that knowledge. I wasn't upset because of losing to you, but what I did to you that day, in my inability to listen to what this bond was telling me, and the way it twisted my insides. I was too proud." He turned to face her, no longer baring his back at her, and Izuka felt herself tense up at his words. She didn't like remembering their relationship back then.
She could remember the way he had fought against the bond, could see the hell he had gone through, and what she had been put through, all because of their bond having been damaged since the moment it had been made.
His face stayed carefully blank, but he couldn't hide from her, Izuka watched as his eyes showed the torment he was feeling and the way the bond between them flowed his feelings freely between them. It urged her to pay attention, to listen, to take in what he was saying, and more importantly what was kept guarded inside of himself.
She kept silent. Allowing him to continue. Knowing it was needed that he got this all out.
"It was a realization that hit me in the gut and kept me from being able to breathe. I had done that to you… and I didn't know if it would change the relationship between us… to be that driving force to make you turn away and leave me, finally." His shoulder hunched over himself, and Izuka watched as a small, barely noticeable shake began to ripple through him, as he struggled to keep that carefully put together façade from breaking apart. "And you should have. But you're so stubborn. You never do what's right for you. You're always trying to put others before yourself and isn't that just something that burns at me, you should put yourself first more often.
And then right when I think I can actually be that person you deserve, to make up for all the shit I put you through, I realize just how weak I still am. You were taken from me. From right in front of me and I couldn't do anything, anything, to change it. I was helpless. You were gone, and I didn't know if I was ever going to see you again, to prove my worth to you, and I couldn't live with that.
You were just gone, and I was drowning in these worthless feelings, and I couldn't make that difference, but then there you were, back with me, no matter how unrealistic those odds had been, and I still couldn't do it. I still pushed you away.
And for what! Because you told me about that other connection… that I was no longer the only one bound to you… and I was afraid you'd leave me yet again."
His voice had grown quieter as he spoke and had fallen to a mere whisper at the end, forcing Izuka to step forward, to invade his personal space, to listen to those words he desperately needed to say. Her heart tugged painfully as she listened. She could see that pain and uncertainty in his eyes, and she worried that this had been inside of him all of this time, and she had been ignoring it, trying to come to terms, and deal with those emotions from Shigaraki, that she had placed Kacchan on the back burner, and had caused him to unnecessarily stew within them all on his own.
"I understand how you work. You're not just going to walk away from him. That isn't in you, regardless of what he's done to you, because your so fucking good."
Izuka didn't dare speak, didn't dare breathe, as she listened as his heart poured from his mouth.
For the first time in their life, in any of the relationships they had throughout their life, Kacchan was baring himself completely for her. She couldn't mess that up. To make him back down, and walk away, yet again, from something he needed. Not if they wanted this change.
She desperately wanted that change.
"You're like this bright light people can't escape from, they don't want to, because basking in it is like nothing you've ever experienced before, almost as if we've lived all of our lives in the dark, and you were our personal sun, warming us."
Katsuki paused here, those emotions, and sensations building dangerously up inside of him, causing him to grow unsure, not knowing what he wanted to express, as it all turned blackened and dangerous. The bond pushed and tugged at him, urging him forward, but he didn't know how to keep going, what to say, to change it. He didn't know how to feel. This dark aura inside of him, of jealousy, self-hatred, and doubt, built and grew every day, and he just wanted some way to ease it. To dispel it and allow him to breathe again.
"I-," Izuka's words failed her, as she continued to stare in surprise at Kacchan, at everything he had shown her. Words always seemed to fail them. They had never been good at talking, forming their connection in the way others had. No, they had always spoken better with contact, with things said between them, felt together, when they fought. That may not have been the most conventual, or even healthy way of coping, but it was theirs.
She could see that frustration building up inside of him, could feel how it dangerously swirled inside of him, threatening to engulf him, and Izuka didn't want to lose him to that anger and sadness. Not like all the other times that she had. This time had to be different.
They needed something different.
"Spar with me."
"W-what?" His eyes darted up toward her, they had been so heavy, so full of grief, and self-loathing, that now all there was, was confusion. For the first time, she had left him feeling like the one left behind, and not understanding. He was the confused one.
"You hurt me here once, allowing your anger and distress to get the better of you, so fight me. Show me that you can stay in control, right here, right now, show me exactly how you feel, and how you won't hurt me."
They always fell back to this, but Izuka was determined that this time they would make it, to break through those invisible barriers between us, and it started with this. Their ability to talk, to fight, to do something without hurting the other, and instead healing.
This was who they were.
She wanted to believe in him without a doubt.
He needed her to understand.
Both of them reacted at the same time. Explosions ripped through the air behind him, lighting up the night, with sound and light, and she darted forth, far quieter, less noticeable, but just as powerful.
They met in the middle, blow for blow, equal, two halves of a whole, learning to heal together.
Izuka could feel her heart pounding in her chest, but not from fear, or desperation, like that time before, but from excitement. With each blow, each attack, where it met their skin, the bond would leak through, warming, and strengthening, pushing them forward, as their feelings flowed easily through the connection.
She could feel the way he felt inside. All of those emotions twisting and turning, and she reached out with her own, of comfort, and ease, beckoning him to give in, and to accept what they could be for one another.
Neither hit hard enough to hurt, instead, a flash of lightning would erupt between them, before they darted off, and met once more. Quirks were not used to hurt, to cause pain, to push back, but instead a mere distraction, as their bodies moved like one, in a dance, rather than a fight. They listened to one another, anticipated the other's next move, and adjusted accordingly.
It was as if for once in their lives they were connected like true soulmates.
子猫
Aizawa could feel the stress eating away at him as he fled the dorm room that class 1-A had been assigned. He knew who the two would have been, and if it had been any other night, he might have been worried about the destruction they would have caused, but as of recently, and with the report that came to him, Aizawa didn't feel that rush of unnecessary fear.
Everything those two had been through recently, what they were forced to experience, it was like nothing two that age should ever have to go through. Worse, it wasn't something any pair of soulmates should ever know.
He felt that as long as their spar stayed the way it was going he could take his time, allow them to work out whatever it was they were going through, and maybe, he hated to admit it, but if this allowed him some peace from all the drama, then it only caused him less of a need to break it up before they had finished.
It would be nice to know that front had changed and was less volatile, and if the boy could get his head screwed on right, then Aizawa would need to worry less about the girl.
As he stepped out into the cool night air, he wasn't surprised to see All Might standing there, waiting for him, probably hoping to talk him into letting him go instead. A sigh forced its way through his lips as he watched the determination in the man. He wasn't bought on the idea of being a good one. Regardless of whether or not he had received a text from the girl, why did they even have one another's phone information anyway, Aizawa had his suspicions and it only caused even more of a headache to build behind his eyes, so he forcefully pushed that train of thought away.
"It's not a good idea," he spoke aloud as he came to a stop in front of the man. "What happens if you trigger her into another episode? We shouldn't push her any more than we already are. Aikawa put rules into place for a reason."
"I won't do anything unnecessary. If I see that she can't handle it, I'll back off and allow them to go to you. I need to do this."
Aizawa didn't doubt that the man would do just as he said. He was awfully fond of the girl, and if he hadn't had access to her birth certificate, and the name that was placed under her father, then he would have suspected him of holding the title.
Except Aizawa knew better.
And that only left him with his other answer and that somehow was worse.
He could feel that headache begin to nag away at him.
"You back off as soon as there are signs of anything wrong with her. Once they know they have been found out they'll know they should find me. I'll be waiting nearby."
"Thank you." All Might bowed. This seemed more important to him than just his job as a teacher.
That puzzle would only put more weight on Aizawa's already piling up responsibilities, and so he forced it back, and away from his line of thinking, as he followed silently behind the man.
子猫
They both landed on the opposite side of the road, breathing heavily, chests rising and falling rapidly, as they locked gazes with one another. Izuka could feel the adrenaline pumping wildly through her veins, as it sang within her soul, and this, this is what she should have felt when sparing against Kacchan. This is what had been missing. This understanding, the intertwining of emotions, and feelings, as it surrounded them, and brought them together as one. In the future, if they could continue to fight like this, it would allow them to effortlessly, and fluidly team up with one another, a powerhouse team, that moved as one.
She wanted that so badly.
She could taste it. Could almost touch it. They were so close.
Izuka darted forward, her mind already calculating, taking in the way his body moved, to predict what he was going to do next, but suddenly, a startling realization hit her like a ton of breaks. He wasn't attacking. Any motion he had fallen into was aborted, and he was just standing there, his body limp, and being held up only by the strength of his legs, and not the willpower of his mind. She forced her leg out of the swipe and avoided hitting him, knowing it would have been the blow to bring him to his knees, but she didn't want that. Winning wasn't their intention tonight. He was their intention. Allowing him to get out his emotions, understand, and feel them.
She came to a halt, standing in surprise, as they were mere inches away from one another. Katsuki began to shake. His body jerked, as those tears built up in his eyes, and they fell free, in hot torrents of desperation, and emotions so tightly strung, that there was no way he could keep them from exploding forth. Not anymore. Suddenly his legs gave out, dropping him, as his arms came up, surrounding her, tugging her forward, as his face was then buried into her stomach.
Izuka felt as she blinked, that confusion, having never seen him in such a way, so vulnerable, rippled through her, as she slowly raised her hands, one moving to card through his hair and the other rubbing at his back. Startling clarity surrounded her, as his emotions melded to her, flowing through where they were joined, as he clutched desperately at her back, and his face pressed closer to her stomach. She could feel the tears, how they burned into her skin and soaked through her shirt.
He was opening himself up completely to her. No longer was the anger burning into his mind, searing its hatred into his very being, he was simply exhausted. The kind of tired that drug itself through her bones, forcing you down into an abyss, as you struggled to find the grip to climb back out. And Izuka, she was the only thing keeping him holding on, not allowing him to fall deeper, as she surrounded him in her warmth, forcing the cold that threatened to seep into his very being far away. He struggled to regain his breath, to find his bearings, as he lost himself in the sensation of the comfort, she gave him so freely.
"Why?" His voice was muffled, clipped, and exaggerated with the tears that fell from his eyes as he tried talking through them, and the cloth of her shirt. "Why is it always me? Why am I always too weak? Why hadn't I been strong enough to keep you from being taken away from me?"
He shook harder, the sobs wracking through him, pouring out as his feelings melted into one with his words. Izuka could only hold on tighter. She pressed him closer. She reminded him silently that she was there with her presence, and she didn't dare interrupt him, far too afraid that she would break the spell that was on him, and he'd clamp back up.
"I've got no freaking idea what I'm supposed to do!" He sobbed in her embrace, trying to make sense of everything that was pouring out of him, just as fast as he was experiencing them. It was all entirely new to him, but it was far too late to back down now, Katsuki wasn't sure if he could bottle it all back up if he tried. This was a force to be reckoned with and he was no longer in control. All he could do was hold onto Izuka and hope that it didn't end in disaster.
That she didn't end up leaving him.
"Why do I still fail, even now, when I'm trying so hard to change and to be better? I still failed in getting my provisional license, and you're going to be out there, constantly in danger, without me, and I can't be there for you if something were to happen. I can't still be this weak, this warped, to not get it."
Izuka bit her lip. She could feel her own tears begin to build up behind her eyes as she listened to what he was feeling. Everything he had hidden away inside of himself. She wanted to help. To heal him.
She allowed him to keep talking.
"Then he came along, and you're telling me that this asshole, who hurt you, who took you away, is a part of you. He shouldn't get to experience that. He shouldn't get to realize how lucky he is to have you. He shouldn't get to realize something that I've spent my whole life running away from. But he also shouldn't be like me and ignore that. It burns me up thinking that he'll push you away too, to hurt you in that way, after everything you've already been put through, you don't deserve two assholes tied to you."
His breathing fell out in gasping breaths as his words grew faster and more emotional. She could see the sparkle of tears building in his eyes as he suddenly yanked his head away from her, to look up at her, as he fiercely blinked the tears away. His voice broke as he spoke. He stumbled, uncertain of his ability to say what he was feeling, unused to expressing his feelings in such a way, and that made him raw. It prickled at him, causing him to shudder, as he felt each painful stab build up inside of him, as he bared it all to her.
She deserved to know him in his entirety.
He couldn't keep holding back and hoping that she would just stick around.
"I don't deserve you."
You shouldn't keep putting up with me.
Izuka frowned at the unsaid words that drifted between them.
"I don't deserve you, but I don't want to lose you."
He stared up at her, those glowing red orbs burning bright, as they bared his entire being to her, opening themselves up to her, so that she could gaze into his very soul.
"I love you."
Izuka felt as her legs gave way, at hearing those words, to see them etched into his every pore, it took her strength away, and she knelt in front of him. She collapsed in a similar position he had found himself in, and they were suddenly holding one another up, leaning into each other, being the strength the other lacked. They completed one another in such a way that no one else could ever manage. No one else would have come close.
Leaning forward Izuka suddenly felt her forehead make contact with his own, how their breath mingled between one another, intertwining, as their hearts beat as one. Their arms tied them together, and if anyone had tried to come between them, they would have found it impossible to separate the two.
"I've always admired you from a distance, chasing after you," Izuka whispered softly, allowing her words to drift the short distance between them. "You were this amazing person in my life, right in front of me, and I couldn't help but to want to chase you. I've always loved you, Kacchan. That love just grew and changed, and I've found myself falling in love with you."
Izuka bared herself to him, completely, just as he had, not feeling a trace of embarrassment that she might have if this had been any other moment. All that was left were those raw emotions, in their simplest form, as she gazed at him in adoration.
"I don't want you going anywhere," she continued, determinedly. "I'm not going to leave you, or suddenly wake up one day and decide that I can't deal with you anymore. You're everything to me, and we deserve one another, we deserve what we're changing into, and the future that might come with that."
She watched as his gaze turned scorching.
It caused warmth to swarm her cheeks and before she could feel anything other than that heat that consumed its way through her body, his lips were suddenly on hers. She melted into his touch, feeling that bubble of desire build its way up, as she pressed further into him, wishing to imprint this moment into her mind's eye, as she chased after the sensation of happiness, elation, and love that threatened to overwhelm her. The bond floated forward, and much like it had during their spar, it engulfed them within one another, leaving them unable to tell where one began and the other ended.
They anticipated the others' needs, as hands gripped tightly to clothes, and breaths of air were only indulged when the need for air came to be too much to ignore. It caused her head to feel as if she was floating, and her mind to grow hazy, and all there was, was Kacchan, as her senses flooded with nothing but him.
She felt the way his lips moved against hers, mimicking the desperation, and need, as they chased after one another, and they were yet again equal.
A voice clearing itself broke through the bubble of understanding, and adoration, that they had surrounded themselves in. Blinking Izuka pulled reluctantly away from Kacchan, as her eyes focused on the man in front of her, but before she could settle on the realization of Toshi being in front of them, Katsuki had already shifted her, putting himself between the two of them, in a silent form of protection, just in case her mind bucked against the presence of this man.
Izuka watched as the man came to a stop in front of them. He had kept a healthy distance between them, being cautious, as he eyed her carefully for any sign that he needed to leave. She showed no signs of such a change and Toshi pushed a little more, wishing that he had been given the chance to congratulate her in person, and could have spoken to her sooner about everything she had gone through. Instead, he had become the enemy in her head, and it pained him to see how everyone watched the two of them, waiting, and wondering when he would be forced to disappear from her side once more.
"The reports stated the two of you were sparring," he coughed, feeling embarrassed at having caught them in such a position. He hadn't realized their relationship had changed to such a thing, and Toshi found himself realizing how truly out of the loop he was when it came to her now. Normally, he had been one of the ones she ran to for advice, regardless if it was for training, or about her soulmate issues, and now she had Aikawa for that.
It hurt a little more than he was willing to admit aloud.
"W-we were," Izuka choked out, partly due to being caught kissing, and partly due to whom she was talking to. She wanted to talk to him like she used to. She missed their get-togethers, how easy it had been to talk to him about anything, and everything. It had always made her wonder if this was how she would have interacted with her dad if he had been around.
"We came out here to talk," Bakugo said, his eyes narrowing. He was already going on the defensive, and Toshi backtracked, not wishing to cause the boy to revert to hostility, and for anything to remotely come close to triggering Izuka. "We didn't want to be overheard, it was about our bond, and we're not allowed to meet in each other's dorms."
Izuka wanted to snort, but the situation kept her from doing so, as she went back and forth between eyeing Toshi from out of the corner of her eye and turning her attention back to Katsuki, to remind her trigger-happy mind that he was still alive. She was certain that if he had wanted to talk in her dorm room, he would have found a way to do it regardless of the rules telling them they weren't allowed.
"I-I see." Toshi wondered how much they had managed to overcome in the period of time after she had been saved. How much was he truly behind in her life? "I didn't come out here to punish the two of you. I'll allow your homeroom teacher to take care of that. I came out here to talk to the two of you." He shuffled, ducking his head, as he thought over what he had managed to overhear while walking toward them before he had interrupted their kiss. His head was still spinning from that, and Toshi realized that if things didn't get better between Izuka and himself, he wouldn't be able to react in the protective way he wished to.
"Talk about what?" Izuka asked, forcing herself to look at him, as she held onto Kacchan's hand. His image barely wavered as she focused on the fact that Bakugo was alive, she could feel him, and the mantra of who Toshi was to her blared loudly in her thoughts. It was working, and she felt relief at that.
Even Toshi noticed the difference, the way her face didn't immediately bend to fear, and instead hinted at only caution. It caused his confidence to grow. Maybe, they could get past this.
"I realize that with everything going on, I've neglected the two of you. I wanted to give you your space, even when I noticed the struggles, especially in young Bakugo." Toshi shook his head, a sigh escaping his lips, as he apologized with not only his words, but his expressions. "I tried to keep in consideration that approaching Bakugo while you were struggling would not be a good idea, but it's my job, not only as his teacher but as your mentor, Izu-chan, to be there for him as well.
I saw during practice how he would get this look in his eyes, as his mind would drift off, and the distance he put between the two of you, but I failed to see how deep it was affecting him. I admit that when she was kidnapped, I was among the many who felt it was far more important in getting Izuka back that I failed to realize the trauma that this would cause you, young man."
Toshi strode forward, careful to keep a little distance between himself, and Bakugo, as he noticed the way Izuka's gaze had begun to watch him like a hawk. She was trying, Toshi could see the way her gaze wavered, as she battled with herself, but she was trying so hard to trust him, and Toshi would not throw that away.
He knelt, coming to eye level with the two, as he spoke from the heart.
"I'm deeply sorry. As an adult, I should have done better, by helping you during, and after, everything you must have felt, and were blindly dealing with on your own. You've been strong, young Bakugo. Not weak."
Izuka felt herself stiffening, not because she viewed Toshi as a threat, though her mind had tried to bend and warp the scene in front of her, but her heart refused to allow it. This man in front of her wasn't a killer. He would have never harmed Kacchan. He was someone precious to her, showing that because Kacchan was someone else she loved, he wished to reach out and drag him into their circle. That his desires were to take care of Bakugo and was fiercely apologizing for failing to do that.
She watched as he shuffled forward, closer, as his hand hesitantly reached out toward Bakugo, as her eyes followed the movement, and he slowed to show her his intent.
"You were only a boy. You shouldn't have had to go through all of this by yourself." His hand shifted through Bakugo's hair, messing it up, as he fondly ruffled it. "I'll have to be there for you more often. You should know you can come to me for anything, especially advice over things like soulmates." It hadn't been said yet, the connection Toshi had with Izuka, and why Toshi would be the best to talk about such things, but watching the two in front of him, he knew he would need to give Izuka the greenlight over revealing their secret. He couldn't ask her to continue keeping it a secret.
As soon as she could handle being around him. He would tell her to do it.
Izuka hadn't realized that there were tears falling down her face as she listened and watched the interaction in front of her. She had caught onto the unsaid meaning behind Toshi's words, because how could she not, when he offered that, and the look that had crossed over his features? How could she ever believe her mind, and let it twist this man in front of her, to allow herself to believe that Toshi would ever be a true threat to Bakugo? Her body began to shake as a sniffle fell from her lips.
"Izu-chan," he called out softly. His voice broke, seeing her like that, and not sure what he could do to make it better, whether or not his presence was causing it, and all that he was left to do was hover. At one point he would have pulled her into a hug, and spoken words of comfort, as he tackled the problem headfirst, but he hesitated here. "I'm sorry for failing you the most… what happened to you is my fault. These hardships were fated the moment I saw that spark inside of you and found myself determined to bring you under my wing."
Her head began to shake, denying his words, as the tears fell down harder.
"I had never expected to grow so close to you, to become involved in your life in the way I had, but that was, yet another failure on my part," he continued, his voice infused with affection. The type reserved for a father's love. "Looking back on my memories with my predecessor I should have known that a relationship with my own would be similar. I should have been there for you."
Bakugo sat silently, taking in the words being spoken around him, as he held on tightly to his soulmate, who looked to be falling apart, as he tried to wrap his mind around the hidden meanings, and the fact that the man in front of him, his hero, had apologized to him.
Izuka slipped from Kacchan's clutches, flinging herself that short distance between them, as she was suddenly clutching at Toshi's too-big shirt. She buried her face in his shoulder, as he continued to kneel, his arms hanging at his side in surprise, as his mind caught up with the events that were happening. She continued to sob, her body shaking viciously, as she battled mentally, having not been this close since that night, and for one moment, her gut instinct was to lash out, before it was all drained away, and replaced with the desire for comfort.
The night air filled with her cries as she let loose all the turmoil that had built up inside her heart.
She let it all go as his arms came up to wrap around her, soft words cooed into her hair, as he gently led her into a sway that reminded her of faint memories with her father, as she would cry. That tight hold over her heart, the buried resentment, and sadness, eased up, as she melted further into him, allowing Toshi to wash it all away, and redefine in her heart who he was to her.
"I'm so sorry!" Izuka sobbed as she clutched ever tighter. "This isn't your fault. If I could go back, knowing everything I know now, I wouldn't change anything." She sniffled, trying to regain control back over her emotions, as she struggled to make sure he understood what she was saying. "I'd never change getting to know my hero in this way, cause your so much more than that now, you mean more to me." She sighed, feeling exhausted, but unburdened. "I've missed my dad."
"Izu-." Words failed him as his arms that had been holding her soothingly lost their grip at what she had just revealed to him. She felt the way it loosened but before doubts over whether she should have said anything or not could plague her, his grip reaffirmed itself, as he kissed the top of her head. "I've missed you as well."
As she closed her eyes there were no flashes of malicious images. She didn't worry about Kacchan being so close to them, that he was in danger, all she felt was a deep seeded love and affection for those closest to her at that moment.
I feel for Aizawa so much right now. This poor man and his job of keeping, especially these two, out of danger and trouble.
But omg were you guys expecting that?!