8

#

I was sitting at the Hufflepuff table with Teddy, Mia, Henry and Louisa. I tried not to scowl at the latter because I used to like her, but a few days ago I heard her gossiping with one of her friends about me and Ambrose. About how we shouldn't flaunt my relationship in front of others. That it made her uncomfortable. I'm guessing Teddy didn't know about her views, and I didn't know how to bring it up. They were going on a date this weekend and I just hoped he would see it for himself.

"Are you ready to go?" I asked Teddy, placing my bag over my shoulder, ready to get up.

"Yea-" He started but Louisa quickly interrupted.

"No." Louisa said, and Teddy and I halted from rising. "Teddy, you said we would take a walk together."

"Did I?" Teddy asked utterly confused.

"You told me last night, remember?"

"But it's snowing." I said when I glanced outside.

"Not everyone is afraid of snow." Louisa scoffed and I felt Teddy stiffen next to me.

"I-I'm not afraid of snow. I-" I breathed in deep trying to control my temper. I looked to Teddy. "You can go for your walk, I'll see you later."

"No, CJ-" He tried but Louisa tugged on his sleeve.

"Doesn't matter, I'll just go find my boyfriend." I flashed Louisa a vicious grin, because my eyes were on the girl, I didn't see Teddy scowl. "Find me in the tower later if you want to come over." I said, not looking at anyone before I walked out of the great hall. I wanted to drop a puking pastil in her drink so much. My footsteps haltered a little with the idea, but I continued walking. Teddy would know with one hundred percent certainty, it was me. I didn't have it in me to explain myself.

I didn't see Teddy for the rest of the night.

#

It was the second to last Hogsmeade weekend, in the middle of February. And Ambrose and I just came from Honeydukes, each with a bag of candy in our hands. He had his arm loosely over my shoulder as he tried to nick a chocolate from my bag.

"Oi, you have your own bag." I laughed, holding the bag out of his reach. "I asked you if you wanted chocolate drops, but you said no."

"Just one." He held up his index finger. "Please." He pouted.

"Fine." I smiled and put a drop in his open mouth. I leaned in and kissed him.

"Hmm." He hummed against my lips. "This taste even better." I laughed with a blush as I pulled back. "Let's go to the three broomsticks before we head back."

"Sounds go-" I stopped as my eyes caught something in the alley next to the tavern. Louisa was leaning against the side of the tavern. Teddy was flush against her, his hands on her hips and her hands in his hair. They were kissing, really kissing. Even from my standpoint, I could see their tongues gliding against each other. Something roared inside me, like an animal that woke up from a deep slumber. For a second, I thought I was feeling jealous, but that couldn't be. It was just because she was homophobic and she stole my time with my best friend, on purpose. I can't believe he's still seeing her. Did it really not come to his attention or did he choose not to see it, or even worse... agree with her. My breathing became heavy, and I didn't know where it came from.

"Hey." Ambrose had pulled his arm away from my shoulders at one point and tugged my sleeve. "Are you okay?"

I snapped my head towards him and swallowed. "Yeah, I'm fine. Let's go get a butterbeer." I took his hand in mine and walked in the crowded tavern. I took a seat while Ambrose offered to go grab us some butterbeers. My mind was reeling and I was gnawing my bottom lip as I glanced at the door. I really, really didn't like Louisa. I didn't like that she stole away time that Teddy usually spends with me, I didn't like that she hates gay people. I didn't like her hands all over -

"Here you go." Ambrose placed a drink in front of me. "Stop biting your lip. It's too lovely to be chapped."

I was too irritated to blush. I offered him a small smile and kissed him softly. "This better?"

"Much better way to occupy your lips with, yes." He grinned against my lips.

"Do you mind? People are trying to enjoy themselves."

Ambrose and my head snapped towards the voice. Two tables away from us sat Louisa and Teddy. Teddy was pulling on the paper on his bottle not looking at us, while Louisa scrunched up her nose.

"Mind your own business, Geller. You didn't hear us whining when you two were going at it a few minutes ago."

Teddy's head snapped up, but I looked to the hand that was holding mine tightly.

"Well, that's different." She huffed, sticking her nose in the air.

"Oh, and how's that?" Ambrose challenged.

"You know well what. Boys and boys are just not... normal."

My irritation flared up into anger. My eyes shot to the girl, ignoring Teddy's eyes. "Then you are going to hate this." I snapped before I pulled on Ambrose's collar and snogged him.

"Teddy." I heard her whine. "Make them stop."

"Let's just go."

I stopped kissing Ambrose but didn't look away from him. But I could see them leave from the corner of my eye. Ambrose's lips were still close, and I could feel his breath on me when he said. "Was that to annoy Louisa or make Teddy jealous?"

"What?" I blinked in surprise. "Obviously it was to make Louisa lose her mind." Right?

#

When I walked out of Charms two days later, Teddy ran up behind me, I haven't spoken to him since the day in the three broomsticks and I missed him terribly already. "Hey, come on, talk to me."

I pivoted on the spot, a glare in place. "You want to talk to me?" I took a step forward and from my look, he took a step back. "Sure your girlfriend doesn't mind? Sure you don't have a problem talking to a gay guy in public?"

"I already told you that I don't care that you're gay."

"But you just let Louisa talk to people like me like that? It sure looked like you agreed with her."

"I don't! I just didn't want to get in the middle of it. Besides you said last year you could fight your own battles."

"And I can! But this isn't just a battle for me, Teddy. It's for all the girls and the boys who are too afraid to come out because of people like her." I was getting angry; I felt my magic fibrate from it around me. People were looking at us as they walked by, but I didn't care they all could hear any of this. They should hear, the whole fucking school shoulder hear.

"I'm sorry."

"You said -" I prodded my fingers against his chest. "You would never pick a girl over us. But you did it then, you're doing it now with being with someone like that. And I'm sorry, Teddy, but I can't be your friend if you're with someone like her."

"CJ, please." He grabbed my arm as I turned around to leave. I shrugged him off, not looking at him before I walked away from him. My heart aching and breaking as I went. This – fighting – is happening way too much lately.

#

Three days later, Teddy appeared in front of me in the tower. I was working on my Transfiguration homework on one of the smaller tables near the window. I knew it was him even though I kept my head down. I always knew it was him. I didn't figure out till much later why that was.

I heard him take in a deep breath. "I broke up with her."

That made me look up. "Oh?"

"I'm sorry. I should've broken up with her the first time she said something like that. But I thought I could change her mind, you know, or it was just jealousy talking."

"Jealousy?"

"She was always jealous about the time we spent together." He waved his hand in the air, like he was waving away the ridiculous thought. But when he looked back at me, his brown eyes were nothing but sincere and regretful. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I know you -"

He stopped talking as I stood up in a second and wrapped my arms around him. "It's okay."

"It's not. It's not okay." He mumbled against my shoulder, shaking his head a little.

"No, you're right, it's not." I said pulling back, holding his shoulders at arm length. "Just... don't do it again."

"I promise. The next girl I date will be gay friendly."

"Next girl, right." I swallowed thickly. Why do I care about the next girl? Unless she's another homophobe, it shouldn't matter. Right? I sat back down at my table. "Why didn't you tell me about your first kiss? I told you about mine." I said dipping my quill in the ink as he sat down in front of me. "Or was what I stumbled upon your first kiss?"

"You really saw that?" He cringed a little and I hummed, not looking up from my essay. "But no that wasn't my first kiss. The first time was when Louisa and I took that walk around the grounds."

Oh, so that's why he didn't come that night because he was busy snogging some homophobic bitch. I was pressing so hard on my quill it broke through the parchment.

"But now I actually like to think that kiss from Elodie was my first kiss. At least she is someone who takes everyone as they are."

"Yeah." I smiled a little. "I would take kissing Elodie over her too."

Teddy laughed softly, his eyes going over my paper. "Are you okay? You pierced your essay."

"Hm? Yeah. Just tired." I said rubbing my forehead.

"Come on." He took my hand, stepping in front of me and pulled me up. "Let's get you to bed. You can read Jane Eyre again; it always calms you down." He said already dragging me up the stairs.

"You know me too well." I chuckled as we reached my dorm.

"I love being the one that knows most about you." He said, looking at the books on my nightstand. My heart did a little summersault, which I couldn't place. While he rifled through my books, I started to change into my pyjamas. When I put my head through the shirt, I saw Teddy's head snap back to the books, I smiled to myself.

"Here." I tossed him another set of pyjamas. "You can change in the bathroom if you want." I suggested.

He didn't answer and just tossed the Jane Eyre book in my hands before he started to undress himself. I flipped the book open to where my bookmark was, but my eyes shifted to Teddy when his shirt came off. He was tall and lean, slight muscle visible on his stomach and back. Then something happened that I didn't expect, and I quickly pulled the blankets over me and placed the book on my lap to hide a part of my body. I always knew Teddy was attractive, but I never had a reaction like this before. These are hormones, just hormones. Stupid teenage hormones. I clapped myself internally on the back of the head. Teddy grabbed another book from the nightstand and without hesitating slipped under the covers next to me. We shifted a little until we sat comfortable in bed, our shoulders leaning against each other.

An hour later we were both asleep. Books fallen open on our chests, our faces facing towards one another, so close that our breaths mixed together.