DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything from the Naruto universe.

Thinking (+ flashbacks, "Natsumi speaking to Kurama in her mindscape," etc.)

Emphasis

Bijuu, etc. speaking

Bijuu, etc. thinking

September 15th -

"Nghhhhhhhhhhhhya!"

"It's fine it's fine," Sakumo murmured encouragingly, trying and failing not to panic. Where the FUCK is JIriaya?!

"I'm not gonna make it," Natsumi panted between very fast, long, painful contractions. Sakumo was trying to get her to the alternate hospital site, but the man wasn't LISTENING! "NO ONE is going to BE THERE!"

"Oh shit, you're right!"

"Take me to the hospital," Natsumi demanded in a voice that sounded very much like Kurama's. Speaking of…

"Whatever you idiots are doing, you'd better fucking hurry."

"No way!"

"Yes, way! Don't you realize that one of those brats is literally minutes from being unleashed on this world?

"I thought that I was imagining it! What happened to hours of labor and pushing?!

"The fuck should I know?! It's been long enough, as far as I'm concerned. Close the seal!"

What?" Natsumi gasped. "No! Absolutely not!"

"Natsumi, listen to me." Kurama waited for her to stop her version of not-screaming, glad that she hadn't quite destroyed his sensitive ears yet. Her mother had definitely been louder. "This seal is going to open - almost tear - and I don't want you to..."

He winced and covered his glorious ears: he'd been too early to think that his vessel wasn't going to eventually scream her bloody orange head off. "JUST DO IT!"

Natsumi was on the ground, laying in front of him, panting and shivering all over. "I - are you sure?"

"PLEASE, Natsumi."

Natsumi felt like she was having an out-of-body experience as she somehow moved to the cage door even as she was crumpled on her mindscape's floor. "I'll open it again as soon as they're here, Kurama. I promise!"

Kurama looked away from her eyes - the ones that were identical to her brothers - through the closed cage door and relaxed, not realizing, for a moment, that a grin had crawled up his face. "You know, you're alright, Natsumi." Seeing the way she smiled at him before screaming her damn head off again, he said the only thing he could to save himself from further embarrassment. "You'd better open it back up! Now fuck off and go give birth to a shameless pervert!"

Natsumi began to pant out little wails, so maybe he'd gone a little too far with that comment.

"They're coming RIGHT NOW," Natsumi shouted as she began to bear down. Sakumo had picked her up and was repeatedly sunshinning her to God only knew where - making her dizzy - but then they finally landed in front of Orochimaru, who was having tea in what she realized later was a pretty sitting room. She was struggling to get away from him. All these bodily functions that were beyond her were NOT COOL!

"Oh?" the snakelike man asked, one eyebrow elegantly lifted as he gracefully stood.

"Sakumo," Natsumi shouted, pulling her husband down with her, her fists clenched into his Jonin vest. "Don't let the twins out of your sight! Swear it!"

"Yeah! Yeah, of course, Natty!"

"NO, GODDAMN IT! I don't care what happens to me, SWEAR you'll only keep the twins within reach!" She began pushing despite desperately not wanting to, unaware of what Sakumo said. She found herself lifted onto a bed that, thankfully, had a tarp on it.

"Why are you so prepared for this?!" Sakumo asked Orochimaru as he prayed that Natsumi wouldn't break his hand. As soon as she let up for an instant, he broke away to wipe her sweaty hair away from her face. He pulled a spare ponytail holder out of one of his cargo pants pockets and quickly tied it in her hair. "Isn't this too fast?!"

"Yes," Orochimaru calmly replied after washing his hands. "It is, but it happens. Hold the seal."

Sakumo swallowed hard, not liking in any way that his mate was exposed like this. He put his fingers on the edges of the seal that had revealed itself and was scaring the crap out of him as Natsumi continued pushing. Good God: they were in the middle of the village - not as close to the Hokage Tower as the hospital would have been, but what a mess! "It's alright baby: we're going to have our pups soon." God, he was awkward and out of his depth right now!

Natsumi screamed, leaning forward, and he grabbed her hand. She began sobbing after it happened.

"It's a boy," Orochimaru said simply. "He has your hair, Sakumo."

Sakumo stepped toward his pup, feeling as if he was in a daze. "Whaa," the pup growled out succinctly as if the newborn had either been ordered to or was being sarcastic. He was definitely unhappy, though.

For Sakumo, though, there were no words to describe how elated he was feeling!

"Hmmm. He's a quiet one," Orochimaru commented before pulling out a medical bag. It wasn't long before he began cleaning the newborn up.

"What about… What about our daughter?" Sakumo finally asked, looking back and forth between the son he'd sworn to keep his eyes on and Natty, who was out cold - other than occasionally muttering fevered obscene curses in her sleep.

"I'm sure it won't be long now," Orochimaru said, swinging his hair back behind him. He smirked at Sakumo. "Tie my hair! I guess this makes ME his godfather, ne?"

"One of them," Sakumo grinned as he tied back his friend's hair. He wasn't quite sure what to do. When he moved to pick up Kakashi - Oh my God: Kakashi-chan's here! - Orochimaru smacked his hand away.

"Hold the seal. We're lucky to not have a giant fox tearing apart my cute little home. I just BOUGHT this place, Sakumo," he complained.

"I know. I just - I didn't know what to do!" Sakumo harshly wiped at the tears that started to fall.

Orochimaru sniffed but politely looked away while running a diagnostic on the bartender. Sakumo hadn't cried when his older brother had died: not in front of anyone, anyway. People reacted differently to children, however, which was always interesting to him. "We need to get her to the hospital."

"What?! Wh- why - and we can't take her there: it's right beside the Tower!"

"You don't think I know that?" Orochimaru asked crossly. He put a blanket over the bartender and picked her up. "Let's go." He disappeared with her in a sunshin.

"What the HELL happened?" Tsunade screamed as she stomped down the maternity ward corridor. Kushina was following closely (and anxiously) behind her, wringing her hands as she kept up.

Kakashi woke up and really began whimpering for the first time.

"Good Lord! Is that… Ooooh," the pregnant kunoichi cooed at the newborn in the blue baby blanket as Sakumo struggled to calm him. "He looks like a ghost: just like you but with whisker marks! …Where's my other godchild? And why isn't this one in the newborn nursery?!"

"Maa… I couldn't – I couldn't sunshin a newborn, right?" Sakumo asked, finally beginning to fully freak out, out loud. "He - puppy was born at Orochimaru's… Orochi picked up Natty and sunshinned her here - I had to hope she was here - and Sandaime-sama's in there with them now," he continued rambling while pseudo-rocking his son faster and faster.

Tsunade tried to take the newborn, but Sakumo wasn't giving him up. He growled at her, holding his pup to his chest and away from her, knowing that even as testy and nasty as Tsunade was these days, she wouldn't swat a man holding a baby. Orochimaru stepped out of the operating room within minutes and they could see the Hokage grinning from ear to ear as he gazed down at the new mother and babe behind him.

"Congratulations, Sakumo," Orochimaru said with a satisfied smirk. "You're the father of a pink-haired girl."

"Pink?" Sakumo muttered in a whisper without realizing it. "She's okay? THEY'RE okay?"

"Naturally."

The Sandaime was cooing over his daughter, whom Natsumi was holding. "The seal showed itself, but didn't budge," he said cheerily. "Congratulations - but I must be getting back to my own little monkey and avoiding work, of course." Hiruzen sunshinned out of the room before anyone could reply or stop him.

Natsumi only had eyes for her daughter until Sakumo slowly walked in holding their son. "Hey," she said in an exhausted, small voice. She didn't begin crying until Sakumo did: seeing him so emotional in front of other people made everything suddenly snap into reality for her. She reached for her son and shook her head fondly - to say the least - as she tried to take him from her husband. Holding two babies at once after that surgery was difficult or at least awkward. They were so tiny and helpless! "Can you help me, Tsunade?"

It was pretty obvious to her that Sakumo didn't know what he was doing as he moved back and forth, trying to figure out how to transfer a baby safely.

"Of course," Tsunade cooed, surprising Natsumi, but the very pregnant kunoichi couldn't bend down enough.

Tsunade was nearly as huge as Natsumi had been, and Natsumi's bed was really low.

"Damn."

"I'll do it," Kushina chirped, bouncing up and over to the couple. Scowling at the adults who asked her to be careful, the newly-minted chibi Genin informed them of all the babies she'd held before she began to sniffle. Once she helped an awestruck Natsumi and her old man husband get the babies in the right position - she hadn't had to do much - she ran to the corner and sobbed into it.

Kushina desperately missed her big family in Uzushio. How could they leave her in this? No: she still had a family! It was gonna be okay.

Tsunade moved to hold her, and Natsumi went so far as to attempt to make a shadow clone to do the same - but got scolded by the "old man" and Orochimaru.

"What are you thinking?" Orochimaru hissed to the bartender. "You just experienced rapid labor, bore one child, and had an emergency cesarean, Fool! No shadow clones until I say!"

"Yes, sir. Sorry," Natsumi pouted lamely. She once again couldn't believe that she had to listen to Orochimaru, of all people, although her eyes were directed at her very pale children. That was when the twins started rooting around. "Oh God," she whimpered. Oh, how she had dreaded even the idea of this!

Sakumo leaned over and kissed her forehead again but untied the gown she'd been changed into, making her squeak, duck, and cover herself with their pups. "Calm down: it's natural," he whispered soothingly. "You sure you don't want to name her Sakura or something? Her hair really resembles sakura blossoms."

"No way," Nasumi replied adamantly, hoping that her daughter's hair just looked pink in the light, and really wasn't! No matter how (eventually) skilled, she hadn't been fond of Haruno Sakura by a long shot: she was always so mean to her brother.

Natsumi had been tossing the names "Akua" and "Akane" around for her little girl (as long as she wasn't born first,) but those weren't going to work now. "You'll stay with them, right?"

"I promised, didn't I, Natty? I'll keep a careful eye on our pups."

Jiraiya skidded into the room, Minato following, panting, right behind him. Natsumi hid her chest as much as she could. "WHAT DID I MISS?!"

"Get the fuck out of here, Jiraiya!"

"Language," Natsumi scolded, "there are children here!" She looked up to see Jiraiya absolutely gushing and bouncing up and down as he ignored everyone but Sakumo since he was turning him away from her. The Toad Sage didn't pay a lick of attention to his poor student who had moved into the corner opposite Kushina and had begun crying, too. Natsumi broke into big, fat, ugly tears - her parents were unknowingly here with her! - and that's when the babies started crying in earnest.

The couple brought the babies home three days later. Togo nearly came apart at the seams with excitement. The husky was good with the babies: just sniffing at them and watching them carefully. He was all over Natsumi, though.

Some kind of festival was going on, which meant that the Academy was out, so Natsumi and Sakumo were also watching Shizune because Tsunade had been hospitalized. The Slug Sannin was alright (but very angry) and on bed rest for the remainder of her pregnancy. Since Shizune "got to be there" as Kushina put it, she and Minato demanded to stay with them, too - and that apparently meant that the couple needed Jiraiya there to keep the kids in line.

Aside from Jiraiya's occasional silly comments, it was chaotic but wonderful, Natsumi thought. If only Naruto were here…

Kashi-chan was staring at her as his sister slept. Both of them had blue eyes that matched Natsumi's own - and Minato's: something the boy was incredibly (even uncharacteristically boastfully) proud of - and Natsumi didn't think she had ever been so relieved in her life as she was when he first opened them. Other than the color of his eyes and tiny whisker marks, Kakashi was a newborn clone of his father.

She wasn't allowing herself to consider that babies' eyes often changed color as time moved passed - as Kakashi's would.

"You are so cute," Natsumi grinned as she wiggled her finger. Kakashi was clutching it and pulling it to his mouth. "But you are such a piglet!" He yawned - his little baby mouth opening wide - and Natsumi brought him even closer to her, giving him soft kisses. Kakashi's hair was silver, alright. He had a lot of it and it all stood straight up in the air. She couldn't believe that she'd wondered if she'd be able to love him.

She was totally in love with her kits. "Pups," she reminded herself.

"I don't know about that, but you did alright, kit."

"Thank you, Kurama." She'd only opened the seal up again this morning. "You're the greatest."

"Psst!"

Natsumi raised an eyebrow at Jiraiya, who was giving her an exaggerated pervy grin as his eyes darted between the kids. Minato was reading to Shizune, embellishing a story that she loved. On the other side of the room sat Kushina - who was looking at Minato as if she'd never seen him before and blushing! "Kawaii!"

"Shh, shh, shh," Jiraiya insisted, waving his arms around dramatically and nearly spoiling the mood. He was satisfied with the way Natsumi's expression conveyed that she agreed with him - and more than satisfied that his kawaii student was obviously a budding, handsome little ladies' man!

Natsumi's expression turned to annoyance with a look that said she'd read his mind. What was her problem with him? Ah, it didn't matter! Jiraiya knew that he would worm his way into her cold-to-him heart! – In a friendly manner of course: he wasn't going anywhere near Sakumo's primary pack or whatever his friend called his little family, that was for sure.

Natsumi moved Kakashi into the bassinet where Ichika was sleeping, but it was too late. The two only slept well together, curled around each other. She pulled her daughter out and into her arms, ready to change and feed her again. She shot a look at Jiraiya, who had once again averted his eyes, then got up to go talk to Kushina. Maybe he's not so bad after all. "Alright, Ichika-chan: I guess it's your turn." She couldn't wait until she could use shadow clones again.

"Sakumo told you about the teeth, right?" Jiraiya asked, still with his back turned toward her.

"Teeth? Are you asking me?" Natsumi winced when her daughter latched onto her. Nursing was painful and anything but natural, she thought. At least right now (she silently prayed it would get better.)

She'd recently been convinced that all things people called "natural" were absolutely dreadful, though.

"Yeah! Hatakes are like Inuzukas. Their fangs come in early," Jiraiya explained.

"Do what now?" Natsumi asked after a beat, her eyes nearly popping out of her head as she looked at her perfect little daughter with some degree of dread. "If you're joking, that isn't funny!"

"No, I'm serious," Jiraiya insisted. "I had a feeling that bum wouldn't have told you!"

Natsumi sat and stewed, suddenly determined to wake her husband up as soon as Ichika was done and kick his ass. "How early is early? And thank God for formula, am I right?"

"What's 'formula?'" Jiraiya asked, turning around and looking at her quizzically. He looked down and ended up surprising Natsumi when he didn't give her some kind of lecherous look. No, it had already become quite clear that Jiraiya ADORED babies. Natsumi realized all of that later, though, because she was rapidly paling as her heart began to pound in her chest.

I'm in a time where there's no such thing as baby formula!? She knew that she'd seen babies being fed by bottles, but had they only had breast milk in them?! … When my husband has FANGS that he'll probably pass down to my babies?

Naruto: you big sack of crap! I can't believe you sent me to the Dark Ages.

– Well, she supposed it wasn't necessarily his fault that she fell in love and got busy with Sakumo.

Kakashi-chan let out a little sneeze, which was adorable.

And wasn't it (weirdly) perfect timing, then, when Minato allowed Orochimaru back into their home? The snake Sannin informed them that Tsunade had been overdoing it and that as soon as Dan was back from his mission, her labor would be induced.

"Orochimaru-san," Natsumi eventually said, "you're a chemist, right?"

He sat down and took the tea Minato brought him, giving the Uzushio kunoichi a once-over. "I am a shinobi of many talents."

"Yeah, well I'm a kunoichi bartender. How'd you like to go in with me and make a substitute 'drink' for mother's milk?" Both he and Jiraiya look scandalized, whereas her chibi father looked interested, thankfully, which encouraged her to go on. "There are MANY mothers who can't feed their infants, am I right? Many babies that… I don't know," she said: it was so hard to imagine. When had formula been invented?! Surely it was in the making by some bright soul even now, surely. BUT… "It would have to be something that provided the exact nutrients that are in breastmilk - and preferably taste like it, too."

"A partnership," Orochimaru whispered, rapidly considering it. "Very well."

"You've gotta be kiddin' me! What about wet nurses?" Jiraiya asked.

Natsumi's face screwed up. "Is that a job?!"

"Of course, it's a job! Parents pay big time for that!" Orochimaru was the one to thoughtfully reply to Jiraiya, however.

"But think of those that can't afford it or don't have families to aid them, Jiraiya," Orochimaru scolded. "Hmph! When I become Hokage, I'll ensure that the fees for wet nurses are subsidized, at the very least." Natsumi blinked at him owlishly: something she often did when he spoke, which he found odd. He narrowed his eyes at Natsumi and told her what he'd need. "You will provide the necessary samples for me to analyze."

Natsumi's mouth fell open. Oh, fuck: what had she done?!

The sunset-haired new mother woke up the next morning after getting the first of any real rest - in two-hour spurts - since a few nights before she had the twins (when she had apparently been in labor. It seemed she had a very high tolerance for pain.) "Morning," she said to her equally tired husband, sitting up as quickly as she realized what was happening. "Why are you in your gear?" Sakumo was ANBU-ed out, aside from his mask, which was in his hand.

"Emergency, sweetheart," Sakumo said, looking grim.

"Is everything alright?"

Sakumo's posture was stiff, but he leaned over and kissed her desperately before clutching her into a fierce hug. He didn't answer Natsumi's question, which probably said a lot, and then very lightly kissed his sleeping puppies. "Togo, you stay here with Natsu. The boys will be outside," he ordered the husky. "The boys" always meant his wolves. "I have to run."

"Sake?" Natsumi begged weakly, feeling something dreadful turning in her gut. Sakumo came back twice, carrying a sleeping Shizune and then a fitful Kushina to tuck into bed with her.

"I love you," he sighed and took a lingering gaze at his precious pack, also giving the two young girls who were quickly becoming a part of it a fond look. "Do NOT leave this room: any of you." Natsumi nodded and he was gone.

Natsumi got up and put her gear on as quickly as she could (which wasn't very fast) - or all of it that would fit, anyway - before asking Kushina to do the same with what she had in the room. She gave the girl a pair of leggings she used to wear that fit little Kushina like too-long pants, which the little redhead rolled up and tucked her nightie in. Fortunately, their closet was also filled with weapons. (As was underneath the bed, behind the headboard and pictures, in every single drawer…)

"What's happened?" Kushina asked, unusually serious.

"I don't know. Sakumo ordered us to stay in this room, okay?" Natsumi pressed her lips together before brushing Shizune's soft hair out of her face while she slept. She took a deep breath and pulled the basket of the bassinet the twins were currently sharing onto the bed, right next to Tsunade and Dan's niece.

Fuck. She was still SO tired.

Kushina nodded, knowing that Natsumi-nee-chan's old man was weird, and when he ordered something, he MEANT it. "Umm… I have to go to the bathroom."

Natsumi bit back a grimace but quickly nodded. Her chemistry and chakra were still so off, that she couldn't sense anything. The bedroom, fortunately, had an ensuite.

Kushina wound up being in there for too long, though, in Natsumi's opinion. "Kushina-chan! Can you please come out here; you're making me nervous."

Kushina yelled "Sorry" just as an explosion rocked the house and Togo flew toward her.

Natsumi jumped back at the same time, covering the babies and Shizune with her body. Her hearing was off, but it was obvious that the babies were screaming. Shizune was shaking and holding onto Natsumi's top and hair tightly.

Blood. She smelled blood!

The only thing Natsumi could really hear was a high-pitched roar. She quickly turned, grabbed her weapons at the same time, and gasped. "Iwa." The bastard who'd broken in even had an Iwa headband and gear on!

"Come with us and you won't get hurt," the Iwa shinobi said.

Kushina busted into the room and threw a nearly Tsunade-worthy chakra-infused punch at the man. "GET AWAY FROM MY FAMILY!" Thick, golden chains went right through the enemy as they rose into the air, all the way to the ceiling, wrapping around them in a small barrier. More enemy shinobi came in but couldn't get through. Kushina was sobbing - and screaming out something - but Natsumi wasn't at the right angle to be able to lip-read the threats she had to be making.

The enemy shinobi were at first freaking out but Kushina's chains began to falter: making their expressions change entirely. It looked like they'd decided to gleefully wait for them to fall. Natsumi quickly scooted in front of her chibi-mother, her own smaller chains wrapping around the little redheads to reinforce them. They all jumped when Sakumo and Jiraiya arrived in blinding white light, attacking like madmen and tearing through the enemies.

Natsumi twisted so she could cover the girls' eyes. "It's okay! It's okay," she kept repeating, quickly feeling completely exhausted and sick. "Babies," was the last word she got out before she slumped on top of them and her unconscious ninken.

She woke up hours later in the hospital and panicked at seeing Sakumo silently weeping beside her. "No," she begged. "No! No, please." He grabbed her and held her to his chest as she flailed. That's when she heard the babies: both of them. She began crying for a different reason.

Relief.

Sakumo got himself together, carrying Ichika-chan over first.

Natsumi choked out another sob at seeing that her baby girl had a bandage over her head and right arm. She held her close, finally calming her down as much as possible by nursing her, just as she had to do with Kakashi-chan - who, physically, looked fine. Ichika-chan had been on the side of the bassinet that was closest to the explosion. Something must have fallen on her or... "Wh- what happened?!"

"We had a mole in the ranks. …It's September 20th," Sakumo said gravely. He climbed into the hospital bed behind his wife and wrapped his arms around her soft but much smaller waist, laying his head on hers.

Natsumi's neck (and breasts) especially hurt, but she could hear again. Nodding stiffly, she understood. All of the planning for the twins' birth… Their birth was supposed to take place this very morning. "Someone knew and got the word out."

They either came for the jinchuuriki or to get an Uzumaki, she guessed. Or an Uzumaki-Hatake, she thought with a shudder.

"We're not sure if they're really Iwa or not, but we'll find out: mark my words." It took Sakuno a bit to tell her the rest. "I lost some of my pack, and… Orochimaru's in critical condition."