Once again, the environmental controls on the ship were malfunctioning, resulting in several decks experiencing cold rainy weather. As a result, Ms. Kelsey shivered when she arrived at Troi's office.
She immediately offered the therapist two apples and some flavored water. Then began to eat her apple. Deanna apologized for missing last week's session as she'd been ill.
Ms. Kelsey immediately got to the point of what she wished to talk about. She began to explain how she frequently self-sabotaged herself when trying to lose weight. She confessed the primary source was rooted in how her father treated her as a teenager. His verbal abuses constantly made her feel like she deserved to be punished.
That she never be pretty or able to accomplish any goal. How he'd degraded it so often about her weight. Even claiming she does better with diet pills. He used her stepsister as a comparison.
Ms. Kelsey admitted that while she'd had no contact with her father, the years she suffered under his household being abused daily had taken awayher self-confidenced.
She openly admitted she lacked self-confidence in how her entire family had treated her. Or how they still couldn't acknowledge their toxic behavior. Whether it was in the past of present, it continued to take a toll on her.
Deanna questioned if she'd done anything to attempt to rid her mind of the past trauma. Again, Ms. Kelsey acknowledged she cut contact with her father while limiting her contact with her twin sister.
Yet, she still felt ugly and that she never amount to anything. She revealed her father also never acknowledged her accomplishments. He only degraded her as he told her reading and writing were a waste of time. Despite this was where her talents lay.
She also explained she felt others weren't listening to her at all. She felt she was the only one doing any work in a futile attempt to repair relationships. Deanna agreed the first step in fixing a relationship was acknowledging your shortcomings. Then listen to what the other person says about how your behavior affects them.
She gently reminded her she had the power to choose whether a person's words and actions held any power over her. Ms. Kelsey explained she felt powerless. And no matter how many years passed, the pain never disappeared.
She asked if Deanna had a chance to read her original story, which she still needed to. But will do it soon. Ms. Kelsey admitted she sometimes struggled with editing others' work.
She also spoke about how helping her mother keep her quarters clean no longer felt like she had to do it. Instead, she did it whenever she was angry and needed something cathartic. Or if her mother gave her the okay.
Either way, she felt good about helping her mother. Even if, in the past, others had taken advantage of her kindhearted and generous nature. They spent a little time looking at the sketches she'd finished before ending the session. They hoped next week would prove successful as well.