Hina of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
Chapter 4
Escape from Pelecostos Island
The sun glared down as a rowboat made its way across the water, the two passengers inside anxious. One was young teen, with slicked back black hair, goggles over his eyes, an olive green jumpsuit and mechanical devices on his wrists, ankles and the top of his head. The second was the boy's height but was much older, had glasses, his right eye made of wood, a nearly bald head, a lab outfit and was reading a Catholic Bible. Respectively, they were Drill Bit and Calvin.
Calvin looked up from his book to Drill Bit who was paddling the oars. "Well I still say that it was some form of divine intervention that escaped us from that prison."
"And I still say that it was me being clever," Drill Bit spat before turning his head to something on the boat's edge. "Ain't that right little mongrel?" he asked of the guard turtle, keys still in its mouth.
"Well how are you so sure that it wasn't a divine intervention that made you clever?" Calvin persisted. "Besides, I'm not stealing any ship."
"sigh, For the last time, we're not stealing anything. We're just salvaging a ship. And since when did you care so much?"
"Since we became immortal no longer," Calvin answered as he pointed to the bible. "Because of that, we'll have to take care of our immortal souls!"
Drill Bit stopped rowing as he stared at his companion. "You know you're an atheist."
"It's the bible. You get credit for trying," Calvin replied with a glare.
"Reading the bible when you're not a Christian is a lie!" Drill Bit spoke as he pulled that last fact out of his butt. "That alone is a mark against God!"
Calvin shut the book and was about to ram his fist into the child's face when the turtle mewed with a flipper pointing at the shore before them.
Drill Bit turned with an angry face, only to have that face be replaced by a look of happiness. "There it is!" he gasped as they looked at the Black Tama sitting on the shore. The turtle then leaped off into a flight, leaving the comrades to themselves.
"What's got into him?" Calvin spoke.
"Probably saw a Su-fish," Drill Bit replied with a smirk.
Calvin thought this a bit, wondering why it was funny until it clicked. Love Hina. Kaolla Su. Tama-chan. He laughed as he looked to the turtle. "Stupid reptile!" he called out. Then both members stopped laughing as they realized that they were coming to the shores too fast. The wave they rode on then picked them to the shore where the resulting surf knocked them out of the boat and into the water while the perfectly dry turtle just went on over to a tree stump to rest. Maybe this is why that Wookie wouldn't go earlier.
Shortly the two were clamoring out of the waters and laughing happily as the came to the ship.
"It's ours for the taking!" Drill Bit spoke happily.
"The tide's coming in soon, we better get to de-anchoring it," Calvin spoke causing Drill Bit to stare. "Well salvaging is a form of saving when you look at it like that!"
"Heh. No argument here," Drill Bit said.
They both were about to get to work when the sounds of drums echoed throughout the island. It could only be taken as a bad sign.
"I guess that we better save it as soon as we can since our souls are in so much danger now," Calvin concluded.
"Amen to that," Drill Bit said as he made the sign of the cross on himself before rushing to work. Calvin stared at him.
"I thought you were Buddhist?"
The islanders pounded their drums, dancing about as they performed their ritual. Adding pieces of wood to a growing pile in the middle of the area, two other islanders came up to Alias and latched a necklace around his neck before going back into the crowd.
"Uh, thank ya," he said hesitantly as he lifted one of the many toes that were attached on the necklace to his face. His head tilted to the side a bit before biting a piece of toenail off. He immediately became disgusted and spat it out and made a mental note to take some kind of medicine later.
Finally, we turn our attention to a canyon. It was connected by a rope bridge for travel, and two sphere cages hanged with prisoners inside. One had six Dusk nobodies in it, and in the other were the actual members of the crew. … Plus Keitaro.
"I don't get it," Keitaro said softly as he rested against the cage wall.
"Don't get what Keitaro?" Su said, standing by to answer his question.
"Well, two things actually," Keitaro said. "First off, why did Alias trap us here if these islanders made him their chief?"
"Well that's the thing," Su said. "These freaks called the Pelecostos made Alias their chief. But like any ruling, he'll only stay chief if he acts like a chief."
"So he has no choice," Keitaro spoke as he looked to the sky. "He's just as much a prisoner as we are."
"Actually he's in a worse position," Su said with noticeable worry. "These guys think that Alias is a god in human form, which really isn't that far from the truth here. So they want to release him from his mortal prison."
Keitaro stared hard at that confusion until he felt a tug at his leg. He looked down to see Mini-me making to notion to watch him. He then jumped up a bit Naruto on the arm. Said blonde shouted angrily before beginning to fight. As the classic anime cloud went on, Keitaro turned back to Su in realization. They were going to eat Alias. Then he thought of something else.
"Where's the rest of the crew?" he asked, dreading the answer.
"Just a bunch of Nobodies like those guys in the other cage," Su reassured with a pointing finger. "As for what happened to them, let's just say that these cages weren't built till after we got here."
Keitaro backed off from the wall in shock. No wonder that one bar looked like a spine.
"So what was your second question Keitaro?" Su asked off handedly.
"Well, I just want to know but… what's holding this cage up?" Keitaro asked as he looked back to the sky to see that both ropes holding the cages just disappeared into the clouds. "I mean, here our cages are being hanged by ropes, but their not even attached to the bridge! So what's holding them up?"
The camera view zooms up beyond the clouds to see a white midget with no arms, a bowler cap and a blue shirt that says 'homsar' floating upside down.
Keitaro sighed as he leaned back on the cage wall. "So," he asked, "how much longer do we have before they start to eat Alias?"
"They'll make an Alias-shish kabob out of him over a roaring fire when the drums stop beating," Su said, worried once more.
Keitaro had a thinking face on as he began to note the state of the cages. "Then we don't have much time, do we?"
Back the throne area, for a lack of better words; they were adding final and smaller pieces of wood to the pile. Alias then tensed a bit before putting a plan into effect.
"Oi oi! Aye, oi!" he shouted, stopping the native placing the wood. "Big fire! Big fire!" he said with emphasis by his arms. "I am the chief, and I want a big fire! You two! Maboogie snickle snickle!" he commanded to two others. "Toute suite! Come on!"
The islanders quickly ran off gathering larger pieces of wood. They turned back to gather more wood, only for everything to stop as they noticed their chief's absence.
Alias ran through the mostly empty village, already slight of breath. Scrambling for anything of inspiration, he constantly checked behind his back just in case. He then stopped, teetering over the edge of a cliff before straightening himself. The drop below was easily over 100 feet. No way was he going to risk jumping. He looked about before his face lit up. There were long bamboo poles that the islanders used to carry numerous or heavy things. He began to lift one, guessing that it was sturdy enough to use as a pole vault to get to the other side of the chasm. He then realized what he was thinking and just dropped the pole.
He went through a nearby hut, looking for anything that could help. He face lit up as he saw a lengthy rope. He grabbed the coiled string, hanging it on his right shoulder. He was about to leave before something caught his eye. He looked to see a small basket filled with random things from anyone unfortunate enough to land at the island. But one of the things was a glass bottle with a rubber cork with an also rubber onion on top. He pulled it our to see that it was a small spice bottle, the label obviously suggesting that it was from a time not fitting for this world. He then looked closer at the supplier logo. FFA. Fanfiction Association. So they were here in this world too. He tucked it into his pocket and exited the hut, only to stop and say a single sentence.
"Oh pfargtl."
There before him stood practically the entire village. Alias smiled nervously as he tossed the rope to the ground and pulled out the onion bottle. He unplugged it and started to sprinkle onion bits all about him, some even getting stuck in his curly hair.
"Seasoning," he said simply to them.
The villagers' celebration continued once more, the firewood good and ready. Then the guest of honor arrived, tied to a bamboo pole like a chicken on a spit. They rested the pole onto two wooden holsters, and Alias looks at the wood pile to see that it's now at least twice his size. Not only has his plan failed, but it made the situation worse.
"Well done gentlemen," he just had to congratulate. He knew his time has come, so he decided to replay the Perfect Kirby 3 movie from Newgrounds in his head as a final pleasure. Heh. Kool-Aid man.
"ONE, TWO, THREE!" Keitaro shouted again as the crew leaned into the other side of the cage. It swung across the canyon and close to the plant covered cliff wall, but stopped just arm's reach away from the already reaching crew. Both cages swung back, and then forward once more, the nobodies in the second cage doing the same. The came close enough to grasp the foliage, but it was too weak. They swung one more time, this time all of them grabbing on durable vines.
"Alright everybody!" Su shouted. "Make like a monkey and climb."
"We better hurry," Keitaro added as both teams already made their long way up. "After all, it'll take all of us to crew the Tama."
"Ah, not really" Su said offhandedly. "You only need six."
With this, both cages froze. One cage had Su, Keitaro, Mini-me, Naruto, Ginta and Babbo. The other had six Dusk nobodies. Keitaro looked at Su, asking an inaudible question. Su just shrugged her shoulders in a 'why not?' fashion. Both cages then quickened their pace.
Keitaro looked at the other team before noticing a teen native crossing the bridge. He shushed his team as he pointed out the native. He then silently caught the Nobodies' attention, also pointing out the native. They stood frozen for a moment before one Dusk brought his team to attention. He then did a shush action before pointing to the top. The Nobodies then quietly climbed forward. Keitaro's team immediately motioned them to stop, but they didn't listen. One Dusk then grabbed a vine that came loose and began to hiss. The Dusk looked at it and saw that he grabbed a snake! It panicked which caused the others to panic and let go. The instant action caught the native's attention who gasped in surprise. At the top, Homsar watched this and also called in surprise. He then noticed that he let go of the ropes and quickly chomped onto one. The other one, along with the cage of Nobodies, dropped to the endless chasm below.
All the others gaped at the fate, well knowing that could easily become theirs. They looked to the native who also noticed them. The boy then ran away. That instantly spelled trouble.
"MOVE!" Keitaro yelled to his team.
A male native ran into the throne area, a lit torch in his hand like an Olympic runner.
"Aaaah! Fie Fie!" he cried which was echoed by the rest.
He lowered the torch as Alias prayed, until the same male teen native came shouting causing all to stop.
"La lae tu go! La lae tu quo! Haevae kaka sae sae?"
Everyone turned to Alias for the answer. Mentally, Alias thanked Keitaro for giving him another chance.
"Well? What are ya waitin' for? Get 'im! Pae lala!"
The crowed echoed that and gave chase. Alias relaxed a bit until he noticed that the torch bearer dropped the fire and it was already lighting the very edge of the wood pile.
"Whoa whoa wait a minute! Wait a minute! Guys? Guys? A little bit of help here? Oi!" but the natives just went on. Alias looked back down to the starting fire. "Oh, fudgecicle."
He blew on the fire a bit, trying to put it out. But it only carried some lit ashes deeper into the pile and kindled the blaze to grow.
"Oh dear."
Blowblowblowblowblowblowblowblow.
The crew hauled onto the top of the cliff, understandably exhausted.
"Find a rock!" Keitaro shouted. "Cut the rope!" He then noticed something in the air. "Never mind."
They all looked in surprise to see the top of the rope fall from the sky. In the air, Homsar watched as he let go of the rope.
"Now that's just the luck of the penguin," he wailed before disappearing with a pop.
Back on ground, Keitaro then noticed something else. A large group of armed and angry natives, howling for the hunt.
"ROLL THE CAGE!" he shouted as he began to do so.
The entire group of them began to pick up momentum, slowly distancing themselves from the natives. They didn't even see the edge of the hill before it was too late. Now rolling out of control, they made great distance from the army. All of them were screaming, holding on to the walls for dear life. The ride continued until the cage ran up a slanted tree a bit and fell to the ground. They all were catching their breath from the experience.
"WOOHOO!" Su screamed as she jumped up in recovery. "That was so much fun! Let's do that again!"
Keitaro quickly clamped his hand over her mouth. "Let's… not" he said shakily. "Hurry everybody! This isn't over yet! Lift the cage like a skirt and carry it!"
"You'd know, wouldn't ya?" Su teased.
Nonetheless, she along with the others placed their legs through a hole in the cage and lifted it like a dress. Unfortunately for Mini-me though because of his size, he ended up having to ride a bone of the cage in pain as it came up way too fast for his jewel's liking. They continued to go until they suddenly skidded to a halt at a cliff edge. Below them was a chasm with a deep river at the bottom.
"Oh great," Naruto whined. "Now what do we do?"
He was then hit by a flying rock, causing him to crash into the others and forcing them to fall into the river just as the natives arrived. Up in the sky, Homsar saw the effects of the stone he tossed.
"I had to save them from Davy Jones's disco," he wailed to the readers before disappearing once again.
While all this was happening, another escape attempt was occurring. Alias was now bouncing the pole up and down as the flames continued to grow. Soon he bounced so high that the pole came off of the holsters. He struggled a bit until his legs burst from the ropes. He got onto his feet and began to run away in case any native decided to come back.
He soon came to the same cluster of huts as before and tried to tear apart the ropes binding his chest. He then got a feeling and turned his head to see a male child native holding a knife and fork and a curious glance. Alias smiled as he got to the boy and grabbed the knife, the boy then running away in shock. Alias then tried to cut the ropes before he got the feeling again. He turned to see two portly female natives preparing fruit, the cliffside behind them.
They stared at each other for a split second before Alias screamed in panic and ran towards them. They stepped out of the way and Alias ran for the cliffside. He then leaned forward to plunge the pole into the ground, only to get it stuck in a pile of coconuts. He glared a bit before his face softened in realization. He then quickly turned, flinging the coconut at the women. But there were two problems. 1: one of them caught it. 2: they both were royally ticked off.
Back with Keitaro's team, they surfaced the water, the crash breaking the cage open. They quickly went to the far side of the chasm, swimming left and right to dodge the spears and arrows.
Alias swung left and right, trying not to get hit by the various fruit thrown at him by the ladies.
Keitaro kept dodging the weapons, cursing Alias in his mind. A spear then came so close that it grazed his cheek.
Alias kept knocking away or dodging the fruit until one got speared and slowed to his face. Oh great. He hated papaya.
Ginta broke the water surface again for a breath, only to have five spears launched at him. Time seemed to slow as he dodged each one like he was in the Matrix.
More and more fruit came speared onto the pole until Alias was just ticked.
"STOOOOOOOOOP!"
The women did so in shock at the sudden anger while Alias looked at what he was now. He was now a pre-cooked Alias-kabob, complete with melons, papayas, cantaloupes and even a honey-roasted ham.
The crew gasped, now completely tired. They were in plain sight and were about to be killed.
"Wait a minute!" Babbo gasped while being held up by Su, "Where's Ginta?"
They looked to where Ginta was and sweatdropped. Ginta was nearby, still dodging even more spears Matrix-style. Neo, eat your heart out. The group sighed and accepted their fate as the natives prepared the next shots that won't miss. That's when the same male boy native came.
"Oto! Da ne nuto! Da ae nuto!"
All the villagers gasped and immediately left to chase their 'chief'. As for the crew, they just floated there confused.
"Ok," Keitaro gasped. "That'll work for me. Somebody get that kid back to normal and let's get to the Tama."
Alias screamed again as he charged, the women stepping aside again. Alias then thrusted the pole back into the ground, this time hitting just where the ground and the stone boundary met. He 'whee!'-ed a bit as he flipped through the air, landing perfectly onto the ground at the other side of the chasm. Alias saw this and laughed hoarsely at his luck. That was until both groups of fruit (and the ham) slid to the ground end as much as possible, causing Alias to whimper as the weight shift tipped him backwards into the chasm. He screamed until the pole horizontally scraped the sides of the chasm until they stuck, the whiplash causing Alias's bindings to snap and releasing him like a yo-yo until he was now hanging upside down, dangling by his snagged foot.
"A nifnif," one woman noted as they looked at the escapade.
"A boogie," the other agreed as they both left.
Alias looked up from his current position, just in time to see that one end of the pole was about to lose its footing. Alias let his head relax back as he prepared himself for what was about to happen.
"Fudgecicle."
The pole then let loose, Alias already was screaming. He fell through the chasm, occasionally busting through a rope bridge (saying 'ow' everytime mind you,) and one bridge even snagged the first fruit as the pole went on, causing all the ingredients to slide off of the pole and then off of the bridge. Alias continued to fall until he finally hit the ground, back first and hard. As Alias gathered his bearings, he noticed that the pole was coming quick, a pointed side first. He didn't even have time to scream until he turned his head to see the pole now sticking out straight from the ground. He looked back to the sky in time to see the fruits and the ham landing as well, scattering about him. He was sore, the villagers were going to find him, and he looked like a fool. IT'S ROOT BEER TIME!
The crew and Keitaro were now on the home stretch to the Tama just as the tide was coming in. Drill Bit was trying to loosen the ropes that tied the ship down while shouting to Calvin on the ship.
"Undo the mooring line!" he sputtered as another crashing wave hit him. "The mooring line!"
Calvin was in a bit of a spot though. He met Alias-tama again who was playing the classic game of keep away with Calvin's wooden eye.
"Give it back you undead reptilian thief!" he shouted from the ground as the turtle landed on the ship's edge, the eye in flipper. He then lifted it to his small mouth and began to gnaw on it. "No no no! Don't bite it!"
"Calvin!" Drill Bit shouted. "Give me some help here!"
Calvin leaned onto the edge beside Alias-tama to look at his comrade. "It's Alias-tama! He's got my eye and he's not giving it back!"
"Well how did you get back the last time?" the irritated child shouted back.
"Way to go Drill Bit! The job's half done!" Su shouted as the crew arrived, shocking the child.
"We did it for you knowing you'd come back!" Drill Bit lied on the spot.
"Doesn't matter!" she shouted with a smile as the others began to board. "Let's go everyone! Get ready to make sail!"
"Wait!" Keitaro shouted to Su. "What about Alias? We can't just leave him behind!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" a girly voice shouted.
Keitaro looked to the other end of the beach and smiled at the sight of the Unknown Alias sprinting out of the jungle (with a honey glazed ham in hand?) and making his way to the boat. With the entire village populace making chase. Keitaro immediately made a grimace once he saw the said crowd.
"Never mind! Let's go!" he shouted as he began to hoist himself onto the ship.
"CAST OFF THE LINES!" Su shouted as the crew already taking care of the job.
Alias saw this and sprinted even harder. He then noticed ahead was the guard turtle who was lying on a miniature lawn chair and working on its tan. It then lowered its sunglasses noting the passing group.
"GOOD TURTLE!" Alias shouted as he passed. The turtle stared before putting back its sunglasses.
"WAIT FOR MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" the boy author shouted as the ship was already backing off of the shore. He continued to run, making sure to pick up his feet as he began to run in the surf. He then leaped and grabbed a side ladder that was lowered by Su. The islanders could go no further in fear that the vessel for the 'god' would cause them to die. So they continued to plea in their language as Alias hanged by his left hand and foot for his exit, the right hand still holding the ham.
"Ladies and gentlemen, this shall be they that you'll all remember as the day that you almost-" it was then he was hit by a big wave, washing off practically all of his face painting. He spewed water out of his mouth like a fountain as the enthusiasm of his statement died. "infamous captain Unknown Alias."
The islanders could only stand there as Alias climbed up the ladder to his ship. They then heard laughter like mews. They turned to see that the turtle was laughing. It then stopped long enough to see that they were all staring at itself. It gulped before flying off into the jungle, the villagers following this new 'god'.
The crew was already bustling with activity as the ship made its way out. Alias then hoisted his self onto deck, immediately covered with a blanket by Drill Bit and Calvin.
"Captain," Su called as she came up to him, "I don't know about you but I don't wanna play here anymore. How about we leave this place for good and head out to open sea?"
"Yes to the first and yes to the second but only if we as much to the shallows as possible. As for you two," Alias shouted to Drill Bit and Calvin who cringed at their former captain, "welcome back aboard." They sighed in relief.
"But captain, doesn't that kinda cancel each other out?" Su insisted.
"Su, I have full trust in your navigational abilities. Now where is that turtle? I have to shoot something!"
That's when Calvin's wooden eye was spat out onto the deck, Alias smiling at the undead turtle above him. While Calvin recovered his and gave it a spit shine, Alias drew his pistol as Keitaro came up.
"Alias."
"Aye?"
"I need your help again. Naru is in danger."
Alias sighed as he went to the top most part of deck where Su was already at the wheel. "Yeah, you kinda told me already. Have you thought about keeping a closer eye on her? Maybe just lock her up some place?"
"She is locked up!" Keiatro shouted exasperatedly. "In a prison sentenced to die along with me and Su for having helped you!"
"Well there does come a time where one must take responsibility for their actions."
Keiatro then grabbed a sword from the ground and held the blade to Alias's neck that turned to face him.
"I just need that compass Alias. I have to trade it in for our freedom."
Alias seemed to contemplate until he lifted the blade to the other side of his neck and went to Su's side.
"Kaolla," he addressed seriously. "We have a need to travel upriver."
Su's eyes widened as she realized what that meant. "Ah, by need do you mean a second tier need like seeing a movie for the 5th time?"
"Ahh, nooo. And need like being the first to the store so as to claim all the good bananas."
Su cringed as she realized how important this was and began to redirect the ship.
"What we need is for Alias to get back to my home world so he can do negotiations," Keitaro said angrily.
Alias sighed in exasperation before digging into his pockets. "Keitaro Urashima, I shall assist you within the negotiations for the resolution of you, Su and Naru and even throw in the compass for free if you help me find this and what it goes to," he said as he laid out the cloth showing the illustration of the key.
Keitaro got a puzzled face as he picked up the cloth. "This. You want me to find this?"
"No," Alias said with a smirk, (he loved doing this!) "you want you to find this. For the finding of this finds you incapacitorialy in finding and/or locating a way of detecting a way in your search for a thing to help save your bonnie lass 'ol what's her name. Savvy?"
Keitaro was definitely confused, but at least he got the main message. "This is going to help save Naru?" he said as he held up the cloth.
He then motioned Keitaro to lean down as he got into a whisper. "How much do you know about a man named Davy Jones?"
"Not much," he said with a shrug.
"Then yes," he said as he took a small bite of the ham, "it'll help."
Date of Update: 07/23/2007
AN: Well there you go. Sorry for the late update, but 'things came up, things went down, but things were conquered' as mentor Alias would say. Hope this is considerably longer for the wait though. Can't wait for the response! Take care everyone.