XXII

Healing

At first, the air was extremely still. Nothing seemed to move, as if relaxing after the tremendous amount of exerted energy had finally dissipated. Everything stayed that way for quite some time, save one thing. Just ten feet above the ground, practically in the middle of nothing, the air seemed to waver slightly. The nearly invisible wavering expanded; encompassing a much greater area as time slowly crept on.

After more time, an intermittent flash of light began to strobe from the very center. At first, the flashes were a handful of seconds apart. Eventually, the flashes increased in both size and frequency. The expanding light source started leaving a slight glow behind every time the flash went out. Then, the light began to maintain itself, flashing sporadically around its edges. The energy grew, and the bright light in the center began to swirl inwards. The noise coming from this new energy grew louder.

The very center of the new vortex stopped glowing, and that too began to expand with the disc of light energy. There were warbled sounds coming from the center now, sounding much like voices. The air seemed to swirl violently from the center, and the sudden appearance of a scarred brick wall from the other side contrasted with the barren wasteland.

Zerrich's eyes had already focused on the anomaly. He was next trying to will his body to move. There was almost no success, save for the sliding of his right arm across the ground.

"…--I …-se-. -he ot-er …de! I d--'t …w how l-ng I can k--… -s thing op-n!"

"H-pe i…-oes to the r..-t place!"

"It can't g- —ywher- else! I'm open-n thi…— …up bas-d on the extr…-eadings I got after Rav-n left! It should lead -s right t— them!"

"I hope you'r- right, Cyb-rg!"

Zerrich recognized their voices, even before they began to clear up. The rest of the team was coming here. How they had managed to open a portal all by themselves…I'll have to ask them about that…

"This -s it!" Cyborg shouted. "Go! GO!"

From within the vortex, member after member began landing against the rough and dead terrain. The last one through was Cyborg, and immediately following his arrival the vortex began to collapse. It took a few moments longer before it finally dwindled into nothing. Not one of the Titans paid any more attention to it. Their shock at the wasteland around them was overpowering.

Zerrich again tried to push himself off the ground. He succeeded this time in getting his right elbow lifted up, along with sliding his leg slightly forward. He grunted and looked to the ground as he lifted the side of his body just enough. The sounds of footsteps rushing to his position made him look up again. Robin and Beast Boy were at his sides, quickly taking an arm each and lifting him to his knees. Zerrich felt slightly dizzy from the sudden motion.

"Zerrich!" Robin said first. "Are you all right? What happened?"

"Trigon?" Beast Boy asked.

Zerrich took a slow breath. "Trigon," he tested his voice. "It's over. We got him. It's all over…"

Zerrich's eyes closed from exhaustion. He didn't see the teams' reaction. There was a long pause as Zerrich opened his eyes again.

"Where's Raven?" Starfire asked. Her voice had that sound—the sound of fear. The fear of what she knew to be the answer already.

"She…she fought him," Zerrich said. "She surrounded him with…with this magic. It was huge—powerful…you could feel it from so far away. I'd never seen anything like it before. Then it shrank…with both of them inside. There was a flash…then an explosion. The blast knocked me over, sent me…I don't know how far away. I tried looking for her…but there was nothing. Nothing at all. Then, my strength left me."

"Did she teleport away?" Beast Boy asked. "Maybe she got away. Maybe you missed it."

Zerrich shook his head, slowly. "Before the explosion…I heard a scream. I heard her scream."

There was more silence. The entire team simply stood there. Zerrich place his hand on Robin's shoulder, slowly trying to hoist himself onto his feet. Robin pulled him up the rest of the way. Zerrich ignored the blotted vision caused by the sudden blood rush from his head. Slowly, he took a step forward.

"We fought over there," Zerrich pointed. "There should be a set of craters where he nearly hit us."

He could sense the team's hesitation. Zerrich had described a scenario that could only explain demise. Here he was, refusing to believe in it himself. They could read his denial as if he'd written it down on some piece of parchment for all to read.

"Titans, spread out," Robin ordered. "Search the area. Search for any clues…any trace of Raven."

The team separated immediately after. Mas and Menos sped past the group, arriving at the craters Zerrich had indicated far ahead of anyone else. They began their search at a rapid pace, but when the twins realized the dust they were kicking up in the process they slowed down. Starfire flew above the area, searching from the air. The rest of the team fanned out to look for anything they could find.

Zerrich slowly walked to the point that—at his best guess—he had been standing when Raven disappeared. He tried to use a spell to locate everyone in the area, hoping he'd be able to use it to find Raven as well. He was just short of enough strength to get it started—all of his power went into that transference.

"Guys! GUYS!" Speedy shouted from some point just ahead of Zerrich.

The team ran to Speedy's position, Zerrich hobbling along as best as he could. When he got to the group, he had to wait until Beast Boy and Cyborg parted to let him by. They both still looked to what Speedy was holding in his hand. The item looked blackened, all but one spot just off the edge. It was the color of midnight blue.

It was a part of Raven's cloak. The remains of it had been all charred, save that one little corner. The entire team looked around instinctively, but the area was otherwise barren. There was nothing else to be found.

Zerrich's strength gave out in his legs as reality finally struck him. He dropped harshly to his knees, fighting hard to keep his breath steady. There was nothing left to do. Trigon had been defeated, and it had been at a terrible cost. Many lives in Jump City perished without a second thought by the demon. Zerrich realized yet another missing face from the group, and it meant the Titans had lost a total of three of its members. It was hard for Zerrich to find comfort in knowing that Trigon would have destroyed all life on that planet beyond Jump City, as well as countless other worlds had they not stopped him. The damage had been insignificant in the grand scheme of things.

To Zerrich, to the rest of the Titans, it was significant. Significant was not even a strong enough word. Would there ever be a word to describe this kind of pain? Starfire could be heard sobbing quietly, Beast Boy's sniffles hard to ignore. Zerrich closed his eyes. There were no other noises. Not even the wind. Only the sound of their pain…

-

-

Speedy stood over the wasteland that was Azarath with the piece of cloth in his hand, the team surrounding him. He had lost two good friends, the third a good teammate. They had come here to assist in any way they could, and they had arrived only to find that they were too late. In the ultimate sense, it meant the battle was over…and for the greater good. But just as everyone else had been going through, Speedy couldn't help but feel completely empty. He was far too numb to appreciate the victory they had all fought for. The odds were terribly against them, and through some miracle they had won. It just didn't feel like a victory. Speedy felt that saying it out loud would do no good either.

"Let me…let me see it."

Speedy looked to Zerrich, the man still on his knees. He held his hand out, gesturing towards the ruined material in the palm of Speedy's hand.

"Let me see it," Zerrich persisted.

Speedy paused for a moment, not sure what Zerrich could gain from merely holding it. He slowly handed it to Zerrich anyway. The man on his knees clutched it for a moment, closing his eyes again. That slight urgency in Zerrich dissolved as the man took a deep but shuddering breath. There were a few moments before Zerrich began whispering. Speedy figured the words weren't English, though he couldn't hear enough sound to determine that for sure.

The piece of cloth began to smolder, eventually bursting into flame in Zerrich's palm. The fire must have burned at Zerrich's skin, but he didn't even flinch at it. The emerging ashes of the cloth began circling the flame from base to tip, eventually fluttering into the air and above the team. There was no wind to carry the particles, yet they seemed to float and spread out with some sort of current. The last of the cloth burnt to ash, the last particles floating upward before the flame could snuff itself out.

That was when the little black specks began to glow. Even in the orange sky, the little sparkles looked like a moving starfield. Speedy couldn't help but be moved even that little bit by the site. He was no expert in culture—especially alien culture—but he figured this to be some sort of Azarath ritual for the dead. Most likely, this was the proper Azarath send off to what ever they may have considered their afterlife. It brought a sense of finality to the team, and even Speedy couldn't stop a tear running under his mask and down the side of his face.

The glowing specks in the air flickered, seemingly their last moments. One flashed brighter than the others, sending a streak to one of the specks in particular. It seemed to set off a chain reaction as many more of the artificial stars did the same. There were many lines of light that flashed across the sky, the entire process lasting all of two seconds. Each speck, looking as if they had finally died out, suddenly flashed in unison. It blinded Speedy just for a moment, and he put his hands over his eyes. His face was forced to look down, and the ground at his feet seemed to flash brilliantly as well.

And that was when Raven appeared.

The light died away, revealing the girl collapsed on the ground. The edges of her cloak were tattered. Her eyes were closed, and her skin was more of a purple than its usual gray. She did not move.

"What in…" Cyborg seemed to manage, his voice flustered with surprise and emotion.

Nothing else was said. Speedy and Robin were the first to kneel at her side, reaching to roll her onto her back. Her skin was cold to Speedy's touch, and it scared him. He had no idea how he was seeing what he was seeing, no idea how it happened. Whatever it was, he was now worried that this one chance at her coming back was too late.

Robin was checking her breathing, listening to her heart. Speedy already knew what Robin would find, though the Boy Wonder had probably already known as well. The Titan leader began performing CPR, starting immediately with the chest compressions meant to get Raven's heart restarted.

"Help her, Zerrich!" Speedy heard Beast Boy say. "Can't you heal her? You gotta!"

Speedy looked to Zerrich. The man was crumpled to the ground, one hand pushing desperately to prop himself up again. Speedy rushed to Zerrich's other side, helping him up and over to Raven. He mostly pulled Zerrich over than actually helped; the man from Azarath had almost no strength of his own.

"Is there anything you can do?" Speedy asked.

"N…n-no, strength…left," Zerrich whispered. Even with those words, Zerrich still reached weakly to touch Raven's hand. Speedy half-expected something to happen anyway—some reaction.

"Move, move!" Cyborg bellowed, practically shoving Robin out of the way. He placed his right hand against Raven's heart, his left in the center of the girl's chest. Cyborg's fingers suddenly detached from his hands, a lone cable still connecting each digit to the Titan's palm.

"Never tried this before," he said, nervously. "Everyone stand back! Clear up!"

Speedy took Zerrich's hand away from Raven's, everyone else stepping away. There was the sudden sound of electricity traveling through Cyborg's arms, and a large jolt blasted into Raven. Her body convulsed from the shock, settling down a moment later. There was no other reaction.

The electric sound built up again within Cyborg, and another jolt blasted through Raven. Her body jumped off the ground once more, landing without any response. Cyborg charged himself up for a third time, even with smoke coming out of his right elbow. The charge jolted into Raven again. She landed against the ground, her head rolling lifelessly to the side. The smell of ozone rested around the team, Cyborg's heavy breathing the only sound in the air. The sparking at Cyborg's right elbow and left wrist indicated he wouldn't be able to do that trick a fourth time.

Slowly, almost unperceivable, Raven rolled her head slightly. Her eyes fluttered half-open as she looked up. Her first breath was almost rushed, as if she hadn't received oxygen in far too long. The following gasps concluded this, and more life returned to Raven's body. Uncontrollably, she began to shiver.

"Get her warm!" Robin commanded, taking off his cape and wrapping it over the girl as Cyborg stood up. Starfire quickly surrounded the girl in a very slight green glow from her eyes. They weren't out of the woods yet, but they were doing far better than they had been. The twins were excitedly jabbering on in Spanish, a mix of concern and excitement on their faces. Beast Boy went to Raven's side, checking her over to make sure she was okay. He was questioning Robin up and down about whether or not Raven would be all right. Before getting any answers, the young Titan was on his feet and barraging Cyborg with the same questions.

Zerrich reached over again for Raven's hand. Their fingers barely curled around each other's palm, lack of strength from both of them. Raven's head turned again to its side, looking over at Zerrich with tired eyes.

"Your aura," she whispered. "You set off your aura. I…I could sense it. Almost follow…follow it home. But…I could only go…so far. I…almost couldn't break free."

Zerrich nodded to the best of his ability with the side of his face plastered against the ground.

"Then, something…set me free. Something let me come back. How…"

Zerrich smirked weakly. "You left something behind."

Raven seemed puzzled. Speedy could see it on her face even through the weak expression. There would have to be some pretty good explanations later. For everyone.

"So, she's gonna be okay, right? Right, Cyborg? Please tell me she'll be okay!"

Speedy looked over at the two Titans, Beast Boy tugging at Cyborg's reassembled hand. Cyborg simply nodded.

"Yeah. Our girl's gonna be just fine."

-

Epilogue

-

Getting home wasn't the easy task, nor had anyone expected it to be. Cyborg's little trick was out of the question, his advanced systems either drained or fried. Raven was far too out of it to be of any use creating a dimensional vortex back to Earth, and Zerrich had used up every last bit of his energy in his efforts to help Raven come back. It had been quite a bit of time before the man from Azarath had the strength to reopen the vortex and bring everyone home.

It would, however, be a much longer time before Jump City was going to get past the clean-up phase necessary for rebuilding. A good fifty-five percent of the city area suffered damage, ranging from simple rubble in the street to total loss depending on location. The protective energy dome that surrounded the city had taken two days to collapse; Raven's initial estimation of a few hours had been wrong. The city had been desperate for outside help, and with the long lasting effects of the barrier came increased panic from the already frightened citizens.

Eventually, the dome collapsed. The city had managed to respond as best it could to areas that needed the most help. When outside assistance could finally race in, they found many aid and relief stations established at various locations. It allowed more concentration on increasing the relief effort than the need for organizing it, though there was still a great need to restructure and determine what was best to help the city.

The Titans themselves found little time to rest in the first week since their victory over Trigon. While the Justice League had been a great part of the outside relief effort and had implored them on many occasions to rest and collect themselves, the Titans couldn't abandon the needs of their city. Most of the work by the team—as was the case with the vast majority of the relief effort—concentrated on the removal of rubble and debris. Entire buildings would have to be brought down due to their extensive damage, but that would come at a later time.

It wasn't until two weeks after that the Titans could finally take the time to rest. The League and many other relief groups continued to work in their stead, thinking no less of the ones responsible for saving what they could of the bay area. The death toll was estimated at about 8,000. Considering the population numbered approximately 731,000 at last tally, the casualties could have been far greater. Once information about Trigon's coming had been passed along—even with word that the Titans might have delayed his arrival—a great majority of the population had taken the time to leave the city. That alone had saved many lives.

Perhaps in time, the media would attempt to look at other aspects of the terrible ordeal, asking questions about prior knowledge and why the city hadn't been forced to evacuate instead of leaving it as a choice. Some people would become angry, casting blame on things and beings other than Trigon, such as the Titans themselves. They would have their critics, possibly because of their easy access versus a monster now vanquished. It was the way of the world, and nothing would prevent people from responding in nasty, uncalled for ways. For now, the city was grateful it had survived. Regardless of what came later, the greater population would always be thankful.

Work continued throughout the city, the clean up seemingly endless. It was on request by Robin that Titans Tower be put towards the end of the list for repairs. The Titans leader stood in the lounge looking out at the open bay waters. A very few amount of window panels had been replaced on the Tower, just enough to allow the place to function. Final repairs would come much later.

"Wanted a change of view?" came that raspy, nonchalant voice. To Robin's left stood Raven, a large book under her right arm.

"The water's always been a big part of the view," Robin replied. Admittedly, looking at the city from the rooftop still wasn't easy. Over the past three weeks the Titans had gotten only somewhat used to the sight. Whole sections of Jump were sporadically leveled. Everything within a half-mile's radius of where the observatory used to be had been wiped out by the cannon's explosion. Certain parts of the city had every other building damaged or half-collapsed, while other regions were completely unscathed.

The bay waters, however, were just as calm and blue as they had always been, contrasting Jump City's overall condition. Eventually, the city would be restored to match the beauty of the bay. Perhaps looking out at the water served as a reminder of the future they were all working toward.

Raven's head lowered slightly. "You do know…I couldn't kill my father. He's far too strong. All I could do was trap him. I almost entrapped myself in the process."

As much as Robin had hoped it wouldn't be true, Raven's sudden revelation was no surprise. Three weeks had gone by, and everyone had been so busy in the repairs to Jump City that a lot of basic 'what happened' questions were totally ignored. Robin had to admit, that was mostly his own doing. He had gone straight into work mode nearly the instant they had all gotten back, and the team followed suit right behind him. With the rest they were getting, the Boy Wonder was positive that the long overdue discussions would finally start.

"If your father could have been destroyed, it would have happened long ago. I guess it still can."

"It would take a vast amount of effort. And a couple of far-fetched miracles."

"It was a miracle you came back yourself. Do you know what Zerrich did to bring you back? It was amazing!"

Raven smirked, ever so slightly. It was the most emotion she'd shown even before Trigon had showed up. "I know the spell."

"How was it that he could bring you back from that realm, anyway? I mean, if Trigon is trapped there…what's to keep Trigon from being pulled here too?"

"It's not so simple," Raven said after a deep breath. "The magic Zerrich used depended on me to be fighting my way back. That realm…it isn't very forgiving. But, it can understand that which does not belong…if only for a short time. I was trying to get out, but I couldn't find my way. If I took too long, the realm would have claimed me regardless. Zerrich's aura…it helped me find my way."

"Like…having the porch light on."

"Nice enough analogy. The rest of what he did, the actual spell, was based on that piece of my cloak. That's what allowed the realm to recognize I didn't belong. It knew to let me be for just a few moments longer. Just long enough to come back."

"So, Zerrich sensed you in the other realm?"

"Hmm?" Raven looked up. "Oh, of course not. Remember? He doesn't even have any kind of sensing or telepathic ability like that anyway."

"Then, how did Zerrich know? How was he so sure you were there?"

Raven shrugged. "He probably didn't. I could have just as easily been vaporized by the last attack against my father. But what did he have to lose?"

It was Robin's turn to smirk. Leave it to Zerrich to save Raven's life by a combination of chance and hope.

"Well," Robin sighed, "at least we have the Book of the Elders. We can make sure that no one else ever tries to…"

"Um…" Raven interrupted. "That was what I wanted to show you." She handed Robin the book. He looked it over, noting the cover first.

"This isn't the Book of the Elders," he said. "The title…"

"It was the Book of the Elders," Raven stated.

Robin instinctively opened the book and flipped through its pages. Instead of the strange Azarath text that probably should have been there, the words were all English. "I'm not following."

"The book is fluid. It…it travels."

Robin looked up. "Travels?"

Raven nodded. "From one book to another. From one world to another. Or dimension. It's not truly a book or tome. It's a spell. It transforms the written text of any book or tome into the structure it desires. It can move on at any time, leaving the original scripture it had occupied completely intact."

Robin handed Raven the book back. "So no one can truly ever capture that book."

Raven shook her head. "My father knew what he was doing. The spell has moved on to another scripture, to gods know where. And someone will always be enticed by the false promises within."

"Hopefully," Robin added, "that won't be for quite some time."

The both of them simply watched at nothing in particular out the window for the next few minutes. The bay waters remained calm as the Titans watched. It was that same calm the bay had always been. A calm that would exist for a long time to come.

-

-

Raven's door slid closed behind her as she entered her room. She let go of the useless book in her hands, levitating it with her mind to her shelf. A small amount of time later there came a knock on her door. Her first reaction was to ignore it. She wanted her time alone for once, something she hadn't gotten a lot of in recent days. She closed her eyes and sensed Zerrich on the other side. Something made her decide to see what he wanted. Her mind reached out to the control panel on the wall, opening the door and letting Zerrich in.

"How'd he take the news?" he asked.

"I think he already knew," Raven answered, flatly.

Zerrich nodded. "I'm not surprised."

Raven turned around, not saying a word. She knew he had come here to bring up some other issue than her conversation with Robin, and she waited for him to start. Otherwise, she'd be kicking him right back out of her room.

"There was something I wanted to discuss with you," Zerrich finally volunteered.

"Oh? What is it?"

"You've still been pretty closed off the last few weeks. With this ordeal now behind you, I'm seeing…we're seeing little change in your demeanor."

Raven turned around. "Um, how long have you been here? Closed off is one of my defining points. You expected me to change?"

"You've already changed. You just haven't come out of it."

"Come out of what? I'm fine, with what we've all been through. Anything that might be different…I'm reacting no more unusual than anyone else would."

"You see there's something…" Zerrich put his head down slightly, searching in his mind for a way to describe his thoughts. Raven could see the mental search in his eyes as they wandered across the floor. "A thought occurred to me. When I first arrived in Azarath, after Trigon had been there, it had been terrible. I mourned. The loss of everyone I knew, my loved ones…my father. They had all died, and I would never see them again. I felt such a horrible anguish I never want to experience again."

"I'm not a child," Raven interrupted. "I know what death is. They were my people too. And, my moth…"

Raven closed her eyes a moment, pushing the emotions back as best she could. It was hard reminding herself that her people had been wiped out. She tried to concentrate on the positive; that they had died for a greater purpose. In spirit, they were able to support Raven in defeating Trigon. They had known all along what their place would be.

"Everyone else on this team, they've all lost someone," Zerrich continued, "but they've all taken the time to grieve. They've all felt that pain. Except you. You…"

"I can't afford to. That's just the way it is. I don't have a choice."

"There is a way," Zerrich stated, simply. "You do have one choice."

Raven felt like she knew where this was going. While possible, it made her very uncomfortable. "I…I don't know if that's a good idea."

"Raven, I've been able to grieve. You haven't. And you can do so without the consequences. Please, let me help you."

"I don't…I don't need…" Raven tried fighting it, but her emotions did begin to take hold of her again. The little furies within her that threatened to wreak small havocs on random objects around her. Or people. She squeezed her eyes shut, forcing herself to concentrate on the calming spell as she chanted it within her mind. After some time, she opened her eyes again. Zerrich was still there, waiting patiently for Raven to finish.

"You can't hold it in forever. I don't have to be in the room with you once we've done the spell. I…I know you prefer your time alone."

Raven couldn't say anything. She had no words to give back. Her eyes remained closed as she put her emotions back in check.

"I'm not a fool," Zerrich's voice continued. "This won't make the pain all go away. But you need to begin to cope. This is where you can start."

-

-

Somewhere between those last words and the current conditions, Raven had agreed. She sat just as she did not long ago, the two flames at her side, the plate of various powders in front of her, the traced symbol within glowing slightly, the both of them chanting in unison. She felt the rush of energy from the pit of her stomach travel up her body and through her arms. Her fingers tingled as the flow continued out of her body and into Zerrich's.

Then, everything slowed down. The tingling faded into nothingness, prompting Raven to slowly open her eyes. The glowing symbol in front of her died down as well, leaving the blend of ashes and powders to cool. She searched deep within her soul self, as best as she could without her powers. That was the first thing she noticed; it all felt and sounded very quiet within her. The demon was silent. It wasn't gone, nor was it dormant. The clawing of the beast inside more than likely continued, but it no longer had its outlet through her powers.

They both looked at each other, Raven and Zerrich. There were no words for the longest time. Raven wasn't sure what was supposed to happen next. She didn't like the idea of experiencing this moment of weakness, mostly from a pride point of view.

"I…I should go now," Zerrich broke the silence. He got up and walked towards the door.

Raven got up as well. "What are you planning to do with all my power?" she asked. Raven knew she was stalling. She didn't care.

Zerrich stopped. "I don't think it's too good an idea to leave the tower. I don't want this extra boost to fade on me in the middle of, say, moving a big piece of rubble over my head." The man from Azarath turned to look at Raven. "I figure I'd best just stay here for now. I'll probably be taking quite the nap later."

Raven barely nodded. When Zerrich turned back around, a nervous buzz filled her chest. This wasn't a good idea. Raven was struck by a particular reality. With her powers stripped away, she could experience any emotion without consequence. At least, until her energy built back up, which would take some time. She'd never had that free reign before, and she suddenly realized she was very scared.

"Don't go," she said, hastily as the door slid open for Zerrich to leave. He only paused in the doorway without turning around.

"I just figured…" he started, turning his head, "I thought you'd want to be alone."

"I don't think I can do this," she admitted. She would never normally blurt that kind of thing out, but her fear was overtaking her. Her instincts made her want to start meditating. "I'm…afraid."

Zerrich walked a few steps back in her direction. "All of us have to face our fears and pains. You will be all right."

Raven pinched her eyes closed. She was terrified. It had hit her that she truly wanted to avoid ever having to feel the pain she was now facing. She wanted Zerrich to be wrong. She wanted to convince herself that she could just meditate each morning and bury those emotions for the day. That, however, was part of her fear. She knew people well enough to know it was true. She couldn't bottle up her pain forever.

How do I face this? It was all too much. How was she going to face the loss of her people? How did Zerrich learn to cope with it? Had he been coping at all, or was he still fighting with it? Everyone on Azarath she had ever known had been killed. Even having felt their presence when battling Trigon did little to comfort her now. She would never see them again, could never visit them back home. Her mother…

Her thoughts suddenly concentrated on her mother. Arella. The only woman in Azarath from Earth, she had been accepted by the Azarath people just as Raven had. She had memories of her mother, always as neutral as the rest of the Monks. Yet, Raven could sense the emotions from her mother—always longing, desiring to express her feelings to her daughter. Setting an example, Arella never openly did.

Raven would ask as a little girl why she let her emotions run so rampant on the surface of her mind, to which Arella replied that she did not have the training as the people of Azarath had. Growing up, Raven was instructed not to read into her mother's mind, as it would only serve as a distraction. But, she never did forget those emotions she had gathered from her mother's thoughts. She had unconsciously tucked those memories away in her mind.

She suddenly longed to express those feelings back, but it was far too late. She had run from home in the hope her destiny would never bring destruction to Azarath. Yet, even without her presence, her home had been destroyed. They were all gone. Her mother was gone. Her eyes were still squeezed shut, and she was aware of the tears that had started streaming from them. Her heart raced within her chest, the pain becoming unbearable. Her breath became ragged as she tried to inhale, coming back out in broken pieces.

A pair of hands had placed themselves on her shoulders. She collapsed forward, not entirely conscious of the fact it was an actual person in front of her anymore. Raven's arms curled up in front of her body, her hands clenching at Zerrich's vest. She buried her face in the material, the sobs getting louder. The pain within continued to flow unrelentingly. Her entire body shivered in a pain and anguish she had never experienced.

The arms at her shoulders moved to her back, Zerrich drawing her in slightly. They where comforting, an odd sensation through the terrible hurt that engulfed Raven. She gave in completely to her emotions, squeezing in tighter against Zerrich's chest as she cried. She cried for herself and for the friends whom had died. She cried for the souls of Azarath, her mother, for the people she would never see again.

Raven collapsed to her knees, Zerrich following along with her. She half curled up in his lap as the tears ran uncontrollably. There, the two Titans would stay until both had passed out; Raven from her anguish, and Zerrich from the effects of the spell.

-

-

It was some time the next morning before Raven had awakened. She could feel the stirring of energy as her powers were replenishing within. She still hadn't fully recovered from the drain, yet her demons were already clawing for domination. She had gotten up to sit cross-legged where she had now been hovering for the past two hours, meditating in her usual attempts to get her emotions under control. Her face had felt swollen just as she had woken up, the tears that had come even in her sleep having soaked into her cheeks.

Zerrich had eventually recovered from his energy withdrawal. She was only partially aware of her door sliding opened and closed, the only sign of his stirring. That had only been twenty minutes ago. He had left her in peace to finish what she needed. It was only now that her state of mind was beginning to return to its usual neutrality.

Another half hour would go by before Raven had completely finished the routine. She finally placed her legs to the floor, turning from her window and walking out of her room. Her mind was calm again, the emotions contained. She eventually arrived in the lounge, finding that Beast Boy, Robin and Cyborg were already there. The three sat in the kitchen area, quietly eating their breakfast.

Starfire wasn't with the group, nor was Zerrich. Raven opened the refrigerator, pleased to find a fresh apple on one of the shelves. Black energy snatched it from its place and floated it to her open hand. She sat with her team at the same table, eating quietly amongst them.

Cyborg was the first to break the silence a few minutes later. "Zerrich tell you he was leaving?"

Raven looked up at him. "No. This is the first I heard of it."

Cyborg nodded. "Just mentioned it this morning. I kinda got the feeling he'd made the decision right when he was telling us. Didn't know if he'd gotten around to telling you, yet."

"I don't know why he doesn't just stay with us," Beast Boy spoke up. "I mean…there isn't anything left for him on Azarath. Where's he gonna go?"

"Did he say when he was leaving?" Raven asked.

"Tomorrow morning," Robin answered.

"Did he mention why?"

Cyborg shook his head. "He just told us there were things he needed to attend to. Dunno what, though."

Raven thought for a moment before taking a bite from her apple. Zerrich had mentioned traveling to other places before arriving here on Earth. Was there something about one of these places?

"We're all gonna see him off tomorrow. It'll be in the lounge. I kinda Thought you might wanna be here for it."

"Yeah," Beast Boy said, "and I'll be making my original recipe, tofu waffle surprise!"

"Okay, we'll be having regular waffles tomorrow," Cyborg turned to look at his friend. "free of surprises."

"Come on, Cyborg! They're good for you."

"The last surprise you fed me had my insides trying to eat through my outsides just to get away. No surprises, because I'm the one who'll be cooking!"

"Cy's got my vote," Raven barely smirked as she bit into her apple again.

"Bah! Fine! I'll be the only one eating the good stuff tomorrow."

Beast Boy got up with his empty plate, Robin following not far behind. It left Cyborg and Raven alone as they finished their morning meals. Raven suddenly felt somewhat awkward. She really didn't know if Cyborg was entirely over what she had done. Now, the two were alone together.

"Have you been okay?" Cyborg asked her. "I mean, with everything that's happened."

Raven nodded. "I'm doing better. I…I wanted to ask you the same."

Cyborg didn't answer right away. Raven was starting to wish she hadn't asked.

"It's hard. We've all lost good friends in this. Guess I'm doing the best I can trying to cope."

Neither said anything for quite some time. Finally, Raven decided it was time to ask the question.

"Does it bother you when you talk to me? Knowing what I've done?"

Cyborg put his head down. "At first. It was kinda hard, you know? But I realized you didn't do anything wrong."

Raven shook her head. "I killed her. I killed Bumblebee. I know how you felt about her. It's my fault that…"

"No, it's not. You didn't kill her. That demon inside you—it got loose through some nasty tricks and schemes. Yeah, I know it's a part of you, but it isn't you. That ain't the Raven I know. If you had any kind of control, you would have stopped it from happening. I know you, Rae. Besides, 'Bee wouldn't want me hating my friends for something they didn't do."

Raven nodded. She still felt responsible for Bumblebee's death, even though she had absolutely no control over her dark side. But, Cyborg wasn't blaming her as she thought he would. He'd seemed to come to terms with things. Perhaps someday so would she, with everyone that had been killed.

"Anyway, we weretrying to kill you, since we weren't to sure we could get to the real you in time. It's no different than any other time we're doin' our job. We all know the risks."

"I know," Raven answered. "It still isn't right."

"No, it isn't. But that doesn't mean you should blame yourself. I don't."

Raven looked at Cyborg, and the hybrid Titan smirked. There was some comfort in knowing she hadn't torn up the integrity of the team when she was under Trigon's control. There really was no way to end the conversation, so Raven simply finished her apple as Cyborg finished his breakfast. Both got up from the table as the others had before, going their separate ways for most of the day.

-

-

The lounge was rather quiet the next morning as Raven entered it from the hallway. Zerrich stood in the middle behind the couch, looking out at the bay waters. He was waiting for the team to awaken, as they had requested he not leave until they could see him off. Apparently, the man from Azarath had gotten somewhat anxious and was already up. Raven had to admit even after her morning meditation she had become rather anxious as well.

"So, you're really leaving?" she asked, to which Zerrich nodded. "Where will you be going? I mean, what made you decide on this in the first place?"

Zerrich stepped towards Raven. "I've been thinking. There've been a lot of things that seemed to have happened for a reason. Our people, they knew they would die for a greater cause. And I think they knew we would find each other. That became something of great importance. We would need each other to finish the task of bringing Trigon down."

That much Raven felt was true. The people of Azarath had tried connecting with Raven as soon as Trigon had arrived on Earth. There was only one problem. Raven did not contain the blood of her people—the blood of Azar. Except, of course, in Trigon, but that was a bloodline thousands of generations removed. When her people tried to commune with her, she couldn't hear them. She couldn't feel their presence. She couldn't connect with them in any way.

Zerrich's blood was, of course, from Azarath. His problem was that he had no telepathic abilities. Communication was quite difficult in that regard as well. Raven could only assume that their finding one another and battling Trigon side by side was some kind of fate. The instant Zerrich had transferred his power to Raven, she could feel the presence of every man woman and child of Azarath.

Zerrich continued. "I would also hazard a guess that the accident with our honing spell wasn't just some fluke. We just needed to figure out its proper application."

Raven simply nodded. She had already concluded as much for some time. Somehow, the siphoning of power from Raven had left behind her demon side. When it happened in reverse, Zerrich's blood, Zerrich's essence, became a part of her. There was some kind of design involved. A design beyond them.

"Maybe…my purpose is to help bring Azarath back. I suppose it really hit me while we've been repairing Jump City. As much as your home here needs to be restored, so does ours on Azarath. I can't be the only one left. There were plenty that left home."

Raven raised an eyebrow. "You're going to…try to restore Azarath?"

Zerrich shrugged. "Can't do it alone. So, I think I'll start by searching out our fellow people. This might be a call to come home for many of them."

Raven shook her head. "And you're going to lead them?"

Zerrich laughed. "I doubt they'd listen to me for long. But, I'm sure there are those that would warrant attention. People would listen to them."

"And you think you know where to find them? Did you have specific names in mind?"

"I think so. I won't truly know until I search. But, I must search. I think that's what I need to be doing right now. At least…get things going. I don't know if Azarath will ever be what it once was, but what it may become—it deserves a chance."

At about that point, Raven could sense the other Titans coming from the hall behind her. "I…I think it's the right thing to be doing," she finally said to Zerrich.

"You two sayin' your goodbyes early?" Cyborg said with a grin. "Can I take a picture?"

"If you want to risk it," Raven said, dryly.

"Yeh, thought not," Cyborg replied.

"Zerrich," Robin said, walking up to the man from Azarath. "I can't begin to tell you how helpful you've been throughout everything that's happened. You've done more than earn your place as a Titan. I wish you'd reconsider staying with us."

Zerrich nodded. "I'd be honored to join the team. I just feel that there are things that need to be done. And, I'm not sure how long they'll take."

"I understand. In any case, take this." Robin held out a communicator. Raven watched as Zerrich slowly took it from the Boy Wonder's hand, examining it as if he'd never seen one before.

"Thank you," he finally said, placing it in his vest pocket. "And, thank you for everything. You've been quite hospitable. Probably a lot more than I initially deserved."

Robin smirked. "Just remember, the next time you need our help…you might try asking."

Zerrich nodded. Then, he looked back to Raven. "I suppose it's time for me to leave."

"We'll see you again," Raven said. "You…you do plan to stop by at some point?"

"Well, it's not as if I don't know where you reside," Zerrich smiled. "I think we'll see each other again. Hopefully sooner rather than later."

"But you'll…I mean, you won't…" There was something Raven wanted to tell him. She wanted to be sure he would come back, but she didn't want to sound redundant. The future was far too unpredictable with a universe of infinite dimensions. It had only now started to dawn on Raven that she might not see Zerrich again. It was a foolish thought, and she berated herself internally for thinking it. Just the same, she suddenly had more to say. There were things she wanted to ask, mostly, but other things she just wanted to discuss. Raven found, however, that she couldn't say any of it.

"Good luck," she finally told him. It was the right thing to say in the end. That's what she told herself. He needed to hear support for his new journey, and that's what she would give him.

Zerrich nodded to her, then to the rest of the team. "And good luck to you all in restoring your city. We'll cross paths again."

Zerrich didn't say anything else after that. He walked over to the window where he had already set the candles in their proper place. He whispered a spell to light them, concentrating next on the spell to leave. It was a longer process for Zerrich than it was for Raven, but the steps were the same. The enery field surrounded Zerrich as the vortex formed over his head. His chanting grew louder as the vortex crackled, and with a flash of bright energy, he was suddenly gone. The spell died down, the candles going out shortly after.

And, it was done. Zerrich was gone. Raven unconsciously sighed out the air from her lungs, her shoulders feeling as if they had dropped to her hips. With practiced form, she kept her facial expression straight.

"Ye miss him already?"

Raven didn't turn to look in Cyborg's direction as he asked the question. "It'll be different, now. We'll get used to it."

"Fine, but…you're gonna miss him?"

Cyborg was pushing. This time she did look over at him. "Not particularly."

"Awright, we're just gonna come out with it," Cyborg said with a grin as he leaned towards Raven. "You like 'im."

"No," Raven answered, flatly.

"Wait, what?" Beast Boy belatedly piped up, looking at Raven as if she were under a different light. "Youwhatnow?"

Raven's tempter was actually starting to flare underneath her guard. "I said, no."

"Wait, how do you know she likes him?" Beast Boy asked Cyborg, completely ignoring Raven's presence. "I didn't see any clues!"

"That's because you're blind when it comes to this kinda stuff," Cyborg retorted.

"No way! You're looking at the luuuv doctor!"

"Oh, gods," Raven rolled her eyes, walking away.

"No, seriously! I can see these things coming before anyone!"

"Well, obviously you missed this one! Everyone else can see it! Back me up, Rob!"

Raven watched Robin put his hands up, "Sorry, I think I'll stay out this time." Smart man.

"Okay, fine! Starfire? You haven't noticed?"

Starfire, sure enough, inhaled a breath with a smile that said she definitely had an opinion on the issue, and she was going to share it with anyone who would listen.

Then, the warning klaxon went off, bathing the room in red light.

"Trouble!" Robin shouted. The giant view screen Cyborg had repaired clicked on, showing only static for the first few seconds. Then, the image cleared, revealing a visual at the front of a building. It was a bank, and some character the Titans had never seen before came running out with money in his gloved hands.

"It's the Community Bank," Raven said, "They only reopened two days ago—right along the coast. It's just behind us."

"Close enough to go take care of," Cyborg added.

"The Justice League still have quite a few guys here," Beast Boy said. "I mean…they could do it. But…"

"But," Robin finished, "this is our city. And some of these new criminals need to be better informed."

"My kind of answer," Cyborg grinned. "I take that to mean 'let's go kick some butt,' right?"

Robin nodded. It was time to take care of business.

"Titans…" he shouted as the team turned for the door, "…GO!"

END

Author's Notes This story took me much longer to finish than I had anticipated, but nonetheless I'm happy it's done. To those few that enjoyed it, thank you for sticking by. I'll always appreciate it.