Rating: R
Warning: May eventually contain slash
Category: Humor/Romance
Summary: Hermione undergoes a change in thinking and is determined to enjoy her last year to the fullest. Wacky hi jinks and craziness ensue leading to a list of amusing new rules for her, friendships with slytherins, and romance. This is my first attempt at any kind of fiction so please be kind. Constructive criticism is wanted, flames will be ignored. Hermione is a little OOC because of her change in thinking.
Disclaimer: JK Rowling owns the Harry Potter Universe and all it's characters, I'm just playing with them for a bit. There may be slash as I said so you have been warned. I got the basic Idea for this story from the list 213 things skippy is no longer allowed to do in the army. I stole some of those things on the list as I could just hear them being said in the HP universe.
Many Thanks go out to my Beta Gelsey. Whom without this Chapter would be full of errors. Thanks Gelsey.
Piccolo'sVampirePrincess - Glad your enjoying. Updates regularly so far. ;-)
tiffany - Glad you liked it. I'm hope your having as much fun reading as I am writing it.
Barb - Glad you find it so funny. I've been told I have a weird sense of humor so I was a bit worried. LOL
Amanda - Thank you so much for the review. I'm always glad to know someone enjoyed or what they think could be better.
LuvlyCalypso - Glad you got the Car. Hope you enjoyed the day. Glad you enjoyed and it helped you out. LOL
Dominique Fade - Don't die laughing please. Then you couldn't review again. (G) Glad your finding it funny.
alyssa-farrell - That sheep seems to be well liked. LOL Cheers to you too mate. ;-)
tiffany - Thank you. And I intend it to be a long story. I always feel so empty when a good story ends quickly.
lgobgirlie15 - Thanks so much. I'll try to keep em coming as quick as I can.
lil pixie - I thought Pokemon would fit. LOL I thought it would be funny not only to show Snape can have a sense of humor but to think of him watching Southpark. plus the whole bastard thing just fit. LOL Glad your still enjoying.
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Chapter 9
Detentions so far 9. List of things Hermione can no longer do at Hogwarts 10
Looking back adding hard liquor to the menu of a Saturday night party with the Slytherins was probably not the best idea in the world. Especially with Colin around to photograph it for memories sake. There were a few of those memories people would have liked to forgotten not shared.
Draco could have definitely done without the visual memory of hugging the beer crate and growling at anyone who came near, though he was rather happy with the picture of his first snog with Harry. It was actually rather cute the way both boys looked so amazed, blown away and excited at the same time, and yet only half their faces were showing.
Colin unbeknownst to most of us is very very brave. Of course he's a Gryffindor, so that is expected, but being younger and not that big you would think he'd cave after being hexed a few times by Blaise. Nope not our dear Colin he just made lots and lots of copies of those pics of Blaise wearing a dress and a pink hair bow. Hard liquor was definitely not a good idea at least in his mind.
The Saturday night party didn't really break up til late Sunday night. And even then some took some of the alcohol with them. Monday was not looking to be a good day for two out of the four houses in Hogwarts, as nearly everyone from Slytherin and Gryffindor above the age of sixteen attended along with a few Hufflepuffs and half a dozen Ravenclaws. When Monday morning came you could almost hear a collective groan.
Hermione, being smart, had had the foresight to brew up a lot of the hangover potion and was found early Monday morning in the Slytherin Common room selling it for a knut a piece. Word got around and pretty soon the Slytherin Common room was almost as full of people as the party had been.
"Now wait your turn everyone. I made enough for everyone." Hermione said over the clamor.
"Mione you know I don't have an extra knut. I need what I have for Hogsmeade." Ron pleaded with her just to give him some for free. "C'mon Mione I'm your best friend."
"This is business Ron." she smirked. "You have to choose. Chocolate frogs next Hogsmeade trip or one less hangover today."
"This is so unfair. Using your knowledge for gain like this." Ron complained handing over a knut and taking his potion.
She had sold her potion to most of those at the party when Snape, getting wind of all the traffic in and out of the Slytherin dorms so early in the morning, stalked in. Seeing Hermione in the middle of his house common room did nothing to put him in a good mood.
"Miss Granger just what is going on here and why are you in the Slytherin dorms?" He growled.
"Um just working on that whole interhouse cooperation thing Dumbledore is so keen on." She replied trying to hide the potions and money.
"That's funny because to me it looks as if you are selling," he swept over to her potion and looked at it and smelled it "Hangover potions." He sneered.
"Um well I guess you could call it that too," she stammered.
"20 points from Gryffindor. You may not run a business from the Slytherin common room." He looked around noticing the fallen faces of those who did not get the potion yet and the fact that there was at least a few people from each of the other houses. His lips twitched as if he was trying to hold back a smile and he said in a softer tone of voice. "Not even if it is a very Slytherin thing to do. I'll be taking that potion and I suggest you get to the Great Hall if you wish to eat before classes." With that he grabbed up the potions, smirked at those groaning and swept out of the room. "Oh and another detention Wednesday night Miss Granger. I'm beginning to think free nights are a thing of the past for you," he said over his shoulder as the door closed.
Hermione had planned on taking the hangover potion herself once she had sold it all. As it turns out probably not one of her best plans but she always seemed to wake up feeling sorta ok but her hangover intesified with time. So she had thought to wait until she was done making some money. Thankfully Professor Snape did not take the money she had made selling the potion. She went back to her dorm and grabbed her cool mint listerine bottle and the Vodka hidden in her dresser. She emptied the listerine out offering a little sorry to her parents as she did so. Being dentists they'd be more upset she wasted her dental stuff than anything. She poured the Vodka in the bottle, capped it and put it in her bag and went down to the kitchens. She asked Dobby for some green food coloring and added it. Hair of the dog so to speak would work just as well for now till she could brew another potion. She thought grinning as she headed to breakfast.
(A/N I know it seems really oc for Hermione to drink but it's kind of a coming of age thing that just about every teenager goes through at some time. Most learn it's not all that as will Mione.)
Potions that morning was rather different. Snape was still Snape keeping everyone in line but he didn't go out of his way to be cruel to anyone. Oh, he was still as snarky as ever even to the Slytherins, but to everyone's surprise he wasn't unnecessarily cruel. It was a rather refreshing change. Mione would sneak drinks out of her listerine bottle every now and then and when Snape saw her she made a big show of gargeling before swallowing and then offering a toothy smile to show her clean teeth. He just shook his head and preceded to make his rounds. Potions went well and for once it seemed as if everyone got their potion right. Professor Snape even gave 10 points each to Slytherin and Gryffindor for everyone brewing an adequate potion, effectively shocking the class.
By the time Arithmancy rolled around for Hermione she had drank quite a bit out of her bottle and was feeling very good.
"Mione, what's with you. If I didn't know better I'd say you were still drunk from the party," Draco commented.
"Green food coloring works wonders Dray," she said showing him her almost empty Cool Mint Listerine bottle.
"Mione. I'm shocked. Drinking during school. You're gonna get into so much trouble."
"Oh Come on. It's my last class of the day. It's not as if I have anything to worry about. Besides who cares if I get another detention,." she said.
It was at this point that Professor Vector decided to ask Hermione what the answer to number 12 on the board was.
"I'm Drunk," Mione blurted and then covered her mouth turning red.
"Miss Granger," Professor Vector said coming over to her "I'm drunk is not the answer and I do believe that you are," she said shocked. "Mr. Malfoy take Miss Granger to the hospital wing please."
"Yes Ma'am." He said getting up and walking Hermione out. "I told ya so Mione."
"Oh shut up. If you hadn't been bugging me I would have never said that." She glared at him.
When they got to the hospital wing Madame Pomfrey put her in a bed and asked Draco to stay while she went to inform Professor McGonagall. When they arrived Professor McGonagall lectured Hermione on the dangers of drinking until Mione sat up and retched all over the floor. Madame Pompfrey brought Mione a bucket as McGonagall cleaned up the mess with a flick of her wand. Madame Pompfrey brought over a sober up potion to which Mione said, "Hey thanks Dr. Feelgood."
Professor McGonagall took the potion before Hermione had a chance to drink it and said, "I think Miss Granger will learn a better lesson about the affects of her alcohol consumption if she doesn't get any potions Poppy and yes that means no hangover potion. Miss Granger you will spend the night here in the hospital wing. Your detention for this evening will be rescheduled for tomorrow evening and as you have one on Tuesday and Wednesday that will be pushed back you will serve detention for this on Friday. Also your privileges for the next Hogsmeade weekend are revoked. Also you will address our mediwitch as Madame Pompfrey not Dr. Feelgood do you understand?"
"Yes Professor," Mione said right before she passed out.
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