I am sorry for the HUGE delay. I've been overwhelmed in busy since starting college. For anyone still interested in reading I plan on finishing this. Not only for you all but for myself. Thank you all for your patience.
Will had a moment of disorientation as he opened his eyes and found himself, not in the doctor's office, but in a familiar dark room. It was exactly how he remembered it, bare and cold. All possessions burnt for warmth or sold. His eyes settled on his weary mother and Will felt tears spring to his eyes. She sat close to the fire, rocking her dear daughter in front of her. She looked as if she hadn't slept in days. Will listened as she hummed softly, comfortingly and rocked Lotte.
Little Lotte lay in her cradle like bed. The only furniture still in the house it seemed. She lay on her side curled into her stomach. The muscles on her face were tight as she bit back pain. She whimpered through the tears that fell down her cheeks. And Will found himself crying with her, sobs that caught in his stomach and came out gasps. This was the last day he saw Lotte. This is what she looked like then. This is how she died, in tears and pain. And he could do nothing then as he now could do nothing.
As if acting out his train of thought Will's attention was directed to movement on his side as the younger version of himself busied himself with shredding the last of Lotte's flammable toys. Will's and Jake's were the first to go. They would use Lotte's toys to dance before her bed and tell her stories in comfort and as a distraction.
Will watched his younger self's face. It was set and determined as he ripped apart the small rocking horse. Will felt a rush of the emotions he felt then, fear, responsibility, loss, heartache, fear. He was so afraid but his face was calm.
"It'll be alright." He spoke comfortingly to his sister and to his mother. "Jake will be back soon with money for a doctor." He let the hope spill out of his mouth. He prayed that voicing it would make it true. This was their chance for all things to be better. If they could just make it through this day.
This young Will was the man of the house but just as helpless as the rest. He could do nothing and that made him sick.
There was a sudden knock on their rickety old door and all faces turned to it. Will felt a painful knot forming in the pit of his stomach as he watched his younger self move to open the door. Just as young Will's hand tightened on the knob and began to pull another force pushed from the outside nearly knocking Will on his bottom. It was the Doctor, in his many layers, wearing a look of annoyance on his round face.
"Took you long enough to get to the door, lad." The Doctor scolded. "I've walked a long enough distance to get to your door the least you could do was not force me to stand out there." He bustled further into the room with a superiority that caused both Wills to scowl.
Finally stopping in front of mother he stared at Lotte. His trained eyes looking over the fevered face, calculating, measuring. He looked at her not as a child but as another job. A job he didn't want to do on such a cold day. Without word to mother he placed his hand on her face. Put his cold fingers on her neck to feel her pulse.
"How long has she been sick?" He asked snipping.
"About three weeks." Mother spoke quietly her eyes on her only daughter.
"Three weeks and you are only now fetching me?" He was accusing. Young Will fought to control his rage. He made it a ball and held it inside him. Older Will paced the room bitting his lip. Wishing for a moment his fist was solid enough to knock the Doctor of his higher horse.
His mother spoke unfazed. "We brought her to you two weeks ago but you wouldn't take her without payment."
The words did not touch the Doctor and he continued his inspection without a quiver in his mask of annoyance.
With the pause came a sudden realization and mother spoke up. "Where is my son?" Younger Will's ears perked and his brow knitted together. Older Will's stomach dropped.
After a pause the doctor replied. "Your son, after barging into my office, told me of your daughter's condition. A condition of which half the town has shared in and of which my supply of the necessary drug is non existent. I sent him to the doctor in the town adjacent to ours."
Mother's face went pale, the first obvious sign of weakness she allowed through her shields. "How dare you . . ."
"Though the medicine I'm afraid wont be necessary." The Doctor interrupted. "Your daughter's condition is to far progressed."
Young Will's mouth hung open at the sudden flood of information, the whereabouts of his brother and now the fatality of his sister's condition. It was all for nothing.
"You coward." Mother was a gentle woman by nature. It took something mighty to push her to condemn. "You forced a child to walk to streets where men are afraid to wander? You willed him into an area where men are so desperate they kill each other in order to survive another day? Men that kill their families to end their suffering. You've allowed into that place a child, my child?"
The Doctor finally looked into Mother's face. She was not a broken, pathetic women in poverty. She was noble and strong. She had been married to an honorable man, respected and loved. She was not weak. She was strength. She would not be looked down upon.
Older Will felt pride rise in him at his strong mother. A realization struck him seeing her face that his family was never lowly because they maintained their self respect. He was so fortunate for her.
"You will leave my home, Doctor." Mother's gaze never faltered. The Doctor stood for a moment staring still at mother before ushering himself out.
Young Will was spurred into action as the situation sunk in. He pulled his coat tighter around himself and moved for the door.
"Wilhelm." He was stopped by his mother's voice. "You will not go after Jacob. You will stay with your sister and I will go." Her voice spoke no arguments but Will argued all the same.
"Mother, I am faster. And I can be very cautious and hide if I need to. Besides it is safer for a man, even a young one, than it is for a woman." Will was set on his decision. "We are wasting time. Let me get Jacob and return." Will tried to hold back his impatience.
Mother's face softened. She was weary. She was afraid for her children but so proud of her boys. Her Wilhelm was set on finding his brother. She felt she would be doing more harm in forcing him to stay. The brothers were very close. Will would find Jacob faster than she could. A tear fell down her cheek as she nodded to her son.
Will ran up to her and kissed her cheek. His lips touching the wet of her tears. "Don't worry Mother." He didn't expect her to heed his words but spoke them all the same. He then bent to kiss his sister's fevered brow. With one more glance at the women in his life young Will turned and ran out the door.
Older Will sat now with tears pouring down his face. He watched himself run from the room. He watched his mother's strength crumble with her sons not there to watch her. He watched her scoop her daughter from the bed and hold her tightly against her chest with the most heart wrenching sobs he had ever heard ripping through her trembling body. Hopeless sobs. Sobs of failure and fear and loss. Will clamped his eyes shut and held his hands over his ears.