Daniel Jackson carried the CD player quietly into Janet's room, making sure not to wake up the sleeping Cassandra who had finally at 7am given in to tiredness and fallen asleep in her chair. As soon as he put the CD player down, he walked over to the cot on which Cassandra was sleeping to check on her. Kissing her softly on the forehead he tucked her in and then walked over to Janets bed where he sat down beside her. She hadn't woken up since the infection had been detected, still she was pale and fevered with her fever having gotten higher instead of falling but she was still fighting, fighting to beat this instead of giving in to it and Daniel was so proud of her for doing that.
Daniel leant over and kissed her fevered forehead stroking her hair that was damp with sweat back off it. She looked so peaceful that it was hard to believe how sick she was. She also looked so small with all the tubes that covered her and the tube helping her breathe. He doubted he'd ever get that image out of his head.
"Hey sweetheart. It's me, totally wired at 7am. Janet honey I know you must be feeling awful right now and I know that wherever you are now is probably a lot more peaceful than where you'd be if you were awake but honey I want you to fight this...I want you to wake up for me. I miss you so much...I miss your smile, I miss talking to you... Honey I love you and I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have you in my life. I know it all happened really quickly...I know you probably can't hear me right now but that first night we spent at yours, the day after we found out about Kelly... Janet I'd loved you for so long and that night meant so much just holding you and being with you...waking up next to you. I felt like the luckiest man in the world...and you know something I think I am." He told her tears running down his face.
"I hate seeing you hurting like this, I hate knowing that you must be in so much pain...I mean you can barely breathe by yourself and I wish so much I could just make it all better for you and for Cass. You were so brave to do what you did, to help Kelly like that and I am so proud of you" Daniel broke down.
"Sweetheart I can't do this without you...please keep fighting...please..." he pleaded then rubbing his eyes with his hands before taking a deep breath to compose himself.
"You remember that night before you had the surgery...we came downstairs when Cass was asleep because we were both too wired to sleep which I guess was pretty understandable. We turned the stereo on and just sat there holding each other with the music playing...just holding each other in our arms. I'd never felt as much love for anyone as I did that moment having you next to me and I'd never felt as loved as I did with you then. And do you remember how we went outside, all wrapped up in a blanket and danced under the stars? Boy I must sound really stupid. I mean I don't even know if you can hear...but I wanted to tell you that, that moment was one of the single most beautiful of my life, seeing you lit up under the starlight, your brown eyes shining, your hair all lit up so you looked like an angel and that beautiful smile...well I borrowed Sams stereo and I got the song. I just want you to know you have so much to fight for..."
Daniel walked over to the stereo and plugged it in, and then found the song that they had danced too. He turned the volume up as it came on and then sat back down on Janets bed, stroking her soft yet flushed cheeks and praying with all his might that she would get through this while re-living the memory of that night.
Now that she's back in the atmosphere With drops of Jupiter in her hair, hey, hey She acts like summer and walks like rain Reminds me that there's time to change, hey, hey Since the return from her stay on the moon She listens like spring and she talks like June, hey, hey Tell me did you sail across the sun Did you make it to the Milky Way to see the lights all faded And that heaven is overrated Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star One without a permanent scar And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there Now that she's back from her soul vacation Tracing her way through the constellation, hey, hey She checks out Mozart while she does tae-bo Reminds me that there's time to grow, hey, hey Now that she's back in the atmosphere I'm afraid that she might think of me as plain ol' Jane Told a story about a man who is too afraid to fly so he never did land Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day And head beck to the Milky Way And tell me, did Venus blow your mind Was it everything you wanted to find And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken Your best friend always sticking up for you even when I know you're wrong Can you imagine no first dance, freeze dried romance five-hour phone conversation The best soy latte that you ever had... and me Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day And head back toward the Milky Way.
Tears streamed down Daniels face as the song played, memories of that night and Janet being so well and full of life washing over him in a torrent. He truly didn't know how he could live without her now...her counterpart had been right when she said this was going to be awful for him. All he wanted was for her to come back to them and for the pain to go away. When he had woken up and saw her hardly able to breathe it was like his heart stopped beating and now seeing her look so fragile..A woman who was so strong and so full of courage tore him apart. He felt so lost, so lonely without her that even with his friends around a void existed in his life and as the words of the song rang out in the room, and as he thought of what they could have if she got through this the loss just felt so much deeper.
Daniel wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. The last few days truly had been torture and he didn't know how he had gotten through them. One thing he did know was that the young woman fast asleep at the other side of the room had played a big part in that. If Janet didn't make it through this, he would look after her, he knew that for sure though at the moment losing Janet wasn't something he wanted to even dare contemplate.
Tiredly Daniel rubbed his eyes and settled in his chair so that his head was resting on Janets bed. He picked up her little hand and held it against his damp cheek.
"Please come back to us...please." He pleaded kissing the palm. Then after once again gently kissing Janet on her forehead he drifted off into a restless sleep.
Five hours later Daniel was awoken by a tap on the shoulder. Rubbing his eyes, he sat up to see Cassandra standing there with a cup of coffee in her hands for him.
"What time is it?" he asked, taking his glasses off, wiping them and putting them back on.
"It's 12pm. We thought we'd let you sleep a little while." She replied. "You want?" she asked offering the coffee to him.
Daniel nodded and took it while Cassandra settled down again on the chair next to him.
"How are you today?" he asked the teenager putting an arm around her.
"Okay I guess. Look Daniel, thanks for getting me to bed last night. I think I really needed the sleep." She told him though still yawning. "You meanwhile look like crap." Cassandra commented.
"Thanks." Daniel told her smiling as a nurse came in and started checking machines and doing the usual tests on Janet.
"Why don't you go get some sleep? I can stay here and come get you if there's any change." Cassandra told him.
"I'm fine honey. I'd rather be here just in case." Daniel replied.
"Yeah me too." Cassandra replied.
"So is there any change?" Daniel asked the nurse who was just leaving.
"Actually Doctor Jackson...it appears the fevers peaked and has started to come back down. I'm going to get Dr. Warner to come in and examine her as soon as he gets in." The nurse told Daniel.
Daniel got up and sat on Janets bed, touching her forehead with the back of his hand.
"She does feel a little cooler." He told them both.
"And it looks like she's getting her colour back too." Cassandra told them joining Daniel on the side of the bed, noticing for the first time that morning that her mothers face was a lot less pale than it had been the day before.
"Just don't get your hopes up. This is a good sign but you have to remember she still has a way to go." The nurse replied.
"But it's a start." Daniel commented.
The nurse smiled.
"Yes it is. Dr. Warner should be in within the next hour." She then told Daniel and Cassandra before leaving the room.
Daniel leaned over and kissed Janet.
"You keep fighting honey." He told her stroking her cheek.
Cassandra took her hand.
"You heard the man mom. We're both here okay." She then told the unconscious Doctor smiling at Daniel.
Cassandra's stomach rumbled.
"Sweetie why don't you go to the commissary and get something to eat." Daniel told the teenager. "One of us should at least be eating properly." He added.
"You sure...? I mean what if..."
"I'll come get you I promise." He told the young woman. "Now go eat."
Cassandra smiled, kissed her mother and then got up.
"You gonna be okay Daniel?"
"I'll be fine honey, don't worry about me." He told her.
"See you in a few minutes okay." She told him walking to the door. She then quicky ran over to him, gave him a hug and left.
Daniel yawned again and slowly lowered his head back down onto the bed. He wasn't sure how long he had been laying there dozing but he woke up with the distinct feeling that someone was ruffling his hair. Thinking it was Cassandra he put his head up slowly trying to focus through his tired eyes but the sight which greeted him wasn't Cassandra seeing if he was okay. Janet was laying there, her cheeks filled with colour and her eyes wide open looking lovingly at him, her hand gently stroking his face. For a moment he just sat there not moving, not daring too incase this was a dream. Slowly he got up and sat on her bed and stroked her forehead. Her temperature was normal.
"Hey sleepyhead." He told her grinning. "Welcome back to the land of the living. We've missed you so much." He added leaning down to kiss her, tears falling on her forehead.
She stroked his cheek, brushing the tears away, then held his hand in her own.
"Cass..." he suddenly jumped up, gently putting her hand down.
"I need a Doctor in here." He shouted out of the door. "She's awake. She's awake." He said shaking the shoulders of an Officer passing by as the medical team ran in the room. "Sorry. Look could you go down to the commissary and get Cassandra Fraiser back up here." He asked politely.
The Officer nodded smiling.
"Oh and could you notify General Hammond and the rest of SG-1?" He then asked.
"Sure Doctor Jackson. Glad to have her back with us." He then added walking quickly down the corridor.
Daniel walked back into the infirmary to see Doctor Warner and his team checking over Janet, the curtains drawn around the bed.
"Dr Jackson you can come round if you like." Dr Warner called out to the worried man.
Daniel made his way round the curtains and took Janet's hand as the team carried out there tests.
"So is she okay?" he asked a few minutes later.
"Dr Jackson Janet's going to be weak for a few days due to the surgery and the infection but she's going to be just fine. We're going to keep her in the infirmary for at least a couple of weeks and continue monitoring her progress but it appears her body has responded well to the drugs she's been given and that the infection she contracted is beginning to clear up. Kidney function is normal and I don't think there's going to be any lasting damage. Now we're going to keep her on the heart monitor just for a couple of days, but I think we can take this tube out and give her an oxygen mask instead." The doctor told Daniel as Janet nodded in agreement.
"Okay Janet we need you to give a big cough." Dr Warner told her. Janet immediately took a deep breath and coughed, her colleague pulling the tube out of her throat.
Janet coughed for a few minutes, getting used to breathing without the help of the machine, wincing in pain as she did it.
"Take it easy okay." Daniel soothed as a nurse put the oxygen mask over her nose and mouth. "Better?" he asked.
Janet nodded, Daniel squeezing her hand.
"Right that's us done for the minute. We'll take you up for a Cat Scan later, but there doesn't seem to have been any damage done by the coma. We just want one done to make sure. The fevers gone, heart rate is back to normal, we'll check out her blood to look for traces of anything out of the ordinary and the scar left from the surgery appears to be healing well. It was a good thing you did Janet, helping that young woman, we've been waiting to tell you that. This place hasn't been the same without you." The doctor then told his colleague. "And you know something. You're a very lucky woman to have this guy here and Cass. Haven't left your side." He told her before leaving the pair of them, opening the curtains as he went.
After he and his team had gone, Daniel could see Janet smiling under her oxygen mask.
"You gave us all a scare there. I really thought I was going to lose you." He told her tenderly. "I don't know what I would have done if..."
Janet put a finger on his lips prompting him to be quiet. She pulled the oxygen mask down.
"It hurt so badly..." she told him. "But thinking of you...and Cass...you were what I fought for...I could never leave you." She told him. Her voice still shaky.
"And when I saw you in so much pain...I just wanted to make it better and there was no way I could. I felt so guilty sweetheart." He told her.
"It just happened...it wasn't anyones fault. Besides...you did make me better...you and Cass gave me something to fight for" she told him softly.
Daniel began to cry.
"Shush." She soothed pulling his head down onto her chest, the steady beat of her heart soothing him.
"I loved you for so long before all this. If I'd have lost you after realising just how much you mean to me...you and Cass...I don't know what I'd have done. I was so scared." He told her.
"I was scared too. The thought of not seeing you again scared...me to death." She told him honestly then beginning to cry herself and wincing with pain.
"Hey, don't cry. You'll pull out your stitches." Daniel told her making her smile. "You are so special to me you know that?" Daniel told her sweetly.
Janet nodded.
"And you are to me...That day when we argued about the surgery...it upset me so much...but it also made me realise how much you cared. I mean you cared enough about me not to want me to go through this...you cared enough to tell me you loved me just so I knew in case...and you cared enough to stand outside the night before all this and dance under the stars and just hold me all night..."
"Of course I cared enough to do all those things. Janet I love you so much. I have done for a very long time. That night was one of the most beautiful of my life."
"Mine too." She told him. "Not in a million years do I deserve someone like you." She told him putting the mask back on for a minute.
"Well you've got me...and I'd like you to have me for the rest of your life..." he told her blushing.
Janet reached up and touched his face.
"Are you blushing Dr Jackson?" she asked him with a gentle smile as she pulled the mask down again.
"Actually... I'm proposing. Going through all this has been awful but it's also taught me a lot of things. One of those things is that any moment I'm not with you or any moment when there's a chance something could tear us apart there's an emptiness in my heart that I can't fill. One of those things is that life's too short not to embrace your feelings for someone...or to hide them for a long time like we did. Another one of those things, and one of the most important is that I love you so much, and Cassandra so much that I want us to be a family...and I want us to be one for as long as we both shall live."
"Really?" she asked him.
"Really. Janet for a long time we ignored our feelings for fear of rejection and then just after we finally acknowledged them I nearly lost you. Now you're getting better...if this happens again to either one of us I want us to have had times where we have embraced our feelings...where we have got memories instead of regrets over time we should have spent together. Janet Fraiser I want you to be my wife...will you?" he asked her his breath catching in his throat as he waited for a reply.
Janet pulled her mask down and put her hand on the back of his head, lowering it enough so they could share their first kiss since she had come round. After what seemed an eternity, but a welcome one, both pulled away and Janet smiled.
"I've been waiting to do that forever." She told him as she looked at his nervous face. "Daniel of course I'll marry you." She then told added, Daniel leaning down and them once again kissing, tears of joy streaming down both their faces. "Don't you have any idea how long I've wanted you to ask that? I love you so much. Thank you for watching over me." She told him.
"Thank you for loving me... and for coming back." He told her, then following her focus to the door where a happy teenager was standing.
"You guys are getting married?" Cassandra asked. "I'd better be a bridesmaid." She told them before running over to the bed and hugging her mother.
"Mom I thought...I didn't think you...you were so sick and I was so scared." Cassandra told her bursting into tears.
"Shush. I know. I would never leave you sweetheart you know that." Janet told her. "I'm here now okay darling. I'm here." Janet told the teenager comforting her.
"I don't know what I would have done...mom I love you. I don't think I've ever really told you enough and I was so scared you would die and you wouldn't know...I know I can be horrible but I don't mean it..I never wanted you to think...I mean you're my mom, you took me into your home and you've looked after me so well... I don't think I could have asked for a better mom since I came here."
"Hey, Cass I know...of course I do. Arguing is a typical mother and daughter thing. I don't mean it either and I know it's hormones, I was a teenage girl once too as hard as it is to believe. Sweetheart just seeing your smile when we're watching movies or cooking, or having a girly night in is enough to show me that you're happy. Don't ever think I don't know and don't ever think I don't love you because you are one of the single most important things to me on this earth."
"And to me." Daniel told the young woman. "I don't think I could've gotten through the past few days without you." He told her.
"Or me you. You're good company you know that. You're gonna be a great step father, I mean you actually listen and you don't mind doing it either." She told him.
"Well you're not so bad yourself kiddo. Spending time with you was another great thing that came out of this."
"Yeah well lets not wish anything else like this to happen. I gotta get used to having two parents now and I don't want to lose them as soon as I get them." She told him smiling.
Janet looked at the two of them.
"You know I am so lucky to have the both of you. I'm pretty blessed."
"So are we to have you back." Daniel told her. "Lets just hope we have a good few years before anything like this happens again. If we end up with what our counterparts have we are going to be a very lucky family." He told her.
Janet smiled.
"I know." She replied hugging the both of them. "We already are incredibly lucky." She added looking at the two people she cared about the most in the world, then smiling as Sam, Jack and Teal'c entered the room arms full of balloons and cards.
"Nice to have you back with the land of the living Doc." Jack commented, tying a balloon with a smiley face on it to the bottom of her bed.
"Yeah. We just heard from General Hammond that you're awake. He's gonna be down soon. He just had to finish a briefing. We've missed you." Sam told her best friend leaning over and giving her a hug. "The whole base has been so worried about you and so have we. You've made a big impression on a lot of people here sweetie.." Sam told her.
"Yeah, probably because she knows just how to jam a needle in...I'll shut up now." He finished as Janet giggled.
"It is indeed nice to see you feeling so much better Doctor."
"Thank you Teal'c." Janet replied. "It's nice to be feeling better." She told him.
"So you're feeling okay?" Sam asked sitting down on the bed.
"A bit shaky, a bit sore and like I have one hell of a hangover but I'll live." Janet replied.
"So how long you gotta stay in for?" Jack asked joining Sam on the bed.
"Two weeks." Daniel cut in. "She's gotta have two weeks of complete rest."
"Think you can do it Doc? They do say Doctors make the worst patients." Jack commented.
"Yeah well I'm sure my fiancé will make sure I follow Doctors orders." She replied grinning as she took Daniels hand in her own.
Cassandra giggled at the looks on their friends faces.
"Fiancé? Danny boy you dog." Jack commented patting his friend on the back.
"Yeah congratulations." Sam told Janet hugging her. "It's about time." She added hugging Daniel.
"Well we try to keep you on your toes." Daniel replied.
The group smiled.
"I do not understand Daniel Jackson." Teal'c replied looking at his feet.
As Daniel explained and the rest of the team tried to keep straight faces Janet looked around the room. The last few days had been hell for all in that room, every single person had gone through a personal torture, herself included but all had learnt a lot. One of the most important things was that each had been blessed to have such people in their lives, and that whatever was to happen in the future they would always be able to rely on each other...come what may and no matter what.